******
It had been another one of those days at work. You know what I mean, the kind that makes you just want to bang your head on the wall and drool. To top it all off, it was dark and foggy when I finally left the office.
On the way home, a stupid deer decided it wanted to be a hood ornament. I swerved to avoid it and ended up careening off the side of the road and into a ditch. Luckily, I was wearing a seatbelt but my head hit the steering wheel and I blacked out for a few minutes. (No airbag).
Shaking, shaking. Someone was shaking my shoulder. My forehead ached where it struck the steering wheel. I moaned and sat back in the seat trying to open my eyes.
"What happened?" A male voice asked me.
"Deer," I mumbled and put my hands on my head trying to contain the ache.
"Deer?" He asked.
"Yeah, ran right out in front of me," I said, taking a mental inventory of my physical condition. Nothing seemed to be permanently damaged and I was thankful for that.
"You call the cops?" I asked, looking at him for the first time. Damn, he was gorgeous! (Oh, no, the sun was coming up! How long had I been here?)
"Cops?" he repeated, looking at me like I was some sort of alien.
"Yeah, the cops, the police, you know, the sheriff?" I snapped irritably. (Must find drugs).
"No cops," he said.
That was good, anyway.
"Can you help me get my truck back on the road?" I asked and opened the door to step out and survey the damage to my truck.
Standing next to him was a really hairy midget and it startled me to see him there. He had been invisible over the truck door and I almost stepped on him as I got out.
"Sorry, dude," I said to the hairy guy who eyed me suspiciously and gave me a wide berth. I was a bit unsteady on my feet yet.
I looked over my poor old beater. It certainly had been in worse situations. Aside from a few new scratches and dents it seemed to be in good working order. I checked under the hood to make sure.
The guy and the midget watched me in fascination and jumped back when I slammed the hood of the truck shut.
"Looks like everything is ok," I said. "Can you guys help me push it back to the road?"
"Road?" Gorgeous repeated. Figures. He couldn't be gorgeous AND have a brain! That'd be too much to ask for. What a waste! (I could have gotten over the weird ear thing but I just don't do dumb.)
I looked at the hairy guy. "I take it you're the brains in this operation?" I asked him.
He said nothing so I did what any self-reliant independent girl would do. I put the truck in neutral and tried to push it myself.
The hairy guy finally got the idea and helped me push the truck while Blondie wandered off into the nearby woods.
Hairy was surprisingly strong and after a few minutes of pushing, we got the truck out of the ditch and back on flat ground.
"Thanks," I said a bit breathlessly and leaned against the hood.
I looked around and didn't recognize anything. There wasn't even a road. What the hell happened? I wondered and looked down at the hairy guy. He was just standing there looking at me with a mixture of curiosity and wonder.
******
Notes: Um – It's come to my attention that I'm being a bit obscure. So, to clear things up a bit, I'm putting a key at the end of each chapter telling who's who and explaining some "colorful" sayings.
Again, I apologize for my obscurity! Thanks to Tenacious D for pointing that out! (I don't know these things unless you tell me in a review!)
Hairy – Gimli
Blondie/Gorgeous – Legolas
Scruffy – Aragorn
Old Guy/Drama Queen – Gandalf
Beater – term of affection used for an old, well-worn vehicle
It had been another one of those days at work. You know what I mean, the kind that makes you just want to bang your head on the wall and drool. To top it all off, it was dark and foggy when I finally left the office.
On the way home, a stupid deer decided it wanted to be a hood ornament. I swerved to avoid it and ended up careening off the side of the road and into a ditch. Luckily, I was wearing a seatbelt but my head hit the steering wheel and I blacked out for a few minutes. (No airbag).
Shaking, shaking. Someone was shaking my shoulder. My forehead ached where it struck the steering wheel. I moaned and sat back in the seat trying to open my eyes.
"What happened?" A male voice asked me.
"Deer," I mumbled and put my hands on my head trying to contain the ache.
"Deer?" He asked.
"Yeah, ran right out in front of me," I said, taking a mental inventory of my physical condition. Nothing seemed to be permanently damaged and I was thankful for that.
"You call the cops?" I asked, looking at him for the first time. Damn, he was gorgeous! (Oh, no, the sun was coming up! How long had I been here?)
"Cops?" he repeated, looking at me like I was some sort of alien.
"Yeah, the cops, the police, you know, the sheriff?" I snapped irritably. (Must find drugs).
"No cops," he said.
That was good, anyway.
"Can you help me get my truck back on the road?" I asked and opened the door to step out and survey the damage to my truck.
Standing next to him was a really hairy midget and it startled me to see him there. He had been invisible over the truck door and I almost stepped on him as I got out.
"Sorry, dude," I said to the hairy guy who eyed me suspiciously and gave me a wide berth. I was a bit unsteady on my feet yet.
I looked over my poor old beater. It certainly had been in worse situations. Aside from a few new scratches and dents it seemed to be in good working order. I checked under the hood to make sure.
The guy and the midget watched me in fascination and jumped back when I slammed the hood of the truck shut.
"Looks like everything is ok," I said. "Can you guys help me push it back to the road?"
"Road?" Gorgeous repeated. Figures. He couldn't be gorgeous AND have a brain! That'd be too much to ask for. What a waste! (I could have gotten over the weird ear thing but I just don't do dumb.)
I looked at the hairy guy. "I take it you're the brains in this operation?" I asked him.
He said nothing so I did what any self-reliant independent girl would do. I put the truck in neutral and tried to push it myself.
The hairy guy finally got the idea and helped me push the truck while Blondie wandered off into the nearby woods.
Hairy was surprisingly strong and after a few minutes of pushing, we got the truck out of the ditch and back on flat ground.
"Thanks," I said a bit breathlessly and leaned against the hood.
I looked around and didn't recognize anything. There wasn't even a road. What the hell happened? I wondered and looked down at the hairy guy. He was just standing there looking at me with a mixture of curiosity and wonder.
******
Notes: Um – It's come to my attention that I'm being a bit obscure. So, to clear things up a bit, I'm putting a key at the end of each chapter telling who's who and explaining some "colorful" sayings.
Again, I apologize for my obscurity! Thanks to Tenacious D for pointing that out! (I don't know these things unless you tell me in a review!)
Hairy – Gimli
Blondie/Gorgeous – Legolas
Scruffy – Aragorn
Old Guy/Drama Queen – Gandalf
Beater – term of affection used for an old, well-worn vehicle