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A/N: Thanks again to everyone who's given feedback and encouragement. If you've been reading and enjoying but not reviewing (thought I couldn't see ya, huh?), please feel free to drop a line. We likes the lovely feeback!

Also, I have no idea how to go about getting a divorce in Connecticut—or any other state, for that matter. Please forgive me for the inevitable vagueness and/or inaccuracies of that part of the story.

And we're back in 5, 4, 3, 2 . . .

*******************

"Wait, wait. You said what?"

It was three days after Luke and Lorelai's big confrontation—or, as Lorelai had come to think of it, Meltdown II: Disaster in the Diner. Lorelai had spent two days holed up in her house, claiming to have the stomach flu. She'd passed those days sitting on the couch in her Barbie pajamas, alternating between doing paperwork for the inn (even the need for a wallow of epic proportions couldn't change the fact that the opening was just a few weeks away) and watching every John Hughes film she and Rory owned. She'd spoken to Rory briefly—just long enough to give her an outline of what happened, without too many of the details. Rory had wanted to come home, but she was in the middle two major projects and Lorelai had refused to let her neglect her schoolwork just to play nursemaid to her emotionally crippled mother, especially with the end of the semester coming in just a few weeks. Luckily, Lorelai didn't have to face Friday night dinners in her current emotional state. Emily had decided that all dinners should be postponed until after the Dragonfly opening so that Lorelai could devote all her attention to the inn. Lorelai was convinced this just gave Emily more time to come up with increasingly intricate ways to torture her about the opening, but she was grateful for the temporary Hartford moratorium.

On the third day of Lorelai's self-imposed exile from the world, Sookie, who had eventually figured out that Lorelai wasn't sick, but was wallowing about Something Big, came by with a huge chocolate cake and the Mary Tyler Moore Show DVD box set (she never understood why Lorelai always got to be Mary and she always had to be Rhoda.) After much probing and wheedling on Sookie's part, Lorelai told her the whole story of the kiss and her sort-of-fight with Luke. Sookie just sat at the kitchen table and listened, silent but completely wide-eyed, until Lorelai told her about her "Tropical Storm Lorelai" comment.

"But why would you say something like that to him?"

Lorelai sighed. "Oh, I don't know, maybe it's because it's the truth?"

"No, it's not!"

"C'mon, Sook, you know my track record as well as anyone. And so does Luke. He's sat there for years watching me screw up relationship after relationship, and he's too smart—and to environmentally conscious—to venture onto an emotional toxic waste dump."

"Oh, now you're just being way too hard on yourself."

"Oh, yeah? Well, let's take a poll. Let's see . . . Who in this room got pregnant before she finished high school, refused to marry her babydaddy, and took off without a word to her parents?" She raised her hand and looked around the kitchen, as if looking out over a crowd, "That's what I thought. Now. Anyone else in the audience sleep with said babydaddy—on more than one occasion—years later and keep hoping that he'd help you make a family? How many of you kept sleeping and hoping, up to—and, okay, even after—the moment you'd found out the babydaddy had gotten another girlfriend pregnant?" She kept her hand up and looked around again. "Well, I seem to be the only one in that category."

"Okay, first, stop saying 'babydaddy.' Second, it's not like that was all your fault--"

"Wait, wait. I'm not finished with my little survey. Alrighty, now, anyone in this room get engaged on a whim, then desert your fiancé the night before your wedding, thus forcing him to move three thousand miles away from you?" She paused, pretending to count hands. "Ah-ha! But how many of you kissed the ex-fiancee months after trampling his heart, shaking him up so badly he had to impose a basketball-player-height restraining order on you?"

"A what?"

"Never mind. Suffice it to say that I ran Max off the way I ran Christopher off, and Alex, and the way I'm due to run Jason off any second. It's like I'm genetically incapable of keeping a real, grown-up relationship together. I end up hurting or running away from a guy who cares about me, and I can't do that to Luke. I won't."

"Yeah, but sweetie, things could be different with Luke. He's nuts about you."

"Okay, let's just assume for one second, for the sake of argument, that he is 'nuts' about me. And let's assume that we do, somehow, by the grace of Nora Ephron, get together. You know what would happen as well as I do. Sooner or later—and my money's on sooner—I'd freak out and run, I'd hurt him, he'd close up like some flannel-covered oyster, and then that would be it. No more Luke, no more friendship, no more diner, no more coffee."

"You do not know that that could happen. You two could get together and it could be the most amazing thing ever. But you won't know unless you try."

"I'm sorry, do I need to run through my little poll again? 'Cause I think I just proved—"

"Okay, you know what? This is ridiculous." Sookie rarely spoke to Lorelai so strongly, but she was tired of watching her best friend tear herself down and walk away from what could make her truly happy. "For years, I've been listening to you go on and on about how horrible you are with men and how you suck at relationships. Well, as far as I can see, you've only done two things that could even remotely be considered mistakes. Now, all the crap with Christopher? You were sixteen. Stuff happened. And you had the guts to stand up to him and to your family and to do what you felt was right for you and for Rory. And from where I sit, you've managed to make a pretty good life for the both of you. Plus, let us not forget that he was the irresponsible ass who stayed away for sixteen years and then knocked up some other woman." Lorelai couldn't help smiling a little in gratitude at Sookie's wholehearted defense of her actions. "And as for Max, the only real mistake you could have made would have been marrying him when you knew you didn't really love him enough. You did the right thing there. The rest of it is just the trial and error junk that happens to every adult with a reasonably active dating life." Sookie took a deep breath, unaccustomed to delivering such long lectures. "So, that's two real mistakes in, what, twenty years of relationship experience? That's if you can even call them mistakes, which I don't. That's a pretty damned good track record to me."

Lorelai stared at Sookie, mulling over what she'd just said. No one had ever put it quite like that before. She'd spent so many years hearing her mother's disappointed voice in her head (okay, with her own, even louder disappointed voice drowning Emily's out) that she'd never even given herself a chance to enjoy a relationship before heading for the hills. If what Sookie was saying was true, maybe she wasn't so completely screwed up after all. Still . . ."I dunno, Sook. I mean, I see what you're saying, but I just don't know if I can take that chance. Not with Luke. It's just too scary."

"That's because he really means something to you. He's important to you. And you know how I know for sure?"

"How?"

"Because the whole time we've been sitting here talking, you've gone on and on about how Luke feels and whether or not he wants you. But you've never once said that you don't want him." As if to punctuate her point, she slid her chair back and walked over to the counter to cut two pieces of the chocolate cake.

Lorelai realized with a start that Sookie was right. Somehow, The Question of Luke and Lorelai had gone from a question of whether there was anything between them at all to a question of whether she had feelings for him to a question of whether he wanted her. Of course, it figured that she'd decide she wanted Luke just the very moment that possibility of something happening between them disappeared. She thought that was probably a good example of irony, but she wasn't sure. She made a mental note to ask Rory the next time she talked to her. "Yeah, well, you know what Bret Michaels and the boys say. 'Don't know what you've got 'til it's gone.'"

"That wasn't Poison. It was Cinderella."

"See?" Lorelai slapped her hand on the table. "This whole thing's got me so rattled I've got my cheesy band references all mixed up."

Sookie set a large wedge of cake in front of Lorelai, then sat down and looked at her seriously. "So, what are you gonna do?"

"Well, first I'm going to go back and watch all my I Love the 80s and I Love the 80s Strikes Back tapes so that whole embarrassing pop-culture-reference-mix-up thing doesn't happen again."

"Lorelai . . ."

Lorelai sighed. "I don't know. I don't think there's anything to do. We both said a lot of stuff and I don't see any way around it."

"Why don't you just talk to him?"

"Oh, yeah. And say what? 'Gee, Luke, I know I've hurt you a lot over the past ten years, and I know that I am to relationships what the German Luftwaffe was to London in 1940, but whaddya say? Wanna give it a shot? Oooh, baby, that'll make him swoon."

"Just talk to him. Tell him what's in your heart. You want him. He wants you—"

"You don't know that."

"Oh, you're right. The fact that he practically told you he wants you and then kissed you meant absolutely nothing."

It was true. Boy, had he kissed her. Three days later and she could still feel his lips on hers. "Well, obviously it didn't mean too much," she said, remembering the rest of their fight, "since he's never done anything about it."

"It just means that he's scared, just like you're scared. But I'm telling you, if you guys would just open up to each other you'd be amazed at how quickly everything would work out."

Lorelai wanted to badly to believe that Sookie was right, and that she could just go over and see Luke and talk to him and that they could repair their friendship. Maybe they could even build something more on top of it. "You really think so?"

Sookie gave her an encouraging smile. "Absolutely."

Lorelai started to smile back, but with a guilty start she remembered the relationship she was already in. "Well, anyway, even if I wanted to do something, I couldn't until I dealt with Jason."

"Ooh, yeah," Sukie winced. "What are you going to do there?"

"Well, Luke or no Luke, I have to end it. It's going to be hard. I mean, just a few days ago I practically swore to him that nothing was going on with Luke. But I have to be honest with him—he deserves that, at least." She grimaced. "Aw, man, and he just gave me the key to his place, too."

Sookie made a sympathetic face. "Oh, the poor thing. But, hey, it's better that you're honest with him now, before things get really serious."

"You're right. I have to do this before I can go to Luke and. . ." A surge of nervous excitement ran through her. "Hey, Sook?"

"Yeah?"

"Am I really gonna do this?"

Sookie beamed at her. "Yeah."

Lorelai smiled back. "Yeah."

**********************

Luke stood behind the counter of the diner, staring off into space. He had absolutely nothing to do. It was the middle of what Kirk had once called "your classic mid-morning lull," a period Kirk had gone on to compare to "a sweet death." In fact, the diner was pretty dead at the moment. Lane was in the back straightening up the storeroom because there was nothing else for her to do. Luke had thought of sending her home, but he knew that she could use the hours now that she was living in her new apartment. The only customer in the place was Kirk, who was sitting at the end of the counter trying to program one of those little electronic organizer things that Luke thought were a complete waste of time and money. Why would anyone want to let some little electronic device run their lives? Especially since in the time it took to program one of the stupid things you could write all of your appointments out on a calendar and all your phone numbers in an address book and be done with it. At the moment, Kirk didn't seem to be able to do much more than make the thing beep and chirp continuously. It was getting really annoying, and if it didn't stop soon, Luke was going take the organizer and shove it some place where it would never be of any use to Kirk or anyone else.

Ordinarily, during a lull like this, Luke would find a way to occupy himself. He'd place a few orders, go through the most recent restaurant supply catalogues (ultimately rejecting all the trendy new equipment as "useless" and "another way to get unsuspecting small business owners to spend money they don't have on crap they don't need") or go over the diner's books. But ever since the thing with Lorelai, it seemed he was only capable of doing the bare minimum needed to keep the place open. If he hadn't just taken a week off, he would have closed up for a few days and gone up to the cabin. But he knew Taylor would have a fit if he closed twice in a two week period, and at this point he didn't even have the energy for a good knock-down, drag-out Taylor fight.

He hadn't seen Lorelai since she'd walked out of the diner after their . . . well, whatever it was. That had been almost a week ago. Babette had said something about Lorelai being sick, but he knew she was just avoiding him. He still couldn't believe the way things had turned out. Of all the different scenarios he'd imagined for how Lorelai would react to knowing how he felt about her—and he'd imagined a lot of them—he never in million years would have thought she'd get mad at him. And what was all that craziness about him never really wanting her? She couldn't really believe that, could she? Yeah, he'd seen all the stuff she'd gone through with guys over the years. But he knew that wasn't all her fault—she'd just gotten involved with idiots who weren't right for her. He knew about her self-proclaimed tendency to freak out and run away, but he'd always told himself that when she found the right guy, she wouldn't run. She'd stay put and be happy. Of course, He'd always believed that he would be that 'right guy' who would make her happy and make her want to stay. Make all her dreams come true. Huh. Some dream man you are. You can't even get up the guts to go talk to her.

It wasn't like he hadn't tried to talk to her. Every night he'd pick up the phone to call her, then hang it up again when he realized he had no clue what to say to her. Once he'd gotten as far as dialing the first three digits of her phone number before slamming the phone back down. Then there was the night he'd walked over to her house, determined to have it out with her. But when he'd gotten a block away, he'd frozen. He'd just stood there, staring at the light in her bedroom window until he realized somebody might see him and call him in for stalking. He'd always thought he'd be the last guy to be a cliché from one of those stupid romantic movies, but here he was, Mr. Romantic Movie Cliché, and he hated it. He hated all of it. He hated knowing he'd been a cowardly jerk for so long. He hated not seeing her, not being able to talk to her. He hated feeling like he wasn't good enough for her. He hated all those guys who'd made her feel like she'd never be good enough for anyone. The only thing he didn't hate in this whole mess—the only person—was Lorelai. He'd tried to hate her before, the summer after Jess and Rory's accident, but there was no way. He could be annoyed by her, and he could be hurt by her, but he could never hate her. He sighed, and picked up his dishrag and began wiping down the counter. The wiping, the counter, the diner, they were his territory. They were things he could control.

The bell at the diner door jingled, and his heart skipped momentarily, just as it had done every time that door had opened in the past week. Every time he heard someone come through that door, he felt a split-second of hope that it would be Lorelai. But it never was. It would be Kirk, or Patty, or Lane or Ceasar coming in for a shift, but it wouldn't be her. It wasn't her this time, either.

"Hey, Luke."

Luke was surprised to see Nicole standing in the middle of the diner, but he was even more surprised to realize that he'd barely thought about her since the last time he'd seen her in Litchfield. Yeah, that marriage is really burned in your memory, isn't it, buddy?

"Nicole. Uh, what're you doing here?"

She chuckled. It was a small, nervous sound. "Boy, you always did cut right to the chase, didn't you?"

"No, I just mean that . . .It's just . . .I'm just surprised to see you here, that's all."

Nicole walked up to the counter. "Well, I had some things to finish up with Taylor, and I figured that since I was here I'd give these to you in person." She reached into her briefcase, pulled out some vaguely official-looking papers, and handed them too him.

Luke figured he knew what the papers were, and a brief glance at the wording on the top page told him he was right. "Wow. That was fast."

"Yeah, well, I pulled some strings. Everything should be finalized in a couple of months. I mean, I didn't think either one of us really wanted to prolong the matter. . ." She looked up at him, as if waiting for confirmation.

"Oh. Yeah, you're right. No use dragging things out."

"Right." She looked at her watch. "Well, I'd better get over to Taylor's." She gazed at him for a long, thoughtful moment. "Take care, Luke."

"Yeah, you too. See ya, Nicole."

Nicole walked to the door, then turned around again. "Luke?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm really sorry. About everything."

Luke looked at her. In spite of everything, she hadn't deserved the way he'd acted. The whole disaster had been at least as much his fault as hers. Probably more. "I'm sorry, too. Really." He meant it.

Nicole nodded and then walked out the door. Luke sighed and took another glance at the papers in his hand. There they were, his official membership papers in the Almost-Divorced Loser's Club. Those papers were proof that, no matter how many half-assed attempts he might make at putting together some kind of a life, he was never going to be anything but Luke, the Loner Who Lives Above the Diner. He sighed again and shoved the papers in the back pocket of his jeans.

"Lane!"

Lane came out to the counter. "What's up?"

"I'm goin' upstairs for a while. I do not want to be disturbed under any circumstances. If you want to keep your job, you will not knock on that door unless somebody's bleeding from a sucking chest wound or the place is burning down around your ears." He headed toward the stairs, then paused. "You know what? Even then, you'd better only knock if someone's death is immanent. Preferably mine." He stomped upstairs, not seeing the startled look on Lane's face.

***********************

Lorelai walked toward the diner, her heart pounding out a drum solo John Bonham and Keith Moon both would have been proud of. It had taken almost a week, but she had her emotional ducks in a row and was ready to try to begin a . . . well, to begin something with Luke. She'd already taken the first step—ending things with Jason. Actually, the break-up hadn't gone nearly as badly as she'd thought it might. Jason had seemed hurt and disappointed, but she could also pick up just the faintest hint of relief in his eyes. She figured that, key or no key, he had really been no more ready to commit to her than she 'd been to commit to him. When he'd dropped her off the night of the break-up, he'd left her with a parting shot that was completely a part of what Emily would call his "Jason-ness." "I just want it on the record that I would have fought for you," he'd said with a self-deprecating smile. "But the man wears flannel."

She'd needed a few days after that to clear her head, but now here she was, on her way to open herself up to something that could potentially change her life. She was so certain about what she was doing that she surprised herself. Ordinarily, she made it a practice of running from the big, scary emotional situations, but this time it was different. Maybe it was that she was finally, after nearly thirty-six years of junk food and pop culture addictions and hit-and-run relationships, beginning to grow up. Maybe it was because this time there was so much at stake. Whatever the reason, for the first time she was ready to face a big, scary emotional situation head-on and try to make something good for herself.

She was so intent on her thoughts that she didn't see Nicole until she had practically run over her.

"Oh, jeez, I—" She stopped as she got a good look at the victim of her clumsiness. At the sight of Nicole standing there in front of Luke's diner as if she didn't have a care in the world, all Lorelai's own fears and desires were replaced by a surge of protectiveness for her best friend and utter contempt for the woman who'd hurt him.

"Oh, my god. Nicole. What are you doing here?" 'Here,' as in standing in front of the establishment of the man whose heart you ripped out and stomped all over with your pointy little lawyer shoes.

Nicole gave the same nervous chuckle she'd given Luke a few minutes earlier. "That seems to be the question of the day."

"Sorry. I'm just surprised to see you here." Mainly because I didn't think you'd have the nerve to show your face here after what you did, you two-timing little skank.

"Well, I had to see Taylor, and Luke and I had some . . . business to take care of."

"Oh. Right." Yeah, I hope it was the business of divorcing your adulterous ass, Ally McCheat.

The two women looked at each other and realized they had absolutely nothing else to say each other.

"Well, I won't keep you from . ." carrying your lying, sneaking butt out of town and never coming back.

"Yeah, it was . . ."

They both made vague goodbye gestures, and Lorelai turned back to the diner, taking a deep breath before walking through the door. It was empty, with the exception of Kirk sitting at the counter fiddling with his new PDA and Lane standing behind the counter filling napkin dispensers. Luke was nowhere in sight.

"Hi, Lorelai," Lane smiled.

"Hey, Lane." Lorelai looked around, thinking that Luke might walk out from the back at any minute. When he didn't, she walked up to the counter and took a seat. "Luke around?" She hoped she sounded casual.

Lane nodded her head toward the stairs. "He's upstairs, and I don't think he's coming down for a while. He seemed pretty worked up about something. He told me not to disturb him unless it was a matter of life and death."

"He's distressed because Nicole just brought him divorce papers," Kirk piped up from his perch at the other end of the counter.

Lane and Lorelai both turned to face him. "Kirk, how in the world would you know something like that?" Lorelai asked.

"Because the documents she handed him were the same size and texture and contained approximately the same number of pages as the divorce papers I used to deliver when I worked as a courier for the law firm of Rains and Greenstreet. Plus, the words 'finalized' and 'I'm sorry' figured heavily in their conversation."

"He's probably right," Lane chimed in. "That would explain why Luke was so upset." She turned to Lorelai. "But, you know, I'm sure he'd like to see you, Lorelai. I could just go up and—"

"No, no, that's okay. Disturbing Luke when he doesn't want to be disturbed is kinda like getting into a cage with a white tiger. It can lead to very nasty consequences. Just ask Sigfired and Roy." Suddenly all the resolve and good intentions she'd had a few minutes earlier were gone. Oh, yeah, that's just what he needs after a visit from the wife who cheated on him—a drop-in from another woman who could potentially screw him over.

"Tell ya what, can I just get a large coffee to go?"

"Sure." Lane poured a cup and handed it to her.

"Thanks." She handed Lane her money and slid off the stool. "Well, I've gotta get back to work. You kids play nice while the boss is gone, okay?" She practically fled out of the diner.

A minute later, Luke came stomping back down the stairs. "I can't find the stupid invoice folder anywhere," he muttered.

"I think I saw it on the second shelf down there." Lane pointed to a spot under the counter as she rang up Lorelai's coffee. "Oh, and you just missed Lorelai."

Luke's head snapped up from where he was rummaging for the folder. "Lorelai was here?"

"Yeah, just a minute ago. She asked where you were, and I told her you were upstairs and didn't want to be disturbed."

"You did what?" He looked toward the door as if Lorelai might still be standing there. "Why would you tell her that? Why didn't you come get me?"

"Well, I was going to, but she said if you wanted to be left alone we should leave you alone."

"Yeah, but you still should have . . ." Luke ran his hands over his face and sighed.

"Did I do something wrong?" There was concern in Lane's voice.

Luke shook his head. "No, no, it's okay. Don't worry about it." He drew another deep breath. "Look, you go on back finish unpacking those boxes. I'll take over out here."

Lane scurried back to the storeroom, and Luke stood behind the counter, staring at the door Lorelai had just walked out of a minute earlier. If he were one of those fruity New Age types who believed in signs—which he most certainly wasn't—this sure seemed to be the Universe's way of saying he and Lorelai were fated to always keep missing each other.

"You know," came a voice from the other end of the counter, "if you're having relationship problems, I might be able to help"

Luke turned slowly. He hadn't even realized Kirk was still there. "What?"

"My girlfriend says I'm very intuitive."

"Oh, really?"

"Absolutely. She says I have an uncanny ability to pick up on what people are thinking and feeling."

"Oh, yeah?" Luke walked to where Kirk was sitting and stood in front of him, crossing his arms over his chest. "So, what am I thinking and feeling right now?"

Kirk looked at Luke for a minute, then slid off his stool. "You're thinking it's time for me to go home and give Buster his heartworm medicine."

"Good answer."

**************

A/N: So, there you have it: Buh-bye, Digger. Don't let the door hit you on the way out, Nicole.

I had written an actual L/J break-up scene, but it interrupted the flow of the chapter and made it way too long. I'd also written a Lorelai/Rory post-Meltdown conversation, but it turned out to be too banter-y and too Gilmore-y, if you know what I mean. Plus, I know Lorelai tells Rory almost everything, but (right or wrong) I think there's stuff about this situation—especially her deep insecurities and her image of herself as a sexual being—that even Lorelai wouldn't discuss with her kid. These are things I'd think she'd discuss with another adult. Hence, the Sookie convo.

Up Next: Star-gazing, gift-giving—oh, and Emily does a nice thing.