CHAPTER TEN: Scar Tissue
It wasn't the best Saturday for a trip to Hogsmeade. The wind was picking up and a light drizzle had started to fall by the time they had reached the all-wizarding community.
The weather did not dampen Harry's spirits much though. As much as he loved Hogwarts it was good to get away from it every once in awhile. They'd been in school a month and this was the first weekend they'd had away from it. Even Hermoine was enjoying the fresh, yet chilly air, and her good mood was probably what kept her and Ron from getting into another row when he mentioned he hadn't started his Transfiguration assignment that was due on Monday. When she didn't pick a fight out of that, Ron's mood became cheerful as well.
Ginny was with them, and Ron had not brought up the subject of her coming since that day in Lupin's class. Whatever had been up his arse that day it seemed he had gotten over it.
They made their way through the small village, stopping by each of their favourite shops in turn. Ron was going on about the new Quidditch supply store that had recently opened, when Hermione suggested, "why don't we split up then? I'll go with Ron, and how about we meet up at the Three Broomsticks later?"
"What are we splitting up for?" Ron protested, slightly confused. "Harry wants to see the new Quidditch store too."
And Harry did, but he had a feeling Hermione had an ulterior motive for splitting them up.
"Harry has some early Christmas shopping he wants to get done," she said sending a meaningful look Harry's way.
"Christmas is more than three bloody months away!" Ron exclaimed.
"Don't swear," she chided him. "And not everyone leaves their shopping til the day before," she said, raising her eyebrows at him.
"Fine, have fun shopping, mate," he said, facing his friend. "But you don't know what you're missing."
With his arm around Hermione, the two of them left in the general direction of where the Quidditch store was located.
"Well, that was odd," said Ginny when it was just the two of them standing there.
Harry had to agree. He was going to have a talk with Hermione when they got back if she was leaving them alone for the reasons he thought she was. If that turned out to be the case Lavender and Pavarti were really starting to become a bad influence on her.
Ginny turned to him. "Do you really have shopping to do?"
"Er, no," he answered.
"We can go to the Quidditch place if you want," she said with a shrug. "I don't mind."
"It's okay," he told her. "I can see it another time. Besides," he added with a grin, "I'm sure Ron will give me a fully detailed description of it when we meet up with them later, so it'll be like I was actually there."
They started walking in the opposite directions as Ron and Hermione, passing by other students and shops.
"Where are we going?" Harry asked.
"How about we just walk for now?" She suggested.
He nodded his agreement. A walk sounded like a good idea, even though the rain had picked up a bit and the sky looked ready to unleash a storm at any moment.
"I've seen you in the library a lot." He felt rather stupid after he said it. It was probably the most boring conversation he could have started, but Ginny didn't seem to mind.
"I have this research project I'm working on," she explained. "It's taking a lot of my time."
It wouldn't be the last project that would occupy a lot of her time, Harry thought to himself. In Transfiguration class alone last year, McGonagall had given them three assignments to do at once, claiming she was preparing them for next year.
"How have you been sleeping?" She asked carefully.
"Fine," he answered, his feet splashing through a puddle.
"You forget that I grew up with six older brothers. I learned how to tell when they were lying pretty quickly."
He wanted to snap at her that his dreams were none of her business, but she sounded genuinely concerned so he didn't.
"I just have a lot going on in my head right now," he chose to say instead.
"I'm here, you know, whenever you want to talk."
Just like that she let the topic of his sleepless nights drop. The way she didn't probe him made him want to tell her. If anyone knew what it was like to have vivid nightmares it was her. If anything, he should have been asking her how she got through it. But the subject of it seemed so personal he couldn't bring himself to ask her.
"I see you're just going lower and lower with the company you keep, Potter."
Malfoy was exciting the shop they had just passed, his usual smug expression plastered to his face. Crabbe and Goyle were beside him, arms folded over their chest, trying to look intimidating. Maybe if they didn't look so oafish it would have had the desired effect.
Harry balled his hands into fists inside the pockets of his robes. Why did Malfoy have to be there? Harry knew without question Malfoy's plan was to ruin his Hogsmeade trip to the best of his abilities.
"You've traded down from the mudblood slut to the poor hand-me-down's girl."
Harry knew he would be doing himself a favour if he just kept walking, but like Ron, he was so sick of having to deal with Malfoy's crap on a daily basis. He had just done a better job of keeping his temper in check over the years.
"Sod off, Malfoy. Or is tormenting people the only hobby you have?" Harry said coolly.
"Harry, let's go," Ginny said from his side. "He's not worth it,"
"You should be telling yourself that, little girl."
It was far from the worst insult Harry had heard come out of the Slytherin's mouth over the years, but that didn't stop him from advancing on Malfoy and shoving him hard to the ground. Crabbe and Goyle were so stunned they just stood there.
"What the hell is your problem, Potter?" Malfoy snarled at him. He picked himself up, his robe soaked with mud and water, and started towards Harry, fists at the ready. "I think it's time someone brought hero-boy down a few notches."
Crabbe and Goyle had come out of their stunned state by that point. Cracking their knuckles threateningly, they proceeded towards Harry from each side.
Seeing what was in danger of happening, Ginny got in front of Harry and put her hands on his chest to push him back. "This is stupid. Don't do this. You don't have anything to prove to him."
"Letting your girlfriend fight your battles for you?" Malfoy mocked him. "That's a change."
Harry moved out of Ginny's grasp but instead of heading for Malfoy, he took off down the street at a lightning fast pace, ignoring the derisive laughter sounding from behind him.
He felt Ginny grab his arm and pushed her off. If he hadn't been so angry he would have apologized for shoving her so roughly.
"Harry, stop!" she cried.
"I'm doing what you asked," he said, keeping up his brisk pace. "I'm walking away so I don't push his head through a window like he deserves."
"You're acting like a child."
That made him stop. He came up so close to her that she could practically feel the heat radiating from him. "You should have stayed out of it. I don't need you to fight my battles for me."
"Harry, if it wasn't for me you'd still be back there getting your face rearranged by those three!" She shouted, not backing down.
"I could have taken them," he insisted.
"I thought that you had more commons sense then what you showed back there," she said with a frustrated air. "But you really are just like every other guy once the testosterone kicks in."
She could think what she wanted as far as he was concerned. If she wanted to label him like that, he honestly didn't care. Malfoy had pissed him off too much to care. "I'm not going to apologize for shoving Malfoy and giving him a fraction of what he deserved. Hermione should have let Ron pummel him that day in the bookstore, so he would be in a bloody body cast in St. Mungo's instead of here."
Face livid with anger, Harry stalked off. He couldn't stand to have Ginny stare at him in absolute disappointment a second longer. He was already disappointed with himself enough for the both of them.
The excitement that always accompanied the trips to Hogsmeade had long since worn off for Ginny. The first two hours had been wonderful – then Malfoy had showed up and wrecked everything. He had been as vile as always, and if his goal had been to ruin the Hogsmeade trip for her and Harry then he succeeded hands down.
She had never seen Harry so full of rage that it frightened her more than she cared to admit. She had dealt with Ron's temper on many occasions, but Harry's seemed to be a different one altogether, like it was years of pent up frustration finally breaking through. She knew about his horrible childhood and everything that had been forced on him since then. No one of any age should have to live with that kind of responsibility on their shoulders. But Harry did, and he carried that weight around with him every day of his life. Part of that was what had attracted her to him in the first place. He was so noble and caring that she couldn't help but admire him. But underneath all that selflessness and compassion, were scars – scars that were just beginning to break through.
She had ended up at the Three Broomsticks alone hours later, hoping that Harry would already be there, but she had only found Ron and Hermione. She had considered making up something, but in the end decided to tell them the truth knowing Malfoy had probably spent all afternoon telling anyone who would listen a severely exaggerated version of the events.
Ron seemed happy that at least his best mate had gotten a chance to physically harm Malfoy, but the grin was wiped off his face when Hermione elbowed him in the side, telling him that it wasn't a laughing matter. If Malfoy went to Snape Harry would be in serious trouble.
When it was finally time to head back, the sky had cleared and the rain that had followed them all day had stopped. Ginny found it funny that after the lousy Hogsmeade trip the weather was turning out nice.
When they reached the castle, they found Harry sitting on the steps waiting for them. Ginny could see he was a great deal calmer now, showing none of the fury he had displayed hours earlier.
"You okay mate?" Ron said to him. "Malfoy's telling everyone you jumped him in a blind rage and that Crabbe and Goyle had to throw you off him. Too bad that's not the real story – ow!"
He rubbed his side where Hermione had elbowed him.
"Can you give us a minute?" Harry said, standing up.
It took a moment for Ron to realize he was talking about Ginny.
"We'll see you inside," Hermione said, taking the initiative in walking up the stairs and bringing Ron with her.
Harry waited until they were both gone before speaking. He was staring at his shoes when he spoke. "Before, I didn't mean to lose it like that," he began. "I'm sorry if I hurt you."
"I'll live," she said with a shrug. She fought down the urge to shiver at remembering the almost violent matter in which Harry had shoved her away.
He was ashamed of how he had acted, but he didn't know what else to say to make it any better. He had ruined her Saturday for the sole satisfaction of seeing Malfoy's enraged face when he had pushed him to the ground.
"It wasn't the Hogsmeade visit I had been hoping for," she said when it seemed like he wasn't going to say anything more. "I mean the last half wasn't, but the first part of it was pretty good."
So she had enjoyed herself after all – at least in the beginning, anyways. He wanted to make it up to her. He knew what he wanted to say. He had rehearsed it for hours while sitting alone on the concrete stone stairs, but he couldn't seem to get passed saying her name. Losing his nerve, he clamped his mouth shut. He couldn't make an idiot of himself if he was silent.
Ginny watched while he struggled to speak. She knew she shouldn't find it so amusing that he was tongue-tied around her but she did – until he stopped trying to talk altogether and moved closer to her. It was all she could do to keep her feet rooted in place when her brain wrapped itself around the idea that Harry Potter was about to kiss her. Unconsciously, she licked her lips as he brought his face closer and closer to her. He was so close she could feel his breath playing on her face –
The sound of conversation and laughter from half a dozen fourth years climbing the front steps interrupted the moment. Harry pulled back at the last possible second, and pretended to fix his glasses on his face. The younger students, not noticing what they had intruded upon, continued on their way up the stairs.
Harry's face had turned a light shade of pink. Without meeting her eye, he cleared his throat, and said, "dinner's probably started."
Feeling more than a little awkward in their current situation, Ginny decided going into the Great Hall could not have been a better suggestion. It would be full of other people and she wouldn't have to worry about looking Harry in the eye.
Keep the reviews coming!!! I appreciate all comments and criticism. Keep your fingers crossed for chapter 11 over the next few days.