Thank you for the reviews, everyone! And to shukuchi, I want you to know
that I am currently unable to e-mail you because, throughout the entire
city, NOBODY can access Hotmail. Argh! Also, shukuchi, please tell Caitlin
to come and read this story.
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Back in our room I noticed that new clothes had been spread out on the previously unoccupied bed. Storm was probably the one who had put them there. Somewhere in the building there must have been a large stash of clothes for new arrivals, since so many of them had nothing except what they were wearing. I put Spirit's backpack next to the bed. She looked around, then sank on to the bed as if she were overwhelmed.
~Are you okay?~ I asked.
Spirit looked at me reassuringly. ~I'll be all right. It's just that I'm extremely tired. On the way here I took a nap, but other than that I've been awake for twenty-six hours. No, really!~ I had been communicating disbelief. ~I probably have to take a shower first of all, though.~
~Go ahead,~ I told her.
~Thank you again,~ she thought back.
While she was in there I worked on my essay, but at the same time I had to wonder about my new roommate. Several questions that I wanted to ask her floated around in my head. I have never been known as a tactful person, and it didn't occur to me that even someone as friendly as Silent Spirit might not want to discuss her life to a near stranger. She was in the shower for an awfully long time. Enjoying the hot water, I suppose. When she came out, in fresh clothes and combed hair, I could see the exhaustion that had previously been masked by dirt. I had also not observed some of her physical characteristics, since I had been trying to get used to her mutations. Now that they less surprised me, she looked distinctly Asian. Spirit was rather small for a teenager. If she didn't have an air of maturity and suffering you might have mistaken her for a ten-year-old. Her face was fine-boned, and her hair was not very thick. If everyone had gray fur, silver nails, and silver hair she would've looked normal, as well as reasonably pretty.
A thought burst out of my mind without my meaning it to. ~Why do you have to wear sunglasses? Is their something wrong with your eyes?~
Silent Spirit sat down on the floor. She didn't seem to have enough energy to stand. ~Not really *wrong* ,~ she answered, hugging her knees, ~though some people thought it was. It can be a good thing, too. Draw the curtains and turn off the lamp, and I'll show you what they look like.~
I did what she asked. A little light seeped in from under and between the curtains, so I could still see Spirit in front of me. Feeling self- conscious, I sat down on the floor with her. She took the sunglasses off very slowly, and held them in her left hand, which fortunately was not broken along with the arm. ~This is the mutation that scares people the most,~ Silent Spirit thought to me. I could see why. Her eyes were black, completely black. Spirit's eyes had no irises or whites, just enormous pupils that swallowed up everything. They seem to absorb light, and I couldn't see my reflection in them. They looked like the void of space and the eyes of aliens in bad horror movies. Fear emanated from those eyes, fear of the unknown, fear of loneliness, fear of death. In that moment I knew she had faced every one of those trials, and had survived. For one second I wished she wasn't there, and I wanted those eyes to go away and leave me alone.
Then I 'heard' her think, ~Please, don't let her be like so many others. I want someone who can see beyond the terror, and look deeper. Will anyone do that? I've been looking for someone all this time, who will find the real me. It's a risk, testing her like this so soon, but I can't hide, I never could hide. If nobody is left who will know me for who I am, I think I'll follow my parents, who do.~ I don't think she meant that thought for me. It was deeper within her mind than the thoughts I'd been able to pick up before. But the thought broke the spell.
I could look pass the void, into her true spirit. I saw loneliness, and hundreds of nights filled with tears. Yet there was also an unflagging love for the world, and faith in humanity that I didn't have. In her life she had laughed and sang, had been kind to others even when they pushed her away and rejected her, and had always hoped for the day when she would be understood. I could see her soul, and it was beautiful. Of course she wasn't perfect, but she was certainly not a freak. Perhaps I'm becoming too sentimental, but it's an amazing thing to have a revelation like that. I couldn't have said or thought anything then if my life were at stake, so I told her about what I now knew the best way I could. I hugged her.
She cried without any sound that I could hear. When I let go I saw her mouth move, shaping the words "Mom, Dad, someone living cares about me, too." At least, she told me later that was what she said. Spirit laboriously crept to her bed and climbed onto it, careful not to move her broken arm. She put her sunglasses back on, and I pulled open the curtains again. ~Is it okay for me to let the light back in?~ I asked.
~Yes,~ she thought back. ~Please wake me up after two hours. I want to try getting used to sleeping at night again. You probably have homework to do.~ A final sleepy thought came, ~I want to talk to you when I'm not so tired. I think we are friends, now.~
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Back in our room I noticed that new clothes had been spread out on the previously unoccupied bed. Storm was probably the one who had put them there. Somewhere in the building there must have been a large stash of clothes for new arrivals, since so many of them had nothing except what they were wearing. I put Spirit's backpack next to the bed. She looked around, then sank on to the bed as if she were overwhelmed.
~Are you okay?~ I asked.
Spirit looked at me reassuringly. ~I'll be all right. It's just that I'm extremely tired. On the way here I took a nap, but other than that I've been awake for twenty-six hours. No, really!~ I had been communicating disbelief. ~I probably have to take a shower first of all, though.~
~Go ahead,~ I told her.
~Thank you again,~ she thought back.
While she was in there I worked on my essay, but at the same time I had to wonder about my new roommate. Several questions that I wanted to ask her floated around in my head. I have never been known as a tactful person, and it didn't occur to me that even someone as friendly as Silent Spirit might not want to discuss her life to a near stranger. She was in the shower for an awfully long time. Enjoying the hot water, I suppose. When she came out, in fresh clothes and combed hair, I could see the exhaustion that had previously been masked by dirt. I had also not observed some of her physical characteristics, since I had been trying to get used to her mutations. Now that they less surprised me, she looked distinctly Asian. Spirit was rather small for a teenager. If she didn't have an air of maturity and suffering you might have mistaken her for a ten-year-old. Her face was fine-boned, and her hair was not very thick. If everyone had gray fur, silver nails, and silver hair she would've looked normal, as well as reasonably pretty.
A thought burst out of my mind without my meaning it to. ~Why do you have to wear sunglasses? Is their something wrong with your eyes?~
Silent Spirit sat down on the floor. She didn't seem to have enough energy to stand. ~Not really *wrong* ,~ she answered, hugging her knees, ~though some people thought it was. It can be a good thing, too. Draw the curtains and turn off the lamp, and I'll show you what they look like.~
I did what she asked. A little light seeped in from under and between the curtains, so I could still see Spirit in front of me. Feeling self- conscious, I sat down on the floor with her. She took the sunglasses off very slowly, and held them in her left hand, which fortunately was not broken along with the arm. ~This is the mutation that scares people the most,~ Silent Spirit thought to me. I could see why. Her eyes were black, completely black. Spirit's eyes had no irises or whites, just enormous pupils that swallowed up everything. They seem to absorb light, and I couldn't see my reflection in them. They looked like the void of space and the eyes of aliens in bad horror movies. Fear emanated from those eyes, fear of the unknown, fear of loneliness, fear of death. In that moment I knew she had faced every one of those trials, and had survived. For one second I wished she wasn't there, and I wanted those eyes to go away and leave me alone.
Then I 'heard' her think, ~Please, don't let her be like so many others. I want someone who can see beyond the terror, and look deeper. Will anyone do that? I've been looking for someone all this time, who will find the real me. It's a risk, testing her like this so soon, but I can't hide, I never could hide. If nobody is left who will know me for who I am, I think I'll follow my parents, who do.~ I don't think she meant that thought for me. It was deeper within her mind than the thoughts I'd been able to pick up before. But the thought broke the spell.
I could look pass the void, into her true spirit. I saw loneliness, and hundreds of nights filled with tears. Yet there was also an unflagging love for the world, and faith in humanity that I didn't have. In her life she had laughed and sang, had been kind to others even when they pushed her away and rejected her, and had always hoped for the day when she would be understood. I could see her soul, and it was beautiful. Of course she wasn't perfect, but she was certainly not a freak. Perhaps I'm becoming too sentimental, but it's an amazing thing to have a revelation like that. I couldn't have said or thought anything then if my life were at stake, so I told her about what I now knew the best way I could. I hugged her.
She cried without any sound that I could hear. When I let go I saw her mouth move, shaping the words "Mom, Dad, someone living cares about me, too." At least, she told me later that was what she said. Spirit laboriously crept to her bed and climbed onto it, careful not to move her broken arm. She put her sunglasses back on, and I pulled open the curtains again. ~Is it okay for me to let the light back in?~ I asked.
~Yes,~ she thought back. ~Please wake me up after two hours. I want to try getting used to sleeping at night again. You probably have homework to do.~ A final sleepy thought came, ~I want to talk to you when I'm not so tired. I think we are friends, now.~
