A/N- Can I say that I'm sorry? Nope, guess not. See, the first week after I was finished updating, I chose the song 'Unwell' by Matchbox 20. But that didn't work out. So next I chose the song 'Where Are You Now' by Britney Spears in the second week. The song was pretty good, but I couldn't follow along with it. Midterms and a bunch of other stuff came my way, so I had to momentarily pause with this story. And finally, in the third week, I found a song!!! ^^ Hope you enjoy it.
Thank you for reviewing!: BlackPhoenix-sama- ^^; eheheh.death threats? *re-reads chapter* oops.^^;~Poppies~- o.O I'm a genius? *shocked* And about the thing posting everyday.*whistles innocently Plus, are you sure that I got higher math grades?
Kin103- Read the following statement-You are more obsessed then I am with Inuyasha. That is scary.
Twincool- Lol, that's what I call a cliffie/cliff hanger. ^^ I love to leave people hanging. *cackles evilly*
The Future Queen- ^^ Thank you. I knew that would be unsuspected plot twist. *big grin* See, aren't I nice?
KenshinOtaku- I just realized something. You must be a Rurouni Kenshin fan! ^^; And soon in my definition means in three weeks. ^^; sorry.
Italics-you should know by now for what they're for~Italics~- ditto
Let GoChapter Seven
Kagome sighed and put down the book. She had been reading 'Haveli', the sequel 'Shabanu', and just finished reading it. It was ironic on how she compared her life to that of Shabanu's. Falling in love with the wrong man. In fact, someone who was already with another person, a person not liked by the heroine.
Not much of a 'heroine' she was.
She leaned comfortably against several pillows, becoming depressed once more. Kagome looked around her and saw Sango and Miroku.
Sango blushed every now and then as he kept on whispering into her ear. Shippou kept looking at them, with a puzzled expression on his face as he pieced together a puzzle.
With the fire roaring in the middle of the hut, and the night sky showing in the doorway, the scene looked like a Hallmark card cover.
Kagome smiled and laughed silently to herself, before a wave of depression rolled onto her. She stared into the fire, eyes glazing over.
How can I be so miserable when the rest of them are so happy and calm?A giggle broke Kagome's train of thought. She looked up, and found Sango turning redder then ever.
"What is it?"
"Nothing, nothing," the tomato-red taijiya mumbled, shoving Miroku onto the floor. Except the shove was light and friendly, not one of the earlier, aggressive smacks she used to give him.
Kagome nodded slowly, knowing smile lighting up her face. Sango glared, but couldn't keep the face long. She broke out into giggles and hoarse laughter and Miroku went in for a tickle attack.
"How cute, should I leave the two of you alone?" she suggested, bringing back the love-struck duo to their senses.
Sango stayed silent as Miroku moved half an inch away, an amusing smile on his face.
Kagome looked back into the fire, ignoring the two. They had recently.more like several months ago.began a 'courtship' put to the Feudal Era's term. In Kagome's own terms, they had established a romantic relationship with each other. She thought it was wonderful, bad thing was, they wouldn't stop their cutesy antics.
It annoyed Kagome. Annoyed her like hell.
If only that could be Inuyasha and me.~Its been five months, since you went away, left without a worry, nothing to say~
She bit her lip. Kagome had been in this age for the past five months, going back to her own time once a week to retrieve some belongings of hers. Her mother understood her feelings; of course, her grandpa and Souta were puzzled. Being men, they were like that.
Inuyasha hadn't visited them. Any of them. Not Miroku, Sango, Shippou, or herself. It was summer already, and the other three hadn't heard from him half a year ago. Kagome, two and a half years ago.
~When I was the one, who gave you, my heart, and soul~
She leaned into her pillows even more, trying to comfort herself. She was the one who had given him all her soul. All her support poured into this decade, and helping him. He had stolen her heart away in the process, leaving annoying friends to talk about this mysterious guy who Kagome dated.
~But it wasn't good enough for you~
And still, he left her. Inuyasha had left her for Kikyou. That was the reason why he wasn't here.
He knew that I liked him more then a friend, and he accepted it. He even told me that he liked me more then a friend, too. But he preferred Kikyou's heart. He preferred a love that buried in the past and dead.
~So I ask god, god send me an angel from the heavens above, send me an angel to heal my broken heart from being in love~
It was true. She admitted it long ago that she had loved Inuyasha. And it wasn't a one-time thing either. Kagome truly loved him, and her passion for him was endless.
But, her heart was broken beyond any help that could come from her friends and family. Kagome needed someone stronger then that to help her get over this.
~'Cause all I do, is cry~
She had spent the first week in Sengoku Jidai crying. And crying. But it stopped eventually. That is, her crying in front of others. Kagome cried herself to sleep most of the time, falling asleep brooding about him.
~God send me an angel, to wipe the tears form my eyes~
Kagome grabbed a blanket that lay nearby, and covered herself. Even though Sango sent her a puzzled look, she didn't want the others to see the tears that were now streaking her face. This was the.fifth or sixth time she cried today.
The weight on her shoulders lifted considerably, but one still remained. And that was the question of where he went.
~And I know I might sound crazy, but after all that I still loved you~
Kagome bit her cheek this time, afraid that biting her lip anymore might draw blood yet again.
She had found a way to keep from screaming if she bit her cheeks hard. Really hard. Even though it hurt and numbness set in, it was better then experiencing the pain of her heart.
The sound of her heart beating, still faster then ever, and all because she was in love with Inuyasha.
~You want to come back in my life, but there's something I have to do, I have to tell the one I once adored, that they can't have my love no more, 'cause my heart can't take no more lies, and my eyes are all out of cries, so god~
Love. And care. I need those two back into my life. Love might still thrive in my heart, but it isn't here physically. And even though Sango, Miroku, Shippou and my family care for me, it isn't the same as Inuyasha caring for me. That caring was different. And I enjoyed it.
But Kagome knew she had to get rid of it somehow. Somehow, no matter what, this longing would have to leave her heart. And soon. Otherwise, she wasn't sure she could keep her depression at bay. And the amount of tears she had let loose might as well rival to the amount of water the river held each day.
~Now, you had me on my knees, begging god please, to send you back to me~
She had let loose her emotions in the shrine she helped re-build after it was torn apart with her first encounter of evil humans. Kagome knew it was no use to beg. But she did anyway.
Oh my gosh.I remember that day so clearly. I went onto my knees and I actually bowed. I bowed to the statue of the Buddhist goddess, even though I'm Shinto. That was months ago. Did it help? Yea, right.
~I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, and you made me feel like I could not breathe~
Kagome hadn't stuck to the three-meals-a-day routine. It was more like a meal a day, basically breakfast of some small fish and plain congee.
The only reason she wasn't sick in some hospital right now was because of her mother. Her mother had made sure whenever Kagome came back home, there would be a feast ready for her. Oden, sushi, sashimi, soups of various kinds, you name it.
There were times when she hyperventilated, feelings as if the very air drained out of her body. During those times, Kagome ran back to the Goshin No Boku, leaning against its trunk and feelings the air come back to her. It was as if the very tree was magical. And contained remedies noone would ever figure out.
~When all I wanted to do, was feel your touch, and to give you all of my love~
Kagome closed her eyes. And sighed, with a contented look on her face.
"Shhh, be quiet houshi. Kagome-chan is sleeping early tonight," Sango whispered.
Miroku nodded, and the two quieted down their decibel level of chatter. Shippou by then had already fallen asleep in his own Feudal Era like, bed. During the years Kagome had been gone, he had gotten used to sleeping by himself. So, no longer was there any furry, added warmth for her now.
Kagome imagined his hands, gently gliding across her face. His rough skin tickled her soft one.
When she opened her eyes, she had, once again, seen that he wasn't there.
Kagome closed her eyes quickly, before any tears could get through.
Inuyasha.
~But you took my love for granted, want my lovin' now, but you can't have it~
She knew what her mind had decided. She already knew that her mind had decided this long ago, even though her heart disagreed.
If they should ever meet again, she wouldn't show him any of her emotions or compassion. All she would show him was sympathy, for missing out on a love so true, yet he was so blind as to not see it.
~Oh, god~
What have I gotten myself into? My mind and heart are going in two completely different directions. And I can only follow one.
~*^*~
A/N- I have but one word to say to you. REVIEW PLEASE!!! .make that two.