Part 5: The New Job
May 28th 2003
Mac was sitting in Elena's hospital room watching her daughter sleep
"Hey Mac. How is she?" Harm said as he walked into the room.
"Good," Mac said "We get to take her home today. Sturgis is coming to pick us up later. He had to go back to work..." Mac was rambling and unable to look up at Harm.
"Well that's great that you can take her home," Harm said enthusiastically "You don't look very happy though," he added when he sat down beside her and looked into her eyes.
Mac swallowed, but before she could tell him what was wrong he understood.
"You heard about my new job."
"Yeah, I went down to see Webb and you know... I overheard you telling him."
"I meant to tell you first. I came looking for you, but you weren't here."
"Oh that's OK..." Mac said and took a deep breath "So when do you leave?"
"Early tomorrow morning I leave for six weeks of training. Are you OK with this?"
"You don't need to ask for my consent."
"But I am so can't you answer me?" Harm said. This was just like one of their conversations from a few years back when they were just asking questions and not answering. After Christmas they had developed a new way of talking straight to each other without fighting.
"You have my consent Harm. I'll be all right... eventually, but why... why the CIA?"
She had answered and they weren't fighting yet so maybe there was still some hope to get back to that place they had been before. At the same time that he didn't want to leave her, he also thought it might be good for them with some time apart to think and maybe she understood that too.
"Even if I can't be in the Navy I still want to serve my country and I get to..." he wasn't sure exactly how much he should tell her about his new job.
"You get to fly," Mac finished his sentence.
"Maybe this will be good for us. When I get back we've had time to think and we can finally have that talk."
"I'll still be here when you get back." Mac had slowly turned her head and was now looking into his eyes.
"Good, because I'll hold you to that..." he smiled. He was glad they could have this discussion so calmly.
"After Elena was kidnapped they offered me to talk to a crisis counselor. At the time I of course said I didn't want to, but I needed to. I went to talk to her, that's why I wasn't here when you came by before," Mac was now looking out the window seeing the birds flying to their nests with food for their children. She was lost in thought, but went back to look at Harm when he talked to her again.
"Does it help?" he asked. He was glad she was dealing with this, because otherwise they would both have to live with the fear that it would come back and hunt her again. She was brave, asking for help and excepting help.
"More than I thought it would, but there's still a long way to go. I'm going to see her regularly though and I think there's hope I'll beat those demons," she half-smiled at him.
"I'm glad you're doing that."
"I know..." Mac thought to herself that it would have helped to have him beside her and fighting those demons together. But now they had to deal with the situation they had. Maybe Harm was right and some time apart would help them.
TBC
May 28th 2003
Mac was sitting in Elena's hospital room watching her daughter sleep
"Hey Mac. How is she?" Harm said as he walked into the room.
"Good," Mac said "We get to take her home today. Sturgis is coming to pick us up later. He had to go back to work..." Mac was rambling and unable to look up at Harm.
"Well that's great that you can take her home," Harm said enthusiastically "You don't look very happy though," he added when he sat down beside her and looked into her eyes.
Mac swallowed, but before she could tell him what was wrong he understood.
"You heard about my new job."
"Yeah, I went down to see Webb and you know... I overheard you telling him."
"I meant to tell you first. I came looking for you, but you weren't here."
"Oh that's OK..." Mac said and took a deep breath "So when do you leave?"
"Early tomorrow morning I leave for six weeks of training. Are you OK with this?"
"You don't need to ask for my consent."
"But I am so can't you answer me?" Harm said. This was just like one of their conversations from a few years back when they were just asking questions and not answering. After Christmas they had developed a new way of talking straight to each other without fighting.
"You have my consent Harm. I'll be all right... eventually, but why... why the CIA?"
She had answered and they weren't fighting yet so maybe there was still some hope to get back to that place they had been before. At the same time that he didn't want to leave her, he also thought it might be good for them with some time apart to think and maybe she understood that too.
"Even if I can't be in the Navy I still want to serve my country and I get to..." he wasn't sure exactly how much he should tell her about his new job.
"You get to fly," Mac finished his sentence.
"Maybe this will be good for us. When I get back we've had time to think and we can finally have that talk."
"I'll still be here when you get back." Mac had slowly turned her head and was now looking into his eyes.
"Good, because I'll hold you to that..." he smiled. He was glad they could have this discussion so calmly.
"After Elena was kidnapped they offered me to talk to a crisis counselor. At the time I of course said I didn't want to, but I needed to. I went to talk to her, that's why I wasn't here when you came by before," Mac was now looking out the window seeing the birds flying to their nests with food for their children. She was lost in thought, but went back to look at Harm when he talked to her again.
"Does it help?" he asked. He was glad she was dealing with this, because otherwise they would both have to live with the fear that it would come back and hunt her again. She was brave, asking for help and excepting help.
"More than I thought it would, but there's still a long way to go. I'm going to see her regularly though and I think there's hope I'll beat those demons," she half-smiled at him.
"I'm glad you're doing that."
"I know..." Mac thought to herself that it would have helped to have him beside her and fighting those demons together. But now they had to deal with the situation they had. Maybe Harm was right and some time apart would help them.
TBC