A/N: Okay, so I'm getting closer and closer to the end – at long last. Weight of the World is going to be 36 chapters in total. That means that after this one, there's only four more chapters to go! Anyways, I just wanted to say a quick thank you to all my reviewers. I really appreciate all the feedback you've given me throughout the story, especially as I'm getting nearer to the end of it. Happy reading!
CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO: The Protection Spell
Harry was nervous – or maybe scared might have been a better word to describe what he was feeling at that precise moment. He wasn't afraid for himself, but for the people that might be in peril because of the spell they would be performing in thirty minutes time. He stood in the dimly lit Great Hall, completely devoid of any students at such a late hour. Up until that morning he had still been contemplating the notion of not going through with the protection spell. Lupin had tried assuring him that the risks to those involved were minimal, even though there was no way to be certain with the spell being completely untested and all. Harry had finally agreed to it because of the fact that once the spell was completed, it would not affect the others in any way. If he died in battle, no harm would come to any of them. He still had his reservations about the whole thing, but they had no other course of action to follow, and the sudden lack of reports in the Daily Prophet about dark activities made Harry all the more certain that Voldemort was just biding his time until he attacked.
Just as he was pondering about what kind of assault Voldemort would likely be planning, Sirius joined him in the Great Hall. When it became clear that Harry was not going to be the one to initiate conversation, Sirius spoke.
"Remus gave me your message," he started, unsure of what to say, as this was the first conversation between them since Harry's angry departure from his home. "Thank you for bringing me in on this."
Harry deliberately turned and faced the direction away from his godfather. "It doesn't change anything. I meant what I said. The only reason you're here is because Professor Lupin said we needed someone who knew me in order to make the spell stronger."
"Harry, I know how angry you are with me – and I'll give you as much space as you need – but I will never cut myself out of your life."
"You don't get it, do you?" Harry rounded on him. "There isn't a single thing you can do to fix what you've done, so stop trying."
The sound of footsteps behind them ended whatever reply Sirius had planned before he even had a chance to begin. Harry sent a final glare his way before turning his attention on the newcomers. It was Ginny, flanked on either side by Ron and Hermione.
"Are we just waiting for Professor Lupin?" Hermione asked, trying to diffuse some of the tension in the room.
"He'll be here soon," Sirius said to her. "He had a few last minute preparations to make."
"Like what?" Harry asked him before he could stop himself.
"Just some additional precautions. Nothing any of you need to worry about," Sirius said to them.
Harry begged to differ, but he wasn't up for another round of yelling with his godfather. He trusted Lupin enough to know that he wouldn't hide anything vital from them.
Across from Harry, Hermione took a seat at one of the House benches. She was still recovering from being poisoned and was quite a long way off from looking like her old self. Dark circles hung under her eyes and her skin colour remained rather pale.
"We can wait a few more nights if you're not feeling up to this," Harry said to her.
"Harry, you know we have to do this tonight," she said adamantly. "Something's going to happen soon, and the longer we wait, the greater the chance is of us being caught unprepared."
"He's right," Ron said from the other side of Harry. "We should wait until you've regained your strength."
It was almost strange to hear Ron speaking to her. They couldn't have spoken more than a few words to each other since her release from the hospital wing. Harry wished there was something he could do. At least when they were fighting he had always known what to say, but now he didn't have a clue.
"I can do this," she said unwaveringly.
Both he and Ron knew that determination sound in her voice all too well. No amount of arguing they could do would be able to discourage her.
"Sorry to keep you all waiting," came Lupin's voice as he entered the Great Hall. "Is everyone ready?"
There were murmurs of 'yes', and Lupin began handing out a piece of parchment with some scribbled words on it to everyone. "At precisely midnight recite this incantation out loud three times with your wands pointed straight up in the air. The energy created should produce a visible barrier that will travel through the four wands and then end up on mine, where I will recite a similar incantation to transfer the energy to Harry through his scar."
They all performed time charms on their watches so that they would all show the exact same time, and then all that was left was for everyone to go to their assigned spots and wait.
"Is there any questions?"
No one spoke. Maybe it was because no one knew what to say. They all stood looking as somber as ever.
"If anything happens send a warning out through your wands and we'll come to you," Lupin instructed Ron, Hermione and Ginny.
Hermione touched Harry's arm briefly and Ron gave his shoulder a quick squeeze before walking out. He saw conflicting emotions run across Ginny's face but she didn't say anything to him before following behind her brother and Hermione.
"I'll see you both in a bit," Sirius said, trying to keep his tone light. "Good luck."
He and Lupin exchanged handshakes and pats on the back, and Harry thought Sirius was going to do the same with him, and he did, except he gripped Harry's shoulder tightly and stared at him so intently, it threw Harry for a moment. His look had lost all the things he had come to associate with his godfather. He was looking at Harry the way a father would stare at their son. Harry wanted to say something, but Sirius was already walking away and he couldn't think about it any longer. He and Lupin needed to get set up. There was only ten minutes to midnight.
Waiting was the hardest part for Harry. Even with the correct time fast approaching, he began to feel more uncertain about the whole thing. Lupin looked just as uneasy. That was because he had the most important part in the spell. Once all the energies from the magical hot spots surrounding the school were transferred to his wand, he then had to transfer them to Harry. There was no doubt in Harry's mind that it would be painful. Anything that had to do with his scar always had, but he would endure whatever he had to for the spell to work.
Lupin caught him absently running his fingers over his lightning bolt scar, and said, "I don't know how painful it will be."
Harry acknowledged that he had heard him, but remained silent. Lupin knew as well as he did that even if he was in agony, it would be far better then ending the spell prematurely. Too many things could go wrong if they stopped it before the transfer was complete.
"One more minute," Lupin told him, glancing down at his watch.
The house tables had been pushed back against the walls, leaving Harry and Lupin with a wide-open space in the middle of the room.
If Sirius had it his way, it would have been him in the room, not Lupin. But Harry had been so reluctant even to let him in on the spell, that his professor had convinced Sirius it would be better for everyone involved if he performed the transfer part instead. Sirius hadn't liked it, but Lupin had finally managed to convince him.
"Ten seconds," Lupin warned.
Harry forced himself to clear his mind of all thoughts as Lupin had instructed him during an earlier practice session. He took slow, steadying breaths and closed his eyes.
"Time," announced Lupin.
Harry kept his breathing steady, focusing only on the Latin incantation his Professor was reading. Lupin had run through it with him several times beforehand that he understood every word that was being spoken. The words were recited three times as they were supposed to be, and for a moment there was total silence, before Harry felt a hot, bright light being directed at him. He chanced opening his eyes and stared out in wonder at the crackling energy suspended above Lupin's head with his wand. Lupin gave him a small, regretful look before bringing his wand down and touching it to Harry's scar. At first, Harry felt nothing except a slight tingling sensation. Then Lupin said, "protect," and he felt the searing hot pain tear through his scar. It was agony, and he tried to fight off gasping out in pain but couldn't. If he had been capable of thought he would have been thinking how something that was supposed to protect him could be so bloody painful. It was ripping through his skull and body, making it appear as if he were going through convulsions – then it all stopped. No longer being held up by the waves of energy, he crumpled to the floor, his breathing coming in ragged breaths. He tried to sit up and was only able to do so with Lupin's assistance.
"Harry, I'm sorry. I should have known this would happen."
"What do you mean?" Harry said when he was capable of speaking.
"Your scar is surrounded by dark energy. I should have anticipated that it would try and fight the protection spell to preserve itself," he explained.
"Well, it sure put up a good fight," said Harry, pushing himself to his feet, feeling the strength slowly returning to his body.
"What happened?" Hermione cried, running in and seeing Lupin grip Harry's arm with a steadying hand as he swayed slightly on his feet.
"Just a bit of stubbornness on the part of my scar, but I'm fine now," he assured her.
She didn't believe him but there was no point in pestering him further as the others came rushing in and would very likely start doing the same.
He tried assuring them all that he was fine, and Sirius seemed to be the most skeptical of them all.
"I think you should head back to Gryffindor Tower," Lupin said to him. "Get a good night's sleep and you'll feel better in the morning."
Harry whole-heartedly agreed, and with Ron and Hermione standing guard on either side of him, they began to walk back to the common room.
When they were inside Gryffindor Tower, he told his friends he would head up to bed in a bit. It took quite a bit of convincing, but he was eventually successful in shaking off their concern and they left him alone in the common room. Even being as exhausted as he was, sleep seemed to be the farthest thing on his mind.
When he heard the portrait hole swing open, he remained standing where he was, with his back to it.
"Do you think it worked?" She asked, coming up behind him.
Of course she would be brave enough to ask the one question everyone else had been too afraid to ask. "I don't know," he answered honestly, turning around so he was facing Ginny.
"I don't want you to get the wrong idea about what happened tonight."
"And what would that be?" He said, even though he knew what she was referring to.
"Things are not okay between us, Harry."
"I know that, but what you said – you had to have felt – " He shook his head and started over. "Lupin said for the spell to be bound to me, the people involved had to have some sort of emotional attachment to me." The word he wanted to say was love, but something was stopping him from being able to say it.
"I did what I had to for the sake of the spell," she said, keeping her expression carefully guarded. "It still doesn't change anything."
He did not understand how she could stand there and say nothing had changed. He still expected her to be angry with him, but not this. "Can we go somewhere and talk?"
"I can't," was her immediate response. "I have to pack."
"Pack?" Harry echoed. "For what? Where are you going?"
The look on her face told him she never had any intention of telling him, but had already said this much, so kept going. "There's a medical training seminar starting tomorrow for five days. Students from wizarding schools all over Europe will be there."
"But you have school," he protested, not sure why he was trying to keep her from leaving.
"I've worked ahead so I won't miss much. It's all reviewing now anyways. Madame Pomfrey approved it and my parents signed the permission form."
"Why didn't you say anything before now?"
"Because we weren't talking," she reminded him.
"And whose fault was that?" He snapped.
Her face took on a look that was very similar to Ron's when he was close to losing his temper. "Harry, I don't want to fight with you because that's all we seem to do anymore, and I'm sick of it. But I'm not the only one who's at fault here."
She hurried up the staircase to the girl's dormitory, extracting all thoughts of Harry from her mind and focusing solely on what she would need to bring with her tomorrow. A five-day break from Harry would be exactly what she needed. She would come back with a clearer head and they would only have to see each other for one more week before summer vacation began.
In all her previous years at Hogwarts, and even during her current one, Hermione had always just walked into the boys' dorm if the door was open. But things change and she decided to knock, even though Ron was standing right there, bent over his trunk, rummaging around inside.
He looked up in annoyance, but his expression softened when he saw it was her. "I can't remember the last time you knocked."
"It was third year," she said, remembering it as clearly as if it had happened last week. "Both you and Harry weren't speaking to me because I told Professor McGonagall about the Firebolt."
"I remember," he said, straightening.
She felt ridiculous for feeling this awkward around him. It was Ron, the person she had shared everything with for as long as she could remember. That single reason was probably what was contributing to making her so uncomfortable around him. Everything had changed so drastically between them they didn't know how to act around each other anymore. It closely resembled what had happened when they had first gotten together at the end of their fifth year. The difference now was this awkwardness wasn't likely to disappear with a few shared kisses in public and Ron walking her to class.
They had barely spoken since the protection spell – not that they had been speaking all that much before then. It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to him, but she didn't know what to say that wouldn't come out sounding stupid or forced. She was sure it was the same for him. Oddly enough, she found herself wishing they would get into a row. She much preferred yelling and arguing to this silent treatment they were giving each other. She finally understood what Harry must have been going through with Ginny – knowing exactly what you wanted to say, but being unable to say it.
Before she lost her nerve and left, she crossed the room and handed him the two sweaters tucked under her arms. "You forgot these in my room. I just wanted to give them back to you."
"Um, thanks," he said, struggling to find the right words to say.
She turned to go, but his hand touched her arm. For that brief second that his skin was touching hers it felt like nothing had changed. "My feelings for you won't change."
She really wished he had just let her go, because she wasn't ready to have this conversation with him.
"I won't lie and say I'm okay with things the way they are," he went on. "I don't even know if I'm capable of just being you best friend. I – I just thought you should know that," he said, looking away.
She didn't have a response to that, but he did not look to be expecting one.
Their conversation followed her to bed that night. She lied awake for hours, and time and time again kept coming up with the same realization. Was it even possible for two people who had shared so much to go back to simply being friends?