Disclaimer- Lets get this straight, you all know I don't own a bloody thing….bugger…. so instead of saying all that crap I usually say I've decided to place the facts of life (no not those you perve) here.
The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.
Apparently Marlboro is a cigarette company, now that's what you call ironic!
~*Previously of ASBAON*~ Sam and Jack spend some "quality" time in da nest, Gillette had a whinge, quality drunk time with the crew.
~*Final Line*~ - Sam only gave a snore in reply.
Hmmm I feel so bad that I haven't updated but school's bitch, so much work so little time, Plus I had all these "things" to do this weekend, I can't say because I had to lock me boys up while I was out other wise they get into trouble.
To My Wonderful Reviewers
Sweet A.K – Hehehe yeah I liked the idea of panda Jack, actually that's the reason why I only wear mascara when I'm going out now, before I used to wear it too school…big mistake, my friends always make me laugh so hard I start to cry and well you can see the results, YEAH DRUNKEN SAILOR IS THE MADDEST SONG *gives high 5* You must teach it to Faramir and Haldir!!! *pouts* my elves refuse to sing it; they say it is "inferior" to their songs…PISH. Yes drunk Sam, I must say, acts like drunk me…or so I'm told, I'm a good drinker *nods, elves give disbelieving looks* what? I am…I think…anyway. Good I think they should be a little afraid of you because other wise they will run wild…like my lot!! Ahhh it IS even better when you comfort them afterwards, I agree totally *wink, wink, cough* Yeah I was kinda angry at them for a while but I got back at them, you'll see what happened below!! Ahhh I hate boo-boos I get heaps from sport *points at the elves* kiss our BOO-BOOS!!! *they run off and hide* you know what!?! I think that they have this secret hiding spot somewhere in my house and I don't know where it is!!! I must find it!!! Hmm I really want to get this update up and running but it's so hard to find extra time to do it, JEBUS, school is so evil and it has taken me a whole like 2 hours to respond to all these reviews (which I LURVE by the way), and, and *breaks down, but recovers with a PS (Pixie Stix)* I'm ok now, slight break down, all I have to remember is that Schoolies is coming soon and I get to party non stop for a month!!!!!! YAY I CAN'T WAIT, but for now I must find their hiding spot, Toodle-oo!!
Amanda – Wow what a coincidence…so am I, and boy do I hate the work load! YAYAYAYAYAY I MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY!!! Yeah I like the little before and after fics, NUH don't bother with work…YES BOTHER WITH WORK…Shuddup Leggo…anyway enjoy!!! YAYAYAYAYAY PIXIE STIX how great are they!!! *grabs bag of PS* THANKYOU!!! What do you have? Nothing! What do you have?!? *reaches for bag* NOTHING!!!! *bites hand* AHHH you psycho!!! Damn Right!!!
EMILY – HEHEHE hello new reviewer…I'm glad you like the story, the more people that enjoy it the happier I am!!! PLZ CONTINUE
LotRseer3350 – Hmmm I know, I'm hating Chem this year too, I swear maybe I shouldn't have chosen all the hard subjects but as long as I get a good enough mark to get into Uni then I'm happy. *LOL* I think I can handle the twins but when Dimonah Tralon is finished with Jack, you may borrow him if you like!! You make him sound as though he is an object! Weelllll he likes to travel and I don't think keeping him cooped up in here is very fair What about us!?! *swings a watch slowly* But…You…Like…it…here…Elladen Yes…we…like…it…here…hhheeeyyy don't do that! Hehehe ANYHOW don't be embarrassed about a little thing like that, no!... be embarrassed about something like…*Blushes*…putting on a sheer tank top accidentally because you're in such a rush and then finding out that you're wearing it by a bunch of footy guys' whistles and yells as you're running past!!! That's embarrassing!!! …Yeah Gillette is a razor, I had a Gillette woman's razor once but I have now moved on to INTUITION *starts to sing Intuition by jewel* but you don't care bout that do ya…OH yeah I'd better hurry up and save Will, I think it will be a funny reaction…is there any other and No my name isn't Sam it is…*Legolas takes the keyboard* You are not aloud to say that *gives it back* ok I will not say that my name is … *takes it back* I'm not falling for that one again, now promise me that you will not say it, swear on…on…YOUR PIXIE STIX *Gives it back* OOOHHHH *growls* your mean!
Branded: BadEgg4Evaa – Thanks for liking my story but I think we need to have a little talk. Ok, I really hate being mean…just like you to know that…BTW I'm not trying to be mean, BUT I don't think that you really made that up because I have read HEAPS, I'm talking thousands, of FanFics *in the background you have no life* I have more of a life then you do so Shuddup anyway you are not the only one to have Legolas, Jack, etc…the way I see it is that there are many copies of our favourite characters just waiting to be used in some lucky person's fic as their muses, Eg. Legolas 228908134854590, Elrohir 7789 and Elladen 7790 (my Elves) and Jack 777880013835 …*smiles* but that's just me!! But on a much happier note…WWWWWWEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WOOT, WOOT, YEAH!!! *DANCING* I'm one of the best; I'm one of the best NO YOUR NOT SHUDDUP!! Anyway I'm glad that even though you don't like the mini story thing, you like it……*Looks confusingly at last sentence* or something like that…anyway you don't have to read them if you don't want, they are just my mindless ramblings!!! I'm sorry if you found anything I said mean and if you did, I shall spank Legolas for making me say it WHAT? Nothing
Dimonah Tralon – Well since the pirates sort of die and disappear at the end, I decided to make Gillette the creepy guy that hangs around, cause he kinda does freak me out…That's good, I hope Jack is taking care of you *Wink, Wink* keep him as long as you need him, and he'd better be helping you, tell him that if he doesn't his little boat will go bye-bye *holds up picture of Black Pearl over the toilet*…hmmm I think I can hear his screams from here!!!
Elven-Water-Nymph-Wilwarin – Funky Name…that took a while to write, AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH THE COOLEST!!! THE COOLEST POTC FIC YOU'VE EVER READ, hear that and you doubted me *shakes review in Leggy's face*
Evenescent Dreams – Hmm glad you like the way the story is going…I'm actually not sure where the story is going my self but Oh well…hang on should I know that???, Jack was warned that if he broke that boat that he would be glomped by you, then he asked what that meant and if it was the way he was seeing it in his mind, I told him he'd find out if he broke that boat…ship, Oh and Leggens has a message for you…Don't call me Leggens…*Cough* Dearest Bianca, thankyou very much for you wonderful gift, it has given me hours of pleasure...*Giggles in background*…Not like that, you dirty girl, I have been annoying Elladen and Elrohir with it's shooting arrows and they are now asking if they have little figurines like I do…Aus has already told them no, I think they were about to cry…hmm Aus is poking me with a pen so I will go now, sincerely Legolas prince of *pushes him away*…MY HEART MMMWWWAAAHHAHAHAHAHA *cough* that is not what I said…*gags him* Shuddup
Zeldagrl436 – Ok I will just for you *Muffled cries of help are heard* you heard nothing!!
M.BENTALL2K – tis cool mate, and yes I am Leggo obsesso but who isn't, thanks for your site suggestion, TIS AWESOME, I will be careful wiv da stories, but a little Leggy torture here or there is…interesting *muffled cries of* HEY *are heard* Shuddup you *pokes him with a stick*, anyway your email freaked me out a bit cause I though it might be some scary virus or something, glad it was you though.
92 REVIEWS PEPS LETS TRY AND GET TO 100!!!..............................PLEASE
Hehehe I was this close (_) to snoggin Leggy boy but bloody Elrohir saw me smile, he got his though…MMMWWWAAAHHAHAHAHAHA *cough*
If you keep doing that you are going to lose your voice!
Really?
Yes Elladen used to do it Then he couldn't speak for a week
Hmmm? Maybe I should stop then?
Sounds like a plan
I know I'll just do this *makes a mental parrot/raptor noise*
Please don't
When are you going to untie him?
G'day Elladen, when I want to *looks at leggy* or until he decides to strip for me and my readers, which ever comes first *Leggy shakes his head and mumbles Fat chance*
A Story By Any Other Name
Sam sat on the bow of the ship with Jack standing behind her with his arms wrapped casually around her waist.
"I have a headache" Sam wined, Jack started to rub her temples
"Poor Luv, any excuse eh?" Jack laughed as she pushed him slightly; they continued to watch the island come into view.
"When do you think we will reach the island?" She said leaning back into Jack's chest.
"By nightfall at the most" he said staring at the growing island.
"Hmmm, do you think…that…Will do you reckon he is alright?" Sam sighed; Jack looked down at her sad face.
"Luv, If I've learnt anythin from ye brudda, then it's that he is mighty tough" Jack gave a soft smile.
"I hope you are right…well he is quite tough but mainly persistent, I remember this one time when we were younger, Will got his first sword and no matter how many times he cut himself, he would keep practicing until he got it right…or I took the sword from him and cut his hair…which ever came first" Laughed Sam.
"Ye are a real destructive one ain't ye?" Jack returned the laugh
"Only when it counts…" Sam looked behind Jack "Here comes trouble"
"Sparrow, Commodore wants you on deck" Gillette stated looking only at Sam who gave him a blank look in return.
"Hmmm really?" Jack cocked an eyebrow at him then lifted Sam off the railing and set her on the deck next to him. "Why don't ye go and see what Elizabeth's up to?" Sam smiled goofily at him.
"Okey dokey pokey" Jack laughed and pulled her up to meet his lips, Jack could see Gillette's disgusted look out of the corner of his eye. They continued their kiss until the very angry voice of Norrington called Jack from across the deck; Jack reluctantly pulled away and strode off towards the helm. Sam watched him walk off, ogling his bum as he walked.
"I don't see why an upstanding woman such as yourself, would let your standards drop" Gillette snarled at Sam, who looked blankly at him
"HUH?" she asked.
"Why have a…a…pirate instead of an upstanding gentlemen such as myself?" Gillette asked crossing his arms and moving closer, Sam looked at him and then at Jack who was arguing with one of the guards.
"Umm let me see……NO!" she said and stalked off towards the cabins, Gillette followed her slightly confused
"No, what do you mean by no? That didn't even answer my question!" Gillette reached for her arm to turn her around but she was quicker, she grabbed his arm and twisted it behind his back and got him in a headlock.
"Now listen here. 1. I choose who I want to be with, 2. You are ugly, 3. Jack is hot, 4. You are ugly, 5. I am soooo not upstanding…I think, and 6. You are GAY! Understand now leave me in peace" Sam growled and pushed him away and made towards the cabin.
"You will not hear the last of this, do you understand me" Gillette gasped at her as she opened the door and stepped inside.
"I really doubt that, hopefully someone will stick a carrot up your butt and you will fall overboard but until then I can only hope that you will…how do I put this nicely…depart this mortal realm" she said from inside the doorway
"You want me to die!" he asked shocked, Sam stuck her head out the doorway and added
"That or you leave…which ever comes first" and with that she closed the door.
*********************************************************************************************
"Ding dong, Bing bong, CHING CHONG" Sam bounded over to Elizabeth who was looking out the window.
"And why do you have so much energy?" Elizabeth laughed at Sam's bouncing form.
"Well…I just assaulted Gillette and…" but before she could finish Elizabeth stood up with a shocked expression etched on her face.
"You WHAT?" She shouted at Sam who was now bouncing on her bed watching as Elizabeth started to pace.
"Wassup Lizzy?" she asked innocently as she continued to bounce but feeling a sharp pain in her foot, she plopped herself down on the bed and proceed to pull off her dark green boot. "Ooohhhh looky, shiny" Sam said as she fingered the dagger she had produced from the boot.
"What's up? You know very well what's up. Gillette may just have you hung… or just to prove a point have Jack hung! Sam…Sam are you even listening to me?" She watched Sam as she continued to play with the dagger; finally she decided to take it off her before she could hurt herself. But as she reached for it, Sam suddenly pulled away and growled.
"My shiny" Elizabeth pulled her hand back in fright and stared at Sam with a frightened expression only to find Sam looking back at her with her face full of laughter, it took a while for Elizabeth to clam herself down and try not to kill Sam where she sat. Once she had enough self control she tried to get Sam to put her dagger back in her boot so that she would not hurt herself. This proved much harder than she had once thought.
"BUT IT'S PRETTY!"
"No it's dangerous"
"PRETTY and oh soooo shiny"
"Sam; you will hurt yourself, now please give it here"
"BUT IT'S MINE; HUNKY LOUIS GAVE ME IT, NOT YOU, ME, ALL MINES!!"
"Now what would Jack say if he heard that?"
"Probably where's the rum? Or 'Ello Luv, Fancy a bit ol' ye and me time"
"Yes he probably would say something like that"
"You see I am perfectly capable of handling a sharp object now" Starts to spin the dagger extremely fast between her fingers.
"No, stop it, Now give me it" Elizabeth snatches for the dagger.
"MINE…OOOOOOOWWWWW" Sam grabs the dagger back only to find out that she wasn't holding the handle.
"Oh look what you've done now, let me see" Elizabeth took Sam's bleeding hand, and started to bandage it.
"Why do I always get hurt?" Sam asked, Elizabeth dropped Sam's newly bandaged hand and looked her in the face
"Because you are stupid" Sam's jaw dropped
"Lizzy, you aren't meant to say that" Elizabeth laughed at Sam's shocked expression
"What can I say, hanging around you all the time, it brings the bad side in me…out!"
They both erupted in giggles, if only they knew that this may be the last time they giggled uncontrollably like that…for a long time.
~*~*~*~*~**~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Now what do I mean by that I wonder???
I'm so sorry I haven't updated in ages, but life is sooooooo hectic, makes me wanna cry *thinks about it* NUH, much easier to eat Pixie Stix anyway. *Eats 5 in a row* MUCH BETTER *Elladen comes in to find AUS's eyes starting to glaze over*
EVERYONE WATCHOUT SHE'S HAD SUGER!!!!!!
RRRRAAAAAAAAAAKKKKKKKKK *Retarded mental parrot/raptor noise* Here elfy, elfy, elfy……Excuse me I have to go on an elf hunt!!! *leaves and switches all the power to the lights off*
*A shadowy figure comes up to the computer* Please help us, it isn't pleasant when she has had suger, *Scuttling noise in the shadows* Oh my Valar…I'm… so… scared… right… now, I do not know what she will do to me, and I can not protect myself…she…she has taken all our weapons*Scuttling noise even closer* She has taken the left hallway and the dining room, her giggles are deafening,*SCUTTLING NOISE VERY CLOSE* she is coming, SHE IS COMING!!!!!!!! *Looks over his shoulder into the shadows as giggles erupt from right behind him, he turns to see a shadowy AUS crouched on the desk next to the computer behind him*
Hello Legolas Dear …
*POUNCE*
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH