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A few warnings: this is an AU fic that contains spoilers, graphic violence, and quite possible references to sex in later chapters. I'll up the rating once I get to that point. If homosexual relationships are not your bag, you won't like this fic. Don't worry, though; I'll put a warning up before any chapters.
Author's notes on the story and on reviews will be at the bottom. There are vague spoilers in this section, but if you don't know the anime/manga in-depth, they might go right over your head.
Rating: PG-13 for now.
Standard Disclaimer: They aren't mine, much as I wish they were. I'm not making money off this, so don't bother suing me. I haven't got a job, anyways.
Summary: The only thing that stands between the Sanzo-ikkou and their goal is the Himalaya Mountains - and a tragic event on Mt. Gogyo that may or may not ruin their chances to save the world. All former lines of good and bad are smudged and faded; just who the hell are the bad guys now?
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A King Reborn
Chapter One: Back to the Beginning
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Italics – thoughts
//italics// – memories
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It was dry under the trees, compared to out in the open. Well, mostly; it had been raining for hours now, and water dripped through the protective curtain of the leaves as regularly (and annoyingly) as the water that leaked from the kitchen faucet back home. Gojyo's hair was plastered to his neck and face, sticking to his cheeks and forehead, and getting caught in the corners of his mouth every time he sighed or yawned. His shirt clung to his back and under his arms, and despite how often he wiped the sheen of rain water from his face, it returned with every tree bough that hung too low and every puddle that Hakuryuu splashed through.
This day blows big donkey balls. For serious.
Gojyo sighed again and stuck his leg over on Goku's side of the backseat. Not that it was any drier over there; he was just hoping the irritating little monkey would rise to the bait and start doing his 'your side, my side' routine. That whole 'don't cross the line into my side of the jeep' thing. Regardless of the fact that they changed sides every time they hopped into the damn vehicle. But who cared - Gojyo was wet, bored, pissed at the rain for showing up when they were out-of-doors and pissed at Hakuryuu for not having a top to his vehicular form. A good tussle with Goku would take his mind off the fact that his cigarettes were soaked for at least... oh, two minutes. Three tops. Then he'd be back to moping again.
But the chimp didn't even look his way when he nudged the tip of his boot against the boy's knee. Goku had his chin propped in his hand, his elbow resting on the edge of the door. It hardly looked comfortable, what with all the bumping and jostling from the pitted, rained-out road. He wasn't fidgeting, whining about food, or whining about the weather, so he was probably asleep. Or staring at the back of Sanzo's head. Gojyo may not have been able to see the boy's eyes because of his russet brown, waterlogged bangs, but he was more than willing to bet it wasn't the latter.
He nudged Goku's knee again. Sighed when he didn't even get so much as a twitch. Goddamnit. It's pretty sad when I'm looking to the runt for a little bit of excitement. Gojyo's lips turned down, and he rested his chin on his fist in unconscious mimicry of Goku.
"Yo. Hakkai."
For an instant, Gojyo entertained the notion that the serious brunette had fallen asleep with the rest of them (or whatever the hell Sanzo did when his eyes were closed; for all Gojyo knew, he could be mentally jerking himself off - the gods knew he needed it), but then the driver of their 'magical' jeep tossed a brief glance over his left shoulder. "Hmm?"
"How far to town, man? I thought we'd have been outta these woods hours ago."
Hakkai's shoulder rose and fell in an apologetic motion. Drops of disturbed rainwater slid down the creases of his sash. "Sorry, but I had to slow down on account of the rain. The road is slippery, and Hakuryuu's traction isn't that good."
"Tch." Figures the rain would be to blame for all of this. Stupid fucking weather. No wonder Sanzo and Hakkai tended to get moody every time it clouded up. He was starting to get pretty damn moody himself. "Any idea how close we are, then?"
"Less than an hour, certainly. The map shows the next town being just outside the woods, at the foothills of the mountain range we're coming up on. We'll end up having to go over it later on."
Gojyo's frown turned into an outright glare, directed towards the trees that now seemed to pass at a ridiculously slow pace. "Why over the mountains? Why not around?"
"Because going around would slow us down."
Gojyo jerked in surprise at the sound of the monk's voice, kicking the monkey again (who didn't notice it any more this time than he had the first two times) and lifting his chin off his fist. Jeeze, and blondie over there hadn't even opened his eyes when he spoke. How could anyone make a crack at his expense if the priest didn't show the curtsey of opening his eyes when he was awake?
"And what?" he asked irritably, peeling some errant strands of red hair off his cheek and tossing them over his shoulder. "Going over a mountain will slow us down, too. Like Hakkai said, Hakuryuu's traction isn't the greatest. We'll be on foot before we're even halfway up the slope, and that'll shoot your time tables all to hell, Mr. Bigshot Priest."
Hakkai lifted a hand off the wheel to make one of those irritating flapping gestures (probably the only thing Gojyo had ever found irritating about the man – and after living, sleeping, and practically breathing with him for six years now, that was saying something) to calm Sanzo before he started slapping people around. "There's no other choice, Gojyo. In order to get into India, we have to go through some seriously wicked mountains, and this is only the start of the best path to lead us into India. We'd be going over a lot more mountains if we took any other track."
More mountains. Well, wasn't that just fucking hunky-dory? One more mountain range to throw on top of all the other canyons and valleys and cliffs they'd slugged through and over and around. As if it wasn't enough that they'd been thrown off a mountain trail already. The more times the merrier!
Fucking hell. If Gyumaoh doesn't kill the gods first, I will!
"Wonderful," he muttered. "That's just wonderful. Does this lovely string of shit-hills have a name?"
Behind the driver's seat he may have been, but Gojyo did not miss the minute turn of Hakkai's head as he glanced at their unholy priest. Which was seemed a little odd; Hakkai was the one who always kept things together, knew the in's and out's before taking a step in any direction. Leave it to the driver of their weird little caravan to know whatever was necessary. So why would he glance at Sanzo like that, almost as though he were expecting the priest to give him a yea or nay on whether or not he could answer?
But Sanzo said nothing, didn't even look up; his arms were crossed loosely over his chest, his hands tucked into the sleeves of his robe. If Hakkai was expecting anything from that sternly down-turned visage, he was going to be sorely disappointed.
Tch. The rain was getting to his head.
"Ahhh," came Hakkai's response after a brief pause, "I can't remember it off the top of my head. But it does say on the map."
Right, the map. Sanzo had the map. That was the source of that odd look of expectation. "The town gotta name?"
Another pause. "...probably."
Gojyo laughed, but it ended up sounding more like a squawk than anything else. Man, the rain was screwing with everyone's head, making them unstable – Goku was actually sitting still and making no noise, Hakkai was forgetting everything except for his dragon's name, and Sanzo – well, was Sanzo, regardless of rain or the day of the week. No one could exactly call that man stable... at least not after they got to know him. And not in that 'I will worship you because of a pimple on your forehead' way, either.
Hakkai shot him another glance around the head-rest of the seat. "You okay, Gojyo?"
The half-breed snickered again and drew his foot back over to his side of the jeep, crossing his ankle over his knee. "Peachy-keen," he replied airily. "My brains are leaking out of my ears because of all this goddamn rain, but I'm feeling great otherwise."
"I'm sure you'll never notice the lack," Sanzo muttered darkly.
"The girls won't complain," Gojyo agreed, "'cause the brains aren't the parts that matter, if you know what I mean." A flirtatious wink aimed at a man who wasn't looking, but would probably only ignore him if he saw it, anyways. Lack of a proper audience didn't mean he should neglect his skills, though. He'd be practicing them tonight once they got into town, that was for sure – maybe he'd pull the poor wet dog routine, find a pretty young lady who was willing to dry him off and warm him up...
A smile curved his lips, and the red-head let his eyes close against the light sprinkle of rain that filtered through the canopy of trees. Oh yeah. That was a much better way to spend the night than with these three losers, no matter how pretty Hakkai might be.
The silence returned as the jeep trundled down the worn track, more or less guided by Hakkai's skillful hands. A companionable silence, the kind that found the gaps between words among friends who didn't need to speak in order to understand. Sanzo might be an elitist bastard, and Goku a seriously annoying brat, but they all found comfort in that silence. More Hakkai than anyone, he imagined – hell, he'd lived with the man for three years before this magical little journey, hadn't he? He knew more of the quiet man's secrets than anyone else could. Just as Hakkai knew his secrets and Goku knew Sanzo's secrets, and Sanzo –
Well, scratch that. Sanzo was a tightwad who was too paranoid to allow his own emotions to the surface. And Goku couldn't hide a secret if he wanted to – he laid all his turmoil out bare, right there on the surface, in his strange golden eyes, without even trying to hide it. Stupid, in Gojyo's mind, but a lot of things the monkey did were stupid to him. Stupid ideals, stupid faiths. He simply could not see what possessed Goku to be so protective of Sanzo. The priest treated him like dirt.
Or so he'd thought when he'd first met the guy, before he'd spent any real time with the blonde go-fer of the Three Heads. He'd disliked the violet-eyed priest almost instantly, despite how he'd flirted with him; he hated the way he'd come after Hakkai (then still Gonou), dangerously injured and perfectly willing to kill himself for Sanzo; hated the blank look in Goku's eyes when he left the monkey to live with them, the way it had taken weeks to bring life back into them; hated the way Sanzo had completely disregarded the relief on the kid's face when he showed up six months later, two months later than promised.
But Sanzo, he'd come to realize over time, was one of those weird freaks that required complete control over everything, from his emotions to how often the tree in his front yard dropped leaves. It made more sense to Gojyo, the longer he knew the priest, exactly why he acted like that – Gojyo could appreciate the safety behind always knowing what would come next. But he also appreciated change, the adrenaline surge of excitement when a fight reared its ugly head or a girl winked her pretty eyes. He couldn't imagine living the life of a Buddhist monk, keeping to a rigorous schedule and never toeing the line.
And that was the kind of life Sanzo found comfort in, regardless of how often he denied it or complained about it. Especially considering that Genjo Sanzo, emissary of the gods, did not just toe the line – he shot the fucker full of holes.
But either way, no matter if it never happened again, Gojyo would like just once to see the priest actually admit how much he valued Goku's and Hakkai's friendships. That would bring a smile to Hakkai's face that Gojyo rarely ever saw – the real one, the one that Hakkai tried to substitute with false ones that never reached his eyes. And even if smiles came easily to Goku, the one that would come to the monkey's lips if Sanzo ever said "Yes, we're friends" – or something along that line – would make up for the six months of grief the monk had put him through, almost five years ago.
Gojyo snorted and ran a hand through his hair, pushing the blood-red locks out of his eyes and grimacing at the sensation of grime. Well, whatever – he didn't need to spend his time trying to figure the hypocritical bastard out. Let him rot in his self delusions. I've got better things to do.
He opened his eyes again, and was pleased to find that not only had the path widened considerably since he'd begun his little meditation, but the forest had started thinning out as well. And the rain appeared to be slacking. Better things to do, like finding willing women to occupy my dark and stormy night. Sweeet.
"Looks like we're coming to the end, guys," Hakkai said, first to break the silence.
"Finally." The priest in the front seat raised his head and opened his eyes, fairly glaring at the beaten path before him. "If I had known the weather would be like this, I would have saved myself the misery and put a bullet through my skull."
"Now, now, Sanzo," Hakkai said cheerfully. "No need to talk like that. Besides, it hasn't been that bad – Goku and Gojyo haven't fought once since lunchtime. I think that's an accomplishment on their part."
"It's not from lack of trying," Gojyo replied. "The stupid brat's been out of it all day. I haven't seen him sleep this much since he went and yanked off his limiter."
"I should kill you just for bringing that up," Sanzo growled.
"He's not been sleeping well lately. So let's just enjoy the peace while we still have it, huh, guys?" Their driver patted the gear-shift gently. "Besides, I'm more than ready to get out of this dreary drizzle and into a warm bed myself. What do you think, Hakuryuu?"
The jeep squeaked in agreement just as the path took a sharp turn, and up ahead Gojyo could see gray, tumultuous clouds through the break in the woods. Beneath the wheels of their dragon-turned-vehicle the rutted track deepened, showing the signs of moss and grass that had previously been unable to grow under the dense canopy. The wind that had been whipping the trees above finally managed to slip through the reach them, and Gojyo shivered despite his jacket.
Ten more feet, and it came into view: nestled at its feet were the orange lights of their destination, some electric, most not; far above the range behind it rose the oddly sharp peak, like the tooth of a shark seeking the pierce the sky. Despite the late afternoon hour and the storm overhead, the forbidding mountain loomed in stark relief over the small village, not softened in the least by the gray clouds. The rest of the mountain range seemed to almost shrink behind it, fuzzy and indistinct background co-stars to an actor who played a far more prominent role.
Gojyo shivered again without meaning to, bracing his knee against the back of Hakkai's seat as the driver brought the jeep to a halt. Now they sat at the edge of a gradual incline, and away before them twined the muddy brown track among a huge expanse of green. It was maybe ten more miles to the foot of the mountain, and there was virtually no cover between here and there.
"That's some fucking foot-hill," Gojyo muttered, and tried to shake off the sensation that the mountain was somehow watching them.
It's just a mountain, for crying out loud. Get a grip, man.
"Impressive," Hakkai murmured. "I can only imagine how long it must have taken you to come this far on foot, Sanzo."
"On foot?" Gojyo repeated. "What the hell do you mean, on foot?"
Neither man had a chance to answer before Goku suddenly came awake.
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Hakkai liked to consider himself a relatively unflappable man – he was used to the idea of 'assassins and murderers around every corner', so it was rare for an attack to come that he was unprepared for. Oh sure, they could get the drop on him, but he really wasn't surprised anymore.
//Walking through the rain with a steady, plodding purpose, just one more step his destination, nothing more than the blood on his hands and the bodies on his front porch and the children broken in a burning castle and the lover who'd never whisper his name again on his mind, ignoring the fire in his stomach and wondering 'How many more steps to Hell?'//
//Three years of living with Sha Gojyo, sex fiend and card shark, rarely staying in one place long enough to leave their own cigarette burns and stains on the carpets already riddled with years of living, biding his time with the numbing escape of chores and routine for he had no destination, trying not to imagine the children in his classroom broken and bloodied under his hands and hating his life and hating his name and wondering 'Why the Hell did that bastard keep me alive?'//
//Three more years of living on the road with a water sprite, a monkey, and a degenerate monk, nothing more than the sunset and a demon king's castle their destination, finding it easier to laugh and smile but knowing that he had been hollowed out by his rage and self-hatred all the same, glad that he'd been saved because now he could prevent children from dying, though he knew he'd end up in Hell one day all the same.//
How could anyone be anything but bomb-proofed after all this time?
For the past six years he had lived with the constant reminder of his demonic curse, the strange flickering of things not really there in the corner of his vision, the cold sensation of youryoku trickling down his spine – ample fodder for the paranoid mind.
//"What's that?" he asked, his voice cracked from lack of use and lack of moisture, because his muscles weren't quite strong enough to let him sit up in bed and get the damn glass of water himself, not since he had torn his stitches for the second time. He closed his eyes, felt the burn of exhaustion, opened them again, but the lights were there all the same, a misty glow that peered in through the window by the door like a hesitant sun.
"What's what?" Gojyo asked, looking up from the blade he was sharpening, but a light knock on the entrance to his home (little more than a shack, to be honest) brought him to his feet before Gonou – ah, Hakkai, he must remember that name – could restate his question.
" 'Bout time you got off your lazy ass to answer this door." He knew that voice well, had listened to it often when he had gone to Chang'An, that softly-spoken voice, whiskey-rough, that did not belong to either a monk or to such a pretty face. But this monk spoke softly and carried a big stick (yes, it was a gun, a small one actually, but the quote fit all the same), and when he came in through the door of the house (shack) there was a misty glow that surrounded him like a halo of back-lit fog. Hakkai closed his eyes, opened them, but the glow was still there. Had he seen it before, when the Three Aspects bade him kneel and accept his punishment? He couldn't remember. Was this what Christ's Heavenly Aura was supposed to look like? If it was, it certainly didn't belong around Genjo Sanzo, not just because of his Buddhist faith but because of how immoral he truly was.
The next time Sanzo visited, the aura was gone, but Hakkai sensed it all the same.//
But he had grown used to those things, learned to separate the real from the (mostly) imaginary, and now he could be awakened from a dead sleep by an assassin, dispatch said assassin, and barely have his pulse rise.
//"How rude," he said sweetly to the demon sprawled inelegantly on the floor of his bedroom. "It's not very nice to attack a sleeping target." He made a mental note to pay the inn for any damages after everything was cleaned up. After all, Houmei was such a sweet girl, despite her misplaced bias against the youkai race.//
That being said, when Goku awoke with a gasp and kicked the back of Sanzo's seat so hard that Hakuryuu gave a faint whimper, Hakkai damn near had a heart attack. He threw a jerky look over his left shoulder, gripping the wheel tightly to aid with twisting about in his seat.
Predictably, the priest immediately went for his gun. "How many times have I told you not to kick my fucking seat?!"
The boy's golden eyes were wide and unseeing for just the briefest of seconds, a look so quickly there and gone again that Hakkai wasn't even sure he saw it. It vanished behind a huge yawn and two deceptively small hands.
"Hunngnh?" Goku asked intelligently. "Are we there yet?"
Hakkai sighed softly and loosened his grip on the steering wheel, turning forward again, willing his heartbeat to slow. He knew Goku had strange sleeping habits – sometimes so soundly in the land of dreams that a bomb wouldn't wake him, other times flailing awake at the lightest of touches. Sharing a bed with the youngest of their team was usually quite painful, and Hakkai had been at the receiving end of one of those kicks more than once.
//More often than not, when he woke the boy in the morning he found him on the floor, blankets draped over the edge of the bed to trail over skinny legs and boney knees, the long brown hair in disarray over his lanky form. Goku never remembered falling out of bed, or even if he had any nightmares; at least, that's what he said when he dug into his breakfast and Hakkai mused over his morning tea. Hakkai was polite enough not to mention that he'd heard the boy crying in his sleep all the same.//
Funny. I haven't seen him wake like that in years. Not without any kind of provocation.
"Almost," he replied to Goku's fuzzy question. "Half an hour, tops, and then we'll have a roof over our heads." He pushed in the clutch and put the jeep into first gear, letting the vehicle roll down the shallow embankment.
No longer under the protective cover of the trees, the wind drove the light rain into his face, the jeep's low windshield offering little resistance. Hakkai was pleased at their progress (considering the map had shown five days to the outpost of Shanjiao; it had only taken them three), but all the same disturbed. It all seemed too soon, truthfully.
This is the last stop before Houtou Castle.
//"To the west, he says." Gojyo took one last draw on his cigarette before dropping it to the stone rocks that made up the outcropping they stood upon, hair glimmering like fresh blood in the light of the setting sun. "What's west?"
"India." Sanzo dropped his arm, squinting out across the valley they stood over, the cloth sleeves of his priestly robes effectively hiding his hands from sight. "And the three of you have to go with me."
Hakkai stood silent, arms wrapped lightly around his waist, staring past the other three, down at the river of gold that meandered towards the sun. He ignored the rapidly cooling bodies of the demons behind them, ignored the blood that was probably slipping towards them in the same manner the river was slipping towards the sun; the cliff was sloped downward towards the edge, after all. It would probably collapse sometime in the near future. Hakuryuu cooed lightly in his ear, the claws on the tips of his wings scraping against the cotton of his shirt.
Gojyo made a noise of protest. He stood closer to the edge than Hakkai. "India! To you have any idea how far away India is? Even if we left today it could take years to get there! What the hell is in India that's so important we all have to go? And who says?"
"The three heads!" Goku butted in excitedly. "There's this Gyumaoh guy in a castle in India, and an experiment, and what's causing all the demons to go all psycho-insane is–"
The wicked hiss-slap Sanzo's fan. "Would you shut up and let me explain?! And they're called the Sanbutsushin, not the three heads!"
"Owww! Sanzo, that hurt!"
"That's the point!"
Hakkai had seen it when he woke up that morning, before he had even pulled on the slippers that protected against the freezing cold concrete of the newest apartment he and Gojyo shared: a line, a thin ribbon, inconsistent and truly visible only when one tried to view it out of the corner of his eye. Once he put his monocle on, it had vanished – he had attributed it to having not had his morning dose of caffeine. But it reappeared, again and again, dancing out the door in front of him when he left to go shopping, skipping down the rutted road through the trees to school. He had ignored it when it abruptly doubled back on his way home, but learned his error quickly enough when the demons had come. It had grown from airy and nigh invisible to a strong, thick cord of light that shivered as though it anticipated something greater up ahead.
"What's this Gyumaoh thing? I thought he was just a boogey man made up to get kids indoors at night."
"Unfortunately not. Most of those fairy tales have a grain of truth in them somewhere. But Gyumaoh really did try to bring down Heaven and got killed by the War God Nataku for his efforts. Now someone's trying to revive him. We have to go stop that revival."
"...and if your friends jumped off a cliff, would you do it, too?"
"I'll throw you off this cliff if you don't take this a little more seriously!"
Hakkai didn't need to take off his monocle or close his good eye in order to see the line now, fluidly curving down the cliff and following the edge of the river. It was visible even miles away, even where the glow of the sun was truly too bright to see anything past.
The line was going west.//
"Ah, great. I'm starving!"
"Oh, like that's anything new. If I had a hundred yen for every time you said that, I'd never have to gamble for a living again."
"Bite me!"
"Do you two ever shut up?!"
Are we even ready for this?
//Shuei screamed, his hands tightened into claws, the sinews standing out under the flesh, his head thrown back to the raining skies. Hakkai's hands were red with blood, Sanzo's robes were red with blood, and no matter how hard the rain came down to wash the red away, more blood welled up to take its place. His hands were not shaking, but at the same time he could not seem to keep them still.//
//"Do me a favor, and don't reopen that wound we worked so hard to close." Hakkai lowered his gaze from the priest, half-turning to walk back out the door. "I'd really hate for you and I to be left with the same scar."
Sanzo was silent behind him.//
Despite his cheerful face, despite his outgoing optimism, Hakkai had enough doubts about himself and his position in this mission from the gods to sink a boat. He and the others had come a long way – not just in time and mileage, but in physical and emotional endurance as well. No matter how strong their adversaries were, invariably he and his allies found a way to bring them down. Sure, there had been some close calls, but Lady Luck – or the Merciful Goddess, take your pick – hadn't dropped them out of her favor. Yet.
And even with all their victories, there was still one man they had yet to defeat.
//It wasn't often that such a serious look came over the boy's face. It was easy to forget that he was really over five hundred years old, that he was the one locked away inside a mountain for doing something horrible in Heaven, that he was just as much a creature of folk-tales and legend as Gyumaoh himself. But sometimes that look would come into his eye, so much more mature than he usually acted, so old, and when that light appeared Hakkai wondered at just who he used to be.
"I know he's stronger than I am," Goku said, his fists clenching around the fabric of the blanket thrown over him. He had been out for almost a full day, and Hakkai wondered if he even felt the pain from where he was so viciously kneed in the stomach. If he hadn't been Goku, he probably would have ended up with internal bleeding. "But next time I see him... I promise I won't lose again."//
Homura, the Prince of War. If we can't even stand toe-to-toe with a half god, then how can we expect to subdue Gyumaoh if he is resurrected before we make it to Houtou Castle?
The path leveled out beneath them, and Hakkai shifted up one more gear. Up ahead the mountains loomed ominously, thrusting up from the ground like so many broken bones. The mountain in the fore in particular – the holy mountain – had set his teeth on edge before he'd even caught sight of it. He was tired, and the flickering of phantom power was intruding on his vision even though he was not focusing through his bad eye. He did not know what he would see if he took off his monocle and really looked at the mountain. He was not sure he wanted to.
"Oh, come on, Sanzo! It's getting dark, and I haven't had anything to eat since lunchti—"
Hakkai looked up into the rearview mirror at the strange hitch in Goku's voice, tightening his hands on the wheel as the jeep bucked on the slick path. Gojyo had glanced at him in curiosity as well, but the boy ignored everything around him, his golden eyes fixated before them, wide and unblinking despite the wind-driven rain.
Goku's throat moved as he swallowed heavily. "Why... why didn't you..."
Gojyo rolled his eyes and reached into his jacket, no doubt going for his cigarettes, and grimaced when he pulled them out of the interior pocket. They looked like they were even more wet than the red-head. "Spit it out, monkey boy. You keeping saying you're not stupid, but you sure do sound it right about now."
"Shut up!" The vehemence in the boy's voice earned a true look backwards, rather than a glance snuck through a mirror, but Goku did the work for him, lunging forward and latching onto Sanzo's headrest. "Why the hell didn't you tell me we were coming here?!"
//Hakkai looked up from the map spread out on the table, one side of which desperately wanted to part ways with the wood and was being held down by a well-used ashtray. He gripped his coffee mug tighter than necessary. "We should tell Goku, then."
"No." The blonde priest's voice was calm, but the slight emphasis on the word – easily dismissible by someone who did not know him, but hitting home like a sledgehammer for Hakkai – indicated that his decision would not be swayed. "If we tell Goku now, we'll have to deal with his moaning and griping all the way to Shanjiao. Better to deal with the angst when we get there and get it over with quickly." He moved the ashtray and began to roll the map back up.
Hakkai lowered his eyes to his hands, to the coffee that was quickly becoming cold, and tried very hard not to hate Sanzo in that instant, even if the priest did think he was doing it for the boy's own good.
"As you wish," he said simply.//
"You didn't need to know," Sanzo said simply, neither looking back at the monkey currently clinging to his seat or raising his voice.
"The hell I didn't need to know! That's a bullshit answer and you know it!" Goku all but threw himself back into his seat. Hakkai didn't need to look into the mirror to know what his expression was – his arms crossed petulantly over his chest, one of his rare frowns clouding his young features, lower lip dangling dangerously near the range of 'pouting'. "God you suck!"
"Took you long enough to figure that out, shrimp," Gojyo said airily. "But what's the issue with the town? What happened to 'Oh god, there's a town, maybe they have a ramen shop, feed me, I'm starving to death'?"
Here was as good as any place to butt in.
"The mountain, Gojyo," Hakkai said. "That's Mount Gogyo, the mountain of Buddha's five fingers."
//" – and then Buddha pinned him to Earth and stuck a mountain on top of him!" The young girl beamed up at Hakkai, oblivious to the embarrassed look on the face of her older sister. "See, I know even more than Peide!"
Hakkai smiled down at her, shifting his pile of books to the other arm. "That's very good, Liling. When you come into school next year you will do very well. I'm sure you'll do your sister proud."
Peide took the young girl's arm, a faint blush rising on her cheeks. "Yeah, sure. Sorry to bother you when you're on your errands, sensei. Gomen nasai..."
"It's no problem at all," he replied politely. "Have a nice day." He half-turned to go before Peide could even reply, adjusting the books again. They were not heavy, merely awkward, and he needed to let Goku know that –
Behind him stood Goku, one hand resting on the pole that held up the store-front's awning, his pupils so wide that the gold of his iris was just a thin band of light. He had gone pale enough that he probably should have passed out, and Hakkai could just barely see the he was trembling. Had he been standing there the entire time Liling told her story? Hakkai wondered.
"Goku?" he asked hesitantly.
Goku blinked, and then turned and ran – no, fled – down the street, leaving clouds of dust and startled customers in his wake.//
"So? I didn't come along on this trip for the scenery, y'know."
Sometimes, Gojyo can be so delightfully dense. This is not one of those times. He sighed, and deliberately gentled his tone – more so than normal, anyways. "That is where Goku was imprisoned for five hundred years."
Silence, then, an uncomfortable one that spoke of a tension rarely found in their group. Hakkai expected it. Goku was understandably upset – who could easily forget the punishment of half a millennia? – and Gojyo was actually empathic enough to know when to shut his mouth, even if he didn't often act like it. And Hakkai... he didn't like this, not one bit. It felt underhanded, almost sneaky; what if it had been him, what if it had been the ruins of Hyakuganmao's castle they were traveling to? The likelihood of him becoming unhinged merely at the sight of that place, had he arrived upon it with no prior warning, was almost guaranteed.
//"You didn't need to know."//
Goku is a remarkably stable person, even with his memory loss. Especially with his memory loss; who knows just what he did to warrant five hundred years of punishment? But he has his own fears, like the rest of us – he just buries them so deeply that they rarely see the light of day.
No one spoke, letting the wind and the rain and the sounds of their passage fill the silence. Hakkai chanced a glance to his left, taking in the monk's profile; Sanzo's eyes were narrowed against the rain, water dripping from the ends of his bedraggled hair and beading on the embossed surface of the Maten scripture as though the paper were oiled. As usual, there was no expression on his face, although Hakkai did suspect he saw a frown hovering at the edges of Sanzo's mouth.
//"Am I useless? Tell me the truth, Hakkai! Am I really so useless?"//
He sighed heavily through his nose, directing his attention back to the road. Mount Gogyo seemed positively enormous at this angle, and with every spin of the tire it seemed to get larger. Hakkai wasn't so sure the others could sense this weird presence – almost as though the very rocks were alive and watching them – but it sure as hell gave him the creeps.
I don't think I could sleep tonight, even without the rain. This place reeks of power, and I can't tell whether it's malignant or benign.
The sooner we leave this place behind, the better.
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[A/N:
First off, the spoilers in Hakkai's memories:
1) The first memory has to do with Hakkai surviving the massacre on Hyakuganmaoh's castle.
2/3) The second and third have to do with the three years he spent with Gojyo afterward, and the three years they have spent on the road so far (according to me).
4) The fourth memory does not occur in the anime or manga. That one is all me.
5) The fifth memory is based on the manga account of the spider demon attack. This is also in the second episode of the manga.
6) The sixth memory does not occur in the anime or the manga. This is one that would occur during Painting by Number, if I ever get around to writing it. The information will be alluded to later on, don't worry.
7) The seventh memory occurs immediately after the four get together in the beginning, and Sanzo points dramatically into the sunset, yadda yadda west. This happens in the first episode of the anime and the first chapter of the manga. The memory itself, contained in the story, does not occur. That's all me.
8/9) The eighth and ninth memories occur during the Shuei arc, based on anime episodes six and seven.
10) This memory is based on the anime episode 34, after Homura beats the shit outta Goku.
11) This one occurs immediately before the story begins, and does not occur in the anime or manga.
12) The twelfth memory would occur during the Painting by Numbers fiction, if I ever get around to it. Any information needed from that fiction will be included in here, no worries.
13) A direct quote from Sanzo in this scene.
14) I can't tell you who said it, but it came from Painting by Numbers. Wow, I really should get off my ass and write that fic, huh?
15) Well, this isn't a memory, but the six-month-period Gojyo keeps referring to also happened in Painting by Numbers. Just so you're not confused. Even though I'm sure you are. Don't worry, it'll all be explained later on.
Thank you's go out to:
keistje: I'm glad you like it! I was kinda planning for my summary to be a bit of a hook as well. I hope I update often enough to keep you happy. -!
Nihon5yr: I was a little leery about using the name without getting proper consultation, but no one would respond to me! I really appreciate your suggestion, and could I possibly ask you to help with the other names I plan on using in the future? Or point me out to someone who would? It would be great if you could!
Merf: Yeah, I know it's kinda weird at this point, but that's what I was aiming for. A hook, if you will, that'll end up getting explained later on in the fiction. I hope I don't confuse you any more along the line.
Thanks so much for the reviews you guys! I hope you enjoy this chapter as well.]
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