~Chapter Two: Lost~
_...and they fell._
It was a short drop, although Hermione was not particularly glad to feel the bottom. She heard herself let out a loud shriek, and heard Malfoy curse beside her as they fell.
Ow... "Ow..." she said, coughing.
"You said it, Granger." They stood up and peered at their surroundings. It was difficult to see--faint twilight filtered in through the top of the hole, which was who-knew-how-far-up-above-them, so Hermione drew out her wand, pleased that it hadn't been broken in the fall, and said,
"Lumos." The light from her wand illuminated the space. It was a rough circular room carved out of stone, filled with dust, and all manner of odd contraptions. "It looks like a scientist's laboratory," Hermione commented incredulously.
"Don't be ridiculous. It's a wizard's laboratory."
Same concept, she grumbled internally. There was a low shelf all around the cave, filled with various brick-a-brack. There were broken glass test tubes, and an old-fashioned-looking sneakoscope or three, and various instruments that Hermione was not familiar with. There was a movement on her arm...
Slowly, Hermione turned her head to the right, as Malfoy did the same to the left. Their faces were about three inches apart. There was a pause in which they stared at each other. Then, much as they had done previously, they shot apart in horror, like two wet bars of soap under a heavy foot. They proceeded to examine the detritus by the walls with exaggerated, embarrassed interest.
Hermione recognized little of the equipment, but she heard Malfoy across the room muttering under his breath, "Oh, a Trimbletona discus...that's a Ferian's lamp..." and then he paused. "What's this?"
Pacing over, Hermione looked at the object in question. "That's an accordion," she deadpanned.
"Huh?"
"Never mind." She coughed to cover a laugh. "Dusty in here." Walking away, she turned when he said:
"Yeah. What's this?"
Spinning, she saw him poised to prod a spherical item with the tip of his finger. It looked suspicious. "Don't--" she started.
The world turned upside-down. Literally. Then she blacked out.
*********
"This is beginning to become a pattern," said Hermione, after she and Malfoy had, once again, shot apart from one another, not unlike the time Neville had ripped a hole in his...never mind. Looking around, she saw...nothing. It was foggy. More foggy than she thought any place could be. She couldn't see an inch in front of her nose. "You still there? Where are we?"
"How am I supposed to know that?"
Reaching down, she felt the ground beneath her feet. Instead of feeling dusty rock, she felt wet underbrush. Recoiling, she wiped her hand on her robe. Then she turned to where Malfoy's voice had come from. "I think we're lost. What did you do, Malfoy?!"
"I didn't do anything!"
"Yes you did! You touched that thing! I told you not to touch that thing!"
"No, you DIDN'T!"
"I tried to, but then you touched it!"
"Touched what?"
"That's what I want to know!"
"Well, what is it?"
"Malfoy, why would you touch something in the wizarding world if you DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS?!!!!"
"It's a bad habit. I've been trying to break it. I'm thinking of getting the patch."
"Ugh! This is not the time for joking!"
"I'm not joking. I'm completely serious."
"Ugh! I can't believe you touched it! Now we're stuck in the middle of somewhere without a clue where we are!"
"Good one, Granger. Now try to demuddle that for me."
"Ugh! You are an insufferable prat!"
"More with the grunting."
Hermione took a deep breath and let it out slowly in an attempt to calm herself. "All right. We have to look at this logically. First question: where are we?"
"We appear to be in the middle of a dense fog."
"Why, thank you, Malfoy. I don't think I would have noticed, had you not made that observation."
"So second question?"
Wow. Malfoy's actually attempting to cooperate. That's interesting. "Second question: how did we get here?"
"Well, that much is obvious. I touched that thing--"
"Ha! I told you you touched that thing!"
"Yes, well, I touched that thing, and it brought us here."
"Yes, but what was it? And how did it bring us here?"
"I think we've already established that we don't know what the thing was. And as for the second part, I have no idea."
"You're very helpful."
"I know."
"Ugh. Okay. Third question: how do we find out where we are?"
"Hmm...good question. Finally."
"Excuse me, but my questions are all--"
"Granger, please. I'm trying to think."
"Oh yes, I forgot how much effort that takes for you."
She had the distinct impression that he was rolling his eyes. "Okay. How we find out where we are. Well, I think we won't be able to do that until this fog goes away."
"Which brings me to question four: will the fog go away?"
"It will go away."
"But what if it doesn't?"
"It will. Relax, Granger."
"Relax? You're telling me to relax? We have no idea where we are, how we got here, or when we'll get out, and worst of all, I'm with you, and you're telling me to relax. That's rich."
"Rassafriggamfraggam..."
"What was that?"
"Nothing. Question five?"
"Should we try to get out of the fog or wait for it to clear?"
"Both."
"What?" Hermione did not understand how they could do both.
"We sleep, here-- it must be late by now, and I know I'm tired. Then, if the fog isn't gone when we wake up, we explore."
"Oh. Well...I guess...we could try that."
There was a pause.
"How do we sleep? The ground is all wet."
"Are you telling me you don't know a spell to fix that?"
"Of course I have a spell to fix that, I just--" she cut herself off. "All right." Drawing her wand out of her pocket, she spoke. "Aridus," she said matter-of-factly, and the next step she took found dry, crackling leaves beneath her foot.
"Not bad."
"Shut up."
"I suppose we should, um, sleep, you know...back-to-back. For, you know, for safety."
"Are you scared, Malfoy?"
"No, I'm not scared, Granger, I'm just--" there was a slight pause, and Hermione could tell he was searching desperately for an answer. "I'm willing to bet that you might be frightened. You know. Of an unknown place. Can't see anything. You know."
"For your information, I am not...not...er...let's sleep back-to-back."
*********
Authors' note: So...this is turning out to be mostly dialogue. But that's okay. Because we like the dialogue, and we find it extremely funny. And that's what counts, in our estimation.
Pluggy McPluggerson: _No Longer An Enemy_ by Plaidlylush, because we love that fic, _Pick Up the Pieces_ by Lyra Silvertongue2, because we love that fic, and _Sirius Black and the Stars in the Sky_ by mysticweirdo, because we love that fic.
Rainbow balloon animals to anyone who reviews. ::hugs all around from Sarah and Deva::