Haily-Comet: Perhaps sometime I can write a JP or DB fic. After all, I did JP in a chatroom once, and DB somehow grows on you...
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CHAPTER THREE:
Over time, I slowly began to feel more and more attracted to Hamtaro. It was creepy. I didn't think I had any control over myself. After awhile, I got to the point where I suddenly stiffed at the sight of Hamtaro, and I think I even stalked him a little back then.
Simply looking at him managed to remove some of my withdrawal symptoms. That's right, I was obsessed. I thought about him always, even in my dreams.
Of course, this started to hurt me after awhile. I never had a perfect attention span, I felt nervous all the time around Hamtaro. I tried to impress him with things, and I always stayed away from those things that could make me feel embarrassed. That's right everyone, I tried to make myself as perfect as I could in appearance around him. And sometimes, being perfect can be stressful.
Today, in the morning, my day started in a boring way. I sighed a little as I ate my food in a picky way. I slowly spat out the shells of the sunflower seeds in my mouth.
I walked towards the clubhouse. Always thinking about Hamtaro. Always in my mind. I was so absentminded in the process of my daydreaming, that I tripped on a tree root of the tree near the clubhouse entrance. I tripped, and my face hit the tree.
I suddenly heard Hamtaro laughing. And it struck me rather suddenly--he was laughing at me. I must have felt horrible. I had just embarrassed myself horribly in front of my greatest love. If it was now, I would have laughed with Hamtaro. But back then, I was already very stressed out. And I believed that Hamtaro thought I was clumsy. I couldn't realize that Hamtaro thought funny, not clumsy.
So I began to cry.
When Hamtaro discovered I was crying, he stopped laughing at me.
"Is something wrong, Bijou?" he said, rather concerned. "You know, you have been acting strangely recently..."
Then Boss and the others appeared. "Huh? Is something wrong?" he said in his gentlest manner possible.
"Everything's fine," I said simply. I got to my feet, and turned away from them. Then I ran away from the clubhouse as fast as I could, tears coming off of me.
~*~
I found myself at a tree in the middle of a forest, crying my heart out. You didn't know how stupid I was feeling. I had cried for the stupidest reason. I had basically gone into a tantrum just because I tripped and fell, and Hamtaro laughed at me.
Now I realized that Hamtaro didn't think I was clumsy. He thought I was funny. And what I should have done was laughed with him.
But this overbearing, dangerous love was taking the soul out of me. I needed help.
Somehow, back then, I must have been really lucky. Because, it turned out Stan was walking by. He noticed me sitting by the tree, with tears in my eyes.
"What's wrong?" he asked seriously.
"W-What are you doing here?" I asked, still sobbing.
"Well, I walking to clubhouse. I was a little late, so I decided to take this shortcut. And its lucky I did, because now I came across here, and I saw you."
I told Stan everything.
"Well why would you cry? Knowing you, you would probably shake it off."
"I know... that's what would've happened a few months ago."
"Well why now?" he asked, concerned.
"I've been feeling stressed out."
"Can you tell me the reason?"
I paused. There was a long, moment of silence. I looked into Stan's eyes. I saw trust in his eyes. I could see plenty a gentle mind behind his usual flirtatious attitude. He looked serious, and I could tell he really wanted to help me.
Stan waited for me patiently to make my descision.
After a long period of time, I finally spoke, looking at the ground.
"I think I'm in love... with Hamtaro."
I can't describe how much better I felt after I said. Suddenly, I was sharing the stress that was bottled up inside me.
Stan didn't look very surprised. "Love troubles? It happens all the time, Bijou, and to everyone."
I looked up, almost surprised, but more relieved.
"The main problem is, you are taking it too seriously."
"I am?"
"Yeah. But everything will be okay. All you have to do, relax. Hamtaro probably likes you."
"He does?"
"See, that's the problem," Stan pointed out. You are too afraid of that fact- that he might not like you. You just need to try to let all that fear out. Love is supposed to be one of the greatest things in the world. It's not something that takes over your soul."
I thought about it. Stan was probably right.
"It may be kind of hard to get over that fear, though. It's hard to get over almost any kind of fear. But its okay, Bijou. I'm sure you can overcome this one."
There was a moment of silence.
"Thank you, Stan."
"No problem. It's healthy to share your love, and love affairs to your friends. If you want, we can talk more."
"I'd like that."
~*~
Stan helped me discover what love really was. He helped me discover that attraction and love are two different things. He helped me overcome my fear of Hamtaro not liking me.
Stan also told me that I needed stop acting perfect. If Hamtaro truly did like me, Stan explained that Hamtaro would want to see the true me, not the perfect one.
And generally, my affairs with Hamtaro generally got a lot more enjoyable. Hamtaro and I could so easily chat about our casual life. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I got that he liked me.
~*~
And I could tell that Boss truly loved me too. He cared about me, he was afraid of me catching colds, and getting hurt. I ended up thanking him for that. It did make Boss blush again, but I felt that sweetheart could use some cheering up. He was a hard worker, and helped Hamtaro think of fun things to do every day.
~*~
I still didn't understand much about Stan, though. Even if he learned a lot about me, Stan only got more and more mysterious to me.
I mean, he seemed so wise... Why did he never act it? He enjoyed being playful and flirtatious. But was that in itself a mask? Like my old "perfect" mask?
But that didn't make any sense. Stan was always telling me to be myself. Which Stan was the real one, the flirtatious one, or the wise, caring, and helping one?
Either way, I knew that he was a good Ham-ham. He had ridiculously turned my life around right there. He made me just as happy as I was the first time I appeared at the clubhouse. I no longer had to try to smile. It just came naturally. I don't know if Hamtaro liked me better this way, or he liked me worse. But I was not scared if he liked me worse. I had learned to overcome fears like this.
~*~
So I had been transformed into the type of person who would almost never worry about anything. I helped Hamtaro with his main job that he had around the clubhouse--cheering people up.
~*~
I felt truly pure. Stan told me I born to feel pure. He commented, "That's why you have white fur. White is the color of purity."
I simply laughed at this strange remark.
~*~
Don't think that I didn't love Hamtaro as much. I loved Hamtaro just as much as I used to, probably even more.
I no longer had to concentrate on loving myself, I already did. Now it was truly much easier to direct all my love in his direction.
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Once again, I'm sorry that I made such a corny chapter. I tried to make a cliffhanger, but I suck at those, just like I suck at songfics... sigh. Anyways, I will wait for some reviews before I post up chapter 4.
\/\/\/\/\/\/
CHAPTER THREE:
Over time, I slowly began to feel more and more attracted to Hamtaro. It was creepy. I didn't think I had any control over myself. After awhile, I got to the point where I suddenly stiffed at the sight of Hamtaro, and I think I even stalked him a little back then.
Simply looking at him managed to remove some of my withdrawal symptoms. That's right, I was obsessed. I thought about him always, even in my dreams.
Of course, this started to hurt me after awhile. I never had a perfect attention span, I felt nervous all the time around Hamtaro. I tried to impress him with things, and I always stayed away from those things that could make me feel embarrassed. That's right everyone, I tried to make myself as perfect as I could in appearance around him. And sometimes, being perfect can be stressful.
Today, in the morning, my day started in a boring way. I sighed a little as I ate my food in a picky way. I slowly spat out the shells of the sunflower seeds in my mouth.
I walked towards the clubhouse. Always thinking about Hamtaro. Always in my mind. I was so absentminded in the process of my daydreaming, that I tripped on a tree root of the tree near the clubhouse entrance. I tripped, and my face hit the tree.
I suddenly heard Hamtaro laughing. And it struck me rather suddenly--he was laughing at me. I must have felt horrible. I had just embarrassed myself horribly in front of my greatest love. If it was now, I would have laughed with Hamtaro. But back then, I was already very stressed out. And I believed that Hamtaro thought I was clumsy. I couldn't realize that Hamtaro thought funny, not clumsy.
So I began to cry.
When Hamtaro discovered I was crying, he stopped laughing at me.
"Is something wrong, Bijou?" he said, rather concerned. "You know, you have been acting strangely recently..."
Then Boss and the others appeared. "Huh? Is something wrong?" he said in his gentlest manner possible.
"Everything's fine," I said simply. I got to my feet, and turned away from them. Then I ran away from the clubhouse as fast as I could, tears coming off of me.
~*~
I found myself at a tree in the middle of a forest, crying my heart out. You didn't know how stupid I was feeling. I had cried for the stupidest reason. I had basically gone into a tantrum just because I tripped and fell, and Hamtaro laughed at me.
Now I realized that Hamtaro didn't think I was clumsy. He thought I was funny. And what I should have done was laughed with him.
But this overbearing, dangerous love was taking the soul out of me. I needed help.
Somehow, back then, I must have been really lucky. Because, it turned out Stan was walking by. He noticed me sitting by the tree, with tears in my eyes.
"What's wrong?" he asked seriously.
"W-What are you doing here?" I asked, still sobbing.
"Well, I walking to clubhouse. I was a little late, so I decided to take this shortcut. And its lucky I did, because now I came across here, and I saw you."
I told Stan everything.
"Well why would you cry? Knowing you, you would probably shake it off."
"I know... that's what would've happened a few months ago."
"Well why now?" he asked, concerned.
"I've been feeling stressed out."
"Can you tell me the reason?"
I paused. There was a long, moment of silence. I looked into Stan's eyes. I saw trust in his eyes. I could see plenty a gentle mind behind his usual flirtatious attitude. He looked serious, and I could tell he really wanted to help me.
Stan waited for me patiently to make my descision.
After a long period of time, I finally spoke, looking at the ground.
"I think I'm in love... with Hamtaro."
I can't describe how much better I felt after I said. Suddenly, I was sharing the stress that was bottled up inside me.
Stan didn't look very surprised. "Love troubles? It happens all the time, Bijou, and to everyone."
I looked up, almost surprised, but more relieved.
"The main problem is, you are taking it too seriously."
"I am?"
"Yeah. But everything will be okay. All you have to do, relax. Hamtaro probably likes you."
"He does?"
"See, that's the problem," Stan pointed out. You are too afraid of that fact- that he might not like you. You just need to try to let all that fear out. Love is supposed to be one of the greatest things in the world. It's not something that takes over your soul."
I thought about it. Stan was probably right.
"It may be kind of hard to get over that fear, though. It's hard to get over almost any kind of fear. But its okay, Bijou. I'm sure you can overcome this one."
There was a moment of silence.
"Thank you, Stan."
"No problem. It's healthy to share your love, and love affairs to your friends. If you want, we can talk more."
"I'd like that."
~*~
Stan helped me discover what love really was. He helped me discover that attraction and love are two different things. He helped me overcome my fear of Hamtaro not liking me.
Stan also told me that I needed stop acting perfect. If Hamtaro truly did like me, Stan explained that Hamtaro would want to see the true me, not the perfect one.
And generally, my affairs with Hamtaro generally got a lot more enjoyable. Hamtaro and I could so easily chat about our casual life. The more I thought about it, the more convinced I got that he liked me.
~*~
And I could tell that Boss truly loved me too. He cared about me, he was afraid of me catching colds, and getting hurt. I ended up thanking him for that. It did make Boss blush again, but I felt that sweetheart could use some cheering up. He was a hard worker, and helped Hamtaro think of fun things to do every day.
~*~
I still didn't understand much about Stan, though. Even if he learned a lot about me, Stan only got more and more mysterious to me.
I mean, he seemed so wise... Why did he never act it? He enjoyed being playful and flirtatious. But was that in itself a mask? Like my old "perfect" mask?
But that didn't make any sense. Stan was always telling me to be myself. Which Stan was the real one, the flirtatious one, or the wise, caring, and helping one?
Either way, I knew that he was a good Ham-ham. He had ridiculously turned my life around right there. He made me just as happy as I was the first time I appeared at the clubhouse. I no longer had to try to smile. It just came naturally. I don't know if Hamtaro liked me better this way, or he liked me worse. But I was not scared if he liked me worse. I had learned to overcome fears like this.
~*~
So I had been transformed into the type of person who would almost never worry about anything. I helped Hamtaro with his main job that he had around the clubhouse--cheering people up.
~*~
I felt truly pure. Stan told me I born to feel pure. He commented, "That's why you have white fur. White is the color of purity."
I simply laughed at this strange remark.
~*~
Don't think that I didn't love Hamtaro as much. I loved Hamtaro just as much as I used to, probably even more.
I no longer had to concentrate on loving myself, I already did. Now it was truly much easier to direct all my love in his direction.
/\/\/\/\/\/\
Once again, I'm sorry that I made such a corny chapter. I tried to make a cliffhanger, but I suck at those, just like I suck at songfics... sigh. Anyways, I will wait for some reviews before I post up chapter 4.