Disclaimer: Yall know the drill by now, random insanity, probably best
those who can't handle mature words leave now. 18 etc etc...
Sephiroth threw his hands into the air, at long last the black materia would be his and he would be able to summon Meteor. The temple of the ancients was now gone... and the black materia was in his possession. Aeris of course was still alive, and not wanting to wait another second Sephiroth threw the black materia into the sky and started to summon meteor.
The whole party gasped realizing what he was attempting to do and Aeris shaking her head wildly stepped forward and opened her mouth as if to scream something when suddenly an eerie tone came over the skies, followed by a strange feminine voice.
"I'm sorry but the spell you casted could not be completed at this time. Please hang up and cast your spell again.."
Another voice echoed through the sky, the whole party, including Sephiroth looking around, lost, dazed and confused.
"You.... Old bastard... you used.... Meteo..."
Sephiroth looked into the now darkened sky as he cried out "No! I TRIED to use Meteor!! Damn useless Materia! WORK!!" Shaking the black materia violently and still getting no response, he slams the materia down on the ground and it shatters into millions of pieces; causing a reaction he did not expect. The whole area seemed to become unstable, and where the temple once stood, a swirling vortex of doom now stood, sucking everything and everyone into it. Aeris was the first to be pulled in, and as soon as she went in Yuffie and Tifa high fived each other thinking their main competition for Cloud was now gone; however they were the next to be sucked in, followed by Sephiroth and the rest of the party.
Everything then went black, no one could see anything, nor did anyone know where they were. Then there was... no not silence, a rooster crowing.
Cloud, Barret, Cid, Tifa, Vincent, Yuffie, and Cait Sith all woke up in a very small house on the outskirts of a town. Each one was freaking out, and for very good reason; for each was only one foot high now. Red XIII awoke outside on what seemed like a farm. There was a chicken coup, that had ten chickens inside, complete with ten eggs, two of which were gold though. The chicken coup looked very good for eating, however the sight of ten sheep and ten cows all sharing the same barn, looked like a better meal deal. Red slowly inched his way forward, until two things distracted him greatly. The first being that two of the sheep had golden fur, the other being the blood curdling scream coming from the large house.
Inside the house Aeris had just woken up, and she was in the same room, alone with Sephiroth. Granted they were in two different beds, but they were still in the same room. She jumped out of the bed and her braid was gone, and she was wearing shorts, her breath reeked of alcohol and she started jumping up and down, unable to form a full sentence yet. Sephiroth being woken up by her ranting and raving finally crawls out of bed, his long silver hair, covered by an ugly blue hat. He glared at Aeris before leaving the bedroom and looking at the rest of the shack heads outside, mostly to find a good weapon he could use to kill her, seeing as how the kitchen had absolutely nothing inside that he could use.
As he walked outside, a horse ran up to him, walking not only on, but also running through Red and up to Sephiroth. He jumped to the side just in time to avoid being trampled as well and that is when Hojo came from the gate, wearing odd clothes, and a blue top hat and hollered.
"Yo! Steph are you ready for the tutorial?"
Sephiroth looked around confused for this Steph person Hojo was talking to, but he and that damned lion were the only people around. He tried to speak up but found he was unable to. Sephiroth in a fit of rage started jumping up and down flailing his arms, and suddenly a scythe appeared from nowhere in his hands and he swung, just barely missing Hojo.
"Woah there killer. I see you found one of your many tools, so lets skip the rest of the tutorial and here is the basic info you will need to know. The rest of your tools are inside in a box under the window, there are 7 sprites in town that you can force to do work for you, and I highly suggest going to see them; and most importantly, while your wife forces slave labor with the sprites.... Go to the mines and harvest Materia... there are four types, and an ultra special type if you get onto the bottom level without passing out." With that said Hojo cackled and walked off the screen and back into town. Sephiroth completely baffled by anything he had just said thought about the word wife, and remembered waking up to Aeris screaming. Sighing he walked back inside to see what other weapons were in this tool box, seeing as how the Masamune was gone, and he was able to pull a scythe out of his ass on command now.
Armed with a knife in hand Aeris looked at Sephiroth and started screaming frantically "WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE WITH CLOUD?!?!?!"
Ignoring her screaming he dug through the box and picked up an axe, a hammer, a hoe, and some clippers. Grinning like a madman at his new weapons he took the axe and went over to the still screaming Aeris. He swung the axe several times... bewildered by the fact that for some god forsaken reason he was not allowed to kill her. Leaving the hut in a hurry he went looking for someone he could kill. Remembering the sprites that were mentioned he went off to look for their hut. After getting some directions from a nurse that looked like Reno and becoming even more pissed off that he was not allowed to kill anyone at all he found the hut and kicked the door in.
Cloud and the gang had just finally gotten used to their adjusted size and in their small hut, when the door flew open and smacked Cait Sith sending him flying across the room. Everyone went to reach for their weapons, but found that they were not equipped, and Barrett; whose weapon is his arm, found that for the first time ever in history, he was out of ammunition. Sephiroth grinned and was able to speak to them, but only a few selected words, that each party member started to say no to "Come work on my farm" they started to until Sephiroth found pure pleasure in the fact that he could attack them. He had the scythe out and was attempting to cut off Tifa's breasts but somehow Cait Sith jumped back up and knocked her over; she was still adjusting to the new balance, and his pink moogle was cut wide open. Each party member nodded their heads and marched out the door one by one to the farm where they would spend the rest of the day, except Cait Sith, the cat part of him walked out and a new Moogle was waiting for him.
Back on the farm Aeris had found a bottle of wine and was going outside to enjoy it when Cloud was the first sprite to enter the farm. Upon seeing this miniature Cloud she burst out laughing "If he's smaller then I bet his..." "AERIS!!" Tifa was the next one to waddle unto the farm and overhearing it all she kicked Cloud in the back of the head.
The rest of the sprites all came in, followed by Sephiroth who was grinning and swinging the scythe over and over; trying to hit random party members. So far the only ones who had not been hit at least once were Vincent and Yuffie, with Cait Sith taking the most damage. Before long he had given them all specific jobs to do making Barret, Cait Sith, and Tifa water the fields, while everyone else was sent to take care of animals. Sephiroth went and gathered eggs and was using them to throw at the three biggest targets... the three he had watering the fields. Vincent had managed to wrestle and tame the sheep and was riding one around, sleeping and hiding in its wool. Yuffie had managed to get the cows on her side and was riding atop their heads. Cid and Cloud were in the chicken coup and Cloud sat in the box where eggs where laid to hatch to catch a nap, while Cid stayed around attacking varying chickens getting each one pissed off, but he was fast and avoided all of them.
Once Sephiroth ran out of eggs he went back into the coop hoping that Cid and Cloud had done something to make them lay more eggs since he heard lots of squawking. Upon opening the door, hoards and hoards of pissed of chicken came flooding out and all with one target in mind.... Killing Sephiroth! He swung the scythe, but saw that like most people, including Aeris who was completely drunk and looking for more wine and some truffles, he was not allowed to hurt them; so he figured now was the time to go materia hunting. He went into the cave; the chickens stopped chasing him once he left the farm, and went after Cait Sith, and spent a few hours in the cave, and was able to hit the bottom level. Looking through the bag on his back he rummaged through the materia and found several good kinds, and deciding to take one more swing before giving up for the day, he found the ultra rare materia Hojo had mentioned. He pulled up the black Materia.
Not wanting to summon Meteor while underground he dashed back upstairs and went onto the farm. As he stepped onto the farm the first thing Sephiroth tripped over was a topless Aeris who had found too much wine and passed out. He went face first and landed in front of the chicken coup where all of the chickens had finally calmed down and laid down, with bits and pieces of Cait Sith scattered all over; still holding the black materia. Cackling like a mad man he stood up; and at exactly 3 p.m. the skies started to become darker. All the sprite like party members and Red went running towards Sephiroth at once; except Cid who sat near Aeris poking her over and over while she was still drunk and passed out. Just as the sun went pure black and then turned into a red ball of flaming death all of the running party members jumped on Sephiroth at once, knocking the black materia once again from his hands and sent it flying to the ground shattering it.
Once again everything became an unstable swirling vortex of doom and all were sucked into it again, and even a couple chickens and the sheep Vincent was riding earlier. Everything was dark again, and all was still.... Until....
End of Chapter 1:
So, what do you people think? Feel free to leave lots of comments, and I'm thinking of only making this a trilogy, if I even get THAT much ambition lol. Normally I would let the muses talk... but Sephiroth is so pissed at me right now, that its taking the bulk of the other half of my muses just to keep him from killing me.
Sephiroth threw his hands into the air, at long last the black materia would be his and he would be able to summon Meteor. The temple of the ancients was now gone... and the black materia was in his possession. Aeris of course was still alive, and not wanting to wait another second Sephiroth threw the black materia into the sky and started to summon meteor.
The whole party gasped realizing what he was attempting to do and Aeris shaking her head wildly stepped forward and opened her mouth as if to scream something when suddenly an eerie tone came over the skies, followed by a strange feminine voice.
"I'm sorry but the spell you casted could not be completed at this time. Please hang up and cast your spell again.."
Another voice echoed through the sky, the whole party, including Sephiroth looking around, lost, dazed and confused.
"You.... Old bastard... you used.... Meteo..."
Sephiroth looked into the now darkened sky as he cried out "No! I TRIED to use Meteor!! Damn useless Materia! WORK!!" Shaking the black materia violently and still getting no response, he slams the materia down on the ground and it shatters into millions of pieces; causing a reaction he did not expect. The whole area seemed to become unstable, and where the temple once stood, a swirling vortex of doom now stood, sucking everything and everyone into it. Aeris was the first to be pulled in, and as soon as she went in Yuffie and Tifa high fived each other thinking their main competition for Cloud was now gone; however they were the next to be sucked in, followed by Sephiroth and the rest of the party.
Everything then went black, no one could see anything, nor did anyone know where they were. Then there was... no not silence, a rooster crowing.
Cloud, Barret, Cid, Tifa, Vincent, Yuffie, and Cait Sith all woke up in a very small house on the outskirts of a town. Each one was freaking out, and for very good reason; for each was only one foot high now. Red XIII awoke outside on what seemed like a farm. There was a chicken coup, that had ten chickens inside, complete with ten eggs, two of which were gold though. The chicken coup looked very good for eating, however the sight of ten sheep and ten cows all sharing the same barn, looked like a better meal deal. Red slowly inched his way forward, until two things distracted him greatly. The first being that two of the sheep had golden fur, the other being the blood curdling scream coming from the large house.
Inside the house Aeris had just woken up, and she was in the same room, alone with Sephiroth. Granted they were in two different beds, but they were still in the same room. She jumped out of the bed and her braid was gone, and she was wearing shorts, her breath reeked of alcohol and she started jumping up and down, unable to form a full sentence yet. Sephiroth being woken up by her ranting and raving finally crawls out of bed, his long silver hair, covered by an ugly blue hat. He glared at Aeris before leaving the bedroom and looking at the rest of the shack heads outside, mostly to find a good weapon he could use to kill her, seeing as how the kitchen had absolutely nothing inside that he could use.
As he walked outside, a horse ran up to him, walking not only on, but also running through Red and up to Sephiroth. He jumped to the side just in time to avoid being trampled as well and that is when Hojo came from the gate, wearing odd clothes, and a blue top hat and hollered.
"Yo! Steph are you ready for the tutorial?"
Sephiroth looked around confused for this Steph person Hojo was talking to, but he and that damned lion were the only people around. He tried to speak up but found he was unable to. Sephiroth in a fit of rage started jumping up and down flailing his arms, and suddenly a scythe appeared from nowhere in his hands and he swung, just barely missing Hojo.
"Woah there killer. I see you found one of your many tools, so lets skip the rest of the tutorial and here is the basic info you will need to know. The rest of your tools are inside in a box under the window, there are 7 sprites in town that you can force to do work for you, and I highly suggest going to see them; and most importantly, while your wife forces slave labor with the sprites.... Go to the mines and harvest Materia... there are four types, and an ultra special type if you get onto the bottom level without passing out." With that said Hojo cackled and walked off the screen and back into town. Sephiroth completely baffled by anything he had just said thought about the word wife, and remembered waking up to Aeris screaming. Sighing he walked back inside to see what other weapons were in this tool box, seeing as how the Masamune was gone, and he was able to pull a scythe out of his ass on command now.
Armed with a knife in hand Aeris looked at Sephiroth and started screaming frantically "WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE WITH CLOUD?!?!?!"
Ignoring her screaming he dug through the box and picked up an axe, a hammer, a hoe, and some clippers. Grinning like a madman at his new weapons he took the axe and went over to the still screaming Aeris. He swung the axe several times... bewildered by the fact that for some god forsaken reason he was not allowed to kill her. Leaving the hut in a hurry he went looking for someone he could kill. Remembering the sprites that were mentioned he went off to look for their hut. After getting some directions from a nurse that looked like Reno and becoming even more pissed off that he was not allowed to kill anyone at all he found the hut and kicked the door in.
Cloud and the gang had just finally gotten used to their adjusted size and in their small hut, when the door flew open and smacked Cait Sith sending him flying across the room. Everyone went to reach for their weapons, but found that they were not equipped, and Barrett; whose weapon is his arm, found that for the first time ever in history, he was out of ammunition. Sephiroth grinned and was able to speak to them, but only a few selected words, that each party member started to say no to "Come work on my farm" they started to until Sephiroth found pure pleasure in the fact that he could attack them. He had the scythe out and was attempting to cut off Tifa's breasts but somehow Cait Sith jumped back up and knocked her over; she was still adjusting to the new balance, and his pink moogle was cut wide open. Each party member nodded their heads and marched out the door one by one to the farm where they would spend the rest of the day, except Cait Sith, the cat part of him walked out and a new Moogle was waiting for him.
Back on the farm Aeris had found a bottle of wine and was going outside to enjoy it when Cloud was the first sprite to enter the farm. Upon seeing this miniature Cloud she burst out laughing "If he's smaller then I bet his..." "AERIS!!" Tifa was the next one to waddle unto the farm and overhearing it all she kicked Cloud in the back of the head.
The rest of the sprites all came in, followed by Sephiroth who was grinning and swinging the scythe over and over; trying to hit random party members. So far the only ones who had not been hit at least once were Vincent and Yuffie, with Cait Sith taking the most damage. Before long he had given them all specific jobs to do making Barret, Cait Sith, and Tifa water the fields, while everyone else was sent to take care of animals. Sephiroth went and gathered eggs and was using them to throw at the three biggest targets... the three he had watering the fields. Vincent had managed to wrestle and tame the sheep and was riding one around, sleeping and hiding in its wool. Yuffie had managed to get the cows on her side and was riding atop their heads. Cid and Cloud were in the chicken coup and Cloud sat in the box where eggs where laid to hatch to catch a nap, while Cid stayed around attacking varying chickens getting each one pissed off, but he was fast and avoided all of them.
Once Sephiroth ran out of eggs he went back into the coop hoping that Cid and Cloud had done something to make them lay more eggs since he heard lots of squawking. Upon opening the door, hoards and hoards of pissed of chicken came flooding out and all with one target in mind.... Killing Sephiroth! He swung the scythe, but saw that like most people, including Aeris who was completely drunk and looking for more wine and some truffles, he was not allowed to hurt them; so he figured now was the time to go materia hunting. He went into the cave; the chickens stopped chasing him once he left the farm, and went after Cait Sith, and spent a few hours in the cave, and was able to hit the bottom level. Looking through the bag on his back he rummaged through the materia and found several good kinds, and deciding to take one more swing before giving up for the day, he found the ultra rare materia Hojo had mentioned. He pulled up the black Materia.
Not wanting to summon Meteor while underground he dashed back upstairs and went onto the farm. As he stepped onto the farm the first thing Sephiroth tripped over was a topless Aeris who had found too much wine and passed out. He went face first and landed in front of the chicken coup where all of the chickens had finally calmed down and laid down, with bits and pieces of Cait Sith scattered all over; still holding the black materia. Cackling like a mad man he stood up; and at exactly 3 p.m. the skies started to become darker. All the sprite like party members and Red went running towards Sephiroth at once; except Cid who sat near Aeris poking her over and over while she was still drunk and passed out. Just as the sun went pure black and then turned into a red ball of flaming death all of the running party members jumped on Sephiroth at once, knocking the black materia once again from his hands and sent it flying to the ground shattering it.
Once again everything became an unstable swirling vortex of doom and all were sucked into it again, and even a couple chickens and the sheep Vincent was riding earlier. Everything was dark again, and all was still.... Until....
End of Chapter 1:
So, what do you people think? Feel free to leave lots of comments, and I'm thinking of only making this a trilogy, if I even get THAT much ambition lol. Normally I would let the muses talk... but Sephiroth is so pissed at me right now, that its taking the bulk of the other half of my muses just to keep him from killing me.