Katsuya One Half.

Author: Ozark the MoonHead.

Disclaimer: I do not own Yu-Gi-Oh. Yu-Gi-Oh is © of Kazuki Takahashi.

I do not own Ranma ½. Ranma ½ is © of Rumiko Takahashi.

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Well, I hash a few announcements for you! ^__^

1) I've gotten my computer privileges back! I get 1 hour a day on weekends!! WOOOT!!!!!!!!!!

2) I'm actually updating in less than a month! O__O OMG!! XD

3) I hopefully plan to finish this story by February 2004.

There's even a MAJOR twist to the story I betcha ya DIDN'T see coming!!

And without further ado, I give you:

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Chapter Twenty: Parental Problems.

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"YOU BASTARD!! YOU FUCKING BASTARD!!" Katsu screamed at Kaiba.

The young CEO had arrived not two minutes ago, and instantly barged into Katsu's room, mad as a hornet. Not to say Katsu herself wasn't any better. It had only taken one glance at each other, before they attempted to kill one another.

"Oh? So you're blaming all this on *me*?!" Kaiba growled angrily. "It's not MY fault that it would affect you as a girl! You were a guy!!" Katsu growled, before throwing another random object towards his head, which he barely managed to avoid.

"And THAT makes it okay?! I'm going to KILL you!!" She screamed. Kaiba glared, a clock skimming by his head.

"Look, I don't give a shit about you, but you are NOT having that child, Jonouchi Katsuya!" He growled. Katsu glared murder at him.

"What do you propose I do, you asshole?! No way in hell am I going through surgery!"

"You are if I say you are, you worthless mongrel!" He snapped. Katsu threw her food tray at him for that.

"Screw you, you fucking bastard! This is all YOUR fault! You and your stupid tournament, you and yer STUPID hormones! Burn in hell!!" She yelled fiercely, this time effectively hitting him with a mug. Of course, it only hit Kaiba's shoulder, but he was still pissed enough to slap her. That ceased everything.

Katsuya froze, eyes wide as she clutched her stinging cheek. There was a look of shock on her face as she felt it throb in a dull sting.

"Now would you calm the *fuck* down, and shut up?!" Kaiba panted angrily. "If you just get the abortion, we can forget this ever happened, and I can get on with my tournament." He said. Katsuya looking down, her free hand clenched tightly and trembling. He frowned. "What?" She didn't loo up.

Giving and exasperated sigh, he tilted her head up, only to get a big surprise.

Katsu had silent tears running down her face as she stared at him with weary, honey eyes. He blinked, eyes widening. "Wh-what??" He hissed. "Why are you crying?" She didn't answer. "The hell?! Stop that!" He growled. But she didn't and the tears kept falling.

This was a situation Kaiba had never been in, and he sure felt awkward right then. "Just…just stop crying already!" He said, a slight stutter to his words as he blinked again.

"Why…" She whimpered. "Why do you treat me likes this? I'm not some toy you can just throw around, Kaiba!" She looked at him with angry eyes, but still crying. "I have feelings too! And this is partly your fault, so you had better take responsibility for this!" Kaiba just stared.

"Wh-where the hell did that come from?!" He cried. "And no way will I take responsibility for something like this! How the hell should I have known you'd get pregnant?!"

"Well, I didn't either, so we have to do something about this!" Katsu snapped. "I-I'm not getting an abortion." She said defiantly.

Kaiba blanched.

"Wh-what did you say?!" He cried. Katsu met him eye for eye, in a dead glare.

"I. Will. Not. Get. An. Abortion." She said defiantly. "Want me to spell it out for you, Seto Kaiba?" She said, wiping her eyes with another glare. Kaiba was damn well near livid at that.

"The hell?! I can't be a father!! I have too much to do! I have a company to manage, and a younger brother I'm already looking out for! Not to mention this tournament I'm hosting!!" He cried. "I don't have *time* to be a father!" He said angrily. Katsu huffed.

"Then don't be! You don't have to be any part of this child's life whatsoever! I can look after it on my own, you pompous prick!" She said harshly.

"You?? Look after a child? Ha! Don't make me laugh!" He snorted. "You can barely look after yourself, especially right now!" He sneered. "What makes you think you could look after a child on your own, hmm?" He asked. Katsu stared him right in the eye.

"Because I don't give up when a challenge is presented to me, Seto Kaiba. And I know I'll have the support of all my friends to boot." She said, her tone dead serious. "And if you'd rather desert you CHILD, than help me at all, that's your choice." She said. Kaiba stared at her. That didn't sound like the Jonouchi Katsuya he knew in the slightest. He, er, she was no longer the rash, hotheaded teenager with no sense of respect, but a sensible young man, er, woman. He let out a heavy sigh, glaring to the side.

"I don't give up, Jonouchi. You should know that by now." Katsu blinked at him was he really going to…? "I'll…help you out." He growled out finally. Katsu smirked.

"Feh. What if I don't want your help?" Kaiba stared at her in utter shock.

"The fuck?! Weren't you just the one harping on me for not helping you out?!" He cried angrily. She waved a finger, obviously amused.

"No, I was just saying you're too lazy to actually take responsibility for something like this. I never said that I needed your help." Kaiba's eyes twitched.

"You little-"

There came a knock at the door as a doctor peeked his head through.

"Is there a Miss Katsuya Jonouchi in the room?" He asked. Both Kaiba and Katsu looked over.

"Uh…that's me." She said, blinking. He walked in entirely.

"Well, I have some news for you that you might want to hear in private." He said. Katsu blinked.

"About what?" She asked.

"Well, it concerns your being pregnant…" He said. Katsu blinked once more, but nodded.

"Sure."

There was a moment of pause.

"Kaiba, get the hell out of my room." She growled. Kaiba snorted.

"Anything that he can say to you, can be said to me." Katsu's eye twitched.

"Look you prick," She began.

"I'm the father, so I should be able to hear." He growled out. Katsu gritted her teeth.

"Get out, or-"

"He may stay if he wishes." The doctor pointed out. "If he really is the father, that is." He said in response to the glare Katsu sent his way.

"…Fine." Katsu muttered finally, with a smirk from Kaiba.

"Mutt." Kaiba sneered.

"Ass." Katsu snot back. The doctor coughed to catch their attention again.

"Now, this concerns your recent tests, about the pregnancy…"

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"Hey, it got pretty quiet after the doc went in," Honda said. "Think they killed him?" He joked. Anzu, Ryou and Yuugi glared at him. "What?? I'm just trying to lighten the mood!" He said defensively. "You heard Kaiba an' Jou tryin' ta kill each other just as well as I did!"

"Yeah, but it's none of our business, anyway Honda." Anzu reminded him. "I'm just glad Ayame calmed down enough to get some rest in the next room…" She murmured. "She's been through so much…" The other nodded their agreement.

Ryou glanced at the clock. "Oh! Yuugi, the tournament starts in just an hour!" He gasped. Yuugi blinked, looking up.

"But Ryou, I couldn't go to something like that now! Jou needs us here for support!" He said.

"Aw, come on, Yuge!" Honda said. "You really should go! I mean, it'll take your mind off of everything that's happened!" He reasoned.

"But-" Yuugi was about to protest, when the doctor walked out of the room. They all rushed over immediately.

"Is Jou-er, Katsu okay??" Anzu asked worriedly. The doctor smiled.

"Yes, she's going to be fine. In fact, I believe Mr. Kaiba said he'd take her home, too." He said.

"THE Seto Kaiba said that??" Honda blinked, just as surprised as everyone else in the room. The doctor nodded.

"Yes, I believe so. They were also discussing something to do with the news I gave them." He said, right before walking off.

"What news did he tell them??" Ryou asked, voicing everyone's current thought at the moment.

"I don't know. Let's go ask Jou about it." Yuugi suggested. They all nodded their agreement, and knocked on the door.

"Jou? Can we come in?" Anzu asked hesitantly, not sure if it was still as dangerous as it had been previously.

"Uh…yeah, sure come in!" Katsu called. They all slowly walked in.

Kaiba was standing in the corner, as impassive as usual, and Katsu was looking in much better spirits than before, sitting in her hospital bed. "Hey guys." She said, giving a meek smile. "Sorry 'bout earlier…"

"It's okay, Jonouchi!" Yuugi nodded with a smile. "We know you were upset." Katsu rubbed the back of her head.

"Yeah…heh, sorry again." She said.

"We understand, Jou." Ryou smiled.

"So what did the doc say??" Honda said, interrupting them all again. Katsu sweatdropped. Predictable Honda…

"That's none of your business, Hiroto." Kaiba said from his corner of the room. Honda glared.

"Hey, we have a right ta know about this as much as you, ya jerk." Katsu rolled her eyes. Definitely Honda.

"Lay off, man. Kaiba's just pissed. Like always." She smirked. Kaiba snorted, rolling his eyes with a muttered, 'stupid dog'.

"So?? What did he tell you??" Honda asked eagerly. Katsu sighed.

"Somethin' about screwin' up their tests." She grinned. They blinked.

"Tests? They screwed them up??" Honda blinked.

"What the Mutt means is, they mixed up her tests with someone else." Kaiba said. Honda blinked.

"So…? What does that mean?" Katsu sweatdropped at his lack of intelligence.

"It means that-" Katsu froze for a second. Wait…she didn't NEED to tell them…and it'd be great payback for Kaiba… "That I didn't really have cracked ribs!" She said with a grin. Kaiba stared at her in absolute horror. "They're just bruised!"

"Why you-" Kaiba made moved strangle her. "That's not what he said!!" Lucky for her, Ryou and Honda held him back. Katsu stuck out her tongue at him.

"Is too. He DID say they weren't cracked, just bruised." Well, he DID! Kaiba gritted his teeth.

"That's only half the truth, you stupid dog!!" He shot back. Katsu just grinned impishly at him. The others, needless to say, were more than confused.

"…?"

"Tell them before I kill you!" Kaiba hissed, shoving Honda and Ryou off of him. Katsu snorted.

"Fine, ruin all my fun…" She said. "The doc said that they screwed up my pregnancy tests with some other patient here." She grinned. "I'm baby-free." She said.

"SERIOUSLY?!" They all cried in shock, wide-eyed. Katsu grinned.

"Yup! Ha ha! Back to bein' a guy it is for me!" She said cheerfully.

"I can't believe they did that though!!" Yuugi said, still shocked. "They could get sued for something like that! Not to mention everything you went through!" He said. Katsu just shrugged.

"Eh, wasn't their fault. There's a million an' one people here, and they said someone here had th' exact same symptoms an' ev'rythin'." She said. They just gaped as Kaiba watched them with a smirk.

"I'll expect to see you, Mutt, and you, Mutou, at the tournament in one hour." He smirked, and left.

Instantly Katsu was bombarded with questions, all on how the hell everything had just taken place.

"Guys! Guys! Just calm down, jeez!" She said. "Th' first thing I wanna do, more than anythin' else right now, is turn back into a guy." She said with a sigh. "So just get me some hot water, and I'll answer all yer questions then, kay?"

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Jonouchi Katsuya had officially won his six locator cards. His duels with Espa Roba, Weevil Underwood, and Mako Tsunami had each won him a precious Locator Card, and a new Duel Monsters card.

He received Jinzo from Espa, Insect Queen from Weevil, and Fortress Whale and Legendary Fisherman from Mako. He was set for the finals!

"An' then I'll take on that stuck-up jerk Kaiba!" He grinned, marching along proudly with his six cards.

"Ya, way to go, Jou." Anzu nodded with a smile.

"I must say I'm very impressed." Sugoroku nodded as well. "You certainly have improved a lot since I last saw you duel, Jonouchi."

"Heh, thanks Gramps." Jou grinned sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head. "But I couldn't 'a done it without your guys' support." He said honestly. "Thanks."

"It was no problem Jou, we-Ohmigosh!!" Anzu suddenly cried in shock.

"What?? What's wrong??" Jou asked, looking over.

"Ryou!" Anzu cried, rushing over to where a cream-haired, tanned teen dressed in a sleeveless, purple shirt and baish khakis was supporting their friend on his shoulder. He had golden jewellery all over him. He had a neck brace, earrings, and two long gold armbands. Even his shirt had gold chains on it.

"Do you know him?" The teen asked, looking at them as the rushed over. Jou nodded.

"Ya! That's our bud, Ryou! Man, what happened to him??" Jou gasped, kneeling down by him.

"I don't know," The boy answered truthfully. "I just found him like this." He said, motioning to the limp body of the near-albino and his bleeding arm. "He's been bleeding really badly though."

"We've got to get him to a hospital!" Sugoroku said. Anzu nodded, and immediately called for a cab with her cell phone.

"Help's on the way." She nodded to them.

"Great." The boy said, allowing Jou to support the white-haired boy on his own shoulder.

The cab arrived almost instantly, and Anzu and Sugoroku piled in with Bakura.

"We'll take him to the hospital." Anzu said. Jou blinked.

"Wha? What about-"

"Don't worry." Anzu assured him. "You need to get to the finals before all the spots are filled up. Don't worry about us." She assured him. Jou nodded.

"Yeah, okay. Just take good care o' Ryou!" He said as they drove off. That accomplished, Jou turned back to the nameless teen. "Hey man, thanks for all yer help." He said with a grin. "I'm Katsuya Jonouchi, but everyone calls me 'Jou'." He said, holding his hand out. The other teen smiled.

"Nice to meet you, Jou. I'm Namu." He said as he shook Jou's hand. Jou grinned.

"Hey, nice ta meetcha, Namu. An' thanks for all your help with Ryou." He said. Namu shook his head.

"I was only trying to help." He smiled. That's when Jou spied his duel disk.

"Huh? Hey, are you a duellist too?" He asked, pointing to the Battle City duel disk projector. Namu looked down at his arm.

"Yes, I am." He rubbed the back of his head with a smiled. "I'm afraid I'm not very good, though." Jou grinned, proudly holding up his own.

"I've already won six Locator Cards, Namu. I'm goin' straight ta th' finals." He boasted. Namu chuckled.

"My, that's impressive." He looked Jou over slightly. "Say, aren't you the same Katsuya Jonouchi that has that rare, 'Black Dragon Priestess of the Moon' card?" He asked curiously. Jou grinned.

"Yep! Th' only one o' it's kind!" He said, holding up the card proudly. "It cost a lot, though." He said sheepishly. "I had ta work at a dead-end job for, like, three months ta save up even a quarter of what it cost. Th' store owner gave me a good deal on it, tho'." He said.

"Wow, that was very nice of him." Namu said, eyes studying the card.

(A/N: The card actually cost $1200 US, but the storeowner gave Jou a break. I was just too lazy to add that in! ^^;; Sorry!)

Jou nodded. "Yeah!" He placed it back in his deck. "But I gotta hurry up an' get ta th' finals, so I'll catch ya later, okay Namu?" He said with a smile. Namu nodded.

"Sure! Good luck, Jonouchi!" He waved as the blond walked off.

But as soon as Jou had his back turned, 'Namu's' eyes darkened and a sneer formed on his lips. 'That fool has no idea who I really am, and soon his card, and mind will be mine!' Malik Ishtar thought. 'And then I'll take what is rightfully mine! Ha! Ha! Ha!' He looked over to the alleys, and saw his Gurus Hunters waiting and ready. 'Perfect. Be ready, my Gurus Hunters! We will take that wannabe Duellist Jonouchi and his card by force!'

"Hey! Jou! Wait up!" Namu called, running to catch up with the blond. Jou blinked, looking back.

"Eh? What can I do for ya, Namu?" He asked, turning around completely. Namu ran over.

"I was wondering if you could give me some duelling tips." He said. "Since I'm not all, that good." Jou chuckled.

"You bet! I got so many duellin' tips, it'll make your head hurt!" He boasted with a grin. Namu laughed.

"Thanks, this means a lot to me!" Jou nodded.

"No sweat, bud!" He said. Namu suddenly caught a bunch of men in trench coats stalking towards them, surrounding them.

"Jou, look out behind you!" He cried, pointing directly behind the blond. "Oh!" He gasped as he himself was suddenly grabbed.

"Hey! Let him go, ya jerks!!" Jou growled, punching the one holding Namu hostage. Namu quickly dashed to the side, gasping once more.

"Jou!! Look out!" He cried as one brought their hands down behind Jou's head.

"Ah!" He yelped, falling to the ground.

"Jonouchi!" He cried, running over. "Are you okay??" But he inwardly smirked. 'This is all too easy…'

"Ugh…I've been betta…" He said weakly, pushing himself off the hard concrete. He suddenly forced himself to his feet, taking out another guy who'd been about to grab Namu again. "Run, Namu!" He panted. "I'll take care a' these goons!" He said. Namu was about to protest, when he was grabbed from behind, and a hand put over his mouth.

"Mrph!! Mrph!!" Jou blinked, looking back.

"Wha-? Namu!" Namu just shook his head, trying to 'warn' Jou, right before he was knocked unconscious by one of the taller and buffer Gurus Hunters. With a groan of pain, he slumped to the ground. The Hunter holding Namu released him, and he smirked.

"That was too easy." Malik sneered down at the unconscious blond.

"What are your orders, Master Malik?" They asked. Malik smirked.

"Take him back to the ship, and tie him up. I'll deal with him personally." They bowed, and Jou was dragged away into the shadows.

'Soon, Pharaoh.' He thought with a sneer. "Soon all your power will be mine, and I shall rule the world!"

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^______^ and there we go! Chapter Twenty ish finally completed! Woot! XD Betcha didn't expect Jou to turn out NOT to be pregnant, did you?? Huh? Huh?? :P The only one's who'd know are my buddies at school, 'cause I told them. ;; lol.

Thanks for reading!

-Ozark the MoonHead.