Future Imperfect Chapter 5
Rated-PG
Author notes: Well I decided not to go to Chris's future right now, because well- have you SEEN how many fics here at FF.net have them go there? I hope this is still funny. Comments, reviews even flames are appreciated! J This chapter happens before Spin City and doesn't follow that episode's events.
Last time….
"Right, responsibilities call." Piper said with renewed vigor. She got up and was determined not to look back at Leo for fear that she would break down and not leave at all.
Paige could see how forlorn her sister looked and went over to hug her.
"Let's get this show on the road." Paige said eagerly looking from one Piper to the other. She wished that she could have gotton to know Prue. But if they didn't get back Leo the elder would have a hernia. She also didn't want to think about what could happen to Wyatt and even Leo while they were gone.
Paige, Chris and Future Piper put their hands together and recited.
"Witches of the Haliwell line,
We call to you through space and time,
As three to whom thy power ties
Bring us back to where our proper space lies.
In time to save our family line.
Blue and Purple light glowed around the three as they each represented a part of the charmed ones power. Past Present and Future.
Leo squinted and Phoebe covered her eyes from the bright lights coming from the future people. They were surprised to find then that Future Piper, Paige, and Chris were still in the attic when the lights faded. After all when spells didn't work they rarely if ever had pretty lights with them.
Prue was about to announce that it hadn't worked when she saw Phoebe across the room looking older and with boy cut hair.
Paige saw said Phoebe first and announced "We're back!" hugging her older sister, not looking at the tagalongs behind her. Older Piper just smiled looking relieved back to Chris.
Older Phoebe( A/N :be glad I'm not referring to her as boy-Phoebe for short ;) ) at first looked relieved to see Paige "I was so worried, first Piper disapeered, and then you-" she looked over Paige's shoulder to see the 'visitors'
"Um… guys?" Her eyes gestured behind them.
"What?" Chris asked worried there might be demons behind them ready to attack-after all doesn't that happen every week? Anyways he turns around to see Prue.
"So, what, the spell didn't work and we all got transported to your time?" Prue said taking on the Captain obvious role.
"Where's Piper?" Leo asked looking around, just now realizing she wasn't by his side.
"Uh, Hi. I'm right here." Pregnant Piper said waving her hand.
"I think he means OUR Piper- she's gone." Past Phoebe said looking around.
Meanwhile In the season three past, a very confused Piper climbed the stairs to the attic, food in hand.
"Uh. Guys? LEO?!"
She had at some point before the spell was read, gone downstairs to get food for the visitors since it seemed like they'd be around for a while.
How you ask? Why by the power of Whim of the fanfic writer of course. Powerful magic that. Why? Because two Pipers was confusing my simple mind.
"I think we were supposed to draw a chalk circle around us to contain the magic." Piper said trying to explain.
"Hey, one badly written spell deserves another I say." Past Phoebe said nervously, trying to be liberal since she'd messed up the spell that had brought Paige.
"Speaking of which, how did you two*motioning at the ½ whitelighters* use a spell that was meant for Halliwell witches?" Prue asked suspiciously
"It didn't work just right did it?" Chris said looking uncomfortable.
"And uh, we're LIKE family." Paige said patting Future Phoebe on the shoulder.
"Well however it happened, I think I should go check with the elders-" Leo said uncomfortable. Talking to the Elders was his usual solution to any problem.
Half a beat later he found himself held bodily by Paige Chris and Future Phoebe who chorused. "NO!!"
"You can't do that!" Chris said panicking.
"Really can't." Future Phoebe said dead serious.
"Why not?" Leo asked confused.
"We need you to stay here and." Chris said doing his vague 'protecting the future' thing.
"Besides when you say you're going to 'talk to the elders' how many times do you actually do that? I think we all know you're really hanging out with your whitelighter friends." Paige rambled.
"What? I do not!" Leo protested while Prue and past Phoebe looked at him carefully.
"Suuure you don't." Future Phoebe said.
"I- usually go to the Elders." Leo said guilty.
"Told you so." said Paige to Phoebe.
Past Phoebe and Prue looked at Leo accusingly.
"What!" Prue said glaring.
"Well you girls get so emotional sometimes…" Leo justified.
"So you just leave us when we're about to get attacked? What do you make up 'what the elders say'? Or are you always faking it when you say 'the elders don't know'" Prue said furious.
Leo was wise enough not to say anything.
Phoebe the younger looked at her older self. "Oh your hair is so cute! Where did you, I mean I get that shirt?"
"You like it? It was 50% off at-" Older Phoebe ranted until she felt the annoyance of her sisters.
Elder Leo chose that moment to orb in. Chris thanked the heavens that he wasn't wearing his elder robes, that would have been a pain to explain. 'and change the future in even worse ways' (his favorite line)
(( There is Leo aka Leo A and Elder Leo aka Leo B, don't mix them up now. Be glad I'm not calling him Wyatt :P))
Elder Leo turned to Chris first, "Chris! Where did you take her? What did you do?" Leo B complained.
"Me? Why do you always blame me?" Chris complained
"He was only trying to protect me." Piper said drawing Leo B's attention to her.
His eyes widened and he stuttered. "You- You're Pregnant!"
"Congrads, Dad, If you'd been around anytime in the last 6 months you would have noticed that." Chris yelled.
"Who's the father?" Leo B asked Piper carefully.
Chris rolled his eyes. "Gee Dad you wouldn't happen to know anything that happened oh 6 months ago before you left permanently that might explain-"
"it's Chris." Piper said.
Leo B assumed she meant who the Dad was.
"I always knew you had a thing for whitelighters but I mean he's young enough to be your son." Leo B said bitterly. He was still in love with Piper and couldn't imagine her falling for someone else so quickly.
"Look who's talking you watched us all grow up, and you're old enough to be our grandpa Leo." Future Phoebe said slapping Leo B for his stupidity.
Chris just stared stupidly at the fight. Was his biological father that oblivious.(head in the clouds if you will )
"But you told me I was the father!" Leo A said defensively. Leo A was very happy that HIS Piper wasn't there at the moment.
Leo B suddenly notices Leo A, and is 1 part shocked, part two wondering if Piper went to the past to 'bond' with his past self- and barely registered Prue.
At his older self's confused look Leo A corrects his sentence. "I mean, his, yours- ours- future me."
"No not the Dad, the baby! It's Chris."
Both Leo's still looked confused.
Piper got dizzy, all the arguing wasn't helping. Chris rushed to her side.
"I'm sorry about, you know, mini me." He said gesturing at her stomach.
Leo B looked concernedly at Piper. "I didn't mean to upset you, but I need to know, who the father is."
Chris looked from Leo to Piper. "I'm glad I got my brains from the Halliwell side of the family."
"You and me both" Paige added.
Both Leo's remained terminally confused while the Haliwells finally got it- sort of.
"So, what, Paige, the baby is your niece/nephew?" Prue said.
It took a moment for Paige to get what Prue was thinking.
"Yes, he is, but Chris is not my brother." Paige said while Future Phoebe laughed.
"You thought they were siblings?!"
"You Lied?!" Past Phoebe said, Whitelighters lied?
" He lies all the time you should all get used it." Future Phoebe said.
"Yeah, what is with that? Didn't your mother ever teach you not to lie?" Piper said from her chair, grinning.
Chris, Paige and Future Phoebe laughed while everyone else seemed confused.
"So then will somebody please explain to me the truth?" Prue says exasperated with all the running around the bush.
"Philosophers have been trying to figure that out for centuries." Paige said.
"Ok, ok." Piper says sick of the arguing. She was pregnant and didn't need all this stress. "Let's sit down so that I can explain-"
" to those of you who should have figured it out ages ago" Phoebe said finishing her sentence for her.
"1. This baby is Leo's and my child. 2. This baby is Chris, as in the Chris that came from the future to here. 3. Leo this is your son Chris. You've met before. Now apologize to him. And when I mean Leo I mean you( pointing at Elder Leo)."
"Well technically he's not ½ Whitelighter. He's ½-" Paige comments.
"Shut up, they're all confused enough as it is." Chris interjects.
Future Leo's eyes bug out, "You…(pointing at Chris) I'm going to be a father again? But how is that possible?"
"Do I need give you 'The Talk." Chris asks Elder Leo.
Piper glares at her son giving him the 'you're not helping things' look.
"Remember 6 months ago Wyatt's Birthday, suspicious aphrodisiacs…"
Leo's face turns an interesting shade of red. "oh. Right. That."
Prue was curious why Piper would call Leo by his last name, were they barely on speaking terms?
~~
Bru Ha ha ha!
Suggestions? Comments? Should I bring Little Wyatt in? Or should we talk about Leo's elder stats first? (Sorry for taking so long to post this, but finals are this coming week and I've been dead sick for the last week and ½) Elders and Eyries should have a new chapter sometime in the next few weeks too. And you might get a diff. Leo/Piper one shot soon.
Thank you Kateydidnt for the use of your computer and for helping to nurture this chapter's plot bunnies! Yay late night roommate talks!