Heartache
Songfic to El Tango de Roxanne
From: Moulin Rouge
Full song not included, only part. I suggest you download it and listen to it, as it is good; if you need it, e-mail me and ask. I have it.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or affiliates, nor do I own Moulin Rouge and affiliates. Don't bug me.
Why does my heart cry?
Feelings I can't fight
You're free to leave me
But just don't deceive me
And please
Believe me when I say
I love you
In the dark of the dorm room, quiet at this, the witching hour, a soft "Lumos." was heard as one person, quietly slipped out of the bed in order to not wake their companion. They opened their rucksack and pulled out a sheaf of parchment. It was time…they had put off this day, but no longer.
There was a sound in the dorm now, the soft scratching of a quill as they confided their hopes and fears to the one thing that could potentially heal them.
'You know, it's odd how we got together, her and I. Nobody would have suspected it, I mean, I'm not exactly a good catch. But for some reason, during Christmas holidays last year, well—I realized that, for whatever reason, I was in love with you. I enjoyed spending them with you—and the others, of course—but I didn't stay around all of you that much, trying to figure this all out.
'I wound up denying it all to myself, and continuing going out, and well-nigh ignoring you. But, when I saw you with him...
'I couldn't take it. I wanted you.'
His eyes upon your face
His hand upon your hand
His lips caress your skin
It's more than I can stand
'Well, I pulled you aside at the beginning of this year, at the end of summer vacation. You were mad at him, so I told you of my feelings. You were happy—or so you said—and said that we could be together—just not to tell anyone. I agreed, because I couldn't stand not being with you any longer, but it bothered me. But at least we were together, right?
'I didn't realize, then, what I know now. You didn't intend to give him up. Not to imply that you are a slut, or a whore—I think you believe that you do love both of us, like you tell me—but it hurts me. It hurts me badly. I'm the only one that even knows about us. You say that you love me, but if that is true, why don't you let other know about us? If that is true, then why don't you pick up on my depression, my jealousy, my sadness and anger?
'I believe you love him more than you love me. If that's so, tell me, damn it all, so I can begin the process of healing. So I can move on. But I can't end it with you…Not on my own. Not while there's the slightest chance that you do love me.
'But if you want him, then leave me. I will understand.'
Why does my heart cry?
Feelings I can't fight
You're free to leave me
But just don't deceive me
And please
Believe me when I say
I love you
'I want you—I have never loved anyone as I love you—but I can't take it any longer. You have to tell me. You can't keep stringing us both along. It's not fair to me, at all—I didn't know how this was going to start, or I would have tried—and failed, most likely, but at least the attempt would have been made—to not fall for you as hard as I did. It's not fair to him either. He doesn't even know that you are not faithful to him. I can feel pity for him, but just a small amount. After all, he is my rival. But he doesn't even know it. He doesn't understand why I am so hateful to him now, why I insult him and torture him as badly or worse than any Slytherin.
'But you didn't tell me how this would happen. How you would spend one night, weeks, months with me at a time, but then all of a sudden, you go to him for one night or two, and come back to me and tell me that you like what he does better. You didn't tell me how you would torture my heart and soul. How can you do this to us? You are a nice girl at heart, a good girl—how can you treat us like this? Perhaps you are torn, not knowing which of us you prefer—but I can answer that. It's him. After all, you aren't fearful to claim him as your lover, your boyfriend, regardless of how little time you spend with him now.
'I have to know. You have to tell me now. Tomorrow. There's not going to be any more of this anguish for me. I need a clean break, or at least the security of knowing you love me. But you have to end it with one of us, within the week.'
You're free to leave me
But just don't deceive me
And please
Believe me when I say
I love you
'I'm leaving this here. I'll be on top of the Astronomy tower in the morning. I know you get up early in order to get to your dorm before anyone finds you here. I guess it's a good thing you're so good at Charms, and especially the Silencing charm, huh? Otherwise, we would have been discovered long ago.
'Goodbye, love. Come and tell me what you have decided. I hope…Well, it's obvious what I hope. No matter what, I will love you. I will see you soon.'
A single tear dropped onto the parchment as the signature was added. They sighed and placed the paper into Hermione's hand, using a simple charm to stick it to her hand so it wouldn't be lost. It took an easy charm to remove. They took a deep, shuddering breath, and wrapped a cloak around them. In the early hours of the morning, the Astronomy Tower was cold.
As they left the bed, and the Silencing charm, they heard something…a name.
"Ron," Hermione muttered softly, and rolled onto her side. Another tear fell down their face, and they hurried out the door, not hearing what followed. "Go 'way, Ron. Wanna be with…" and Hermione sighed and fell deeper asleep, a slight smile gracing her face.
Extremely early the next morning, a horrible, heart-wrenching scream of anguish woke the entire castle, from Ravenclaw and Gryffindor Towers to Slytherin dungeon. Dumbledore, still the fastest person in the castle in response to danger to his students, appeared at the Astronomy Tower so quickly it was as if he had Apparated.
"Ms. Granger, what's wrong?" he asked her kindly. Hermione, sobbing as though her heart was broken—which it was—pointed off the Astronomy Tower. Dumbledore leaned over and looked, and his face—which already was somewhat grim—became even grimmer. "I believe you need to go see Madame Pomphrey, Ms. Granger. I'll take care of…her."
Hermione shook her head, but Ron and Harry—both of whom had gotten there shortly behind Dumbledore— each took an arm and carried her to the Hospital Wing. They had not gone to the edge to see what was the matter.
On a ledge approximately two stories down, lay the crumpled body of Ginny Weasley, who had jumped from the tower. There were floating letters hovering near the body that said, 'Goodbye, Hermione. You chose Ron. I chose to end my pain. I love you.' Dumbledore charmed them away and the body into the Hospital Wing, in a fortunately seldom used room: the Morgue. It preserved bodies until the families could pick them up.