Title Stupid
By Tyrne J
Series Naruto
Disclaimer Written by a fan, for fans only. No profit made, only thing I get from this is the sheer enjoyment of manipulating characters into saying stupid things. This means I don't claim ownership of the series, silly.
[notes]

/Sakura was dancing through the trees when Kakashi called her back down again, and the two left Sasuke and Naruto to the task of climbing those trees, hopeless as it seemed for them.

"Arghhhh," Naruto growled as he ran up his tree for the umpteenth time, marking the tree once more with his kunai. He glanced to the side at the blue streak making its way up another tree, then growled again. "Rrrrrr – I WON'T LOSE!" He yelled this as he fell back to the ground, his concentration not enough to focus the chakra into his feet.

Sasuke spared only a glare for the blonde on his way up his own tree, then he made a mark, and down he went.

So it went: Run up the tree, make a slash, fall all the way down, spend a few minutes concentrating, then run up the tree again./

" – And they went on like this for days, y'know!" Sakura laughed to Ino over dinner. "But they both got it, in the end."

"That's an understatement, and you know it." Ino sighed as she sipped at her tea. "Each of them probably has more power than both of us combined."

At that, Sakura's face crinkled up angrily. "Yeah, doesn't that just suck? I can't believe Naruto, of all people, would end up with control like that. It makes me mad just thinking about it."

Ino only rolled her eyes.

"And that was even back then." Sakura went on, calming down a little. Absentmindedly, she ran fingers through her boyish pink hair and readjusted her forehead protector. Out of habit, Ino did the same, retying her protector under her ponytail.

"Hn. It's been a few years, hasn't it."

"Seems like a long time ago."

"…"

"…"

"Heh, Getting old already, Sakura-baasan?"

"W-What?!" Sakura turned to send an indignant glare at the blonde. "N-No way am I getting that old, you pig!"

"You sure sound like an old hag for a fifteen-year-old, Sakura-baasan!"

There was a piercing screech and the crash of ceramic from Sakura's apartment home. "TAKE THAT BACK, YOU DIRTY PIG!"

Annnd, they were at it again.

Run up the tree, make a mark, fall down, then run up again.

Sort of.

"AW, DAMMIT DAMMIT DAMMIT!" Naruto was nearly screaming in frustration as he fell back to the ground, kunai dragging into the tree all the way down. "I got this before – I've HAD this before – I've BEEN ABLE TO DO THIS FOR YEARS, WHY CAN'T I DO IT NOW?!"

There was a thump beside him, and Sasuke sat up slowly from his position on the ground, cool eyes glaring daggers at the blonde. "This is all your fault, you know."

"How the HELL do you FIGURE, SASUKE?!" Naruto tried to leap to his feet, brandishing his kunai to attack the dark-haired ninja, but ended up tumbling face-first into the ground beside Sasuke. "AAARRRGH! I CAN'T STAND IT!"

" – your fault that we now have to spend a year in rehab, and face a possible rank deduction. Your fault." Sasuke's voice had taken to quivering in his own frustration, and was dangerously calm, despite the fact that his hands were busy attempting to crush a thin, fallen branch – and failing miserably. "… I have to spend a year in rehab… with you."

"WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS BLAMING IT ON ME?! TELL ME!" Still in a blind rage, Naruto fumbled about, struggling to get up and hitting Sasuke in the process. The blonde had been especially incoherent after the accident, but Naruto was still Naruto, in spite of it all.

"!... Just forget it!" The truth was, it was a true accident, but there was no way Sasuke would allow Naruto to get away scot-free. He had to say something. Gritting his teeth, he picked himself up from the ground and prepared himself for the run up his tree.

Well, a true accident in that way where true accidents involved powerful mind-affecting jitsus and crazed lunatics who didn't know how to use them. The accident part was when Naruto and Sasuke had gotten in the crossfire between the lunatics and some other Konoha ninjas. On their day off.

Granted, they got in the way because they were having a fight of their own, and granted, they would never have been in the way if Naruto hadn't insisted on eating at the ramen shop first then having the fight outside the village, but then again –

"It really was his fault." Sasuke muttered grumpily to himself, remembering the one month of utter hell his mind and body had gone through since getting in the way of those jitsus. The only thing that was keeping him from trying to kill Naruto then and there was the knowledge that he had gone through the exact same pain, and that they were still even in skill and rank. That, and the fact that after trying to run up the tree only ten times, his body was feeling positively like jelly on sticks.

But Naruto was already halfway up the stupid tree. Sasuke was not about to let that guy beat him in any way, shape, or form, so he squandered up enough concentration and energy for another run.

All the way up the tree, all the way up the tree, ALL THE WAY UP THE STUPID TREE! But the jelly-on-sticks feeling was starting to overcome the adrenaline –

"Oi." Naruto waved feebly from where he hung from his kunai, it's sharp end embedded deeply into the tree trunk. His lips twitched into something of a grin.

"Yo." The other teenager said in reply, himself hanging from a kunai embedded in the tree.

The two stared at each other from their respective trees, Several meters between them, and more than several meters between them and the ground. A quiet breeze ruffled leaves in the forest, and far off there could be heard the sound of squirrels chittering to themselves.

A thought flitted through Sasuke's mind: Wow, we're pathetic.

Naruto, suddenly energetic again, began to kick the trunk. "Stupid STUPID STUPID DAMMIT STUPID ARGHHH!"

And because he managed to pull the kunai away from the tree in the process, he fell to the ground, executing an almost graceful landing and toppling onto the forest floor.

Sasuke followed soon after, giving into that jelly-on-sticks feeling, and the two of them remained there, on the forest floor, staring up at the towering trees.

"Stupid." Naruto pouted and muttered.

Sasuke worked his mouth a few moments before answering. "Very eloquent."

"Shut up."

"…"

"…"

"So…"

"Yeah?"

"Sex?"

"Stupid, you can't even move."

"Neither can you, idiot."

"Whatever. I can still… No I can't."

"HA." There was a pause. "This is still all your fault, y'know."

"Yeah, and I love you, too."

"… Stupid."

End

["baasan" - Ino is calling Sakura a granny.
I'd chalk up Naruto's sudden loss of vocab to the accident, but oh, well.]