Author's note:
Fuji: "Wooooohooooooo! We have reviews…. THANK YOU! To be honest I didn't expect it, after what we did to Tenchu characters…"
Riki: "Tell me about it…But over and past that stance, here is the next chapter."

Disclaimer:
Do not sue us, because it would be pointless (we don't have any money and our capability to understand and write English is limited [you can see that from our fic])

Warning:
You will probably hate us after this…remember that this is wrote purely for fun, and that fun is mostly meant for us.

Coffee and playstation just don't mix
Chapter 2

Tenrai: "There happened a lot more before gang got outside, but for sake of your minds we do not tell you about those events. As they walked to outside Riki couldn't help wondering; how strange group they were: Ayame in black fur…"
Fuji interrupts: "She looked like a film star."
Riki glares evilly.
Fuji: "What?"
Riki: "Tenrai, please continue."
Tenrai: "Kiku in furry baby pink coat and matching mittens, all three men were in black leather coats and different coloured pullovers; Rikimaru in white, Tatsumaru in blood red and Onikage in black."
Fuji: "Surprise, surprise."
Tenrai (ignoring Fuji): "Onikage had also changed his pants to leather pants because of Riki's request…"
Fuji: "And with her help (zipper can be so hard to close…)"
Riki: "Who wrote that in there!? Fuji!"
Tenrai: "…Girls! We don't discuss about the details, because it would raise this fic's rating from pg-13 to R, so we decided to skip that part."


Kiku: "Where are we going?"
Fuji: "Not to my place…maybe in school…"
Riki: "That is your best idea in whole week!"
Fuji: "Thanks! Can I have some coffee now? Oh, wait clock is only twelve. We can't go in school… There are normal people in there!"
Riki: "Where to we go then?"
Fuji: "To café!"
Riki: "…That was a really stupid thing to ask, wasn't it? Let's all go to the café!"

Fuji and Riki are not aware of the beautiful, red, expensive looking Porsche that is soon going to go pas them in the road. Rikimaru senses it (Well, it's a "Porsche 911 Carrera 4 Coupé" painted as red!!). He turns around and exposes his katana.

Riki notices that Ayame is steering something behind the gang and turns around. Riki's jaw drops open as she sees the awesome Porsche. As she can't get any words out, she taps Fuji's back, trying to get her turn around. Fuji turns and sees –the car-, but is not so interested about it. But the thing that draws her attention is that Rikimaru is closing the expensive vehicle with, ever so beautiful, Izayoi.

Riki: "What Fuji?"
Fuji: "No-no---no-no-no!

Rikimaru leeps over Porsche's bonnet.
Riki: "No-no---no-no-no!!!"
Tatsumaru: "What does no-no---no-no-no-mean? It's just a beast, right?"

Rikimaru turns in the air his back against the wind. Taking a tight grip of Izayoi, jumping over the cars roof, he kind of thrusts the katana down and lets it pierce the car in half.

Riki faints.

Fuji runs to the car. She takes unharmed, shocked, driver out of the car. Fuji tells him to go in a big white building across the road, and in there to tell a man with white clothes to give him money. Because he had played apart on a movie called "The last frigging ninja". Fuji eyed Rikimaru frustratedly.

Driver: "Okay! Glad I could help you!"
He said, starting to walk happily towards the Mental hospital.

Fuji: "Now… Onikage, take Riki from the road and all of you run around the corner. There is a big building made of tiles, stay at the hall… And for God's sake… Don't do anything!

Others leave as Fuji stays behind. She puts five euros at the broken windshield, and goes after the gang.

^^Fuji's POV^^:

^^I try to calm my self as I step to the baths, trying to forget the incident Rikimaru had just a little while ago created… I take a deep breathe and open the door. Tatsumaru is lying unconscious in the floor. Receptionist is apparently fled. Riki is waking up in Onikage's arms as the dead boy senior himself is drooling over swim suited woman who are walking behind the class fall towards the pools. Rikimaru and Ayame are in one corner with Kiku, trying to block her view to the pools. ^^

Fuji: "What happened to him?"
Pointing unconscious Tatsumaru and rushing towards him.

Onikage: "Poor guy hasn't get laid in a long time… I suspect this was too good to be true…"
Fuji: "What is?"

Rikimaru walks to the class and sees a woman passing by in really small bikinis. He almost points at the woman and drooling tries to comment about it. Onikage nods, fully understanding and sighs: "Oh, yeah…!"

Riki now fully awaken: "Hey! Watch your eyes!!"
Onikage: "Sorry. Would you like to accompany me in the closet?"

Riki slaps him on the face. Onikage tries to defend himself with a good old three kicks combo. Riki stops it easily in a midway and says in a playful tone:
"Oh-you-wanna-play, huh?"
Onikage: You have some skills, but you could never beat me."

Riki: "Wanna bet?"
Onikage: "…What's my price? …Riki or Kiku? I don't know witch one…or…both!"
Riki: "You price it's to stay alive!!"
Others: "Auts…"
Riki: "…or dead… whatever…"

Onikage: "Don't you like me anymore, did I do something wrong, in that closet…?"

Others: "What closet?"

Fuji: "…You mean…Riki!!"
Riki pluses: "I don't really like him!!"
Others: "Delusional…"

Riki: "Now I have to kill you…Any last wishes?"
Onikage: "…You, me and closet?"

Riki: "…Just try to stop this!"

Ayame: "Aren't you afraid that you friend might die?"
Fuji: "No."
Ayame: "…How cruel are you! ... You want to make a bet?"
Fuji: "Are you really that willing to loose all your money?"
Kiku: "You look quite confident. Can I make a bet too?"
Fuji: "No. Because I don't want you to get all my money, because that would mean that you could boss me around and you seem a lot like my little sister…I don't want that to happen again…"
Kiku: "That's unfair!"
Fuji. "Try to get used to it. Because that's the way the things are in this world, little one."

Kiku: "That's not true…! I'm even taller than you."
Fuji: "Maybe… But you can't make coffee.

Strangely all the pretty woman had vanished from the pools, so Rikimaru and Tatsumaru are looking Onikage getting beat up.

Tatsumaru: "Poor Onikage… That must hurt… Wasn't she supposed to be a non-combatant?"
Rikimaru: "Her Ki is non-combatants, but apparently her Ki can lie. Could other peoples Ki lie too? Could she be the final boss of the next game?" Pointing Fuji, who was arguing with Kiku.

Riki: "What's the point killing you? You always pop back…
Riki drops down her weapon. (One of those float, which children use when they are learning to swim)

Rikimaru: "What?! What's the point not killing him!!"
Rikimaru throws a huge fit and turns his back to them sulking.

Riki: "Give me your hand and rise up…"
Onikage roses up bit of astonished: "I agree… This is… weird."
Riki: "It was fun to play with you."
Riki bends closer to crumbing Onikage: "And I may play with you later in the closet…"

Onikage's lips curl in a smile.

Fuji: "What did she say to you?"
Onikage: "I won't tell… I'm evil!"

Fuji: "Jeesh, the man is frigging happy because he was told he is evil. What an idiot… Now Ayame please hand me my money. We could go to school now anyway all the other students, except that cursed music-group, are gone."
Riki: "Why are you cursing? You even won some money…"
Fuji: "I haven't got any coffee since we left from your place."

Riki: "What's in your backpack anyway?"
Fuji: "My coffee! I had already forgotten it!"
Tatsumaru: "This maybe a little stupid thing to ask, but what is coffee?"
Fuji in astonishment: You don't know what coffee is?!!"
Tatsumaru: "No, but you can tell me, right?"
Fuji: "Luckily I took two cups with me. Could you hold this for me for a moment?" she asks and gives Tatsumaru two coffee cups as she unpacks a huge thermos bottle out of her backpack.

Tenrai: Finally after way too many cups of coffee (mainly for Fuji) the gang arrives to the school. Fuji has drank about ten big cups of strong, black coffee and is now in caffeine high, laughing even more hysterically than Onikage before (In the first chapter.) She has big problems to stay standing from her laughter and because of that she is leaning to very reluctant Rikimaru. They try to sneak in the art class as unnoticed as possible, dragging hysterically laughing Fuji with them.

Riki: "Wait in here; I am going to check if there is a safe way to you to come in there."

Rikimaru: "Can we knock her unconscious; it isn't against the Ninja rules, is it?"
Onikage: "We could, but I am enjoying your torturing far too much…"
Rikimaru: "I am going to knock her unconscious right now…"
Onikage: "No you are not."
Rikimaru: "Yes I am."

Tatsumaru gets bored and knocks both of them unconscious and Fuji stops laughing.

Tatsumaru: "Can you hear this wonderful voice?"
Others: ?
Tatsumaru: "Its silence…I can't even remember the last time I heard it."

Riki returns as Fuji starts laughing again, now rolling on the floor.

Riki: "Okay, art class is empty; now drag them in before music group end their training for this day. Oh, and stay in front of the class."
Ayame: "Why?"
Riki: "I explain later, music group leaves in any minute now."

Kiku obeys immediately and walks in the class. She doesn't want anybody to see her with such insane people as those two non-combatants in public.

Ayame: "Was it really necessary to knock them unconscious Tatsumaru? Now we have to drag all three of them in: Onikage, my worst enemy, Rikimaru … and that crazy person who apparently loves him!"
Tatsumaru: "I can take those two, you take her."

Tatsumaru grabs Onikage's and Rikimaru's legs and drags them over threshold and leaves them on the floor.

Riki: "Don't just leave them there; someone is going to walk over them!"

Tatsumaru looks angrily at Riki, but obeys her and lifts them on the teacher's table. Ayame pushes laughing Fuji to the class and Riki shuts the door behind them.

Riki: "Tatsumaru try to shut Fuji's mouth. We have to be quiet."

Tatsumaru places his hand to Fuji's mouth and whispers something to her ear, Fuji nods and stops laughing immediately.

Fifteen minutes later after the last one of the music group had left the building.

Riki: "What on earth did he say to you? I have tried many times to calm you down when you are in caffeine high, but I have never seen you calm so quickly."
Fuji: "He promised to teach me how to use sword if I would stop laughing."
Riki: "Oh…Should we try to find something that those two could drink with painkillers when they wake up."
Fuji: "Sure thing, I will give them a tour in the school and take something from the Clix (it's a name of their school's coffee automat), while you can steal some painkillers from school nurse's office."
Riki: "Let's go."

After the short tour Ayame, Kiku, Tatsumaru and Fuji finally reach the coffee automat. On its side is huge paper, where is written "Broken".

Kiku: "What are we going to do now?"
Fuji: "This."
Fuji hits the machine but it doesn't work.
Fuji: "Come on!"
Ayame: "Like that is going to help…"
Fuji hits it a little bit harder but with no success. Clix makes a low growling sound and then gives them silence for answer.
Fuji sighs: "Fine. Let's do it in the hard way then…"
Suddenly the coffee automat moves. Ayame draws Kiku behind her and Tatsumaru lifts his eyebrow for wonder.

The Clix stretches it self from the floor crowing 4 ft. tall. Every one seems to be even more shocked than they always are when Onikage returns from the death. Fuji is controlling the situation: Nothing in her expression shows a bit of astonishment.

The coffee automat jumps in the air and camera makes a 360 degree circle around it (like in Matrix). Fuji isn't going to be bossed around by a Clix. She jumps high in the air and the camera takes her 360 degree picture of her too. Fuji is quicker than the Clix, despite all that caffeine in it. She kicks the coffee automat in the Matrix-style and the automat falls down crushing against the wall behind it. Slowly the Clix admits its failure to keep all eatable inside and starts to work.

Fuji: "I knew it would work."

^^Mean while in the art class^^^

* Onikage's thoughts *

Onikage woke up in silence. In his sleep he had wrapped his arms around a figure next to him. Eyes still shut he snuggles closer to warm skin.

*Who is she…I can't remember…Did I fell asleep with that longer non-combatant –what-was-her-name-again- in the closet…Thought I can't remember was she this big…*

Eyes still shut Onikage gently touches his companions face, sliding his fingers along with other person's cheek.

*Her face is so soft…and she feels so good in other ways too…I wonder how her hair feels like. At least her long hair looks silky* Onikage thought remembering Riki with her Long brown hair.

Onikage runs his fingers trough his mate's hair.

*I knew it would feel silky, soft and …SHORT!*

Onikage's eyes flies open and the same moment Tatsumaru walks inside with others. Tatsumaru sees Rikimaru and Onikage sleeping with each others arms (He can't see Onikage's face cause the dead boy senior lays back towards the door).

Tatsumaru: "Well, that is a sight you can't see everyday."

Onikage leaps out off the table and starts to walking around and shouting himself:
"I am NOT like THAT!! I am NOT like THAT!! -...- NOT WITH HIM!!!! NOT WITH HIM!!!!!

Rikimaru wakes up in the noises: "What the hell is going on here?"
Tatsumaru: "That is what I would like to know also…"
Onikage: "NOTHING HAPPENED!!!"
Tatsumaru: "We witnessed it all…"
Onikage: ?!!!!
Tatsumaru: "Just kidding"

Onikage sighs in relief.

Tatsumaru: "But really, I didn't know you were gay."
Rikimaru: "? ... Excuse me …who? ...
Ayame: "How could you do this to me Rikimaru?"
Rikimaru: "Do what?!"
Ayame: "Have sex with Onikage!!"
Rikimaru: "!!!!! I am NOT gay, and for god's sake I HATE that cursed bastard!!"
Ayame: "But you have to admit that he is quite good looking."
Kiku: "I have to agree."
Ayame: "No, you are NOT gonna agree with me this time young lady."

Rikimaru's expression tells about wordless horror.

Riki returns to art class with painkillers.
Fuji: "Am I the only female here that thinks that Onikage is NOT good looking?"
Other females: "Yes."
Fuji: "All of you have to be blind…"
Riki: "Don't get me wrong, I still hate him from the bottom of my soul."
Fuji: "Whatever you say…"

Riki: "Now we have to find a way to get you back to the game world."
Ayame: "How we end up here anyway?"

Fuji tries to sneak out of the art class, but Rikimaru stops her.

Rikimaru: "Let me guess, all of this is your fault?"
Suddenly Fuji starts smiling her –please-do-not-kill-me-because-I-am-totally- innocent-smile-
Riki identifies Fuji's smile.
Riki: "Fuji, what have you done?"
Fuji: "I am not really sure. Well, I put the playstation together as I thought it should be done…Then you gave me a cup of that EXTRA strong morning coffee…and I may have accidentally spill it over…only a bit… on your playstation ..."
Riki mumbles furiously: "That's it…!"
Fuji: "And the next thing I know is that Onikage is coming out off the TV-screen, and the rest of the story you already know."
Riki: "Coffee maker flies out!"
Fuji: "NOOOO!"
Ayame: "Wait a minute. That doesn't help us at all!"
Fuji: "Listen to Ayame Riki. The destruction of coffee maker doesn't help them at all."
Riki: "But it will help me."
Ayame: Please don't fight…now…you (points at Riki) are the only sane person we know in here…So please wait until we are safely in our own world before you will become wacko."

Both Fuji and Riki ignores her completely, and then Riki takes a little coffee maker out of her backpack.

Rikimaru: "She has a coffee maker in her backpack …These non-combatants are crazy!"

Riki crushes the little coffee maker to the ground and says:
"I brought this with me that you some coffee, but you don't deserve to drink coffee never again!"

Fuji runs to the Rikimaru and takes his sword.
Rikimaru: "Damn that little non-combatant…she did it again."
Riki: "Tatsumaru can I borrow your sword for a little while it seems that my *Friend* wants to die."

^^In other end of the room^^


Onikage: "That's my girl. Piss off! Go Girlie. Go Girlie. Go Girlie!"
Kiku: "Girlie?"
Onikage: "I don't remember her name."

Riki: "MY name is RIKI! … So, Can I borrow it for a little while?"
Tatsumaru: "Sure."
Riki: "Thanks."

Rikimaru: "So, does Riki come from my name?"

But Riki doesn't hear Rikimaru's question she is too busy blocking Fuji's strikes, swinging Tatsumaru's sword like an expert…So, Onikage decides to answer Rikimaru's question.

Onikage: "Of course it doesn't, you fool."
Rikimaru: "I think it does."
Onikage: "No way."
Rikimaru: "Yes it does, and that means she likes me more than you."
Kiku [hopefully]: "Really?"
Tears glitter in Ayame's eyes as she asks: "Do you love her more than me, Rikimaru?"
Onikage: "It can't be! This is getting too weird … 1) Ninja likes my Riki and
2) Kunoichi loves ninja!"
Rikimaru: "I am just irritating him, Ayame."
Ayame: [sniff] "Oh."
Onikage: "Well, it didn't work ninja…I don't even like my Girlie!"

Riki (from the middle of battle with Fuji): "For your information; I don't like you either!"
Others (except Onikage): "Yeah right!"

Tatsumaru: "Hey! Guys you should see this."

Others turn around to see Fuji and Riki, still fighting. Fuji swings Rikimaru's katana towards Riki's head, but longer woman blocks her attack and immediately changed the movement to counter attack, Fuji darts her sword defending then attacking. Moving constantly back and forward, circling one another, jumping over the tables and avoiding certain parts of the floor, attacking and defending they were equally deadly and every movement they made, was punctuated by noise of steel blades clashing together.

Kiku: "Should we do something? I mean if they kill each other we can probably never go home."
Onikage: "No way! This is all my fault and I like to see the chaos that I create. (Performs a -Onikage–is-a-big-baddie-dance).
Kiku: "That other girl doesn't even like you. She thinks you look dead."
Onikage: "But I am."
Kiku: "Main point was that she DOESN'T like you."
Onikage: "Oh …"

Tatsumaru: "Ow! That must hurt!"
Rikimaru: "Go, longer non-combatant! … Wait should we call them non-combatants anymore? Because to me this looks like they can and will fight."
Ayame: "Who knows…"

Riki performs a weird variation of Rikimaru's shoulder thrust and Fuji flies across the room.

Onikage: "That's my girl! Finish her off!"
Rikimaru: "Yeah, and bring back my sword!"
Tatsumaru: "Are you two on the same side!?"
Rikimaru: "Are we?"
Onikage: "Well, that IS my Girlie…"
Rikimaru: "I just don't like that shorter one. She is always harassing me…"
Ayame: "She just wants your sword. Get it already!"
Rikimaru to Onikage: "Guess we are on the same side after all?"

Tatsumaru was playing dandy with tutu behind Rikimaru's back. He was trying to inform Onikage just how gay they were sounding…

Onikage: "No. We can't be. It is just …WRONG!"
Rikimaru: "But we are."
Onikage: "No, we aren't."
Rikimaru: "Yes, we are!"
Onikage: "Don't raise your voice to me, you don't even have your sword. …. Hey! You don't have your SWORD."

Onikage kills Rikimaru immediately.
Ayame: "You are dead man!"
Onikage: "You noticed it already?"
Ayame: "I mean literally."
Ayame cuts Onikage in half.

Kiku: "You will pay for that!"
She pokes Ayame at her little fist.

Tatsumaru to Fuji: "Hit her! Hit her! Hit her, you shorter criminal non-combatant!"
Fuji stops middle of her own attack and says to Riki: "There is no point in this."
Riki stops too: "What do you mean?"
Fuji points Tenchu characters that are killing each other.

Fuji: "If we won't stop soon, they are gonna end up dead, and now I mean for all eternity. I think there is a limited number of ninja rebirth items that you cab carry up with you."
Riki runs to Onikage, dropping Tatsumaru's sword on the floor. Fuji picks it up and walks to Tatsumaru. She hands Tatsumaru's sword to it's owner.

Fuji: "Here. I want to thank you for borrowing your katana to Riki. She would probably end up dead without it, and I would have regretted it afterward."
Tatsumaru: "Don't mention it."
Fuji: "Some time ago you promised that you would teach me how to use a sword… and because most of our gang is still dead we would have some time for that. I will even promise to give Izayoi back to Rikimaru as he wakes up if you will teach me…and I will make some coffee too."
Tatsumaru: "Okay, I will do it."

They go to the hallway to practice fighting.

^^Meanwhile^^

Riki: "Oh, you are in pieces!"
Onikage: "Don't worry I will pull my self together in no time…"
Riki runs her fingers trough Onikage's silky black hair lying beside him.

Rikimaru wakes up: "Where the hell is my sword?"
Ayame hugs him and says: "I was so worried! I wasn't sure did you have anymore ninja rebirth items with you."
Ayame and Rikimaru kiss passionately.
Kiku: "Oh, get a room people!"
Ayame (blushing): "Why, we don't need a room. We…eh…We are just friends."
Onikage: "Yeah, sure whatever you say."
Rikimaru: "Eh…It was just a mouth to mouth artificial respiration."
Kiku: "Really…I am SO sorry I didn't know…I think that I have too dirty imagination."

When Fuji and Tatsumaru ended up their lesson and Izayoi is back at Rikimaru Riki finally realizes that she is still sitting in Onikage's lap and rises up quickly.

Riki: "Back to the point: How to get you back to your own world before I loose my mind."
Fuji: "What about my mental health?!"
Riki: "You don't have one."
Fuji: "You are right…And I don't need one either, my –go-lucky-be-happy- attitude is enough … and coffee… Coffee is also very important."

Ayame: "Rikimaru have you ever thought that you could grow beard?"
Rikimaru: ?
Ayame still lying on top of him nipping his jaw: "It was just a thought."
Onikage: "Can I throw up already?"
Riki: "Not in here, something may blow up."
Tenchu characters: ?!!!!!
Fuji: "Well, This IS an art class you know."
Tenchu characters: ?!
Riki: Our art teacher's obsession with weapons has gone too far. Some parts off the floor are mined and we have at least seven machineguns, ten shotguns and one tank from the Second World War."
Tatsumaru: "So you were jumping over the mine field as you were fighting with Fuji. I wondered why you jumped over those parts of floor."
Fuji: "We are most of our breaks in here so we know every single trapdoor and mine in this room, at least if the teacher hasn't placed any new ones in here."
Riki: "When it's about your life people learn to watch their steps in very short amount of time…"
Fuji: "So the point was that, please don't start wandering here alone if you don't have a long stick or something…"

Riki: We have to get playstation, Wrath of Heaven and your memory card that we can try to get these guys back in there…Your friend from that little game shop, would probably let us borrow the shop's play station and the game so the only thing we need is the memory card … which is in my place. How do we get it from there, without noticing?"
Fuji: "Well I kind of took the memory card with me as we left … I put it in my jacket's pocket."
Riki: "Fuji, you are genius! Now we don't have to search it."
Fuji puts a hand on her jacket's pocket and says: "It isn't here…I must have dropped it somewhere on the way, but it isn't such a big thing, is it?"

The end of chapter 2

Author's note:
Fuji: "Chapter three is called *the Lady of the memory card* and it may come a little late and we may have to raise the rating from the pg-13 to R, because of our sick imagination…"
Riki: "Let's hope we don't have to… We are not going to write that stuff!…"
Fuji: "You can't always get what you hope…Do you remember the time when we started write this fic? To remind you this was supposed to be a short fic, like a thousand words… short fic!"
Riki: "I will get the last word… BYE BYE…!!"
Fuji: "Oh, and please review after reading!"
Riki: "Fuji!!"