Blood and Velvet
Part Three : Pillow talk
Dawn watches buffy in silence as she combs her long blonde hair. Buffy notices after a while and smiles sheepishly at her sister. "Sorry. Off in Buffy land there, I can't believe how many bad hair days I've had lately. Must be the shampoo, you're supposed to change it every once in a while huh?"
Dawn shrugs and pulls her silk housecoat tighter around her thin frame. Buffy always made her feel so self-conscious, not as much as when she was younger but still often enough for it to be an issue. She hated her own hair. It was so plain and boring she had been considering doing something drastic lately. Maybe a purple mohawk or pink dreads.
Buffy climbs in the bed next to dawn in her white hospital scrub pajamas. "I missed you little sister. I'm sorry for crashing your party with Spike. You've been spending a lot of time with him I suppose?"
"Yeah I suppose." Dawn replies casually. "But don't worry about crashing. We weren't going to do much but mouth off strangers." Dawn smiles, she had more fun than she liked to admit bad-mouthing actors with Spike. "Besides. I missed you." Dawn tells her sister seriously. "I never knew being on my own would be this hard. Which pisses me off because I know I have it easy. Who else but the little sister of a rich do-gooder vamp's ex-girlfriend would be given a house? Hell, I even have a maid and a gardener when I need them."
"Well . . ." Buffy smirks suddenly "I guess that explains why a mountain of trash and dirty laundry didn't pour out the front door when we came in. I wasn't sure what to expect."
Dawn laughs. "You should have seen this place a week after I first moved in. There were boxes, dirty dishes and dirty laundry everywhere. Angel came by to see me and was so appalled a maid and gardener showed up the next morning."
"You lucky duck." Buffy smiles fondly at her sister. She was glad Dawn was happy, after all the trauma and drama of the hell mouth she deserved the chance at a normal life. Spike of course wasn't supposed to be a part of it, but despite her feelings about that she was ultimately glad he was. It made her feel safer knowing the former big bad was here to protect her kid sister AND the key. They both settle into the darkness and silence, which is broken by Dawn a few minutes later.
"Hey Buff?"
"Hmm?"
"Is Spike evil?"
"How do you mean?" Buffy asks, tension obvious in her voice.
"I don't know. He used to be all about being bad and evil. But he's mellowed out quite a bit. I was just wondering if you still thought he was evil."
"If I thought he was evil he'd be a pile of dust before I let him anywhere near you."
"But the chip."
"The chip doesn't mean anything. Technology is fallible. He cares about us, he hates that he does I'm sure but he does."
"Have you forgiven him?"
There is momentary silence as Buffy considers this. "I suppose. I can't help but believe I drove him to it. I was a mess back then."
"Everything was a mess back then. He should have been staked for what he did to you. He should have been made to suffer."
"Dawn!" Buffy chastises.
"Well I'm glad he wasn't believe you me." Dawn continues quickly "But he could have really hurt you. He DID hurt you. How could you forgive that?"
"He's put himself through hell enough over that. Besides, I'm almost positive that whole obsession thing was just a vampire's way of rebounding. There's nothing between us now but some kind of against nature friendship and . . . what's with all the questions Dawnie?" Buffy asks, concern in her voice? The suspicion that something was wrong, having nagged her all evening and over the month or so Dawn had been here rising once again. "Should Spike be staked? Did he do something to you?" She asks, "What's with all the scarves and turtlenecks?" Buffy nearly shrieks, hysteria driving her off the bed to flick on the ceiling light and to stare at Dawn questioningly. "He bit you didn't he?" She asks, outraged at the very possibility.
Dawn gives herself a mental kick. Should have been more subtle. "No. Well . . . no. He's just been acting different . . . I'm not worried exactly but curious as to what has changed. He's less of his cocky lovely old self and more broody moody and . . ." She searches for the correct words to explain the changes. "Clingy?"
"Clingy?"
"Yeah. He's getting more like Angel, do you think it's an age thing?"
"I don't know . . . Angel isn't clingy."
Dawn chuckles, motioning for Buffy to get out of fighting stance and return to bed. Buffy complies.
"Well maybe clingy isn't the right word. But do you remember when . . . well you know I used to have a total thing for him right?"
"Yeah." Buffy answers tensely.
"Being the mate-for-life kind of girl I am it's been hard to let that go. I think he left the hell mouth because of me. I told him I wanted him, like the lovesick puppy I was I told him. I was drunk . . . so I don't remember what he said or even what I said exactly but I know he wasn't thrilled, being in-love with you and all. A week after that he just kind of up and left, he left a note for me but that was it. Then he showed up here one night, no explanations no nothing. He acted as if nothing had happened, as if nothing had changed at all. Only he's more . . . "
"Clingy?"
"Yeah. He's more careful about what he says or does around me. It's like he's trying really hard to be good but he finds it difficult."
"Well . . . "Buffy is at a loss. Spike had told her he was leaving to check up on a few things, then he was gone for three months, completely missed Dawn's grad and move to LA, and then he had returned asking questions about some chick with long black hair who might have been looking for him or Dawn. He wouldn't answer as to why he wanted her or where he had been and after finding out about Dawn's where abouts he left town. A few weeks later she heard that he was here with Dawn. And the chick? She had heard through word of demon mouth that there was a young female vampire matching Spike's description looking for her, but nothing had ever come of it. She had thought it was just a coincidence and forgot about it "I know this is off topic but did Spike ever find that black haired woman he was looking for?"
"Who?" Dawn asks puzzled.
"Before he came here he was at the hell mouth asking about some chick with long black hair. Wouldn't say why, except that he thought he might be looking for him or for you. I didn't think anything of it at the time because I was thinking human. But . . . "
"No he never mentioned her. But one day, I left the house to get some groceries there was this woman sitting on the sidewalk outside the gate watching the house. She had black hair. You know who I could've sworn it was? Chuck Jamesson."
"The singer from that band you like?" Dawn nods. "She's dead though right? You were pretty broken up about it . . ."
"Totally, I loved that band. She looked pretty beat up, and slightly off, she took one look at me and told me she liked the smell of my flowers and then just ignored me."
"Well, that's bloody well creepy. Did you tell Angel?"
"Of course. But she never came back so there was never anything to worry about. I think it was just some chick on drugs, but still . . ."
"Might have been. I hope so, you know Spike's taste in woman tends to be a little on the odd side, I hope he's not some woman he pissed off looking for revenge. Did you ever tell him?"
"No. It's not important. I just remembered it because she looks like Chuck. She has this, or *had* this great head of hair, and the talk of hair reminded me of her. The girl I saw had really short hair that looked like she let a two year old with scissors cut it or something equally as awful." Dawn smiles, partly at he memory and partly because she had successfully changed the subject. She wasn't sure if she had actually accomplished what she wanted to. She wanted, in a round about way, to get Buffy's blessing to start something with Spike. She wasn't going to ask outright of course but she wanted something like "you trust him why can't I?" to defend herself with if she ever found out about them, if *them* ever happened that is. She wanted it too, and part of her knew he did too. There were just a few barriers that had to be delt with first.