Looks like I've been inspired. Don't start expecting it. Also, I'm
switching to Japanese names. I don't own the comically misshapen carrot.
In Lothlorien:
Galadriel: It's party time! Everybody gets presents!
All: Yay!!!
Galadriel: Let's do thisin order of..., who am I kidding? Random order!!! Gifts will go in this order: Airenidale, Legolas, Aragorn, Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Gimli, Anzu, Jonouchi, Yuugi, Yami, Mai, Honda, Kaiba's (who finally caught up to everybody). Everyone else left, because they couldn't wait this long, and they actually had lives to get back to. Let's take a look and see how they're doing:
*scene fades to some people who we thought got banished to the shadow realm*
On an Island in the Bahamas
Sam: This is the life! Don't you think so Boromir? *sips lemonade*
Boromir: Sure beats having to fight orcs all the time. *getting a tan*
Malik & his girlfriend: *making out like crazy*
*scene back to Lothlorien*
All: *remembering Elrond's words*
Elrond: None of you is bound to go further than you will... *echo, echo, echo...*
All: Nah, we're too cool.
Authoress: Wait a minute, why don't I get presents?
Galadriel: What do you think I am, a Christmas tree?!?!?!?!
Authoress: Grrr...
Galadriel: *reads off list* Airenidale... you get *fanfare* A WHOLE NEW WARDROBE, COMPLETE WITH A KILLER MAKEOVER!!!
Airenidale: OMG!!!! YAY!!!
Authoress: Beauty Queen...
Airenidale: Shut up!
Galadriel: Next... Legolas... I give you... you're gonna love this one... A—Wait a minute... where's my introduction music?!?!?
Random monkey: *British accent* Sorry!
Galadriel: *drumroll* Airenidale! And a comically misshapen carrot.
Airenidale: Huh? What?
Galadriel: I'm giving you to Legolas.
Airenidale: Oh, ok.
Legolas: YAY!!! Uh... I mean ... thanks for the present?
Airenidale: Shut up, you know you love me. *hits him over the top of the head*
Galadriel: Next, Aragorn! You're in the same boat as the authoress...
Aragorn: Wow! What a great present!
Galadriel: *doesn't hear for some reason* There is no greater gift I can give you *touches his pretty jewel* than the one you already bear.
Aragorn: Uh huh. Riiiight.
Galadriel: Next, Merry and Pippin! I can't remember which of you is which, so I'm giving you joint custody of these: * gives them books almost two- thirds their size*
Merry: A "T" Encyclopedia? But what's paper?
Pippin: A "P" Encyclopedia? But, what IS tape?
Airenidale: *switches the books*
Merry/Pippin: Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh. That helps.
Galadriel: Next, Frodo. Light of Eärendil. Next.
Frodo: But, but, I wanted Sam! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaa! *sniff* Galadriel: No one cares. Gimli, what do you want.
Gimli: Blonde hair.
Galadriel: *pulls out some hair* Ow. Here ya go.
Gimli: *happy face* Soooo, happpppyyyyyy!!!!
Galadriel: Next, Anzu. You get: Sam's stuff, plus elvish rope, and a box of dirt.
Anzu: Um... can I have a tall buff version of Yuugi?
Yami: *edges away*
Yuugi: I feel unloved.
Anzu: I love you Yuugi!!!
Galadriel: Next, Jonouchi. You get, um... Mai. And a year supply of calamari, courtesy of Legolas.
Jono: SWEET!
Mai: What?! I should get him! Not the other way around!
Galadriel: * does scary Galadriel trick* WAIT YOUR TURN!!!!!!!
Jono: ............
Yuugi: My turn, My turn!!!
Galadriel: I'm running out of stuff... NEXT!
Yuugi: Awww...
Anzu: You can share my presents!
Yuugi: Yay! You're such I great friend!
Anzu: Yay! I like being a great friend. I like seeing my friens happy! I like ... *blahblahblah*
Galadriel: Yami, you can have the monkey.
Yami: Yes! More subjects to rule with my power as phaoroh!
Galadriel: Mai, it's your turn. As I have no stuff left, and because of your... request, I will give you official legal ownership of Jonouchi.
Mai: It's about time.
Galadriel: Honda, I will give you this motorcycle, complete with helmet, leather jacket and all that jazz.
Airenidale: *starts singing from Chicago*
Authoress: So that's how he got that stuff...
Galadriel: And finally, for you two who share the name 'Kaiba' it is gift enough that I don't remove you heads from you shoulders for trespassing! Make sure it doesn't happen again.
Seto: Hmph.
Mokuba: We won't! I promise! Nii-sama!!! (Big brother)
Galadriel: Such a cute little boy. You are all welcome hear whenever you want. Now go away.
Aragorn: I get Authoress's boat!!!
In Lothlorien:
Galadriel: It's party time! Everybody gets presents!
All: Yay!!!
Galadriel: Let's do thisin order of..., who am I kidding? Random order!!! Gifts will go in this order: Airenidale, Legolas, Aragorn, Merry, Pippin, Frodo, Gimli, Anzu, Jonouchi, Yuugi, Yami, Mai, Honda, Kaiba's (who finally caught up to everybody). Everyone else left, because they couldn't wait this long, and they actually had lives to get back to. Let's take a look and see how they're doing:
*scene fades to some people who we thought got banished to the shadow realm*
On an Island in the Bahamas
Sam: This is the life! Don't you think so Boromir? *sips lemonade*
Boromir: Sure beats having to fight orcs all the time. *getting a tan*
Malik & his girlfriend: *making out like crazy*
*scene back to Lothlorien*
All: *remembering Elrond's words*
Elrond: None of you is bound to go further than you will... *echo, echo, echo...*
All: Nah, we're too cool.
Authoress: Wait a minute, why don't I get presents?
Galadriel: What do you think I am, a Christmas tree?!?!?!?!
Authoress: Grrr...
Galadriel: *reads off list* Airenidale... you get *fanfare* A WHOLE NEW WARDROBE, COMPLETE WITH A KILLER MAKEOVER!!!
Airenidale: OMG!!!! YAY!!!
Authoress: Beauty Queen...
Airenidale: Shut up!
Galadriel: Next... Legolas... I give you... you're gonna love this one... A—Wait a minute... where's my introduction music?!?!?
Random monkey: *British accent* Sorry!
Galadriel: *drumroll* Airenidale! And a comically misshapen carrot.
Airenidale: Huh? What?
Galadriel: I'm giving you to Legolas.
Airenidale: Oh, ok.
Legolas: YAY!!! Uh... I mean ... thanks for the present?
Airenidale: Shut up, you know you love me. *hits him over the top of the head*
Galadriel: Next, Aragorn! You're in the same boat as the authoress...
Aragorn: Wow! What a great present!
Galadriel: *doesn't hear for some reason* There is no greater gift I can give you *touches his pretty jewel* than the one you already bear.
Aragorn: Uh huh. Riiiight.
Galadriel: Next, Merry and Pippin! I can't remember which of you is which, so I'm giving you joint custody of these: * gives them books almost two- thirds their size*
Merry: A "T" Encyclopedia? But what's paper?
Pippin: A "P" Encyclopedia? But, what IS tape?
Airenidale: *switches the books*
Merry/Pippin: Ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh. That helps.
Galadriel: Next, Frodo. Light of Eärendil. Next.
Frodo: But, but, I wanted Sam! Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa aaaaaaaaaaaa! *sniff* Galadriel: No one cares. Gimli, what do you want.
Gimli: Blonde hair.
Galadriel: *pulls out some hair* Ow. Here ya go.
Gimli: *happy face* Soooo, happpppyyyyyy!!!!
Galadriel: Next, Anzu. You get: Sam's stuff, plus elvish rope, and a box of dirt.
Anzu: Um... can I have a tall buff version of Yuugi?
Yami: *edges away*
Yuugi: I feel unloved.
Anzu: I love you Yuugi!!!
Galadriel: Next, Jonouchi. You get, um... Mai. And a year supply of calamari, courtesy of Legolas.
Jono: SWEET!
Mai: What?! I should get him! Not the other way around!
Galadriel: * does scary Galadriel trick* WAIT YOUR TURN!!!!!!!
Jono: ............
Yuugi: My turn, My turn!!!
Galadriel: I'm running out of stuff... NEXT!
Yuugi: Awww...
Anzu: You can share my presents!
Yuugi: Yay! You're such I great friend!
Anzu: Yay! I like being a great friend. I like seeing my friens happy! I like ... *blahblahblah*
Galadriel: Yami, you can have the monkey.
Yami: Yes! More subjects to rule with my power as phaoroh!
Galadriel: Mai, it's your turn. As I have no stuff left, and because of your... request, I will give you official legal ownership of Jonouchi.
Mai: It's about time.
Galadriel: Honda, I will give you this motorcycle, complete with helmet, leather jacket and all that jazz.
Airenidale: *starts singing from Chicago*
Authoress: So that's how he got that stuff...
Galadriel: And finally, for you two who share the name 'Kaiba' it is gift enough that I don't remove you heads from you shoulders for trespassing! Make sure it doesn't happen again.
Seto: Hmph.
Mokuba: We won't! I promise! Nii-sama!!! (Big brother)
Galadriel: Such a cute little boy. You are all welcome hear whenever you want. Now go away.
Aragorn: I get Authoress's boat!!!