Disclaimer- Lets get this straight, you all know I don't own a bloody thing….bugger…. so instead of saying all that crap I usually say I've decided to place the facts of life (no not those you perve) here.

The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.

Yes people it is true, have a look for your self.

 ~*Previously of ASBAON*~ The cave scene thingy when they bleed Elizabeth, Will saves Elizabeth and ONLY Elizabeth, Sam goes through all the pirates treasure, Sam meets up with Jack once again.

 ~*Final Line*~ "That would be the French." Smiled Jack.

TO My Wonderful reviewers

Lightning Rain – Yeah Louis might come back in the sequel (if any), and Jack most likely will try his luck, ya know he is a very lucky guy.

Whitedragoness – Thanks, I'll update ASAP

Cecilia Gray - yeah I try as often as possible to change the script but my brain just doesn't work…I'm…I'm…UNORIGINAL *Sobs on Legolas's shoulder* oh yeah I totally give the credit of the script to who ever wrote it and to where I found the script. I'm glad you reminded me about that, thanks a suggestion I can use *stands on swivelly chair and raises hands above her head and yells* TO MAKE MY STORY THE GREATEST IN THE WORLD HAHAHAHAHA…………WOOOWWWWHHHHH *Falls off chair, Legolas catches her* Thanks leggy-boy don't call me that why, its cute no it isn't Oh shoosh I let you out of your cage didn't I. BTW don't ya hate it when FFN doesn't log you in.

Dimonah Tralon – Ahhhh her personality, yes I like it too, its fun too write.

Linwen - Thanks, I like making people laugh.

Sweet A.K - *Laughs* Haldir the cheeky bugger, can't believe he did that, sorry bout ya friend but I mean it was only a little arrow and it almost hit them, right? So what's the problem? I've hidden all the coffee and it seems hand and 'the boys' are getting along good, hand is giving Jack a back rub at the moment. I'm sure you'll come up with an idea soon, just ask your reviews to help you, worked for me ;) and here is the update. I managed to get it done, I've been brainstorming ideas for a LOTR story, which will involve 2 girls who get thrown into M.E but not by kissing the screen or jumping through the theatre screen etc, it will be different to most (I hope), yeah I decided Liz would be bled because there is a twist to Sam, I wonder if anyone has figured it out yet? Hope not.

What did you say about Haldir?

Nothing   

Yes you did, you called him cheeky

So what? Do you have to know everything?

As much as possible

Look Legolas, if you go over there with the others and be quite I'll reward you with a sponge bath

Why thanky…Hang on a second reward me?

You're right I really meant reward me.

I will go, IF you buy me some wine

IF you let be give you a bath

No, if you buy me some wine I will not try to hurt you

No…*thinks* Ok BUT you have to wear this. *Hands him some Boxers that say 'Gift wrapped just for you'*

Ummm is there a shirt?

Oh no, no shirt, now go and change and I'll pop down the bottle-o and grab a wine.

*Mumbling* Better be the best bloody wine I've ever had.

Hehehe Where's my camera? 

HAPPY 2004 EVERYONE

I hope you all had a very happy, drunk New Years Eve…I DID and so did the elves, hehehe.

A STORY BY ANY OTHER NAME

(BY THE WAY anything like this is the person thinking. OK)

Will and Elizabeth reached the Interceptor and started to board when something suddenly occurred to Elizabeth.

"Will, what about Sam?" Elizabeth asked grabbing hold of Will's leg as he was climbing up the ladder.

"She'll be fine" Will said shaking off Elizabeth and climbing up the ladder, 'I hope she will be alright. What am I saying of course she will be alright but I wonder if the pirates will be alright? Hehehe Oh but she is my sister and Elizabeth's best friend and now it will make Elizabeth sad if Sam is left there……'

"Will…Will…WILL!!!" Elizabeth was standing behind Will on the ladder; Will had stopped in the middle of the ladder while he was thinking.

"Oh sorry" he mumbled and continued up the ladder. Once he reached the top of the ladder he was greeted by Gibbs.

"Hey Boy, Where be Jack?" He asked as Will grabbed Elizabeth's hand and started to lead her away.

"He fell behind"

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Meanwhile in the Cave they were still standing around looking at Jack, something Sam wasn't getting board at doing.

"How the blazes did you get off that island?" Barbossa Asked looking at Jack.

"When you marooned me on that godforsaken spit of land, you forgot one very important thing, mate. I'm Captain Jack Sparrow." Jack smiled.

"Hmmmm that you are" Mumbled Sam catching Jack's Smile and returning it with a sultry one of her own. The pirates continued to banter back and forth; Sam while in her daze managed to capture a few words here and there such as "blood". This little adventure was kinda starting to freak her out but she wasn't going to let any one know that. She would rather continue to gaze at Jack until it was time to leave, and even then she was going to make sure that he was in her eye line. Suddenly she felt the shove from the pirate holding her and became suddenly aware that they were leaving. They got outside the caves where the boats sat without their oars, Barbossa then ordered to the more athletic pirates that they had to swim out and gather up the oars so that they could get back to the ship. They waited about half-an-hour before they made their way back to the ship; Sam even managed to get a seat next to Jack.

"So why do you wear eyeliner?" Sam asked Jack who answered with a smile.

"Why do you think?"

"I think you wear it because it makes you ruggedly handsome, either that or gay" Smiled Sam

"Well I think I would much rather the first answer 'cause I ain't the other one" Jack looked slightly shocked.

"That's true 'cause I've heard that you are very much a womaniser"

Jack looked at her with a smile "What do you think?" he asked as he slipped an arm around her.

"I think that it would take a lot more than your famous moves to make a pass at me" She laughed and slipped his arm around the pirate that was sitting next to her and she moved so that she sat across from him. She gave him a cheeky smile and he answered with a chuckle of his own, the pirate that was now next to Jack looked quite frightened and then excited that Jack had his arm around him and grabbed his hand and kissed it, Jack noticed this and snatched his hand back, causing Sam to laugh so hard she almost fell out of the boat.

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The Interceptor continued to sail along at a rather fast pace. In one of the cabins sat Will and Elizabeth. Will was bounding Elizabeth's hand.

"You said you gave Barbossa my name as yours. Why?" Will said 'how do I tell her that I love her'

"I don't know maybe because I …um…you…um…Sam was there." 'Great answer, just say it, and tell him the real reason…OW!' She pulled her hand away

"I'm sorry. Blacksmith's hands - I know they're rough." 'Stupid hands, maybe I should borrow Sam's cream stuff'

"No…I mean yes, they are but… but don't stop." 'Please don't stop, I want those hands all over me, I want you, I really want you, take the invitation, if what Sam said is right you should know what I'm talking about…oh god I sound like Sam!'

"Elizabeth." 'C'mon go for it, just lean in and kiss her, there was an invitation there, you had to be stupid not to see it'

"It's yours." Elizabeth said pulling back 'What am I doing, come on body lean back in, OH no he is leaning back, shit the moment's gone'

"I thought I'd lost it the day they rescued me. It was a gift from my father. He sent it to me. Why did you take it?" 'Oh God, I hope she took it to remember me, but why give it back now?'

"Because; I was afraid that you were a pirate. That would have been awful." 'Because you're so dam good looking and it would have been a waste, now forget that and KISS ME!'

"It wasn't your blood they needed. It was my father's blood…my blood…the blood of a pirate." 'Maybe Sam was right, maybe she is a kleptomaniac? Awww crap, now I'm gonna die, Stupid Dad, you know what; really it is all Jack's fault, yeah that's right him AND Sam. Dammit the moment's gone'

"Will, I'm so sorry, please forgive me." 'I really am, come on Will, don't be angry, be loving…AHHHH…psycho' Will Slams the medallion on the table and Elizabeth gets up and leaves him there.

'OHHH Crap, Please come back, I'm really not angry at you…no…I'm angry at Sam. Maybe she should stay with the pirates, gets her out of my ear, But she is my sister and I have an obligation to look after her, even though she is older and much better at stuff than me and makes sure that I know it and always teases me about Elizabeth and hides my pants…hang on she can Bloody well look after herself. Besides Jacks with her now…………OHHH NNNOOO Jack and Sam, Sam and Jack…Shit' Will proceeded to slam his head on the table as he thought about what Jack and Sam were doing right now.

*************************************************************************************

Jack was siting in the Captains cabin talking to Barbossa about…Stuff, Sam meanwhile was playing with Jack (The monkey, you dirty person).

"Come ere boy, that's a good monkey, now get that apple and I'll give you a ring" Said Sam who was sitting on the floor teaching the monkey to do stuff like fetch, etc.

"Good monkey" Sam crooned "Now here's your ring, here I'll put it on for you" she slipped the golden ring around the monkey's tail. "Who's a pretty monkey, who's a pretty monkey, you're a pretty monkey, yes you are" At this point Sam noticed that both the captain and Jack were staring at her funny. "What?" She asked.

"Why you talkin' like that?" Jack asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Like what?" Sam asked innocently "Hoogy Boogy Googy" Sam started to rub the monkey's belly.

"LIKE THAT" hollered Jack pointing strangely at Sam.

"I'm just talking to the monkey, Ya know if you talk to animals like that it either Excites them or frightens them, and he is excited so I am teaching him stuff while yous talk, so if ya don't mind I'd like to get back to work" She smiled at the two men.

"O.K. but why ya wearing all ME treasure?"  Barbossa asked grabbing the crown of Sam's head. Sam stood up and in reply grabbed the crown off Barbossa and placed it back on her head.

"Because it looks good on ME" She said with a smile sitting back down with the monkey.

"That it does luv that it does" Jack said eyeing her off.

"Nice try, Captain Sparrow, you'll have to try harder for my affections" Sam said not even looking up from what she was doing, which was teaching the monkey to back flip. "Good Boy, here have a ruby"

"Captain, we're coming up on the Interceptor." Bo'sun said as he entered, giving Sam menacing looks which she returned standing up looking the pirate in the face.

"You got a problem, bead boy?" Sam growled.

"Yeah, you being alive" he growled in return. Barbossa and Jack got up and started to make their way over before anything could happen.

"Ya wanna go at it again? HUH?" She said.

"Yeah, bring it on" he said and jabbed her in her bandaged shoulder. Sam screamed in pain and clutched her shoulder and Bo'sun laughed at her and walked out but a second later Jack had to physically restrain her from following the large pirate.

"Hey, hey calm down, luv. What happened ere then?" Jack said setting her down on the deck and pointing to the shoulder wound.

"Nuthin" she mumbled

"Don't look like nuthin" He said, he went to have a look but remembered about Barbossa. He jogged up to where he was standing bringing Sam along reluctantly. They continued to talk about something that Sam wasn't interested in but what she did notice was the ship not very far away. She knew that ship, it was the Interceptor. 'Oh so that's what Bead freak said' she thought.  All of a sudden she felt a rough hand push her in the other direction.

"Throw them in the Brig" Barbossa Said. She knew something was going to happen and she wanted to be around for it but for now it seems that Jack managed to get them locked up in the brig.

*****************************************************************************************************

"I really don't believe you, 2 seconds on this ship and you manage to get us thrown in the brig, I've been here more than a week or somethin and had managed to not get thrown in here" Sam said as she paced the cage in which held them. "Ya know I've never been caught ever, Slapping Norrington, stealing his wig, leaving cow dung in his jacket pocket, stealing his sword, pretending to be him and ordering his troops to attack and capture all these citizens…" she continued to name all these things she seemed to have only done to Norrington.

"Ya know they are very small things, Pranks as it would seem" Jack said as he sat on the bed.

"Yeah but doing it to the Commodore of the British fleet or what ever he is, he makes sure you know your treading on find lines. Stupid, pompous old prick. GRRRR" Sam said kicking the water that was around her feet.

"Why don't you come over here and I'll get rid of all that tension" Jack said suggestively.

"HMMM ummm no sorry I'm going to have to decline" Grinned Sam, Jack smiled back.

"Then how about you tell me how you came about that wound on your shoulder"

"I told you, its nuthin" Sam said she said lightly touching it and wincing as she did.

"Com' ere let me 'ave a look see" Jack said standing up as Sam came and sat down. He gently pulled the bandage off, a hiss of pain escaped from her lips.

"Hmmm, it'll take a while to heal, but it's clean. This bandage won't do though, tis covered in blood. Here" he started to rip of the bottom of his already tattered shirt off and wrap it around the wound.

"Now ya gonna tell me its nuthin? I know a sword wound when I see one" he asked as he finished up and sat next to her. She told him everything that happened from when she first got into the fight with Bo'sun to the duel they had below deck.

"…I feel really cheated; I mean I have never been beaten before. And it's something I never want to experience again; I'm not going to stop until I get my revenge." Sam said suddenly aware of Jack's arm around her waist. "And Jack you are a step closer but your not that close" she said peeling it off.  

"Just tryin' to be comforting" He murmured into her ear, Sam grinned and stood up, it's not that she wasn't interested, who wouldn't be, this was Captain Jack Sparrow, one of the hottest pirates in the Caribbean, but she wasn't going give in with out a fight.

"Don't sound like you were beaten, sounds like an unfinished fight" He said leaning back against the wall.

"And I plan to finish it, as soon as they do this curse thingy, I'll be right there to make sure to finish it."

"I thought you weren't listenin' to anythin' we said" Said Jack looking stunned.

"Hey I pay attention, more than you know" she said, jumping at the sudden noise of cannon fire. "It seems it has started" turning to Jack with a smile.  

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SOOOOO you think I'm hot.

I didn't say that

Yes you did right there

It's a story, besides I thought you where having a back rub?

I was but I came over to find out why the Elves got bloody wine and I didn't get no rum?

You didn't ask

Well I'm asking now

Hmmmm what can you do to get some rum? Hmmmm oh Here you go I've got an assignment for you.

What is it?

Do you know who Orlando Bloom is?

Some pansy you like no doubt

HE IS NOT A PANSY!!!

Ok, OK, OK Calm Down *Holds hands up in defence*

*puts chair back down from above her head* Ok I would like it very much if you could try to find him, and if you do there will be 5 bottles of rum for you when you get back.

OK *runs out the door*

HHHMMMMMWWWWAAAHAHAHAHAHA soon I will have all the hotties that the world has ever heard of. Dam Georgina; get outta my head.

*hiccup* Watchya doing?

Nothing Legolas, how do you find the boxers?

Strangely comfortable

Yeah I know they are nice aren't they.

Where did you get them?

Some…one left them here

Oh Who?

No one, how is your wine?

*pouts* Elladen and Elrohir have taken it from me.

Oh poor Leggy *Gives him a hug* Here, this is just for you *produces a new bottle of wine from desk draw*

OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHH thankyou *Gives a kiss on the cheek, then bows and walks off*

Ahhhhhhhh I love it when he does that *faints*