Otherworld

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Genre: Drama/Romance

Classification: Epic

Rating: R

Pairings: Zell x Quistis, Zell x Squall

Warnings: AU, Alcohol Use, Drug Use, Language, Lemon

Disclaimer: The Final Fantasy VIII franchise is owned by Squaresoft

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AU. Zell is the lead singer for a rock band, but what happens when he becomes torn between the booze, the drugs, his bassist, and his drummer? [Zell x Quistis, Zell x Squall]

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Author's Notes: A very special thank you to Maia and YukaYuka. Both of you are amazing to me. I look forward to reading your reviews all of the time. Don't worry, I'm trying to leave both of you some long reviews as well. And I hope I never displease either of you with my story. See, I think the secret to writing a good story is to act like you are the reader. You simply have to write what you would like to read. And that's what I do. Regardless, I'm still very hyped that you keep reading and reviewing this. I just love updating this for both of you. Really, it gives me something to do. Because I'm not in the mood to play any video game right now, hehe. And to answer YukaYuka's question, the answer is yes. I did write those songs in Chapter Three on my own. Alright, and I will give Maia another huge hug since she hugged me. Okay, here's Chapter Five. Please enjoy.

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Ch. 05

I Don't Believe I Went Too Far

[Zell's P.O.V.]

"She's your cocaine, she's got you shaving your legs."

I grinned at the sound of a alternative rock song I'd heard years ago. I folded my arms across my chest. My idea of going to a bar tonight had been a kick ass idea, because I think all of us were pretty anxious to do something. I stood between Quistis and Squall, looking at the bar we'd chosen. It was some joint called Ever. Quistis had heard about it from Xu a few weeks ago. It was kind of misty on the inside, it must've been from all of the cigarettes. But who was I to complain? After all, earlier today our living room had been pretty misty from the joint we'd been smoking.

Man.

It'd been such a day. First Quistis and I had gotten pretty stoned and ended up dry humping, and then I shoved my tongue down Squall's throat. Crazy. And I couldn't keep blaming it on the weed. It was too late for that now. I was deep in this, it wasn't just up to my knees. It was all the way at my throat. I couldn't just get a grip. I was stuck in this. And I wasn't even sure if I wanted to get out.

"Zell," Quistis called, bringing me out of my thoughts. "Zell, what do you want to do?"

"Uh," I murmured. "I'm gonna head to the bar. What about you guys?"

"Well," Quistis began. "I said I'd call Xu to let her know we found the bar okay. I think I'm going to go to the bathroom and call her on my cell."

"I'm gonna play some pool," Squall replied, gazing in the direction of the pool tables.

"Aight," I said. "Well, let's try and have a good time. Catch you guys later."

"Later," Squall bid.

And with that, the three of us split paths, heading off in separate directions.

I found that the bar itself wasn't as shiny or glamorous as the one in that techno club the other night, but it wasn't bad. It seemed like a nice place. The bartender looked like he knew what he was doing, anyway.

After I found my way through the ocean of tables until I finally found a stool at the bar. I let out a sigh, and looked up only when the bartender came over to me.

"Hey," he said. "What can I get you?"

"Uh, Bloody Mary."

"Coming right up."

I ran a hand through my blonde spikes, shaking my head. I knew I couldn't drink too much. I'd gotten really fucked up last time. I didn't really wanna risk that again. So why did I even decide to come to a bar in the first place? Obviously I didn't care that much. Oh, fuck it. If I ended up waking up with a headache I could always get Xu to give me seven aspirins again.

"Here."

I smiled slightly at the tall, cool glass of alcoholic blood. The bartender slid it over to me and I instantly picked it up, bringing it to my lips. I let it flow down my throat like a river of red, my throat nearly having an orgasm of approval.

"Man."

I looked up, expecting to see the bartender trying to make conversation with me. He wasn't. In fact, he wasn't even close to me. He was getting someone else's order on the other side of the bar. I furrowed my eyebrows. I looked to my left, and saw some lady sipping at her glass. It wasn't her. I turned to my right and saw three guys laughing and drooling all over their drinks. Kind of sick. It must've been one of them.

"That bitch was fucking fine. Did you see her tits? Shit, man, shit."

"I'd fuck her up any day."

"Same here. Fuck, man. Why don't we?"

"What?"

"Why don't we fuck her?"

"What if she doesn't want us to?"

"Who gives a fuck?"

"Isn't that rape?"

"Yeah, so fucking what."

"You're evil, man."

"Shut up. Are you in this or not?"

"Fuck yeah I'm in this. That bitch is fucking fine."

"So where is that stupid bitch?"

"She headed over to the bathroom."

"Aight, let's keep an eye on her. When she gets out, we'll smooth talk her into gettin' a drink, then take her to some back alley."

"I can't wait."

"Shut up."

I wasn't sure if they knew I was staring at them. A look of amazement on my face. A look of disgust. Hell, I'm sure there was a look of rage on there somewhere, because I knew they were talking about Quistis. What the fuck? Did they think I would actually sit here and stand for that? I didn't give a fuck if there was three of them and one of me. They were not going to be talking about Quistis like that. I just wouldn't stand for that type of bullshit. I could feel my blood boiling in my veins. It was like some volcano had erupted deep inside of me. I stood up so fast that my stool wobbled and collapsed beneath me. I was staring straight at the three jack asses, and I was not smiling.

"What the fuck is your deal?" one of them asked.

"You're talking about raping a girl," I growled.

"Yeah, so what?"

"So what?!" I cried. "What the fuck?! You're all fucking insane. That girl is my friend."

"What? You wanna join us?"

"Fuck you!" I yelled, taking a running dive at the man who had invited me to rape Quistis. I tackled him onto the floor and instantly began pummeling his face with my fists.

"You sick little son of a bitch!" I cried, relentlessly punching his face in. "I fucking hate you! You hear me, you little fuck? I fucking hate you!"

I kept punching him, an awful rage buried deep within, even as I heard gasps of shock and the bartender cursing. All of the sudden I felt a force pulling me away from the sick little bastard, and I instantly knew that it was his two friends. They pulled me off of him, holding me there like I was some kind of a trophy. One of them had my left arm, the other had my right. I wriggled and writhed in their grip, but it didn't do me any good. I was only one man.

I looked down at the bloody mess of the man as he struggled to get up from the floor. He was holding his nose, shaking his head in disbelief as he got up.

"Come on," one of his henchman rooted.

"Yeah," the other chimed in. "Show this little fuck who's boss."

I clinched my teeth and narrowed my eyes, glaring at the bastard who I'd just pummeled. He rubbed away a trickle of blood, then licked it off his finger. He grinned at me.

"You think you're big shit?"

He stepped over to me, ignoring the bartender's pointless threats.

He was standing right there, right in front of me. He looked me straight in the eye.

"I hope you don't think you're gonna stop us from raping your little friend," he whispered.

I spit in his face.

He slowly wiped my spit away, rubbing it off on his shirt. He chuckled at me, drew his fist back, and then punched me right in the stomach. Hard.

Fuck.

I kind of just numbed there, between his two jackass friends, like a rag doll. He'd knocked the wind out of me. I drew back, nearly collapsing in the grip of his henchmen.

I looked up, my vision a little distorted, already exhausted, broken from just that one punch.

"You like that, bastard?" he asked me. "Huh? Do you?"

He drew back once more and punched me in the stomach again. I felt tears beginning to form in my eyes. I felt weak. Fragile. Like I was made of glass. I let out a low, hard breath.

"What're your fans gonna think?" he inquired. "What're they gonna think when they hear their precious little rock star got his ass kicked in a bar? What're they gonna think when they hear their precious little rock star couldn't save his friend from getting raped?"

I looked up, giving him a cold stare. Even though my vision was messed up from the pain, I spit in his face once again.

This only pissed him off, and he punched me in the stomach again. My vision was getting black. It was a little too much. It was getting difficult to breathe. I let out a desperate breath, shaking my head in disbelief. This wasn't really happening. It couldn't have been. I literally felt something inside of me break. I was falling into some kind of darkness.

The last thing I heard was Quistis' voice screaming my name. Then everything went black.

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[Quistis' P.O.V.]

It didn't make any sense. Even me, a twenty three year old with a good head on my shoulder, couldn't make any sense out of it. And that frightened me. It was the worst feeling when you had absolutely no idea what was going to happen next. Then again, that's life. And maybe I should say that uncertainty excites me, but it's not like that. I find that uncertainty can be like a horrible knife. It can cut you down when you least expect it.

Why did this have to happen? Why did Zell get in that horrible fight? I had never been so scared in my life. Seeing him, just, being beaten like that. I raced to him as quickly as I could, and I was still too late. What kind of a friend was I? How could I let them do this to him? If only I hadn't had to call Xu, everything would've been okay. I could've talked Zell out of fighting. I could have gotten Squall and then the three of us could've left. Was I a failure?

Here I was, standing in this sickeningly white room. Zell's hospital room. Just standing here, with my arms folded across my chest. I could feel the worry in my face, but I didn't care if it was obvious or not. I was worried. Terribly worried. Somewhere, deep inside, I had an awful urge to cry, but I ignored it. After all, I had to be strong. I was the rock of the group, wasn't I? I was the one that had to stay strong for the others. I had to be the good guy. I had to be so mane things, but in times like this, it got a little overwhelming. I just didn't know anymore. I just didn't know.

I looked at Zell's sleeping form, the I.V. looking a little too pretty, with it's solution and with it's tube. I placed a hand on my face, shaking my head. This didn't seem real. Zell had a bad temper, but he knew when to let up. He wouldn't have gotten into that fight if it weren't for a good reason. But, what was the reason? My head was practically throbbing with thoughts. I needed a coffee. It hurt like hell for me to just, leave Zell's side like this, but it wouldn't take me more than five minutes. I'd be right back. After making a little promise with myself, I left his room and headed for the waiting room.

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[Quistis' P.O.V.]

"I see you had the same idea as me," I said softly, watching as Squall helped himself to a cup of coffee.

Squall nodded, moving aside so I could get a cup for myself.

"It's crazy," he murmured.

"I know," I agreed as I filled my cup with the hot, black liquid. "I wonder what drove him to do that. He must've done something to provoke those bastards."

"I shudder the thought," Squall said, leaning against the wall.

"It's been a crazy day, hasn't it? Oh, so much has happened."

"I'd say."

"Look," I began, taking a sip from my coffee. "I'm sorry about what had happened earlier. I apologize on behalf of both Zell and myself. The way we acted on the couch, it was totally uncalled for. I'm sorry, Squall."

"Don't worry about it."

"But I am worried about it. I really am sorry. I know it must've made you feel terribly uncomfortable."

"Yeah, well, so what? You really should stay concerned about Zell."

I tossed my cup of coffee into the trash. All of the sudden, it didn't taste very good. I folded my arms across my chest. Was that a little bit of a sharpness in Squall's voice? Was he upset with me?

"I am concerned about Zell. I was just apologizing for earlier."

"Well, lay off the apology. It's useless."

I couldn't believe Squall's coldness. What was he so angry at me about? I thought what I was doing was sensible.

"What? I'm trying to be polite."

"Well, don't bother. I understand perfectly what you were doing back there."

"Excuse me? Squall, please. Don't be like this. We were all a little out of it because of the blunt, you can't do this to me. Please."

"Whatever."

"Squall! I can't believe you! Are you hearing yourself right now?"

"Yeah."

"How can you be so cold? It's almost as if you're jealous of me! Is that it?!"

Squall simply threw his cup of coffee into the trash, shrugging. He took a few steps away from me, only to turn over his shoulder and give me a final look.

"I'm gonna go up and stay with Zell."

"What about me?!"

"What about you?"

And that was it. Squall disappeared around the corner, leaving me there, alone with my thoughts. I felt incredibly stupid. I had no idea whatsoever what was going on. Why was Squall so angry with me? What had I done to upset him? I had already apologized for earlier. It just didn't make any sense at all. I just stood there, trying so hard to be strong. I had to be strong, right? I couldn't break. I wasn't supposed to break. But it was just so hard. I couldn't help myself. I broke.

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[Squall's P.O.V.]

He looked so beautiful lying there. The lights were dim, but still. He just looked too pretty. I quietly closed the door behind me. I couldn't keep my eyes off of him. No matter how hard I tried, it was like there was some magnetic pull about him. I just couldn't help myself. I walked towards the bed where Zell was sleeping, in serious need of rest. I didn't want to wake him, I really didn't. I just wanted to see him. That's all, right?

I stood there, watching his gorgeous sleeping form. It was kind of sad, seeing him like that. Seeing that little white patch on his hand, with that little tube going up to the I.V. I let out a soft sigh. Oh, Zell. You poor thing. Why did this happen to you? Why did this happen to someone as wonderful as you?

I folded my arms across my chest. I don't care what anyone said. Quistis just didn't know Zell like I did. Him and I had been best friends since junior high. Quistis hadn't come into the picture since high school. I was tired of being the tagalong. It wasn't fair. It used to just be me and Zell. No one else. We didn't need anyone else back then. We could've saved the world. So why did Quistis have to get involved? Who gave her that right? Damn. I'm not a very good friend, am I? Quistis had always been there for me. She helped me study for tests in high school. She gave me advice when I found myself in a bind. She was a good person. But it was too late for that now, wasn't it? After all, I'd already acted like a total jackass back there. I couldn't help but feel extremely guilty.

I let out a sad sigh and crawled onto the bed with Zell. I simply sat there at his feet, looking at his sleeping face.

"What do you do to me?" I whispered. "Do you even know? You kissed me earlier. And I liked it. Is that wrong? Would you hate me if I told you that?"

He was so pretty. Normally men his age were trying to grow beards, putting on weight. But Zell kept up with himself. He was amazing. I don't know when I started feeling like this about him. I didn't just wake up one day and decide that this was how I felt. It'd happened over the years. I tried to deny it so many times. You have no idea. I felt like dirt back then. Feeling this way about my best friend. Hell, I still felt like dirt from time to time. No, it was more often than that. I felt like dirt everyday. Was I dirt? Of course I was. Zell needed me to be here as his best friend. Not to be some little queer that couldn't stop thinking about him fucking me. He didn't need that. He didn't need me.

And that was it. I couldn't take anymore. I had just been thinking way too hard. I collapsed on Zell, sobbing into his chest.

It had taken me this long to realize that Zell didn't need me. It was simple as that. I felt so stupid. I was selfish, wasn't I? After all, if it weren't for me, Zell could have Quistis and they could live happily ever after. Everything would be so much easier if I weren't here. So was it really right for me to keep ruining their lives by staying here? No, of course not. It wasn't right. It just wasn't right.

The tears kept pouring down my face, soaking Zell's hospital gown. I hadn't cried like this in a long time. I'd kept it inside for so long.

All of the sudden, I felt a pair of arms wrap around me. I looked up and saw Zell's face right there. I could feel his hot breath on my face. He offered a meek grin.

"Hey," he said softly.

"I'm sorry," I apologized, trying to wriggle out of his grip. But he wouldn't let me. He just held me there, as if he wanted it.

"Don't be. Why are you crying?"

"…Because you're hurt."

"I don't think that's why you're crying," he said.

"…It is," I lied.

"Be honest with me, baby. Squall. Be honest, Squall."

"…Baby?"

"Sorry."

"I…I'm crying because. I don't know. It's so much shit, Zell. And you do not need it right now."

"Tell me."

"No."

"Please?"

"It'd be easier if I were just you and Quistis. It'd be easier if I weren't around."

"Huh? What the hell?"

"I, I don't know, Zell. You and her could live happily ever after if it weren't for me."

"What are you getting at? We're like a family."

"Not anymore," I said.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I was an asshole to her down there. That's all, um, but that's not important right now. Why did you get hurt?"

"Huh?"

"Why did they hurt you?" I inquired.

"Well," he began. "I was getting a drink, and I heard them talking about raping a girl. Which is wrong to begin with. But it turns out they were going to rape Quistis."

"Shit. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have gone to play pool. I could've backed you up."

"It's okay. I'm fine."

"No, you're not."

"Look, I'm fine, Squall. Don't worry so much about me."

"I am worried about you."

And with that, I forced my way out of Zell's warm, although most likely friendly embrace, and began tugging at the hem of his hospital gown.

"Dude," Zell said, his voice a little bit nervous. "Dude, I have nothing under this!"

But it was too late, because I'd already thrown his gown up to investigate his stomach, and saw that he had no boxers on. My heart sank, but my cock got hard. I was staring right at his package. I just couldn't stop. Maybe it was wrong of me, I'm sure it was. But I just couldn't help myself, no matter how hard I tried.

He was hard, which kind of confused me. Quistis wasn't anywhere in sight. Hell, there was no female in sight. So why was he horny? And damn. It looked amazing, with his happy trail leading to his dark pubic hair. Shit.

Zell tried to throw his hospital gown down with his hand that didn't have an I.V. attached to it, but I grabbed the soft material by the hem.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" he demanded, although in a hushed tone.

And I, myself didn't know. What was I doing? Fuck. I just didn't know anything anymore. Everything was just a huge blur. That's all life was. And everybody is a little piece of color, just trying to leave a big stain.

"I want to make you feel better," I whispered, noticing the violet bruises on Zell's six pack.

"What?"

"You'll see."

And with that, I leaned forward, kissing his first bruise. His skin tasted sweet on my lips. So warm, so soft. Amazing. I made my way down his six pack, kissing every single injury. Healing every hurt with my mouth. Then I felt my lips meeting with his happy trail. I looked up at Zell, who had a bewildered look on his face. He looked adorable, although I wasn't sure if he was enjoying this.

"I'm sorry," I began, suddenly embarrassed. "I'm really sorry, I don't know what's come over me."

"No," he said, shaking his head. He offered a small grin. "Remember? Most guys are open minded."

"But what about Quistis?"

"What about her? Dude, me and her don't have anything set up. We're not steady or anything."

"But you made out with her earlier today."

"Yeah, because of that blunt. It's not like I'm cheating on her or anything."

"I guess."

"If you don't wanna do it, then don't."

But I wanted to. Damn, I wanted to suck Zell's dick so bad. But was it right? Should I be doing this to Quistis? Fuck that. I was tired of standing in the background. I'd wanted to do this for so long. So I took my chance.

I moved my head down, running my tongue along his happy trail until I reached the head of his cock, breathing on it. I heard him take in a breath as I opened my mouth. I wrapped my tongue around the head, pushing my head down on it.

"Oh, baby," Zell moaned.

I moved my head down even further, bringing more of his dick into my mouth, his head touching the back of my throat. I clenched my throat muscles and started moving my head up and down on his cock. Zell's voice moaned my name several times as I gave him head. I moved my hands up to his chest, massaging it gently with my hands.

"I'm gonna cum," he warned.

But I didn't care. I wanted to swallow it. I pushed my head down all the way, deepthroating it. He basically impaled my mouth with his cock, and I heard his breathing become airy as he shot his load down my throat. The hot, white liquid fell like a waterfall into my stomach. I moved my head up and licked my lips, looking Zell straight in the eyes.

"Do you feel better?" I asked him.

"Yes," he breathed. "Yeah, I do. Thanks."

"Sure," I said, and moved my head back down, licking his dick as it softened.

Zell moaned softly, tossing his head back.

All of the sudden, we heard the door open. I tried to look as if nothing had happened. Hell, we both did. But it was too late. It was obvious, with Zell's sweat covered face, and my position with my head so close to his cock. I was staring at the open doorway, a look of pure shock on my face. Who had come in? Who had seen Zell and me in such a humiliating situation? It was Quistis.

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Author's Notes: Alright, how was that? I'm sorry, it probably blew. But let me explain a few things. Zell is a twenty two year old male. Do you think he's really going to not want a blowjob? After all, he himself said that he's open minded. Oh, I hope I didn't lose any fans. Regardless, this is the first chapter that really had a cliffhanger. Hell, it's even a cliffhanger for me. How is Quistis going to react? Oh, so much drama. And thanks again to Maia and YukaYuka. I'm looking forward to your fabulous reviews.