Any Way the Wind Blows

A Sad, and Often Lamentable, Tale

Part V: Divine Intervention

Sirius had been raving for exactly eleven minutes and eighteen seconds.

"And—and—a BOY!?"

"You've kissed me before." Don't make it sound so significant, Lupin, thought Remus bitterly. It was only on the forehead.

The other infamous trait of Sirius Black was his ability to retort as though the flames of hell were licking at his heels. And when he couldn't come up with something (but more often than not he did), he'd have a good long sulk about it, which was almost just as bad.

"Yes, well, that's different! You're—you're—you're Remus!" This seemed to explain everything, in Sirius' humble opinion.

Yes, Remus thought. I am Remus. "Er, right."

Sirius shot him a Look. Remus rolled his eyes. "And besides, of all the boys you could have picked, you chose Snivellus?!" Sirius visibly shuddered, and Remus winced at the way he said the nickname, as though it was covered in slime.

"I hardly chose--"

"SNIVELLUS! This is nearly grounds for going through the bloody full moons alone!"

The silence that followed the statement was almost palpable. Remus paled several shades of white before all of his color came back in a flourish, redder and angrier than before.

There are many threats that Marauders could make to each other; not copying homework, squealing about a prank, and even hexing each other for good fun. However, there was area that no man was allowed to use against another, and it included anything pertaining to the full moon.

If Sirius hadn't realized why before, he was certainly about to find out now.

"Even if I had chosen Severus, which, I will have you know, I did not! He is still a far better boy than you'll ever even hope to be! Tell me, Sirius, why exactly you think I ought to be punished for something that had nothing to do with you?!"

This was one of those times when Sirius had no retort, so he began to sulk. Loudly.

"That's exactly what I thought! No rationale behind the IDIOTIC games you play with people. If you don't get what you want, or if someone else gets what you want," Sirius made an indignant noise, and Remus held up a hand. "If you can't get your way, no one else can, either, isn't that right? You'd rather have the ENTIRE BLOODY SCHOOL bowing down to your EVERY BLOODY NEED than to spend at least ONE BLOODY MINUTE thinking of someone BEFORE YOURSELF!"

Remus stood up, and even his small frame was terribly menacing. Sirius stepped back without prompting, though it was probably to save his life. "You are absolutely HORRID! What did Severus kissing me to do you, eh? YOU DIDN'T EVEN KNOW UNTIL JAMES TOLD YOU!"

Sirius had now backed into a desk, looking like a sulking deer caught in headlights. A sulking deer who knows that he deserves to be caught in headlights, but refuses to agree with itself on the matter. "Jesus, Remus! Calm down!"

"Why shouldn't I get my turn to yell? Why is it always you yelling at me, or you yelling at James, or you yelling at Peter? I think that, judging from everything you've ever done, it's about time you got yelled at, too!"

The door slammed. Remus instantly felt guilty. But feeling guilty made him more irritated than he had been before. Sirius deserved every word Remus had said!

Didn't he?

Of course he did!

Remus kicked the couch for good measure as he passed through the common room, heading for the portrait hole, and ultimately the library.

To accompany the echoing footfalls on the flagstone floor beneath him, Remus decided to review the Incident in his mind, because he'd been terribly brief about it before. It's just that it seemed to happen so quickly! In reality, it was much longer. (Well, not much, but longer than ten seconds.)

***

Remus had just walked into the school when that cold hand grabbed onto his wrist and pulled him aside. He'd looked up and seen Severus standing directly in front of him, scowl in place, but unusually edgy. Remus had shifted awkwardly, and Severus had muttered something and closed in.


That's when it happened.

James had shouted, Severus had disappeared, and James had, not realizing his mistake at the time, punched Remus then pushed him against the adjacent wall.

That's when he discovered that Snape had, in fact, left.

Back to the present, Remus wondered what exactly Severus had said, but he didn't get much time, as suddenly the aforementioned boy was standing in front of him again.

"Er," Remus said, by way of a greeting. Severus eyed him warily. "Um," Remus finished, when he couldn't think of anything else to say.

"He hit you," Severus informed him, voice quiet and shielded by the mass of greasy, black hair that hung around his chin. Remus blinked, but nodded. Whatever Severus said next, Remus didn't catch, because someone was shouting.

"Get away from him!" That would have to be Sirius. Remus groaned.

"You'd better go," he told Severus. The boy nodded, reluctantly of course, but nodded just the same. "Go," Remus had to add, when Severus made no actual movement to leave. He placed a hand on the boy's arm, and felt him tense.

Remus had to turn around, because Sirius, a raging ball of sputtering anger, was right behind him. "Don't!" Remus hissed, and when he turned to make sure Severus was far enough away, the boy was already gone.

"You idiot!" Sirius looked taken aback; a greater part of him looking almost sorry. Remus disregarded the greater part. "What's he done to you? Why must you always be such a, such a…" Remus was grappling for words.

"Idiot?" provided Sirius. Remus glared at him, and took him by the arm. Sirius stumbled over his feet as he was turned abruptly back in the direction he came from, Remus pulling him along.

***

It took some time for Sirius to fall into step beside Remus, but he managed to right before the reached the portrait hole; at which time, however, Remus let go and proceeded into the common room alone. Sirius slouched and began to sulk again before he decided that the best course of action would be to actually enter Gryffindor tower.

"Ow." Obviously, he had waited too long.

"OW!"

"Sorry. Aren't you coming in?" Remus didn't look sorry in the least.

"The portrait shut."

"You could have just said the password, Sirius." A moment of silence. "Please tell me that you know the password."

"I know the password!" Sirius snapped, and he pushed past Remus, stomping off in his full indignant glory, in direction of the dorms.

Remus wondered when he'd decided that he wasn't angry at Sirius anymore.

***

"Not here." Remus blinked as Sirius turned away from the dorms, pressing a hand squarely against the slighter boy's chest as he pushed him backwards. Remus flailed out his arms, hoping that Sirius wasn't trying to pitch him down the stairs. (And also hoping that the fact his heart rate had sped up wasn't noticeable to anyone but himself.)

"Er, what?"

"Not here!" Sirius reiterated through gritted teeth, turning Remus around and shoving him down the stairs. Remus stumbled and absently uttered a curse word.

"What are you on about?" Remus demanded as he managed to vacate the staircase – still living – and turned around to look at Sirius. Sirius shoved him forward (or backward, as the case was). Remus made a surprised little noise and hit an armchair. "What are you—?"

He didn't get to finish, for his mouth was suddenly occupied in an activity that was far more significant than talking.

Remus Lupin's mouth was occupied by Sirius Black's mouth.

Obviously, this was why he'd decided he wasn't angry at Sirius anymore.