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Did I confuse some of you? Sorry. Hermione is being raped by Smith, and no matter what Snape thinks at the moment, she doesn't do that voluntary! Ok? just don't forget that. Thanks.
erm, on with the story, though that Chapter is a rather boring one, only what Snape's thinking. I like writing about Snape a lot, the main part of this story will be from his point of view of the events. Another reason for that is that it's very difficult to write about someone who is being raped, or a rapist himself if you can not fully understand them. But I will try to do more stuff of Hermione too, so that you will know what she really thinks and stuff…

Thanks to Mystery ReclatS for the great job of my beta-reader! (and that's not easy, I tell you…)

-§-- 5. Misgivings --§-

Professor Snape, Potions Master of Hogwarts, let himself drop on his armchair in front of his fireplace.

He was confused. That day was definitely one of his worst days in life. And that might say something, because he had plenty of those.

He had always hated Smith. The fact that he was the new Defence Against the Dark Arts teacher would be enough reason for Snape to dislike him.

Smith was young, even younger than him, and he had been the youngest teacher of Hogwarts for quite a time now. Smith was handsome, something which Severus Snape never was, but looks have never been for any importance to Snape.

The students liked him and that made Snape hate the teacher more than anything else.

Of course, Snape had never been liked by his students. In fact, not even the teachers could stand his bad temper and his "the-earth-is-going-to-crash-down-on-us" mood.

Somehow, it still was hurtful that the man who took the DADA job had also seemingly taken the minds of his female students. He often watched how they threw longing glances on the staff table.

He had also noticed that Hermione Granger was not one of them, though it wasn't as if he cared for that reason.

And now… he deeply loathed the man.

How could he be able to assault someone like Hermione?

Such a smart girl, clever, but still naïve. Hermione always seemed unaffected by the war that was going on outside, even though she did so much more than other students for the good side.

She still laughed with her best friends and she still cared for her studies more than for her life, it seemed. She always saw the good things in a person, and never gave up; knowing the solution to every problem would be in a book found in the library.

She seemed so untouched - so pure.

Snape chuckled at the thought. He, Severus Snape, one of those who still thought that muggle-born people are less worth than pure-bloods, thought that Hermione, whose parents were both muggles, was pure.

But the Hermione he thought he knew would never open her clothes in front of a teacher. Also, she would never cut her arms, because she knew from all the books that it wouldn't be good.

But still, Hermione had done it.

And the reason was her DADA teacher, and his hands in her robes.

'Damn, I can't get that picture out of my head!' Snape thought angrily.

He didn't want to imagine what would have happened if he hadn't gone inside that room. He remembered that Hermione didn't seem to defend herself.

That was maybe why he didn't ask Smith what that was about.

Hermione didn't seem surprised, or shocked, that her teacher was trying to touch her.

She seemed uncomfortable and helpless.

'It wasn't the first time', he assumed

But what if not? When did it start? And who did it start with?

He needed to know. Was Hermione really the one who offered it to him?

'No, she wouldn't. She would never.'

But then, he couldn't be sure.

What was first? Sleeping with her teacher or changing her character?

How could he know? And what should he do?

If he told Dumbledore, and it was her, she would be in trouble.

'And since when is that bad?'

Yeah, since when did he care? She was one of the Gryffindors he hated so much. Since when didn't he want to see one of them in trouble?

'Now WHO has changed, huh?'

Professor Snape banged his head down on his table and roared in frustration.

He could question himself throughout the whole night, and there would be no answers.

Not until he asked one of them.

Severus Snape looked at his watch and found that it was 3 o'clock in the morning. He decided that he had to wait until tomorrow to get some answers.

He changed into his night clothes and laid himself in his bed.

He was tired. But he couldn't take his mind off of the evening.

What if he had taken the offer?

His stomach twitched at the thought of it.

No. He wasn't like that pervert DADA teacher, who enjoyed the fact that some kids would do everything to do the same things that Hermione had to do.

He didn't take any other kid. He didn't want an affair. It wasn't the same sadistic game if his victim would be willing to.

'What's really confusing me is that she didn't say it was him, as if it wasn't obvious. Now, what if it really wasn't him?'

He slammed his fist into his pillow. How should he know?

If it had been her, then she wouldn't have looked as helpless and uncomfortable as she did. But maybe she hadn't been good enough at DADA and thought she could fix some things…

'-You're thinking bullshit right now. Hermione Granger? Not good at anything? Doubtful.'

"I have to talk to her…"

-§-

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