Disclaimer: Tolkien's.
A/N: Darn computer is driving me nuts. Well, here is the next chap. A little lighter than the others. Not too light. Have not decided on A/L. A sneak peek at El/Er.
"Have you seen Haldir?"
"Glorfindel, that's the tenth time this night that you have asked me. Again, I have not seen him. As I did not see him yesterday, or the day before last. I last saw him the day Rhyden attacked him. I may have glimpsed him, but I do not know if it was him. But no, he did not leave. I have asked the others, they have seen him. I think the only people who have not seen him in the past three days are you, me, and Ecthelion." Erestor sighed, a little exasperated. "And yes, I have told everyone to tell him that you wish to speak to him. But everyone is a little preoccupied, what with the war and all. Yes, I understand your need to speak to him otherwise I would not help you in looking for him. And yes, I believe everyone has told him your desire to speak to him. He is obviously ignoring us. Either that or he no longer understands elvish or the common tongue, or any form of language that involves speaking your name. But..mmph"
Glorfindel got tired of his friend's babbling so he covered Erestor's mouth with his palm.
"I get it. I'm sorry. It's just I have been trying to talk to him these past three days. But, he seems to be either busy all the time or nowhere to be found!" And Glorfindel was getting desperate. If not for the war and preparations to leave for Gondor, he would drag Haldir to a place where they could talk…as soon as he found him. The problem was, he could not even get near the March Warden. As soon as he was able to spot the younger elf, Haldir would disappear in the blink of an eye. They never even met accidentally on corridors or hallways.
"Maybe he is deliberately avoiding you. No wait, on second thought, that's not a maybe. Like I said, he is ignoring us."
And Haldir was very good at not being found when he did not wish to be.
"I know. I just wish he'd give me a chance." The eldar needed this chance.
Erestor looked like he was about to say something, but didn't.
Glorfindel sighed.
"I know. I don't deserve it. But…he does. I mean, he deserves to know."
"I actually understand how he feels. As far as he is concerned, you don't love him, he loves you, and now the…um… one you…er…love is here." Erestor's voice held a tinge of sorrow. The March Warden's predicament was so close to his own. Except there was no third elf. He did not know if that was better or worse. But he knew what it felt like to love someone who could never return your feelings. "He doesn't want to hear you say it, which is most likely what he thinks you'll say."
Glorfindel heard the pain in his friend's voice. For a moment, he put aside his own problems as he was reminded that he was not the only one who had them. And in his friend's case, it was not even Erestor's fault.
"Erestor…" He began, but the adviser cut him off. Erestor knew he made a mistake when he let Glorfindel hear his pain.
"It's okay. I am fine. So Elrond now knows how I feel and is acting like it does not mean anything. No wait, it is nothing. I am insignificant to him. I cannot change that." Erestor tried to sound cheerful, but he could not hide from Glorfindel.
"Don't say that. You are not insignificant!"
"Not to you. We're friends. If I was insignificant, you are a lousy friend." Erestor teased, trying to hide the hurt he felt. He did not want to keep reminding himself of how Elrond acted like Erestor's confession meant nothing. In fact, the elven lord did not even mention it. Elrond was also too busy to speak to the adviser. Erestor tried to speak to him, but the elven lord seemed to keep postponing it. Erestor knew the war was of utmost importance, but Elrond…
"Maybe he misunderstood what you wrote?" Glorfindel suggested.
"Dear Elrond, we are on our way to Helm's Deep. You and I both know that Glorfindel will stop at nothing to try and save Haldir. He may not admit it but we both know he loves the damned elf. I cannot let him go alone. He will need help. I know you would have gone yourself if you could, but right now, your place is here. I think you can do without us for now. Take care. Tell Elladan and Elrohir not to worry. We are too stubborn to die.
P.S. I borrowed your extra sword, seeing as I don't have one.
And Elrond, should we never see each other again, I want you to know that…I mean, I know this will come as a surprise, or maybe not but, I am in love with you, have been ever since we met, which was roughly three thousand years ago. I know this is the worst time I could tell you, but I had to before I lose courage. I just thought you should know. Don't worry, you don't have to do anything. This is all. I love you. Your adviser, Erestor." The last words came out as a whisper.
For a while, Glorfindel said nothing.
"Where could he have made a mistake in interpretation, mellon nin?" Erestor said in a slightly quivering voice that he tried so hard to control.
Glorfindel had no answer. "Are you sure…"
"Yes, Glorfindel, I'm sure that's how the letter went. Elves have near perfect memory, you know that. I still remember the first words I told you, you think I cannot remember a letter I wrote only days ago? Damn it!" Erestor angrily wiped away the tears that rolled down his cheeks. He promised himself he would not cry over this. He had three thousand years to prepare for Elrond's rejection!
"Why are we talking about me anyway? We are looking for Haldir, and you are the one with problems! Damn it to hell!" The tears were not stopping, so he continued to wipe them away with the back of his hand. Damn Glorfindel. This was his fault. Damn Elrond, too.
/Why did I have to love him?/
Glorfindel was surprised to find Erestor crying. He had never seen his friend cry. The adviser was always so cheerful.
"Damn it!" Erestor cursed again.
Glorfindel pulled his friend into an embrace. Erestor struggled for a while, but gave up in the end. With a sigh, he let the eldar hold him, understanding that they both needed this.
"This is your fault." He mumbled against the blond elf's chest.
Glorfindel chuckled.
"Aiya, Erestor. We are too old for this."
"What? Crying, making stupid mistakes, not admitting feelings when we should, or admitting when we shouldn't?" Erestor sighed, his face still buried in his friend's chest. "Yes. Yes, we are."
They stood in silence, both reveling in their own pain.
Their musings were cut short when they heard a throat being cleared somewhere beside them. They broke apart and turned to look at the other person.
"You should get a room, not stand on a wall where everyone can see you." Came a gruff voice.
Both elves smiled.
"We are just friends, Master Dwarf. We are allowed to stand on a wall and embrace." Glorfindel told the seemingly annoyed dwarf.
"Oh? Like Aragorn and Legolas are just friends?" Gimli inquired.
"Definitely not!" Erestor and Glorfindel both exclaimed, and the three burst into laughter.
After the laughter died, Gimli looked at the blond elf.
"I hear you are looking for the March Warden of Lorien? Legolas bid me to tell you he is at the main keep, with Gandalf and the humans, helping with the planning for tomorrow's departure."
Glorfindel's eyes lit up. Before he could say anything, Erestor urged him to go.
"What are you waiting for? That damned elf does not stay in one place for long. Go before he disappears again!"
Glorfindel nodded and bolted towards the main keep.
"Thank you, master Dwarf." He said even as he ran.
Gimli watched the departing elf and shook his head. Then his eyes focused on the dark-haired elf with him.
"You are right." The dwarf grinned. "You two are not like Aragorn and Legolas. When you said you were just friends, you meant it."
Erestor could not sustain a laugh. The dwarf had a good sense of humor.
"So, are you just friends with Lord Elrond?"
Glorfindel arrived only to find out he missed Haldir again.
"Do you know where he went?" He asked the human standing by the door.
"No, sir. I am sorry."
Glorfindel closed his eyes and sighed, shoulders sagging in defeat.
/Haldir, please stop running from me. Please./
"You want me to tie him down?"
Glorfindel opened his eyes, expecting to see a smiling prince of Mirkwood. But Legolas looked dead serious.
"He is hurting. I want to help. But he's stubborn."
Glorfindel smiled. "Thank you, Legolas. But I don't think tying him down is appropriate in this situation."
"Well, you better catch him soon then."
"I'll try my best."
/And if it doesn't work, I'll take you up on that offer and tie him down./ Glorfindel vowed silently.
With a nod, Legolas left in search for his dwarven friend, leaving the eldar standing by the door.
The army left Helm's Deep early in the morning. There were others who have gone ahead, and the reunited members of the fellowship were once again broken. They were on their way to Gondor, the place closest to Mordor. Soon, another battle will take place.
The Battle at Pelennor Fields was another victory for those who fought Sauron. More elves came to help, including Elladan and Elrohir, and other elves from different places. They offered to make a stand with the humans, and once again join forces to fight the evil lord.
Faramir of Gondor was saved from his lunatic father. Theoden, King of Rohan, died fighting a Lord Nazgul. Merry, the hobbit, and Eowyn, sister of Eomer, were injured as well. Survivors of the huge battle were brought to the Healing Houses in Minas Tirith. There, the army regrouped, and more forces joined them in preparation for the great battle. But for now, they had a few days' rest, to heal, plan, and prepare.
Glorfindel had not yet given up trying to talk to Haldir. He would never give up. He'd die trying if he had to. And he was making progress. He was finally able to come close to the March Warden just before they left for Pelennor Fields. But the younger elf turned away and would not look at him. Glorfindel was surprised at the coldness he saw in Haldir's eyes.
He had long enlisted the aid of everyone willing to help. Aside from Erestor, Legolas and Gimli, Ecthelion and the twins have offered to help him. Elladan and Elrohir had proposed kidnapping the March Warden, but again, Glorfindel declined, though he had begun to seriously consider it. Ecthelion had been very understanding. Perhaps too understanding, but it could just be the eldar's guilty conscience. Ecthelion was letting Glorfindel have all the time and space he needed, and was even helping him. At times, Glorfindel was sorely tempted to just give up. But he couldn't.
/I owe this to Haldir. I should have done this a long time ago./
"See him?" Elladan asked his twin brother. Now his faithful helpers were with him again. Five elves and a dwarf were perched on the watchtower, looking for a certain elusive March Warden.
Legolas had told them he would try to talk to Haldir alone. Maybe he could convince the March Warden to stay still long enough to listen to one full sentence of not less than five words.
"No." Elrohir replied.
"What about you, Master Gimli? See anything?"
"I see elves. And you all look alike! Then there're the humans, swarming all over the place." Gimli grumbled, annoyed as he always was about everything. He wondered why he let Legolas drag him into these things.
The elves chuckled.
"I swear he is using dark magic. How else could he be this good at hiding? Or disappearing for that matter! Grandma must have showed him some tricks." Elrohir exclaimed.
"Well, from what I know, he was the best in his class. You know, among the Galadhrim." Elladan said. "Even as a student, he excelled in almost everything."
"And as someone who was trained to be invisible until he should show himself, he would definitely be good at hiding." Erestor supplied. Guarding the Golden Woods demanded peak performance and undetectability. And Haldir mastered all, it seems.
"This is stupid. Why are we doing this again?" Elladan complained.
"Because Glorfindel has to tell Haldir he loves him." Ecthelion replied before Glorfindel could get a word out. An awkward silence followed. Glorfindel looked at Ecthelion, trying to catch the other's eye, but Ecthelion would not look at him. The eldar was not sure what to make of Ecthelion's words.
"Ow!" Elladan exclaimed when Elrohir elbowed him. "What?"
The others rolled their eyes and then continued their task.
Glorfindel continued to look at Ecthelion. Finally, the other elf looked at him.
"I have been asking myself why you keep pursuing this. Why would you keep chasing him when he seems so intent on letting you go?" Ecthelion said in a low voice.
Glorfindel sucked in breath. He opened his mouth to answer, but the other elf continued.
"I finally figured it out."
Ecthelion's eyes filled with unshed tears. He did not want it to be the truth, but it was.
"You don't want him to let you go."
Glorfindel's breath hitched. Tears also filled his eyes.
"I never meant to hurt you." He whispered.
"I know." Ecthelion wiped the tear that fell from the eldar's face.
"I am sorry."
"Don't be." Ecthelion moved closer, until their faces were close, their bodies almost touching. "I knew I already lost you when we kissed at Helm's Deep. I hoped I was wrong. That maybe you were just surprised. But when I tried again, I was sure."
"I am sorry."
"Glorfindel, do not be sorry. You love him. That is not a sin."
"But I hurt you."
"You did not mean to. You did not know I was still alive. What we had was in the past, your other life. I have that. This life, you belong with the March Warden."
Glorfindel cupped the other elf's face.
"Thank you for understanding. I meant to tell you, but I couldn't…wasn't sure when…I didn't think it was fair. You looked for me…"
"And I found you. I wish for you to be happy."
They embraced. Glorfindel held on to Ecthelion, thanking the Valar that the other elf understood, yet could not help feeling guilty. It was nobody's fault, but he felt like it was his.
He had chosen that night when Haldir walked away from him. When he had stood there, between Ecthelion and Haldir, and felt Haldir let go, he knew.
/I couldn't let him go…/
"Last kiss?" Ecthelion asked, smiling. It was said in a teasing tone. Glorfindel smiled back.
"I suppose." Smiles disappeared.
Slowly, Ecthelion's head descended and the once legendary lovers shared their final passionate kiss. It was goodbye.
The three other elves and the dwarf watched in silence, trying hard not to make a sound, afraid to ruin the moment. They sighed, relieved that at least one problem was solved. But even the most perfect moments were meant to be broken sometime. And in the worst possible way.
"Damn!" Elrohir whispered, looking at someone just below them who was staring at the kissing elves. This was one time when elven eyesight was a curse. "Haldir."
TBC
A/N: Next chap may be the last one, if my muse permits it. Please review chap. Tell me if it's crap or something. Anything. I am still deciding how the ending should go. My sister suggested I kill at least two. I am considering. Haha. We'll see my mood. If I am gloomy, I'll kill everyone. If not, ah well. Another option is to get everyone to end up with others that are not their orig. partners. Hahaha. Tempting. Very!
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THANKIES TO ALL REVIEWERS.