The Time Between
A Lupin/ Tonks Fanfiction
As always, theses characters, plots, settings, and most everything else belongs to J.K. Rowlings.
*~ ~ ~ ~ ~ *
Chapter III: Lupin's Home
As Lupin entered his home at a quarter past midnight, it felt even lonely than usual. The empty chairs of a kitchen table that once held a laughing family of four glowed ghost- like in the moonlight; his mother's oven that had once never stopped with the baking of buttered scones and sweetmeats, cold for over ten years and his father's favorite leather chair vacant, now guarded by a crotchety old cat, who had once been the old man's cherished familiar.
Tonight, the sadness that he had tried so violently to suppress pushed against his chest and he knew it was her fault. It was her fault for bring such strong emotions, passions that he tried to keep still, so close to the surface of his heart.
"Damn her kiss!" His cursed the blackness.
Crumpling to his knees in the kitchen, he began to cry. Red veins straining in his neck, "And damn you Sirius for coming back!!"
Then, in his mind, he cursed Sirius once again for giving him hope. As sobs racked his body, cracked his chest and tears streaked his stubbed face, he damned Sirius for loving him and for making him think that he was worthy of being loved.
Yet, a man's fraternal love for his brother is no where near the same as a woman's Eros for her lover. How could he have been so stupid to have fallen for Nymphadora! He was safe with Sirius, once again accepted into the bosom of true friendship, but somehow, she too had been there; slowly blurring the lines between his mind and his heart; tangling the boundaries of friendship and desire.
Holding his face in his hands, he cried softly now; tears dripping from his fingers to the stone floor. Remus rocked on his knees, paying penance to those who died too young, too alive. Openly mourning the death of a childhood friend for the second time in his short life, Lupin grieved with as much conviction and sincerity as he had mourned for James, Peter, and Lily, and with as much anger and disgust as when Sirius had gone to Azkaban some fifteen years ago, leaving him alone the first time.
Amidst the ruble of his broken heart, a new image slowly appeared; a woman with pink hair and a gentle smile. Although he continually tried to push her picture from his conscious mind, she continue to haunt his dreams and tonight the memory of her passionate kiss, her sincere smile, mended his heart with the thinnest, most delicate thread of love. He hated her for saving him from Malfoy's curse during the Ministry battle, and for kissing him tonight so enthusiastically because it hurt, it all hurt: living and loving. And Nymphadora Tonks made him hurt, because she made him want to live and she made him want to love.
"Oh Nymphadora," he sighed wiping away the last of his tears against his sleeve. Her name a mantra on his thin lips, he said it several more times before found enough courage to pull himself from the cold stone floor and up to his bed; willing himself on to tomorrow; willing himself to hope...
*~ ~ ~ ~ ~*
Sorry this was so short, but I want to keep each chapter to its own location. Please R&R!
A Lupin/ Tonks Fanfiction
As always, theses characters, plots, settings, and most everything else belongs to J.K. Rowlings.
*~ ~ ~ ~ ~ *
Chapter III: Lupin's Home
As Lupin entered his home at a quarter past midnight, it felt even lonely than usual. The empty chairs of a kitchen table that once held a laughing family of four glowed ghost- like in the moonlight; his mother's oven that had once never stopped with the baking of buttered scones and sweetmeats, cold for over ten years and his father's favorite leather chair vacant, now guarded by a crotchety old cat, who had once been the old man's cherished familiar.
Tonight, the sadness that he had tried so violently to suppress pushed against his chest and he knew it was her fault. It was her fault for bring such strong emotions, passions that he tried to keep still, so close to the surface of his heart.
"Damn her kiss!" His cursed the blackness.
Crumpling to his knees in the kitchen, he began to cry. Red veins straining in his neck, "And damn you Sirius for coming back!!"
Then, in his mind, he cursed Sirius once again for giving him hope. As sobs racked his body, cracked his chest and tears streaked his stubbed face, he damned Sirius for loving him and for making him think that he was worthy of being loved.
Yet, a man's fraternal love for his brother is no where near the same as a woman's Eros for her lover. How could he have been so stupid to have fallen for Nymphadora! He was safe with Sirius, once again accepted into the bosom of true friendship, but somehow, she too had been there; slowly blurring the lines between his mind and his heart; tangling the boundaries of friendship and desire.
Holding his face in his hands, he cried softly now; tears dripping from his fingers to the stone floor. Remus rocked on his knees, paying penance to those who died too young, too alive. Openly mourning the death of a childhood friend for the second time in his short life, Lupin grieved with as much conviction and sincerity as he had mourned for James, Peter, and Lily, and with as much anger and disgust as when Sirius had gone to Azkaban some fifteen years ago, leaving him alone the first time.
Amidst the ruble of his broken heart, a new image slowly appeared; a woman with pink hair and a gentle smile. Although he continually tried to push her picture from his conscious mind, she continue to haunt his dreams and tonight the memory of her passionate kiss, her sincere smile, mended his heart with the thinnest, most delicate thread of love. He hated her for saving him from Malfoy's curse during the Ministry battle, and for kissing him tonight so enthusiastically because it hurt, it all hurt: living and loving. And Nymphadora Tonks made him hurt, because she made him want to live and she made him want to love.
"Oh Nymphadora," he sighed wiping away the last of his tears against his sleeve. Her name a mantra on his thin lips, he said it several more times before found enough courage to pull himself from the cold stone floor and up to his bed; willing himself on to tomorrow; willing himself to hope...
*~ ~ ~ ~ ~*
Sorry this was so short, but I want to keep each chapter to its own location. Please R&R!