Bring Back The Sun

10. The Deep End

I need a fresh start

'Cause I was in heaven

'Till this world fell apart

-"Sell My Soul"

When school started, Harry was happier than he ever remembered being. It was almost like he had a new lease on life, or some other over-used Muggle phrase.

He and Ginny were together, but not obviously so, and not grossly so, much to Ron's appreciation. They sat together at meals, held hands in the corridors, and only kissed when no one was around.

Neville and Hermione continued to 'date', but mostly they just did homework; Neville always wore a suit and a bowtie, and Hermione always commented on how dapper he was looking. Neville always blushed. And if Ron was around, he always tried to hide his sniggering.

Luna and Ron were awkward around each other, still, and it didn't matter how many walks they went on. Things were still weird between them, but it was sweet to watch them because you could tell Ron was trying very hard to be considerate and thoughtful.

Harry still missed Sirius as if a part of his heart had been misplaced and he had yet to recover it. Before he'd felt he would drown in his own miseries, fall deeper into despair and never reach the surface.

Now he felt he'd pull through, as long as he had an anchor.

There was no bringing him back, of course, and he knew this now; he'd reserved himself to the fact. Sometimes, out of the blue, Sirius' face would pop into his mind and Harry would feel the familiar prickling behind his eyelids, or the familiar constricting of his stomach, and the rapid beating of his heart.

But then, just as it had come, it would fade to the back of his brain and Harry would continue with whatever it was he was doing. The misery was only sporadically on the surface, but it was always there. Always in the deep end of his mind.

Harry missed Sirius terribly.

"Are you okay?" Ginny asked, leaning over to him and whispering his ear.

Harry nodded mutely and felt Ginny's soft hand reach to take his under the table. He felt better having her there beside him; he felt he could face whatever would come at him this year, whether it be Draco Malfoy's taunts, or Lord Voldemorts attempted destruction.

He managed to smile across the table at Ron, who was watching him nervously. Ron was always on alert, always ready for Harry to fall to the floor in agony and complaining of scar pain.

It drove Harry mad some days, but mostly he was grateful that he had a friend who cared that much.

"Quidditch practice this afternoon," Ron stated hesitantly, cocking his head to the side and peering at Harry.

"Fantastic!" Harry's voice was more cheerful than he felt, but at least the thought of Sirius wasn't so strong at the current moment. He swallowed. "I can't wait to get started."

And that was true.

Because Harry didn't want to wait around for something to happen. Harry was the type to make things happen himself.

After all, he was the boy who lived.