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Disclaimer: I own no one. Need I say more?
Ratigan and Veeken's next stop was back in Middleton to pick up Basil, with much reluctance from both one-half of the former and all of the latter. Put lightly, neither of them had really changed their opinion towards the other since the last time they had battled one-on-one in Middleton Fields, back when Basil was a member of The Rogue Dæmon Capture Society (T.R.D.C.S), which was quite awhile. Even with Ratigan's parting words from that fateful battle ringing in his head, Basil still had a certain level of hatred towards the infamous ex-villain.
Veeken had tried to patch up the already endangered partnership that somehow, without any knowledge between either of the two, had formed. But it was in flux, due to their history together. In retrospect, though, the "British Brace", as Kim dubbed it, was still going through some rough patches.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
"So, indulge me. Why are we traveling to Drakken's lair that could be swarming with guards, with a mouse whom I'd like to deal with less often than Bonnie Rockwaller?", Ratigan asked. They were aboard a remote-controlled helicopter that Wade had borrowed from an aeronautics lab to get them to Drakken's Arctic Lair. Basil had been in Britain at the moment when the call came in, so he chose to take a different mode of transportation. Considering Ratigan's opinion of having to be teamed up with him, it was a wise choice.
"Listen, the only reason we have to team up with him is because rons_gurl has the flu and Desiree is working on a mission in England", Veeken replied, trying to calm the already frazzled rodent. Ratigan opened his mouth to argue, and she added "And don't think we're just going back to heal her. If this situation is as bad as Shego said, we're going to need all the magic we can muster."
Ratigan turned away, a childish frown upon his lips. Lousy flu virus. Lousy mission. He sighed. "Well, it could be worse", he admitted. "It could be Will Du."
"Now there's that prize-winning optimism", Veeken joked.
Suddenly Wade spoke up, interrupting them. "You're there."
~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Basil was waiting for them atop the hill looking over Drakken's Arctic lair. The lasers were probably active, in case Monkey Fist ever got word of Drakken's monkeyshines towards DNAmy and decided to pay him a little visit. However, Ratigan doubted it. DNAmy was a bit ditzy, but she wasn't a total blabbermouth. But there was always the off-chance… "Oy", Ratigan thought. "Aren't I the little Professor Trelawney?"
In his home, Wade typed furiously on his computer, and the lasers appeared in all their crimson-cylindrical glory. Back at the lair, Ratigan saw all this through the telescope. "What's faster?", he asked, turning to Veeken. "Walking or snowboarding." Veeken's only response was to throw a jet-black snowboard at him.
Basil rolled his eyes. "I'll stick to walking, thank you", he said, starting off on his descent down the hill. As he passed Ratigan, he said "Don't choke."
"Only when I see you", Ratigan retorted.
Veeken shook her head. Sometimes there was just no standing those two.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *
They met at the bottom of the hill without much incident, or would have if it weren't for the sudden appearance of Rufus. In the long and short of it: Rufus suddenly made an appearance in one of Ratigan's coat pockets, seriously scaring him, and causing Rufus to fall out. Fortunately, Veeken had turned around in time, and prevented Rufus from touching one of the red beams like he did on his last visit. Other than that, everything went peachy.
Basil arrived shortly after they did. And, by that, I mean Veeken landed normally, and Ratigan fell into a snow bank, due to Rufus messing up his rhythm.
Basil walked up towards the former ruler of the European underworld, who was currently pulling his head out of the snow bank. "I see you choked."
Ratigan's only response was to shake the snow that had accumulated on his clothes onto the despised detective. "I take that as a 'yes'.", Basil continued.
"Well, I would have done better if someone hadn't had to make a sudden appearance", Ratigan retorted, glaring at Rufus.
"Speaking of small, pink, and furless, how'd he get here all the way from Middleton?"
"I don't know", Ratigan admitted. "I would like to know, but I don't."
Suddenly, Shego landed in the snow in front of them. "About time you guys got here! What did you use for transportation, a snail? Or did you use him?", she asked, indicating Rufus.
"Hey!", Rufus squeaked indignantly.
"Never mind, Shego", Ratigan interrupted. "What happened?"
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *
"When I came into the lab where Drakken usually builds his evil technology, I found this strange Phoebus project look-alike."
There was a machine in the middle of the huge room that looked like a high-tech chair hair-dryer, only different in color design. Ratigan approached it, then turned to face Shego. "This thing is unplugged, right?"
"Right now? Yeah, that thing's deader than someone who got his brain left behind in the Matrix."
Looking up into the helmet part of the device, Ratigan reached in and pulled out a few small black hairs. Placing them in the analysis slot of the Kimmunicator, Veeken turned her attention to Wade, now analyzing what could possibly be Drakken, and this was the source of the energy. Either that, or Shego really needed to blow-dry her hair.
"Well?"
"Well, the hair is Drakken's, but-", Wade started to say.
"But what?"
"I tried to track Drakken's location using the DNA tracker, but it's weird."
"How weird?", Ratigan asked.
"Another dimension weird", Wade explained.
"He used the Dimens-porter?", Veeken exclaimed.
"Looks like it", Wade replied.
"Dimensional travel?", Basil scoffed. "But that's impossible."
"Well", Ratigan said, walking over to a strange device hidden under a tarp. "If you ask me, Only those with narrow minds fail to see that the definition of 'Impossible' is 'Lack of imagination and incentive'."
Basil was about to argue, but the retort died in his throat when he saw what was under the tarp. Seeing a dimensional teleporter does that to a person.
~ * ~ * ~ * ~ *
Shego2Drakken: That was a great chapter. And now, Ratigan will sing the first stanza and the chorus of Say The Word.
Ratigan: (hiding) No.
Shego2Drakken: Go.
Ratigan: No.
Shego2Drakken: (pulling Ratigan out of his hiding place) Go!
Ratigan: I am not going to sing!
Shego2Drakken: It's either that or I post this picture of you all over the Web.
Ratigan: Fine. Hand me the lyrics.
(Shego2Drakken hands a piece of paper to Ratigan.)
Ratigan: (cont; singing)
I'm on it;
I got it;
I can do anything;
What you need;
Got your back;
Just say the word, I'm there;
If you find your world is caving in;
You can bet your gonna need a friend;
Someone to take those fears away;
Say the word;
Make a call and I'll be there;
Anytime, anywhere, have you heard;
That I'm all about saving your world;
All you have to do is say the word. (spoken) Now hand me that picture.
Shego2Drakken: You'll have to catch me first! (runs off)
Ratigan: We'll be back with the next chapter as soon as I get that photo back.