A massive wave of frustration was settling over Taranis as she poured over the books again. It was hopeless, they were never going to find the answers they sought. Dumbledore was counting on them, her grandmother was counting on them. Severus was unbearably close, her body and soul ached to reach out to him, and yet she could not. "Damn it all!" She yelled, throwing the book to the floor. "I hate this bloody stupid book! This whole thing is useless, we're never going to do this, who are we kidding. I hate this stupid pot and that dam grail. Ye gods, I hate this fucking table. I hate Dumbledore and bloody England!"
Sticks and stones may break by bones but words will never hurt me.
"Shut up pot!" Severus stood still with shock at her sudden ranting, how does one deal with a woman in this particular situation, he mused as she continued.
"I hate teaching these stupid students, stupid fucking Dark Arts too. I hate this damn robe. I hate my grandmother. I hate my mom and my dad," the woman spewed as she started to sob, "I hate my whole fucking life and I wish I'd never been born!"
Severus watched her sink to the floor, tears running down her cheeks as he was overcome with compassion for her pain. Comforting another person in anguish, was not something he had any experience with, yet he knelt down and took her face in his palms. "Do you hate me as well Taranis?"
Raising her tear streaked face to his, she said softly, "you, I hate most of all."
Sadness overcame him as he kissed her softly on the lips, holding the fragile creature in his arms they drank each other in with their eyes. It seemed like an eternity before he drew her to her feet, and taking her hand, went to his rooms.
Gently he undressed her, kissing the moistness that still ran down her cheeks. Removing his own clothes he lay her down on the bed. Hands in his hair, arms wrapped around him seeking solace, how he cherished her. With a tenderness he made love to her, bodies melting together in passion, humbled by the response to his caress. An unidentified feeling overcame his mind and heart. If I was capable of love, he thought, would it feel like this?
Lying silently, resigned to watch each other, her tears dried and they slept.
Taranis stood in the library looking for a book in the Forbidden Section. Work had continued, but much of the laughter they had shared was overcome by a dull resignation. Hearing her name from the student section, she moved to where she could listen better. Somewhat unsurprised to hear Draco Malfoy's voice.
"I think she'd like a younger man."
"Young as you?"
"I think maybe a young, virile man and inexhaustible sex drive is just what she needs Crab. I've seen the way she looks at me, like she's undressing me with her eyes. Perhaps I just need to make my move, corner her and give her a little push, she'll be begging me to lift her skirts, pump her good. Bet she'd never want me to stop. Imagine her squirming with pleasure as I slam into her, her lily white thighs wrapped around me, oh she'd like it all right."
"Mr. Malfoy," her voice boomed as she stepped out from between the shelves, seething with fury. The gall this child has to make such assumptions. Never would she touch a child. This needed to be fixed, right now. "Crab, Goyle, go, now!" The two ran like scared rats as she loomed over the table, resting her hands on it to glower over the pale boy.
How I'd love to slap that smug look off his face, "twenty points from Slytherin and you will spend this evening in detention! I'm sure the toilets need a good scrubbing." Noticing his leering eyes were directed at the hint of cleavage given her leaning position, she slammed her hand against the table to make her point, "Mr. Malfoy, never ever again will you make any assumptions as to what I want, and be assured that I have no aching desire for you. You are a child, and I am your elder and your professor, do you understand?" At his sneering nod she continued, "I can make your life hell little boy and if I ever hear you speak like this again, you will be the one begging for mercy. I am not an instructor of the Dark Arts for no reason and you would do well to remember that."
Out of the corner of her eye she saw the Potions Master enter the library and make a bee line for their table, "take care of where and when you have your conversations Draco. I trust you understand my leniency in dealing with you I do so out of respect for your father's position. If you dare try and get Snape to make me ease up your punishment, I will tell him I gave you two weeks detention and let him talk me down to one, do I make myself clear?"
The boy nodded as Snape came up to the table, "professor, Mr. Malfoy, I understand we have a problem here?"
"We don't have a problem at all do we Draco," she asked innocently.
"No, professors, none at all."
"I had heard that there was something of a misunderstanding, I am after all head of Slytherin house and should be made aware of what its students are involved in Professor Aislin," came the glower from the man standing over her. "Several of the other students came to me with concerns that you were being too harsh on the boy."
Covering the child with a wondering look, "Mr. Malfoy, do you think my punishment too harsh for the crime?"
"Er, no Professor Snape really it's ok."
A look of exasperation on his face, "I would like to know what happened!"
"Fine! I think this discussion would be better held in private, my office. Malfoy if you've no wish to join us, I suggest you go. Now."
Entering her office Taranis poured two small glasses of Firewhisky, setting one down as the other professor declined the offer.
"Well Taranis? What happened?" came the demand.
Meeting his glare from across the room, "Malfoy was just explaining to his friends how delighted I'd be if he were to spread my lily white thighs and give me the fuck of a lifetime." Feeling smug as the look of shock on Snape's face turned into a mask of fury as he made his way over to her and downed the previously offered glass of whiskey.
"I'll ring that little bastard's neck myself!" Slamming the glass down she stopped him as he made to leave.
"Severus no. I've handled the situation, there is no need for you to interfere. This does not concern you!"
"Must I remind you I am the head of Slytherin house and he is 'my' charge. I will do as I see fit."
"You will not undermine my authority, how dare you even suggest such a thing."
"I will do as I see best and you will remember that in the future."
"And your way is always best is it? Of course you're the best at all you do, and all you do is make people hate you."
"So we're back to you hating me again are we? Never have I suggested I am a nice tolerant person professor."
"Oh you are a bastard indeed, arrogant, insufferable, pushy, know it all, yes I am aware those are your good points. Don't look at me like that Severus Snape, you will not overstep your bounds! It's over so sit and sulk if you like but end it now."
"Fine then Professor Aislin, if that's what you want, it's over!"
Watching his retreating form she wondered at his choice of words, rolling them around in her head, 'it's over', hoping that was not a double-edged sword, aimed at her heart.
When he wouldn't return her looks at dinner she began to worry. Fidgeting hands pushed the food around on her plate as she looked around the room. Xiomara looks good in blue, she noted before her eyes moved onto the headmaster.
Suddenly she choked on her food, eyes wide as she stared at Dumbledore, ignoring Minerva's patting hand on her back. Dear gods! Oh dear gods and thank the heavens she thought as her hands began to tremble.
"Are you ok dear," the older woman asked, "you look awfully pale, do you think you need to go see Poppy?"
Stunned realization washed over her as she pushed back from the table, going over to kneel beside Snape where she put her forehead on the table.
"Professor Aislin, do you need assistance?" He merely glanced at her looking unconcerned.
"Merlin's beard."
"What? What about it?"
"Dear gods Severus, Dumbledore's beard, oh," rising on wobbly legs she ran from the room.
Somewhat appalled at her display in front of the students, still seething from their earlier discussion, he looked over to the Headmaster. So what, he looks the same as he always does. He examined the old man closer for any sign of what had caused such a reaction in Taranis. It hit him like a slap in the face, the beard, ye gods Dumbledore's beard. It was specked with small pieces of the cake he'd been eating. Pumpkin cake, he thought as he now began to tremble at the realization. Of course, Merlin's beard must have had pumpkin cake in it when it fell into the cauldron. Standing so quickly he almost toppled his chair, "you must excuse me, I just realized I left a particularly volatile potion on the fire."
It only took them a few days to solve the puzzle with their new information. A hug of relief somehow turned into an award of a kiss, rough and passionate. Stepping back to take in a deep breath Taranis quickly looked away, "you go tell Dumbledore, I've got to get word to grams," came her voice as she rushed out the door.
A few minutes later a breathless Taranis stepped into the headmaster's office.
"I knew you two could do it, what a fine team you have turned out to be," said the man ignoring the blush staining the young lady's cheeks. "It's all settled, first thing Saturday the two of you, along with Sirus, Moody and Lupin, will go to the Aisle of Avalon. Hagrid will meet you there as I'm sure will Maeve so you can get through her wards to Merlin's cave. Rest and prepare you two, there is much to be done."
Heading back to the lab in what should have been a time of excited joy, Taranis felt sad. She missed the old Severus, the close friendship they shared was wavering, and now there would be no need to see him every night. Fear and trepidation overcame her, the realization she didn't want to leave things like this, "Severus?" she said meekly.
"Yes?"
"I, want to apologize for the other day. You are the head of Slytherin and I should have let you deal with things as you saw fit. You were just so angry, and, Severus I don't want this to end. I don't want us to end. Please?"
The dark man scowled down at her hope filled eyes as he hardened his heart to her plea, "there is no 'us' Taranis, there never was and there never will be. I've never led you to believe otherwise. It's time you accepted that and left me alone."
The lone figure stood in the hall, tears streaming down her beautiful face, her heart breaking in anguish as she watched the man she loved walk out of her life.