TITLE: I Want You To Want Me
AUTHOR: ClarySage FANDOM: Gundam Wing
PAIRING: 1x2x1 DISCLAIMER: Not mine, someone else's.
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: none really. FEEDBACK: Why coi-ten-ly!
AUTHOR NOTES: huh. Not sure if it really matches the other.you be the judge! ^_^'
There's something about Duo when he's sleeping, as if every defense he's learned to construct is shattered and gone. Perhaps it's poor training, or leftover from being a child who lived. It's strange though, how suddenly, his features relax, hands curling beneath his chin, mouth growing slack and somehow sweeter.
I've never let him know that I watch him like this when he sleeps, never let him see a side of me he doesn't want to know exists. Duo likes to think our relationship is something unreal, something that will actually end one day. I've stopped trying to dissuade him of that notion, instead remembering that once I would've believed the same as he does. There is no true way to tell him about my feelings, since they are things I seem incapable of putting into words.
He says that he hates me, and for a while, I let him believe his own lies. The boy who could not and would not tell a lie, lies only to himself. It's almost laughable.
He hates me so much that he stays in my bed, hates me so hard that he cries out his love when he sleeps, and loathes me so forcefully that his eyes stray towards my back when I leave a room.
I love his denial. The war ended and we started a new challenge on a new frontier. This battle is not really any different from the ones we had before, only now we fight each other. It's a strange fight, silent and painful. Yet, in its moments it seems to become a form of pleasure.
Even now, curled upon himself in sleep, his head has turned towards me; one hand strays beyond the covers until it finds me, clasping my arm in a desperate way, as if he'd die if I weren't there. When he wakes in the morning, his body firmly tucked against my side, he'll deny that it was he who moved, giving me a look as if somehow I've tricked him while he's slept.
His mouth says, "I hate you," his body, mind, and heart will forever disagree.
Nevertheless, I understand him. I understand his denial and fears. He once told me, that everyone he's ever loved has been taken away from him.
He says that he hates me, and maybe that fools the gods - but it will never fool me.
AUTHOR: ClarySage FANDOM: Gundam Wing
PAIRING: 1x2x1 DISCLAIMER: Not mine, someone else's.
RATING: PG-13
WARNINGS: none really. FEEDBACK: Why coi-ten-ly!
AUTHOR NOTES: huh. Not sure if it really matches the other.you be the judge! ^_^'
There's something about Duo when he's sleeping, as if every defense he's learned to construct is shattered and gone. Perhaps it's poor training, or leftover from being a child who lived. It's strange though, how suddenly, his features relax, hands curling beneath his chin, mouth growing slack and somehow sweeter.
I've never let him know that I watch him like this when he sleeps, never let him see a side of me he doesn't want to know exists. Duo likes to think our relationship is something unreal, something that will actually end one day. I've stopped trying to dissuade him of that notion, instead remembering that once I would've believed the same as he does. There is no true way to tell him about my feelings, since they are things I seem incapable of putting into words.
He says that he hates me, and for a while, I let him believe his own lies. The boy who could not and would not tell a lie, lies only to himself. It's almost laughable.
He hates me so much that he stays in my bed, hates me so hard that he cries out his love when he sleeps, and loathes me so forcefully that his eyes stray towards my back when I leave a room.
I love his denial. The war ended and we started a new challenge on a new frontier. This battle is not really any different from the ones we had before, only now we fight each other. It's a strange fight, silent and painful. Yet, in its moments it seems to become a form of pleasure.
Even now, curled upon himself in sleep, his head has turned towards me; one hand strays beyond the covers until it finds me, clasping my arm in a desperate way, as if he'd die if I weren't there. When he wakes in the morning, his body firmly tucked against my side, he'll deny that it was he who moved, giving me a look as if somehow I've tricked him while he's slept.
His mouth says, "I hate you," his body, mind, and heart will forever disagree.
Nevertheless, I understand him. I understand his denial and fears. He once told me, that everyone he's ever loved has been taken away from him.
He says that he hates me, and maybe that fools the gods - but it will never fool me.