Disclaimer: I don't own Yugioh, but I know some people who do.
*waves at Malik, Pegasus, and Bakura, who all smile and wave back.
It was a dark and stormy night in Battle city, outside of the arena two figures stood cloaked within the shadows. A short flash of lightning revealed the two to be Malik Ishtar and Odion. I wonder why they're just standing there, lets watch.
Malik: Are you clear on your orders Odion?
Odion: I am sir, but I still don't understand why you are going as Namu and sending me in as Malik.
Malik: It is because the pharaoh's friends know me as Namu from my contact with them. Also that fool Katsuya Jonouchi mistakenly believes that you are Malik from your brief meeting.
Odion: I understand that master Malik, but what exactly is it that you want me to do?
Malik: All that you need to do is convince everybody that you really are Malik Ishtar, and I'm going to help you do it.
Odion: But how will you do this?
Malik: It's easy, you just need some Malik lessons!
Odion: Malik lessons?
Malik: Did I stutter? I believe that I gave you an answer. You had better not disrespect me Odion.
Odion: A thousand pardons master, please begin.
Malik: Fine then, we'll begin with lesson one.
`
Lesson One. And Malik is?
Malik: Alright Odion, point to yourself.
So Odion stuck out a finger, turned his hand around, and pointed to his chest.
Malik: No you buffoon! You're supposed to point to your face, not your body! You are Japanese and were raised in a Japanese culture so...
Odion: Actually I'm Egyptian sir.
Malik: Shut up Odion! For the purpose of this lesson you are Japanese. Got it?
Odion: Yes master. *starts waving a little Japanese flag.
Malik: Now point at your face and say "I am Malik, and this is my face".
Odion: I am Malik and this is my face.
Malik: Now say it like you mean it!
Odion: I am Malik and this is my face!
Malik: Good, now that this is established we can move on.
`
Lesson Two. I know what I'm doing, why don't you?
Malik: Before we begin, would you stop waving that damn flag?
Odion: Sorry. *drops flag, then stomps on it a few times before lighting it on fire.
Malik: I asked you to stop waving it, not to destroy it! Anyways now we begin lesson two.
Malik: You need to learn how to order people around if you ever want to pass as Malik, let's start by having you command some of my Rare Hunters.
Odion: But sir, there are no Rare Hunters here.
Malik: That doesn't matter, we can find some stand in Rare Hunters. There's some right over there!
Odion: But those are ants sir.
Malik: It doesn't matter! They're Rare Hunters to you and that all that counts!
Odion: Ok? Hey you, Rare Hunter ants! Go out and do my bidding!
Malik: This is the point where you make a fist to show them that you mean business and won't tolerate failure.
Odion: That's right, I will not tolerate failure! So you two had better not screw up whatever job I gave you! *shakes fist.
Malik: Good job Odion. You were only supposed to make a fist and hold it there, but you went the extra mile by shaking that fist. With that we are ready to move onto lesson three.
`
Lesson Three. Da Fist Shaker.
Malik: Now about fist shaking, only shake your fist at your minions when you find it necessary.
Odion: Why sir?
Malik: It can easily become a very tiring activity, so you don't want to have to do it every five minutes. Now Odion make a fist.
So Odion made a fist.
Malik: That is stage one, a normal fist. Now clench your fist and shake it quickly.
So Odion did that too.
Malik: Now you are at stage two, you have an angry fist. You may or may not choose to begin growling at this point, that is entirely up to you. Now for stage three I want you to repeat lesson one on your angry fist.
Odion: *points at angry fist. I am Malik and this is my fist!
Malik: Good job Odion, now look at your fist.
Odion looked down to see that his fist had a really creepy Malik face on it now.
Malik: Congratulations! You have now made it to the final stage, you now have a Maliky fist. Use it well, for there is no better tool for threatening either incompetent minions or random passerby's.
Odion: Sir can we move on to the next lesson? This one is creepy.
Malik: Fine.
`
Lesson Four. Look the part.
Malik: Now we have to make you look a little more like me.
Odion: But why sir, wasn't the whole point of this to take their focus off of you and make them think that I'm Malik?
Malik: That was the point exactly, but I would find it offensive if everyone thought that I, Malik Ishtar, looked like you.
Odion: Ok?
Malik: Ok you have the clothes already, so that's one less thing. We do need to find you a blondish wig, I wonder where I can find one of those?
Odion: Well I always carry a blonde wig with me, we can use this one.
Malik: Odion why do you have a blonde wig? Are you really a transvestite?!
Odion: No master! I just like to feel pretty from time to time.
Malik: When these lessons are done we need to have a serious talk Odion.
Odion: What about the lesson?
Malik: Right, we have the cloak and the blondish wig, now you just need a sennen rod.
Odion: But where are we going to find another one of those?
Malik: We'll just have to improvise.
So Malik pulled a paper towel roll, a baseball, some tape, a can of spray paint, a magic marker, and a bag of corn chips out of nowhere. That's right, Malik can reach into nowhere and magically pull out anything he needs. Don't you wish you had powers like him?
Odion: What are you going to do with those master?
Malik: Why, this of course.
Malik took the roll of paper towels and unrolled it so he was holding just the cardboard tube. He took the cardboard and taped the baseball to the top of it, and then taped two corn chips to the sides of the ball. He then spray painted the entire thing gold and drew an eye on the front of the ball.
Malik: Tada!
Odion: Wow, I wish that I had that kind of talent.
Malik: There you go Odion, now you have a sennen rod too. Maybe next time I'll teach you how to use it.
Odion: I thank you master Malik.
With that Malik disappeared into the shadows, while Odion continued to force the Rare Hunter ants to go do his bidding.
To Be Continued
Malik: There you go kiddies. Now that you finished reading the story, you can go and make your own sennen rod! Just follow my instructions and you will do fine. Are you done yet? Yes? Good. Now that you've done that, why not follow every one of the lessons. Soon there shall be an entire army of Maliks armed with homemade sennen rods, we shall make the pharaoh suffer!
Random reader: Yes master Malik. *drools
Malik: Ha it has begun already! While you wait for the end why not write a review, or read one of Tsuni's other stories. They're recommended by nine Odions out of ten.
It was a dark and stormy night in Battle city, outside of the arena two figures stood cloaked within the shadows. A short flash of lightning revealed the two to be Malik Ishtar and Odion. I wonder why they're just standing there, lets watch.
Malik: Are you clear on your orders Odion?
Odion: I am sir, but I still don't understand why you are going as Namu and sending me in as Malik.
Malik: It is because the pharaoh's friends know me as Namu from my contact with them. Also that fool Katsuya Jonouchi mistakenly believes that you are Malik from your brief meeting.
Odion: I understand that master Malik, but what exactly is it that you want me to do?
Malik: All that you need to do is convince everybody that you really are Malik Ishtar, and I'm going to help you do it.
Odion: But how will you do this?
Malik: It's easy, you just need some Malik lessons!
Odion: Malik lessons?
Malik: Did I stutter? I believe that I gave you an answer. You had better not disrespect me Odion.
Odion: A thousand pardons master, please begin.
Malik: Fine then, we'll begin with lesson one.
`
Lesson One. And Malik is?
Malik: Alright Odion, point to yourself.
So Odion stuck out a finger, turned his hand around, and pointed to his chest.
Malik: No you buffoon! You're supposed to point to your face, not your body! You are Japanese and were raised in a Japanese culture so...
Odion: Actually I'm Egyptian sir.
Malik: Shut up Odion! For the purpose of this lesson you are Japanese. Got it?
Odion: Yes master. *starts waving a little Japanese flag.
Malik: Now point at your face and say "I am Malik, and this is my face".
Odion: I am Malik and this is my face.
Malik: Now say it like you mean it!
Odion: I am Malik and this is my face!
Malik: Good, now that this is established we can move on.
`
Lesson Two. I know what I'm doing, why don't you?
Malik: Before we begin, would you stop waving that damn flag?
Odion: Sorry. *drops flag, then stomps on it a few times before lighting it on fire.
Malik: I asked you to stop waving it, not to destroy it! Anyways now we begin lesson two.
Malik: You need to learn how to order people around if you ever want to pass as Malik, let's start by having you command some of my Rare Hunters.
Odion: But sir, there are no Rare Hunters here.
Malik: That doesn't matter, we can find some stand in Rare Hunters. There's some right over there!
Odion: But those are ants sir.
Malik: It doesn't matter! They're Rare Hunters to you and that all that counts!
Odion: Ok? Hey you, Rare Hunter ants! Go out and do my bidding!
Malik: This is the point where you make a fist to show them that you mean business and won't tolerate failure.
Odion: That's right, I will not tolerate failure! So you two had better not screw up whatever job I gave you! *shakes fist.
Malik: Good job Odion. You were only supposed to make a fist and hold it there, but you went the extra mile by shaking that fist. With that we are ready to move onto lesson three.
`
Lesson Three. Da Fist Shaker.
Malik: Now about fist shaking, only shake your fist at your minions when you find it necessary.
Odion: Why sir?
Malik: It can easily become a very tiring activity, so you don't want to have to do it every five minutes. Now Odion make a fist.
So Odion made a fist.
Malik: That is stage one, a normal fist. Now clench your fist and shake it quickly.
So Odion did that too.
Malik: Now you are at stage two, you have an angry fist. You may or may not choose to begin growling at this point, that is entirely up to you. Now for stage three I want you to repeat lesson one on your angry fist.
Odion: *points at angry fist. I am Malik and this is my fist!
Malik: Good job Odion, now look at your fist.
Odion looked down to see that his fist had a really creepy Malik face on it now.
Malik: Congratulations! You have now made it to the final stage, you now have a Maliky fist. Use it well, for there is no better tool for threatening either incompetent minions or random passerby's.
Odion: Sir can we move on to the next lesson? This one is creepy.
Malik: Fine.
`
Lesson Four. Look the part.
Malik: Now we have to make you look a little more like me.
Odion: But why sir, wasn't the whole point of this to take their focus off of you and make them think that I'm Malik?
Malik: That was the point exactly, but I would find it offensive if everyone thought that I, Malik Ishtar, looked like you.
Odion: Ok?
Malik: Ok you have the clothes already, so that's one less thing. We do need to find you a blondish wig, I wonder where I can find one of those?
Odion: Well I always carry a blonde wig with me, we can use this one.
Malik: Odion why do you have a blonde wig? Are you really a transvestite?!
Odion: No master! I just like to feel pretty from time to time.
Malik: When these lessons are done we need to have a serious talk Odion.
Odion: What about the lesson?
Malik: Right, we have the cloak and the blondish wig, now you just need a sennen rod.
Odion: But where are we going to find another one of those?
Malik: We'll just have to improvise.
So Malik pulled a paper towel roll, a baseball, some tape, a can of spray paint, a magic marker, and a bag of corn chips out of nowhere. That's right, Malik can reach into nowhere and magically pull out anything he needs. Don't you wish you had powers like him?
Odion: What are you going to do with those master?
Malik: Why, this of course.
Malik took the roll of paper towels and unrolled it so he was holding just the cardboard tube. He took the cardboard and taped the baseball to the top of it, and then taped two corn chips to the sides of the ball. He then spray painted the entire thing gold and drew an eye on the front of the ball.
Malik: Tada!
Odion: Wow, I wish that I had that kind of talent.
Malik: There you go Odion, now you have a sennen rod too. Maybe next time I'll teach you how to use it.
Odion: I thank you master Malik.
With that Malik disappeared into the shadows, while Odion continued to force the Rare Hunter ants to go do his bidding.
To Be Continued
Malik: There you go kiddies. Now that you finished reading the story, you can go and make your own sennen rod! Just follow my instructions and you will do fine. Are you done yet? Yes? Good. Now that you've done that, why not follow every one of the lessons. Soon there shall be an entire army of Maliks armed with homemade sennen rods, we shall make the pharaoh suffer!
Random reader: Yes master Malik. *drools
Malik: Ha it has begun already! While you wait for the end why not write a review, or read one of Tsuni's other stories. They're recommended by nine Odions out of ten.