Omake?: Ox Tipping

by Mel

One shot, for my sister Brittany, because she not only loves Hastuharu, but inspired this little peice of silliness. No pairings, cause I need to think of something in between bouts of hot yaoi action... that I don't write. ::sigh:: XP

- - -

Momiji had whined and wiggled and pouted all that the poor little boy could to convince Haru to come over and spend the afternoon with him. He didn't much like being left to his own devices, and Hatori was going to be busy with Akito for the better part of the afternoon, so his closest friend inside the Honke was, of course, his best option to alleviate such anxieties.

Of course, when Haru agreed, he didn't think he'd be spending the whole afternoon sitting in the main room watching a Mogeta marathon. After the third or fourth episode, he was having a bit of trouble staying awake. Momiji, usually a rather loud and rambunctious child, was sitting in awe of the unfolding storylines, and would only return to his normal state during the openning and closing credits between each episode, wherein he SANG the openning and closing credits. Loudly. Each time. But soon, even Momiji's singing wasn't enough to wake the poor teen, and he sat, sound asleep with his head propped up on his palm, somehow keeping himself from swaying or falling over in a heap of himself.

An hour passed, and Momiji realized, finally, that he had fallen asleep. Not wanting to disturb his cousin, he took the rest of his tapes and retreated to his bedroom, but brought back his blanket to drape over him. The cow slept on, now completely undisturbed.

- - -

"Ne, Gure-san, what are we going to ask Tori-san again?"

"Ah, we're going to pretend like Tohru is pregnant and ask what kind of things he might have done to her during her last examination!" Shigure giggled prettily at his long time friend. He knew that Hatori would never come near enough to touch the poor girl in any sort of sexual way, even accidentally, but he was so fun to tease, and you could tell just by looking at him that she reminded him of his former fiance. So, tease the dragon mercilessly and he won't stop to mope about what he remembers. That was the plan, anyway.

Ayame giggled back, nodding in acknowledgement.

"We're such good friends, Gure-san! No other friends alive would go to such lengths to cheer each other up!"

"Indeed, Aya! Ha-san will be forever grateful to us!" Shigure oozed, but then hushed as they began to near the doctor's house. Without knocking, they let themselves in and began their small search for Hatori.

Finding nothing but a sleeping Hatsuharu in the main room, and a giddy Momiji in his own room, they gave in and sat down.

"Gure-san! Tori isn't home... how do we tease him if he's not home?"

Shigure pouted, not knowing what could be done about their situation. He sighed and shrugged his shoulders helplessly.

"I don't know, Aya. We'll just have to wait, I guess... How about some tea while we wait? I don't think Ha-san will mind."

"Yes, please! I would love some, Gure-san. You're so thoughtful, always putting yourself out for others," Aya drawled, in that extra sexy I-will-seduce-you voice of his.

"Mmm, its always been a pleasure for you, Aya," Shigure practically moaned in reply. "And for me." God, they need to get a room. With a camera.

As Shigure stood and left the office/library they had been sitting in, he once again passed by Haru, still asleep at the table, and wondered once more to himself 'How the hell did he manage to fall asleep like that?' His mind quickly responded that it may be the ox in him that was to blame. He knew that cows slept standing up, much like most animals that resembled them. His brain then supplied a picture of Haru, standing in his room, clad in cow-colored pajama's, completely asleep. Umm.. no, he didn't think that was the case.

He walked into the kitchen and began to boil the water, his mind still, somehow, thinking about whatever it was he knew about cows and oxen and the like. A little smiled played across his lips as an idea came about. Quickly, he readied two cups of tea and brought them back to Aya in the office, where he quickly told the man his new plan to pass time while their first victim was away.

- - -

Quiet and calculated, two shadows slinked their way to the main room, then separated and sat on either side of the sleeping Haru. On the silent count of three, both snuck a hand up and gripped onto his shoulders, pushing him backwards which knocked his head against the ground, waking him up. He didn't wake with a start, but a slow couple of blinks, registering his surroundings before trying to rise again.

"What's going on in here?"

Three pairs of eyes shifted to the front door where an almost irate Hatori stood, holding his doctor's jacket over one arm to signify he was through with his day's work.

"Ha-san! Why, nothing, nothing of course! We were just, you know, trying to have a bit of fun until you arrived home."

"Yes, Tori-san! Have you ever tried ox tipping? I wasn't quite sure what fun it would be, but Gure-san ensured me it was very entertaining! Right, Gure-san?"

"Quite! Maa, our ox isn't being very fun about it, though," Shigure pouted, sighing deflatedly in the direction of Haru, who just sat there with a glazed expression on his face. He had hoped the boy would flop around, or get angry at them, maybe go black and try to rape them or something, who knew. Just something or than sit there and blink dazedly at the lot of them.

"Stop being stupid, Shigure," was all Hatori retorted with as he walked passed the room and closed the door to his office, locking it behind him. Shigure whined a bit, then shrugged. Having fun with his family was getting to be so HARD nowadays. Honestly.

The End.

- - -

Poor Haru. I hope he doesn't have a bump on his head. ::pouts:: ::rubs it for him, sticks her tongue out at her sister while doing so:: X3