Summary: Xander has an interest outside vampires and slacking off.
Crossover: Rurouni Kenshin
Disclaimer: I own nothing! You can prove nothing!
Feedback: Roin of the Cealm.
Pre-fic Comments:
Damn that little fanboy muse! And damn all plot bunnies too! You'll need a working knowledge of general anime to really enjoy this.
Words in Japanese be written like this, me hearty: "* blah blah blah *". The author takes no res... respon... it not be his fault if the words be put together wrong.
* * *
Mike, Xander and Rob were walking to the party, as none of them had sufficient funds for vehicular transportation.
"Hey, where'd you get these, anyway?," Xander asked.
"My Mum helped make the Kenshin outfit and modify the Saito outfit," Mike said.
"We had the stuff for the Sanosuke costume at my place," Rob said. "We just had to get some black dye for the 'Evil' symbol and a couple of plastic katana to go with Saito and Kenshin."
"Luckily, the new shop, Ethan's Costumes, had them on special," Mike added.
Xander had the covered mock zanbatou across his right shoulder, his right hand supporting it and his left resting in his pants pocket.
"Lucky for me this isn't real," he joked, "or you'd be looking at Xander a la Pancake. Very tragic story."
And then it was real. The ten foot long metal sword's weight pushed Xander to the ground, before Sagara Sanosuke caught himself, easily resting the massive weapon across his shoulders.
* * *
Spike wandered down the street, watching people run by screaming.
"This... this is just neat!"
Kinda like Christmas come early.
He spotted a few Japanese men down the road. Good, he felt like eating foreign tonight.
* * *
"*Demon,*" Hajime Saito said, spotting a grotesquely faced monstrousity stride towards them. He didn't recognise the other two men with him, but they had powerful presences.
"*Hold, demon,*" Saito said.
Spike, of course, had absolutely no clue what they were saying. "Nice butter knife. Shame it'll do you no good."
"*I want to fight it,*" Sanosuke said. "*I'm always looking for a challenge.*"
"What?," Spike said.
Sanosuke left his zanbatou on the ground, stepping forwards to attack the demon. He didn't think he'd need it against such a weak looking thing.
Spike was faster than an average human, and got in a good punch to Zanza's face. He was amazed when the human displayed no reaction.
"*That's all?,*" Sanosuke frowned. "* My turn.*"
He unloaded a massive punch into Spike's chin. The bleached British vampire flew back a few meters, then got up, wiping a trail of blood from his mouth.
"Who's been eating his weetbix, then?," he asked rhetorically.
Now that he thought about it, he didn't feel hungry anymore. Spike ran for it.
"*I'm not letting you go, demon,*" Sanosuke said. He ran after the grotesquely faced demon, quickly overtaking it and beat the crap out of it.
He dragged it back to where his sword was, then beheaded the thing. It took awhile, since the zanbatou hadn't been sharpened since the Onin war.
* * *
Cordelia spotted Harris across the street. God, it looked like he had been changed along with all the rest. She had no idea who he was supposed to be, but he had a huge sword. She couldn't let him kill the transformed five year olds. Even if the little monsters had insulted her hair. His loser friends Mike Robins and Rob Wilson were with him, changed as well.
"Stop that!," she yelled, grabbing onto his left arm with both hands. This only lifted her off the ground slightly when he raised it.
"*What?,*" Sanosuke said. He couldn't understand a word these English were saying.
Saito and Kenshin paused to see what was happening.
Cordelia stopped to think. She had gone on a trip with her father to Japan a year ago, and she could barely remember some words.
"*Children... transformed... kill them?,*" she hesitantly said, unsure of her words. "*Uh, don't kill! Sorry!*"
"*You speak Japanese?," Kenshin asked, a smile on his face.
Cordelia held up her hand, her close together thumb and index finger indicating how much. "*Little.*"
Zanza's face fell. "Chikuso."
"Let's go to Summer's house. She's the Slayer, she can deal with this."
Queen C paused. "You guys sure do look good like that, though."
* * *
Cordelia had somehow lost Hajime Saito on the way -- the thin, elegant man had gone off after something when whe wasn't looking.
Once the remaining three had gotten there, they'd found that Angel, Willow and Buffy were already there. Buffy was a semi-hysterical seventeenth century noblewoman, devoid of the skills that common women of the time had and lacking of their backbone. Willow had gone on at Cordelia to begin with, but Queen C had soon set her straight.
Willow was a ghost, and intangible to all material. They'd mutually agreed that she, therefore, would go to Giles and try and find out what was happening.
Sanosuke sat on the floor, zanbatou by him. He watched the drama of Angel pleading with Buffy. He had no idea what they were saying, but they were sure funny. Kenshin was sitting besides him. They quietly debated between them whether you could get sick of sukiyaki or not.
"You must have some kind of amnesia," Angel tried.
"I don't know what that is," Lady Buffy said," but I'm sure I don't have it! I bathe quite often."
The Irish vampire held up a picture. It had Buffy and her mother in it, in modern clothing. "How do you explain this, then?"
"I don't!," Lady Buffy said, on the brink of tears. "I was brought up a proper lady. I-I wasn't meant to understand things. I'm just meant to look pretty, and then someone nice will marry me. Possibly a Baron."
Sanosuke sniggered quietly in the corner. He had no idea what she was saying, but she sure looked funny.
"We'd better secure the house," Angel said, getting up from his chair. "Come on."
"No!," Lady Buffy said. "I want to stay with the men with the swords. Servants, protect me!"
He might not have understood the words, but Sanosuke understood the tone. He yawned, then closed his eyes, pretending to go to sleep. Kenshin remained where he sat, keeping vigil over the room.
"Well, I never!"
One of the student escorts, who had dressed as Dracula, burst through the unsecured kitchen door. Angel wrestled him to the floor, yelling out "Get me a stake!"
Kenshin quickly got up, moving around the two on the floor, ready to strike if the attacker should break free. Zanza cracked his knuckles.
Buffy looked through the drawers, panicky. "A what?"
The irate Irish vamp looked up at her, game face on. "A stake!"
The noblewoman screamed, then legged it out the door. The Dracula knock-off took advantage of Angel's surprise and ran for it too.
"*You're all mad,*" Sanosuke said. "*Those guys are pathetic.*"
Angel looked up again, surprised. "*You speak Japanese?*"
The gangster resisted the temptation to roll his eyes. "*No, I speak duck.*"
"*Those were...*"
Sanosuke got up, picking up his zanbatou. "*Those were what?*"
"Kyuuketsuki," Angel said.
* * *
Post-fic Comments:
Does Cordelia remind anyone else of Granny Weatherwax, somewhat?