The clock read two-thirty.
And yet, at that hour of the morning when anyone with any common sense was asleep, the television was playing its light through a darkened living room, silhouetting the figure that was slumped alone on the couch in white radiance balanced with the shadows of night.
It was that light that allowed him to see the tears that streaked her cheeks, but the shadow that hid anymore than that evidence of the girl's distress.
Sano closed the bathroom door silently behind him, shivering slightly as the cool air from the hallway rushed over his bare chest. Grateful he had decided to slip his jeans back on rather than scoot out here naked, he stood motionless for a few seconds, staring at the girl who apparently was too wrapped up in her emotions to notice he was there.
A few months ago, he would have been hesitant to interfere. It would have been none of his business, and she probably wouldn't have welcomed his concern. But... somehow, things were different now... and he was glad for that.
he called softly through the darkness. Why're you up?
Kaoru jumped visibly at his voice, a hand flashing to wipe at her eyes and cheeks, frantically trying to hide the tears. I-I couldn't sleep, I- Her voice broke, and she huddled into the couch as though trying to hide herself from his gaze. D-don't worry about it, it's nothing-
'Jou-chan, you're crying, he broke in sternly, padding across the carpet in bare feet to sit lightly on the rumpled couch next to her. Don't go an' tell me nothin's wrong. Come on, huh?
The younger girl shook her head, rubbing at her eyes with one knuckle. she protested weakly. I- I just-
Sano reached out and took hold of one of her thin shoulders, shaking her gently. You what?
She trembled violently beneath his touch, then lifted plaintive blue eyes to meet his. Her pretty face was flushed and streaked with tears, lips trembling, eyes puffy from crying far too hard and too long. she forced out, voice cracking. How can you be... how can you be so comfortable with-... with...
Sano blinked, not comprehending for a long moment, then squeezed her shoulder tightly. With what? he queried uncertainly. I don't get what you mean.
Kaoru shook her head and looked down, refusing to meet his eyes. Her body shook, and he could hear her struggling to breathe deeply. Something in that rattling breath ached deep inside him, and Sano grabbed her close, hugging the girl tightly to his naked chest, rocking her back and forth slightly and stroking her hair lightly like a little child. She shuddered in his arms, then a long track of wetness marked his skln as she began to cry softly against him.
How can you be so comfortable with who you are? she whimpered against his shoulder. With- with being- being- different- different from everybody and knowing that so many people hate you without even kn-knowing you- just because... just because you... How can you be happy when so many people hate you?!
Sano stilled his hand against her hair, struggling to understand what those words meant, what on Earth she was talking about... What could she-
Oh.
Oh.
Dammit, he had been right. Why did he always have to be right when it was so inconvenient for everybody? Dammit, dammit, dammit...
he said softly, you mean because I'm gay, right?
She nodded silently against his chest, refusing to lift her head again.
Sano exhaled slowly, carefully trying to figure out an answer. He resumed petting down her bed-tousled hair, breathing softly to reassure her, like a little child...
Because I'm me, he said simply, unable to think of any other way to say it. There was a time when I couldn't really accept it, y'know... but I guess there's no use in beating myself up over something that's impossible to change. And I guess, too, it makes it easier having people around who don't mind. It's just the way I am, and anyone who can't accept who I am isn't worthy of my time. I wanna be able to wake up in the morning and see myself in the mirror, not some shield I make so no one can hurt me.
Kaoru was silent for a long while, then she shifted a little to look up at him. You... you don't care what anybody thinks of you? she whispered, brow furrowed.
Sano blinked down at her, then smiled a little. Sure I care, he refuted. I care what you think of me. And your sister, and your dad. But anybody who's not gonna take any time is useless as far as I'm concerned. And... He felt his face grow more serious. I'm not sayin' it doesn't hurt when somebody you've never seen before in your life passes you in the hallway and calls you a faggot. It hurts every time, but some things are more important, I guess.
It's just not fair! she burst out, thumping a fist soundly against his chest. Sano jumped. It's not fair that people just can't see you for who you are! It's not like you chose some horrible deviant lifestyle, you're just different, and that's not bad, why should it be bad?! It's just not fair!!
Sano caught her hand, locking his gaze with hers. Kaoru blinked, then fell quiet, a sudden vulnerability shadowing her face.
she whispered shakily.
You don't have to be afraid, he said gently, squeezing her fist in his larger one. Look, I know it's hard to deal with at first. But it gets easier once you can accept it. And God knows no one's gonna look down on you, in this family. We'll all be here for you.
Her eyes wavered, and her lips parted as though she were about to question him, but then she relaxed with a tiny smile. Of course you'd know, she whispered, but the bitterness implied was completely absent from her voice. But... Sanosuke... Misao, she tries, but I don't think she really understands, completely... and
Hasn't accepted it himself, Sano completed with a sad smile. Yeah, I know. But, listen, whenever you need me, you know I'm gonna be here...
I know... Kaoru smiled, if just a little. Sanosuke... I know... but...
he completed with a grin, hugging her a little. He softened, cuddling the girl close. 'Jou-chan, I'm always gonna be here. Cause... I know it doesn't make much sense, but I feel like... I dunno, I guess, I've always felt like...
Kaoru watched him silently, her eyes sparkling uncertainly.
You're my little girl, he whispered. Because you're my little girl.
With those words, a bright smile broke over her trembling lips, and Kaoru hugged him tightly. She didn't say a word, but Sano could feel her body calm as he hugged her back, rocking her gently.
His little girl.

*** *** ***

It was somewhat of a relief.
Actually, it was much more than that... She felt as though she could breathe again, a little easier now, the release of knowing someone knew, and she could still feel safe... She didn't have to worry about it alone anymore, torture herself in the depths of the night wondering and denying...
But still, there was that feeling...
Kaoru tapped her pencil against her book, distracted from the poem she was supposed to be reading. It was a Cummings... and though she did like those, this one wasn't connecting in her mind. Sometimes obscure lines made perfect sense. Other times they were just so much nonsense.
One day anyone died I guess... and no one stopped to kiss his face...
Kaoru jumped at the soft voice from next to her, then blinked over at the boy who sat across the small aisle from her. Anthony was pouring over the poem, dark brow furrowed, lips moving as he read it aloud softly, lost in his concentration.
She watched him for a little while more, admiring his countenance enviously. Anthony was one of the more intelligent people she had ever met, always struggling to attain the best grades possible in any class. He was juggling three advanced placement courses, not an easy task for anyone, as well as keeping up membership in the both the football team and the Key Club. And speaking the best French out of anyone in their class. He probably knew this poem inside and out by now.
Suddenly the dark-haired boy jumped, his quick eyes flitting over to her. Kaoru blinked again, then pointed at the book and shrugged, fixing a pained expression on her face. He smiled faintly, rolling his eyes in answer, then returned to staring fixedly at the lines.
The room fell back to studious silence for a good fifteen minutes before the door across the room rattled as a fist pounded at it. A collective jump and gasp echoed throughout the class, then someone giggled nervously, and the sudden tension broke, everyone shaking with laughter. The tall blond girl who sat by the door leaned over with a sigh and wrenched the handle open.
A boy poked his head in, then entered the room. He carried a few papers stapled at the top carelessly in one hand, the other shoved in a deep jeans pocket.
Anthony jumped at his entry, one hand falling to cover his English book in what almost seemed like anxiety. The tall, gangly boy flicked a glance in his direction, then grinned and lifted the hand holding the papers, mouthing a cheery
These are from in-school, he informed their teacher, leaning forward and handing her the papers.
Kaoru stared at the messenger in perplexity. She'd never seen him before... At least, she was fairly sure she hadn't. He was tall, thinly muscled, with tall spikes of blond hair decorating his scalp. His eyes were bright, active, lips seeming constantly twisted in a half-smirk, half- cheerful smile. A soccer player, most likely.
The blond boy bounced his way back towards the door, pausing a moment to lean down by Anthony's desk, take a quick glance at the book, grin mischievously and punch his shoulder. Anthony blinked up at him, then smiled a little, an expression that was sadly rare across his face.
Go to class, he suggested softly.
The bright-eyed teenager laughed and sauntered out the door.
Kaoru stared after him, puzzled, then let her eyes fall back to the dark-haired boy who sat across the aisle from her. Who's that? she asked softly, leaning a little towards him, curious for reasons she didn't take the time to examine.
he said succintly. Joe Richards.
Kaoru shrugged, accepting that, then returned to her reading with a sigh. She was going to have to do this tonight... Everything about this poem was refusing to connect in her mind. She was too hungry... maybe she'd be able to concentrate better after lunch, but they were going to do a preliminary discussion of what the class thought it meant then. And save the personal interpretation for homework. They were supposed to be doing that now, but true to form, no one was.
How about we talk about this for a while? Mrs. Jackson suggested with a quirk of one dark eyebrow, standing up from behind her desk. We can finish it up after lunch, but I think I'm seeing enough blank stares to know some of us are completely lost.
There was a murmuring of general consensus from about the room, and she sat down at a free desk. I know Cummings can be hard to stomach sometimes, she offered sympathetically. But does anyone have an idea of what a possible idea of this could be?
The resulting silence was broken by a quiet cough, then a deep voice.
No one loves anyone, Anthony said abruptly. By picking those names for the main characters, Cummings is saying that people just go about their meaningless lives without caring about those who are different, like it says is. No one loves anyone, and so there's no real feeling or emotion about anything. No one cares.
Something uncomfortably tight clenched about her heart as she watched the boy who sat next to her. His long fingers were curled into a fist, trembling against the edge of his thick English book, his voice so rigidly controlled that it seemed it would break any moment. He seemed... angry...?
The bell rang in that instant, and the room exploded into motion as books were shoved into backpacks, lunches were pulled free of the mass of textbooks already there, and all inhabitants poured through the door and into the hallway. Kaoru found herself at the back of the rough line, and scowled with frustration as her stomach grumbled. This was not the day to make her wait for lunch.
As she made her way into the crowded hallway, two voices made themselves evident above the clamour. They were laughing roughly, speaking in short bursts and making their way towards her.
Kaoru sighed and leaned against the wall, staying out of the way and waiting for Sanosuke. He was laughing at something his companion had said, shoving at him with one hand while carrying his backpack with the other. It was that blond... Joe RIchards, Anthony had said. Apparently, Sanosuke knew him too. It did make sense... He seemed like someone the boisterous senior would know.
Oi, Sanosuke called, waving his free arm cheerfully. Kaoru sighed, but smiled obligingly and made her way across the hallway to his side. He switched his backpack to one strong shoulder and draped an arm casually over her, squeezing her close in a quick half-embrace.
Joe leaned over and grinned at her. he said brightly. You're in Tony's class, huh? Damn geniuses, right, Sagara?
Yeah, yeah. Too smart fer your own good, missy, Sanosuke warned playfully, mussing up her hair. Gonna bite ya on th' ass one day.
How, in getting a decent job after I graduate from college? she asked dryly, peering up at them. Joe was tall, too... Why was everyone but Misao taller than her?
I think she just insulted you, the blond said innocently, prodding Sanosuke.
Shuddup, you- oh, look, there's Anthony. Go catch im an' leave me alone, punk. Sanosuke shoved the other boy in Anthony's general direction, and Joe obediently stumbled off.
Hey, Tony, waitasecond, wouldya?!
Kaoru smiled up at Sanosuke, nudging at his chest with her head. I didn't know you knew him, she offered.
Aa. E's in a bunch a my classes. NIce kid. Sanosuke grinned down at her. And as for you, jou-chan, are you feelin' better t'day? You look pretty happy.
Kaoru cast her eyes to the tile and nodded, heart swelling suddenly in her thin breast. she said softly. I... I am feeling a lot better. Thanks for... for listening to me this morning, Sanosuke. I... I guess I just needed someone to understand.
Sanosuke's arm tightened around her back, drawing her reassuringly close. I know, he said softly. It's hard, at first... For a while, it was all I thought about, over and over, but after some time... I don't even think about it anymore, really. Even... HIs voice dropped even further, enough that Kaoru had to struggle to hear him. Even every day, when I'm with your tou-san, I don't think about it... It's just... the way things are, and it doesn't even seem strange until something reminds me. So I guess... I guess what I'm sayin' is you'll get used to yourself after some time. And it's all gonna be fine.
she repeated softly. I'm glad.
They walked along in comfortable silence for a moment, then Kaoru summoned the last bits of her courage and peered up at him.
Were you surprised? she asked shyly.
Sano blinked warm dark eyes down at her, then smiled and shook his head. he answered kindly. Not at all. I figured, actually... I was just a little startled that I was right, s all.
You figured? Kaoru glared at him.
Sanosuke blinked, obviously confused, then grinned and shook her a little. Calm down, girl. It's not like you radiate it or anything. It's just... I dunno, how you reacted to a couple a things I said, and the way you act around the kitsune, and stuff like that...
Kaoru furrowed her brow, nudging his side in bafflement. What on Earth are you talking about, Sanosuke?
He laughed, then shook his head quickly. Sorry. That nurse lady, Meg. I just- I dunno.
Kaoru stared at him, then sighed and shrugged. You worry me, she said dryly, then focused her attention on descending the stairs while not tripping over either Sanosuke or herself. It would be embarrassing enough to fall on her own, let along dragging poor Sanosuke along with her. Besides, he'd probably crush her.
I worry you? the dark-haired teenager repeated with mock surprise. Why, jou-chan! I'm glad you think so highly of me to worry! Somebody so stupid and galumphy as me-
SHUT UP OR I WILL THROW YOU DOWN THE STAIRS RIGHT NOW!!!!

Kaoru said brightly, thrusting a brown bag into his hands.
Sano stared down at the paper bag in silent perplexity, trying to find a comfortable way to sit on the stupid bench. Why the administration had decided to make them sit at table-bench combinations like elementary school was beyond him. All he knew was that his legs didn't fit beneath the table, and he was going to have bruises on his knees. Normally, that never would have bothered him... but if Kenshin saw him all bruised up he'd worry, and then he'd fret over him for hours...
What's this for? he asked stupidly.
It's your lunch, the younger girl advised him with endless patience. Eat it. Tou-san made it for you this morning and I picked it up with mine when you left it at the house.
I didn't know he- Sano stared at the simple, crinkled bag, unreasonable tears beginning to swell in the corners of his stinging eyes. Kenshin had made him a lunch...
There was a brief silence, then a heavy sigh from across the table. Kaoru shook her head in faint exasperation and opened her own, tearing into the prepared lunch with a ferocity he'd only seen equally on animal documentaries and Yahiko eating anything meat-related.
Sano pulled gingerly at the folded top, unwilling to rip it and almost afraid to open it. No one had ever made him a lunch before... Katsu had given him extras from his own lunch before, and he'd bought a pre-made lunch sometimes when he'd had extra money, but... This was too much, far too much.
He peered at the contents, taking each little bag out and laying it carefully on the tabletop. A sandwich, cut carefully into two little triangles... Something wrapped in aluminum foil, probably a soda of some sort... Cookies, probably some of the ones Kenshin had made two nights before... One of the brownies... Even a little napkin... With something written on it...
Sano blinked owlishly and unfolded the white napkin, then peered at the meticulously drawn characters. It read, very simply, Aishiteru... Kenshin.'
He felt his lower lip tremble, and Sano bit down on it firmly. He didn't need to burst into tears in the middle of lunch. Not like he hadn't before, but at least he'd had a decent reason the last time. It was stupid to cry over one word, something he'd heard from Kenshin's own lips many times before...
He was started from tearful daze by the heavy thump of a tray next to the jou-chan, as well as the bench next to him shaking as two more bodies wedged their ways in. Misao waved at him cheerily from where she now sat next to her sister, and Katsu gave him a silent nod before Kelsey attached firmly to his arm again on the other side.
What's it say on the napkin? Misao queried the instant before hs emade a quick snatch for it.
Sano recoiled, then hid it in his pocket with a growl as Katsu leaned over unassumingly. Don't you people have anything better to do? he protested.
What, than interfere in your personal life? Have we ever? Kelsey responded innocently.
The entire table dissolved into laughter as each fought to dig the little note from his pocket.

Kaoru slid her hands into her jeans pockets, peering up at the ceiling. That was the first time she had met Sanosuke's friends... They seemed to be nice people. Misao had told her that the long-haired Nihonjin, Katsuhiro, was in her Spanish class... And Kelsey was apparently his girlfriend. There was no question that the two of them knew about Sanosuke and his relationship with her tou-san, as comment after comment about that napkin had been dropped about every two minutes all the way through lunch.
It was good he didn't have to hide it from everyone, she supposed... but still, it couldn't be ignored that the more people who knew meant the more people who could accidentally disclose it to someone who shouldn't know. And she knew they wouldn't do it on purpose... but that didn't mean it couldn't happen. Just someone passing by the lunch table could overhear... and that would be disastrous.
But she didn't need to worry about that now.
Kaoru smiled to herself, remembering the tears that had shimmered in Sanosuke's dark eyes as he had held the simple brown bag lunch in his strong hands. He was like a little boy, sometimes... And though it was more than a little sad he had suffered enough neglect to react so strongly to such a small gesture, it was also comforting to know he wouldn't be suffering it any longer...
They were all together now.
All of them... They were a family. They had been a family before, tou-san and Misao and herself, but... there had been something missing that she had never noticed until... well, until Sanosuke and Yahiko had moved in with them, and tou-san and Sanosuke had fallen in love. There was something more complete about them now. And it felt nice.
It felt nice, to know that she could go to him when she needed comfort... that when tou-san needed someone to take care of him, he had someone he was able to be weak with... Tou-san had always been there for them, but when he needed to be held, when he need someone to tell him that everything was going to be all right, no one had been there. Because he refused to let her and Misao when he was in pain.
So now... Now they all had someone. And they all had each other.