A/N. Here's the second instalment in our collection of twisted songs. I
rather like this one.

A wee bit over the lee, my lads,
A wee bit over the green.
The birds flew into the poor mans corn,
'Twas feared they'd never be s-s-s-s-s-s-seen, my lads,
'Twas feared they'd never be seen.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la.
Then out came a bonnie wee lass,
And O, she was so fair,
And she went into the poor man's corn
To see if the birds were th-th-th-th-th-th-there, my lads,
To see if the birds were there.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la.
Then out came a brave young man,
He was the fisherman's son;
And he went into the poor man's corn
To see where the lass had g-g-g-g-g-g-gone, my lads,
To see where the lass had gone.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la.
He put his arm around her waist,
Kissed her cheek and chin,
Then out spoke the bonnie wee lass,
"I fear it is a s-s-s-s-s-s-sin, my lads,
I fear it is a sin".
He kissed her once, he kissed her twice,
He kissed her ten times o'er,
'Twas fine to be kissing a bonnie wee lass
Who'd never been kissed be-f-f-f-f-f-f-fore, my lads,
Who'd never been kissed before.
Then out came the poor old man,
And he was tattered and torn.
"Faith if that's the you're minding the corn,
I'll mind it myself in the m-m-m-m-m-m-morn, my lads,
I'll mind it myself in the morn.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la.

M-m-m-morn!

The Stuttering Lovers (our version)
A wee bit over the lea, my lads,
A wee bit over the green,
The birds flew into the poor man's corn,
'Twas feared they'd never be s-s-s-s-s-s-seen, my lads,
'Twas feared they'd never be seen.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la.
Then out came a pretty chick,
And O, she was wearing too much makeup,
And she went into the poor mans corn
To see if the brothel was th-th-th-th-th-th-th-there, my lads,
To see if the brothel was there.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
Then out came a brave young man,
He was the fisherman's son,
And he went into the poor man's corn
To see where the chick had g-g-g-g-g-g-gone, my lads,
To see where the chick had gone.
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la la
He put his arm around her waist,
He kissed her cheek and much lower,
Then out spoke the pretty chick,
"I fear it is a s-s-s-s-s-s-sin my lads,
But it's to late for that."
He screwed* her once, he screwed her twice,
He screwed her ten times o'er,
'Twas fine to be screwing a pretty chick
Who'd never been screwed be-f-f-f-f-f-f-fore, my lads,
Who'd never been screwed before.
Then out came the poor old man,
And he was watching porn**,
"Faith, if that's the way you're watching the porn,
I'll watch it my self in the m-m-m-m-m-m-morn, my lads,
I'll watch it my self in the morn."
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
La la la la la la la
P-p-p-porn!

*You can substitute 'did' for screwed
**You can also say "And he was screwing the corn" but you then have to
change the rest of the verse accordingly