NOTE: I do not own any of 'The O.C' characters… you can thank FOX. If you have any questions or comment you can e-mail me at liverbrain22@hotmail.com

(Please read and review!)

I know I've been bad…I haven't updated a lot with this story. I have no clue where I'm going with it…But I got a lot of suggestions so here goes another chapter. (Sorry for any spelling mistakes…I try my best.)

Chapter Eight

"How far along, Dr. Walker?" Marissa asked, holding onto Ryan's hand. Marissa was propped up in the hospital bed staring at the monitor to her side. This was really happening, she thought to herself.

"Four months, Mrs. Atwood. A late November baby, to be exact." Dr. Walker replied. Marissa gave Ryan's hand a squeeze. "How are your other children doing?" He asked, wiping down her belly and pulling her shirt down.

"Good." Marissa said. She then pulled her feet over the bed and stood up, stumbling into Ryan's arms. "Whoa…" Marissa mumbled.

"Marissa, I'm a little concerned about you." Dr. Walker said, looking at her then back at Ryan. "Have you been eating?"

"She hasn't been eating a lot since…Since Aden, Dr. Walker." Ryan replied for Marissa.

"You need to take care of yourself and eat, Marissa. You also need to take a lot of vitamins to keep your baby healthy. You've given birth twice Marissa, you should know this." The doctor scowled. "I would like to refer you to a family therapist." He finally told them. "If you want your baby to be healthy you must face reality of what happened to Aden."

"We understand that, Dr. Walker, but…"

"I'm already looking into it." Ryan interrupted Marissa. "Thank you, Dr. Walker." Ryan shook hands with him and left the office, guiding Marissa to their car.

"So you really think we should see someone?" Marissa asked. Her head was leaning against the window bobbling back and forth with every bump in the road.

"Yeah, before things go any further…. For precaution." Ryan explained. "I don't want to lose you or the boys."

"You'll never lose me, Ryan. I love you too much."

"I love you too." Ryan replied, glancing over at her. "It's lunch time, did you want to go grab something to eat?" He asked.

"Uhhh." Marissa moaned and Ryan glared at her. "Fine." She gave in and then added, "As long as it's Chinese."

"I haven't had Chinese since…Forever."

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Ben sat in the dark room staring blankly in front of him. He didn't know where he was. The room was dark and ever few seconds he saw flashes of stray lights bouncing around the room. He was beginning to tremble at the thought of the darkness closing in around him. He then started to hear voices and people calling his name. He thought for a sure he heard Aden's voice, but that was impossible, Aden was at home sleeping. Yes, he was at home sleeping because he was sick today and he couldn't be with him right now. But right now he needed him and he wasn't there for him. Ben started to tremble even more and rocked back and forth in the chair he was sitting in. The darkness was scaring him and he wanted to go to sleep, just like Aden.

"Where's Ben?" Seth shouted at the secretary in the school's office.

"And who are you?" The lady asked, looking up from her computer.

"I'm Ben's Uncle…His parents are out and I got a call earlier from the principle to pick him up. Where is he!" Seth demanded. The principle had called him earlier at the house reporting for someone to pick Ben up because he had gotten into a fight and was unresponsive.

"Mr.…"

"Cohen, Seth Cohen." Seth bellowed out.

"Mr. Cohen, Ben's in the nurses office right now. Here, let me go get him." The secretary informed him, leaving the office."

Ben remained trembling in the dark room. Then all of a sudden he felt hands grabbing at him, trying to pull him up. Ben immediately started swatting at the hands and wiggling away from the large grip. The big hands let him go and he fell back again in the cold darkness.

The secretary walked back to the office. "Mr. Cohen, please come this way." The secretary ordered. Seth followed her down the hallway and into the nurse's office. He shocked to find Ben curled up in a chair rocking back and forth, shaking. "He won't let us touch him." The secretary said before leaving the room.

"What's wrong with him?" Seth asked the nurse.

"He was in a fight at recess hour and when the teachers pulled him away he just went…He just went blank. I tried everything. He doesn't seem to be responding to anything." The nurse explained.

Seth crouched down besides Ben's chair, ignoring the nurses' order not to get too close. "Ben?" Seth whispered. Nothing. "BEN?" He shouted.

Ben rocked back and forth looking into the darkness around him. He saw another light and tried to hold onto it, but it was worthless. He couldn't get any light from where he was and he was too afraid to run after it. He decided to just sit and wait for the light when he heard his Uncle Seth.

"BEN?" Seth shouted again. Ben slowly stopped rocking and tried to listen. "Ben, come on buddy, let's go home." Seth said, rubbing Ben's arm. Ben didn't shrink away from the hand that was touching him.

"You did it." The nurse commented.

Seth scooped Ben into his hands. "Thanks." He mumbled to the nurse as he left the nurse's office with Ben in his arms. He carried Ben to his car and drove him home. Ben didn't say anything the whole ride home. His eyes were open but unresponsive. Seth still talked to him the whole entire car ride home but Ben surely wasn't interested in anything Seth had to say.

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"I haven't eaten this much food in a long time." Marissa commented, shoving more rice into her mouth. "I forgot how much I love Chinese food."

Ryan smiled at her. "Just don't eat too much, Marissa. You'll either throw up as soon as we get into the car and move or have the runs like you wouldn't believe."

Marissa laughed at slapped his arm. "Wouldn't you like to see me have the runs." She joked, eating more Chinese food.

Ryan smiled at her again and admired her laughter. It had been a long time since he'd heard her laugh. They ate the rest of their Chinese food from the large buffet and then Ryan paid the bill. "Did you want to go anywhere else before we head home, or not?" Ryan asked, starting the engine of his car.

Marissa held her stomach and moaned. "I think home is a good idea right now…"

"I told you not to scarf down your food like that, Marissa. You're going to regret it." Ryan told her, as he drove out of the parking lot and headed home.

Marissa laughed nervously and said, "I'm not sick." Ryan laughed at her and shook his head. "What?" She demanded.

"Nothing, you're just sexy when you're sick…In a kinky kind of way…" Ryan laughed.

Marissa slapped his arm, "Just drive!" She laughed, leaning her head against the window, regretting the Chinese food that was for sure going to come out of her any minute.

Ryan pulled up into their lane way and Marissa immediately ran out of the car and into the house. Ryan followed her inside but before he could assist her in the bathroom Seth stopped him in the living room.

"Ryan!" Seth called out from the living room. He was watching an old re run of Save by the Bell on television.

"What? Marissa's sick, I have to go help her." Ryan replied, following Marissa into the upstairs bathroom. Seth got up from the couch and followed Ryan.

"Leave." Marissa ordered to Ryan and Seth. Her head was in the toilet with one hand clenching the bowl, the other hand waving in the air. "I can handle this, leave!"

"Chinese food." Ryan whispered to Seth.

"Ah, I see." Seth replied and then said, "I think you should go check on Ben. He's home – "

"Why is Ben home?" Ryan cut him off.

"They couldn't reach you." Seth explained. Ryan took out his cell phone and noticed he had turned it off when he was at the doctors. "He got into a fight and when the teachers pulled him off the kid he…well he hasn't said or done anything since. Go check on him, Ryan. I'll make sure Marissa gets in bed. Don't worry." Seth reassured him.

Ryan left the bathroom and went to Ben and Aden's room. Well, Ben's room now, Ryan thought to himself. He knew he had to start calling it Ben's room, not Ben and Aden's room. He made a mental note and opened the door. Ben was lying down in Aden's bed and for a second Ryan thought for sure that he looked like Aden. They both looked the same, except Aden was a bit taller than Ben. But the both had short dirty blonde hair with blue eyes. Ryan walked up to Ben and sat down on the bed. "Ben?" Ryan tried to wake him up by poking him in the back.

Ben didn't respond, instead he started to rock back and forth in the bed. Ryan got up from the bed and went over to Ben's book shelve, pulling out his favorite book. When Ben and Aden were young he would always read to them before they went to bed. He thought that maybe Ben would stop rocking if he read to him. So, Ryan took the book back to Ben and lay down next to his rocking body. Ryan opened the book up at started reading, "Tommy doesn't like fish, but his mother makes him eat it…" Ryan read out loud. He continued reading, glancing over to Ben every time he slowed down from his rocking. When he was done the book Ben's eyes were opened and staring up at the bed above him. "Ben?" Ryan asked.

Ben turned over on his side. "Shhh…" Ben whispered, coving one finger with his mouth.

"What?" Ryan asked.

"He's sleeping…Shhh." Ben told him again and closed his eyes.

"Who's sleeping?" Ryan asked. Ben turned over on his side, away from his dad and stared at the wall. "Are you sleeping, Ben?"

Ben turned over and stared at his dad. "Shhh…" He repeated. "Aden's sleeping. He'll get mad at me if you wake him."

"Ben, Aden's not – That's not true…Aden's – "

"Sleeping." Ben finished off for him.

"No!" Ryan yelled him and then sat up in the bed. "Aden's not sleeping!" He yelled out at Ben again. He then grabbed his shoulders and started shaking him. "Aden's not sleeping! He's gone, Ben!"

Seth came running into the bedroom and ran towards Ryan, who had stopped yelling at Ben, but was still violently shaking him. "Ryan, let go of him!" Seth demanded from him, trying to pull him off the bed. Ryan's grip on Ben was too tight for Seth.

Ryan continued shaking him, "He's not sleeping, Ben!" Ryan shouted again at the little boy.

Ben started crying. "He's sleeping!" Ben yelled at his dad. "Shut up! I hate you! He's sleeping!" Just then Ryan slapped him across the face and threw him against the wall. Ben huddled in the corner of his bed and started to rock back and forth.

"Ryan…" Seth said, trying to get him off the bed.

"Shit…Seth," Ryan shrugged off Seth's helping hands and got off the bed. "Shit." Ryan repeated, pacing the floor. Tears were forming. "I – I didn't mean to…"

"It's okay, Ryan. Go, I'll make sure he's okay. Why don't you go pick up Conner from school."

"I – I…" Ryan stumbled on his words, looking at his son, who was still rocking back and forth.

"Go, I've got it." Seth reassured him. "Marissa's in bed, I have everything under control."

Ryan gave in and left the house to go pick up Conner. Ryan didn't know what had just happened in Ben's bedroom. One minute he was reading to his son, the next he was shaking him, then he had hit him. Before that he had never hit any of the boys. He made a promise to himself that he would never be like his parents. Never be like his mom's countless boyfriends whom she brought home every night. Ryan knew he had failed. He had failed his own family, just like his family had failed on him.

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"Ben, are you okay, buddy?" Seth asked, crawling towards him on the bed. He could hear Ben crying. He put a hand on his shoulder and Ben shrank away from his touch, mumbling incoherently to himself. "It's okay, Ben. It's me, Uncle Seth."

Ben looked up at him, tears flowing down his cheeks. "He's…He's sleeping, you have to be quiet." Ben ordered his Uncle. He then clasped onto the book his dad had just read to him. His knuckles were turning white, as he held on to it. "I hate him." He mumbled and then tore the book up in shreds, littering its piecing across the bedroom floor.

"Are you going to be okay, Ben?" Seth whispered to him. He wasn't sure what was going on with Ben.

Ben shook his head and slid into the bed's covers, covering himself with the blankets. He then fell asleep. Seth stayed with him for awhile and then left to go call his dad. He needed to help Ryan and his family, but he didn't know how. Maybe his dad would know how to help them.

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"I'm pregnant, Ryan!" Marissa shrieked, waving the pregnancy test in the air. "We're going to have a family now!" She hugged Ryan and then kissed him. Ryan kissed her back and smiled at her. "We're going to have a family now." She repeated.

Ryan smiled back at her. "I love you."

"I love you too, Ryan!" She said and then kissed him again.

Marissa went to go call Summer to tell her the good news and left Ryan alone in their small apartment bedroom. He sat on the end of his bed with his head in his hands. "What am I getting myself into?" He mumbled to himself. He knew he had always wanted a child of his own. But now that the time had come to have a child, he was having second thoughts. What if he accidentally hurt the child? Or worse, what if he hurt Marissa? He didn't want to end up in the Atwood's Cycle of bad luck, which he was going to strike him soon because he was happy now. Atwood's are never happy, they are bound for bad luck.

He looked around his tiny apartment bedroom and then walked over to his desk, where he picked up a picture frame. It was a picture of Trey, his wife, Josh, Marissa and himself. They were at a family gathering at the Cohen's house. Trey was his family and so were the Cohen's now. He had two families, but he knew deep down inside that he only had one family. The Atwood's were his family. "Curse family." Ryan mumbled to himself. He wanted a family of his own now. "Break the cycle…" He reminded himself.

"HONNNNNNK!"

Ryan snapped out of his daze and pressed his foot on the gas pedal. He didn't know how long he was at that stoplight, but the guy behind him was pretty irritated at him right now. Ryan drove around Newport and made his way to Harbor Elementary and picked up Conner.

"Daddy, why are you not talking?" Conner asked, fidgeting with the zipper on his sweater.

Ryan ignored his question. "How was school?" He asked, focusing on the heavy afternoon traffic.

"Can I have a donkey?" Conner asked.

"A donkey? Why on earth would you want a donkey, Conner?" Ryan laughed at him.

"Gregg in my class…He has a donkey. Why can't I have a donkey."

Ryan began reasoning with his son. "You can have a donkey…" Conner started to celebrate in the passenger seat. "As long as it's stuffed." Ryan added.

"Stuffed?" Conner asked.

"Yeah, I'll get you a stuffed donkey. If that's what you really want."

"I want a dog now…Can I have a dog? Gregg has a dog."

Ryan rolled his eyes at his son. "You have a dog, Conner."

"He's not real, Dad. Why can't I have one? Gregg has one."

"No."

"Please?"

"No!"

"I changed my mind, I want a cat. Gregg has a cat…. And he said that…" Conner began talking uncontrollably. He was like Seth in so many ways. Ryan pretended to listen to him, nodded occasionally as he drove home.

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