Ms. Minerva McGonagall
Assistant Headmistress
Transfiguration Professor
Jul. 7, 1996
Miss Granger,
I apologize for my hasty letter, but I haven't much time. If it is convenient for you, will you please meet me at the Leaky Cauldron at half past six?
Professor McGonagall
Professor,
I can be there, but a friend of mine will have to come. He's perfectly reliable; won't tell a word we say if I ask.
Hermione
CONVERSATION BETWEEN MINERVA MCGONAGALL, HERMIONE GRANGER AND VIKTOR KRUM IN THE LEAKY CAULDRON
HG: Hello, Professor. I was surprised when I got your letter. Is something wrong?
MM: Oh no, nothing. This must be your friend.
VK: Hello.
HG: This is Viktor Krum. He and his family are visiting us; there was a Quidditch match last week. Bulgaria vs. England.
MM: I'm sorry; I don't follow Quidditch much.
VK: Ve von.
MM: Congratulations.
HG: What was it you wanted to talk to me about?
MM: Oh, yes. You've certainly heard about the trial they're having on Fudge's administration?
HG: Of course.
MM: Then you know they're considering me for head of Gryphon Department of the League of Aurors.
HG: No, I didn't. What will you do about teaching if you get the job?
MM: That's why I wanted to speak with you. I already talked to Professor Dumbledore, and he agrees with my decision. Have you received the results of your O.W.L.s yet?
HG: No...
MM: The teachers have seen the student grades. And Hermione, you got a T. On every single one of your O.W.L.s.
HG: A T? Then Fred and George weren't joking? How could I —
MM: Miss Granger, T does not stand for Troll, regardless of that ridiculous rumor someone or other has been spreading since Professor Dumbledore was in school. There is and above O pass that teachers rarely bother mentioning, because no one has gotten it since the fourteenth century. There's D, P, A, E, O, and then T, Transcendent.
VK: Vell, that's a vord you don't hear often.
HG: Transcendent? What does that mean? I mean, what was my score?
MM: You answered every question far above expectations and every bonus, too. You earn a T when you receive more than 50% above an O.
HG: So I had a score of 150%?
MM: No. You had a score of 200%.
HG: 200?
MM: Yes. On almost all your exams.
HG: Almost...all...
MM: So what I'm asking is if you'll take my classes and serve as Assistant Headmistress if I do become the Gryphon Head.
HG: Bur Professor, I'm only a sixth year! What if the seventh years won't respect me? What if everyone fails? What if —
MM: Miss Granger, please calm down. None of the students will fail, especially not with you teaching them. I know you tutor Mr. Weasley and Mr. Potter night and day.
HG: More like they steal my notes and copy them all.
MM: Nevertheless, their grades went up considerably with your help.
HG: But how will I learn the course material? For Transfiguration and my other classes?
MM: I've arranged for you to take the courses over mail. There's a teacher here in London who does this for students who learn at home. I've spoken to her as well. She'll send you the assignments, and you just have to complete them and send them back. They're exactly the same ones that the other Hogwarts students will be getting.
HG: But what if the older students won't listen to me?
MM: That is why you are allowed all the privileges of being a teacher.
HG/VK: All of them?
MM: Yes. You can give and take away points, give detentions, go into the teacher's lounge, and you may even enter other Houses' dormitories.
HG: Do I pick the textbook for the year?
MM: Yes, as long as it corresponds well with the required knowledge for the classes. The Standard Book of Spells is always required, of course, and I usually don't bother assigning a separate textbook for Transfiguration. However, if you would like to, simply send the title and author to Professor Snape.
HG: SNAPE?!
MM: Professor Snape. Yes, he'll be the Headmaster if Professor Dumbledore becomes Junior Undersecretary. The headmaster selected him himself.
HG: But what if the other teachers laugh at me?
MM: I assure you, none of the staff would dare laugh at you, not after those scores.
HG: Eh...
MM: So would you like to take the job?...Hermione?
HG: How soon do I have to be at Hogwarts?
MM: You need to have a course planned as soon as possible. Here's the list of benchmarks. As long as you center your curriculum around it, you can do just about anything. Oh, and another thing?
HG: Yes?
MM: You'll be paid.
HG: Paid?!
MM: Yes. You are a teacher now, of course you'll be paid. It's not a lot; teachers' salaries rarely are.
HG: It'll be more than my allowance at any rate. I can be at Hogwarts tomorrow if you get the job.
MM: Perfect. All you have to do is sign this paper, and you're not of age, so your parents will have to sign as well.
HG: I'm sure they will. I've really got to go. We're going to a restaurant in Muggle London tonight with Viktor's family.
MM: Thank you very much.
HG: You're welcome.
CONVERSATION BETWEEN HERMIONE GRANGER, HELEN GRANGER AND MENELAUS GRANGER
Helen: Hermione, do you really think this is a good choice?
Hermione: Of course, Mum; if I didn't I wouldn't have agreed!
Menelaus: Hermione, you know we'll support you in most everything you choose, but I just don't think this was a wise decision.
Helen: On your part or your professor's.
Hermione: But I know the curriculum! I could've aced the N.E.W.T.s when I was a first year!
Helen: But we want you to be with other students your age.
Menelaus: You only have to deal with school for a little while. You'll have to deal with people for the rest of your life.
Hermione: I can handle people! I have lots of friends!
Helen: They're all boys, Hermione.
Hermione: THEY ARE NOT MY BOYFRIENDS!!! I can have FRIENDS who are boys, thank you very much! Just because I'm a GIRL doesn't mean every boy I know is a BOYFRIEND!
Helen: That's not what I was implying at all! I just wish you'd make friends with a few more girls, Hermione!
Hermione: I HAVE friends who are girls! Any time I get sick of Ron and Harry, I go talk to Ginny.
Helen: That little girl who has a crush on your boyfriend?
Hermione: HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!
Hermione runs upstairs and slams the door to her room. From the downstairs guest room, the Krums are emerging, Mr. Krum and Viktor in jackets and ties, and Mrs. Krum in a nice party dress. Mr. and Mrs. Granger are dressed similarly. Viktor looks in the direction of Hermione's room.
Viktor: I vill talk to her.
CONVERSATION BETWEEN HERMIONE GRANGER AND VIKTOR KRUM
VK: Hermione?
HG: Well done. You finally got my name right.
VK: You know, the vun thing about being vell-known I don't get used to is being made fun off.
HG: Sorry, Viktor. Mum and Dad just made me so...ugh. It's so unfair.
VK: You know, you could still get the job.
HG: But Mom and Dad won't sign it.
VK: I could.
HG: Viktor!
VK: Quiet! I've seen your parents' signatures. It vouldn't be hard at all to imitate their handwriting. And you really vant this.
HG: You're the best friend in the world.
VK: On vun condition.
HG: What? If you ask me to sleep with you, I'll hex you into next April.
VK: I'd never ask you that! No. I just vant a kiss.
HG: I don't know...
VK: Just vun. Kiss me and you can have this job.
HG: Er...
EXCERPT FROM HERMIONE GRANGER'S DIARY
7/7/96
I feel so terribly guilty. I disobeyed my parents and had Viktor help me with it, too. And I kissed him so he would do it. It's almost prostitution! Oh, now I feel really bad.
And the worst part is, it was a wonderful kiss.
Jul. 7, 1996
Miss Granger,
I apologize for my hasty letter, but I haven't much time. If it is convenient for you, will you please meet me at the Leaky Cauldron at half past six?
Professor McGonagall
Professor,
I can be there, but a friend of mine will have to come. He's perfectly reliable; won't tell a word we say if I ask.
Hermione
CONVERSATION BETWEEN MINERVA MCGONAGALL, HERMIONE GRANGER AND VIKTOR KRUM IN THE LEAKY CAULDRON
HG: Hello, Professor. I was surprised when I got your letter. Is something wrong?
MM: Oh no, nothing. This must be your friend.
VK: Hello.
HG: This is Viktor Krum. He and his family are visiting us; there was a Quidditch match last week. Bulgaria vs. England.
MM: I'm sorry; I don't follow Quidditch much.
VK: Ve von.
MM: Congratulations.
HG: What was it you wanted to talk to me about?
MM: Oh, yes. You've certainly heard about the trial they're having on Fudge's administration?
HG: Of course.
MM: Then you know they're considering me for head of Gryphon Department of the League of Aurors.
HG: No, I didn't. What will you do about teaching if you get the job?
MM: That's why I wanted to speak with you. I already talked to Professor Dumbledore, and he agrees with my decision. Have you received the results of your O.W.L.s yet?
HG: No...
MM: The teachers have seen the student grades. And Hermione, you got a T. On every single one of your O.W.L.s.
HG: A T? Then Fred and George weren't joking? How could I —
MM: Miss Granger, T does not stand for Troll, regardless of that ridiculous rumor someone or other has been spreading since Professor Dumbledore was in school. There is and above O pass that teachers rarely bother mentioning, because no one has gotten it since the fourteenth century. There's D, P, A, E, O, and then T, Transcendent.
VK: Vell, that's a vord you don't hear often.
HG: Transcendent? What does that mean? I mean, what was my score?
MM: You answered every question far above expectations and every bonus, too. You earn a T when you receive more than 50% above an O.
HG: So I had a score of 150%?
MM: No. You had a score of 200%.
HG: 200?
MM: Yes. On almost all your exams.
HG: Almost...all...
MM: So what I'm asking is if you'll take my classes and serve as Assistant Headmistress if I do become the Gryphon Head.
HG: Bur Professor, I'm only a sixth year! What if the seventh years won't respect me? What if everyone fails? What if —
MM: Miss Granger, please calm down. None of the students will fail, especially not with you teaching them. I know you tutor Mr. Weasley and Mr. Potter night and day.
HG: More like they steal my notes and copy them all.
MM: Nevertheless, their grades went up considerably with your help.
HG: But how will I learn the course material? For Transfiguration and my other classes?
MM: I've arranged for you to take the courses over mail. There's a teacher here in London who does this for students who learn at home. I've spoken to her as well. She'll send you the assignments, and you just have to complete them and send them back. They're exactly the same ones that the other Hogwarts students will be getting.
HG: But what if the older students won't listen to me?
MM: That is why you are allowed all the privileges of being a teacher.
HG/VK: All of them?
MM: Yes. You can give and take away points, give detentions, go into the teacher's lounge, and you may even enter other Houses' dormitories.
HG: Do I pick the textbook for the year?
MM: Yes, as long as it corresponds well with the required knowledge for the classes. The Standard Book of Spells is always required, of course, and I usually don't bother assigning a separate textbook for Transfiguration. However, if you would like to, simply send the title and author to Professor Snape.
HG: SNAPE?!
MM: Professor Snape. Yes, he'll be the Headmaster if Professor Dumbledore becomes Junior Undersecretary. The headmaster selected him himself.
HG: But what if the other teachers laugh at me?
MM: I assure you, none of the staff would dare laugh at you, not after those scores.
HG: Eh...
MM: So would you like to take the job?...Hermione?
HG: How soon do I have to be at Hogwarts?
MM: You need to have a course planned as soon as possible. Here's the list of benchmarks. As long as you center your curriculum around it, you can do just about anything. Oh, and another thing?
HG: Yes?
MM: You'll be paid.
HG: Paid?!
MM: Yes. You are a teacher now, of course you'll be paid. It's not a lot; teachers' salaries rarely are.
HG: It'll be more than my allowance at any rate. I can be at Hogwarts tomorrow if you get the job.
MM: Perfect. All you have to do is sign this paper, and you're not of age, so your parents will have to sign as well.
HG: I'm sure they will. I've really got to go. We're going to a restaurant in Muggle London tonight with Viktor's family.
MM: Thank you very much.
HG: You're welcome.
CONVERSATION BETWEEN HERMIONE GRANGER, HELEN GRANGER AND MENELAUS GRANGER
Helen: Hermione, do you really think this is a good choice?
Hermione: Of course, Mum; if I didn't I wouldn't have agreed!
Menelaus: Hermione, you know we'll support you in most everything you choose, but I just don't think this was a wise decision.
Helen: On your part or your professor's.
Hermione: But I know the curriculum! I could've aced the N.E.W.T.s when I was a first year!
Helen: But we want you to be with other students your age.
Menelaus: You only have to deal with school for a little while. You'll have to deal with people for the rest of your life.
Hermione: I can handle people! I have lots of friends!
Helen: They're all boys, Hermione.
Hermione: THEY ARE NOT MY BOYFRIENDS!!! I can have FRIENDS who are boys, thank you very much! Just because I'm a GIRL doesn't mean every boy I know is a BOYFRIEND!
Helen: That's not what I was implying at all! I just wish you'd make friends with a few more girls, Hermione!
Hermione: I HAVE friends who are girls! Any time I get sick of Ron and Harry, I go talk to Ginny.
Helen: That little girl who has a crush on your boyfriend?
Hermione: HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!
Hermione runs upstairs and slams the door to her room. From the downstairs guest room, the Krums are emerging, Mr. Krum and Viktor in jackets and ties, and Mrs. Krum in a nice party dress. Mr. and Mrs. Granger are dressed similarly. Viktor looks in the direction of Hermione's room.
Viktor: I vill talk to her.
CONVERSATION BETWEEN HERMIONE GRANGER AND VIKTOR KRUM
VK: Hermione?
HG: Well done. You finally got my name right.
VK: You know, the vun thing about being vell-known I don't get used to is being made fun off.
HG: Sorry, Viktor. Mum and Dad just made me so...ugh. It's so unfair.
VK: You know, you could still get the job.
HG: But Mom and Dad won't sign it.
VK: I could.
HG: Viktor!
VK: Quiet! I've seen your parents' signatures. It vouldn't be hard at all to imitate their handwriting. And you really vant this.
HG: You're the best friend in the world.
VK: On vun condition.
HG: What? If you ask me to sleep with you, I'll hex you into next April.
VK: I'd never ask you that! No. I just vant a kiss.
HG: I don't know...
VK: Just vun. Kiss me and you can have this job.
HG: Er...
EXCERPT FROM HERMIONE GRANGER'S DIARY
7/7/96
I feel so terribly guilty. I disobeyed my parents and had Viktor help me with it, too. And I kissed him so he would do it. It's almost prostitution! Oh, now I feel really bad.
And the worst part is, it was a wonderful kiss.