"Dear sir or madam will you read my book? It took me years to write will you take a look? It's based on the novel by a man named Lear, And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer! It's a dirty story, about a dirty man, And his gleaming wife doesn't understand, The son is working for The Daily Mail, It's a steady job but he wants to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer!"

Joan stopped singing and pulled her head out of her manga. Lily stood in front of her panting with messy hair and odd socks on.

"Morning!" Joan cried cheerfully taking the earphones out of her ears before putting her diskman and The Beatles back in her school bag.

"Morning," Lily said still puffing and flopped herself down on the bench beside her friend. "Sorry I'm late."

"That's usually my line," Joan said with a chuckle and took her glasses off. "Did you have a good sleep in?"

"Not really," Lily said, her puffing starting to slow. "I only got about four hours sleep last night, or this morning, or, whatever."

"Up late doing yesterday's maths exercises?" Joan asked casually, holding her glasses up in the sunlight to inspect how clean they were.

"What maths exercises? You didn't tell me any maths exercises when I rang yesterday!"

"Yea I did," Joan said calmly putting her glasses back on.

"No you bloody well did not!"

Joan scrunched up her face as she tried to think back a whole 24 hours.

"Oh I know now!" she said suddenly, her face brightening up with a smile. "I must have kept talking after I hung up the phone yesterday. Sorry, I do that sometimes."

Lily grabbed her by the front of her school dress and shook her violently. "How could you do this to me? You, my best friend! I'm totally screwed now! Yamagata sensei is a frigging nightmare! He'll put me through some kind of painful torture for not doing the work!"

"Stress less," Joan said waving her hand up and down, her grin never faltering. "It's true that Yamagata sensei is an advocate of the devil, but you got Da Queen on your side! Leave it to me!"

Lily found the words "Leave it to me," about as reassuring as Shuichi's "I'll get the song done on time." Neither could be truly believed.

With a sigh Lily let go of Joan and the two got up, it was time for their routine walk to school.

"So moving on to the lighter side of the news, how's my Shuichi?" Joan's eyes became love hearts at the words "my Shuichi".

"He is not yours," Lily said with a frown, "and need I add, he never will be. But now that you mention it, he was acting really weird yesterday."

"Weirder than usual?" Joan asked looking surprised.

"Yea. Every time he looked at me he just burst into tears and hugged Nakano san. He must be drinking a hell of a lot of red cordial."

************************************************

Shuichi put his mobile back in his pocket and opened up the brochure for the hundredth time that hour. The lady on the Drug Help Line had given him heaps of advice, but this was only after he had convinced her that the one on drugs wasn't himself. Not that he could really blame her, he had been in a hysterical state when he'd rung.

He had asked for help from the other band members, but his idea had been widely rejected.

"It's not good to get involved with other people's matters Shindo kun," Sakano had said rubbing his hands nervously and hoping Tohma wasn't in earshot. "You never know what will happen."

"I extremely doubt that Lily is taking drugs," Hiro said in a matter of fact tone when Sakano's reasoning failed. "She's not that kind of a kid, she's too smart."

"What else could it be Hiro?" Shuichi whined.

"Well I don't know," he admitted after a second. "But Sakano san is right, it's not good to interfere with other people's business."

The lady at the call centre however had been much more helpful. She had suggested that he had a quiet chat with Lily, and if he failed to stop her addiction, to inform her parents and take her to the nearest psychology centre.

"Pika Pika Shuichi!!!!"

Shuichi shot out of his seat and hit the roof. His head disappeared though the plaster for a few minutes, and after some kicking and wiggling, he fell back down, landing in his seat.

"Ah, Shuichi is so cool!" Ryuichi squealed with an expression of radiant joy. "Kumagoro was so happy to see something so amazing!" He then had the rabbit's paws do a clapping motion.

Shuichi rubbed his aching head with bits of plaster flaking out of his hair. Maybe Yuki was right and he should book himself in for a CAT scan, he did hit his head a lot.

"Oh hello Sakuma san," he said brightly as the toy continued to applaud.

Shuichi had seen Ryuichi thousands of times in his life. On the posters that had covered his bedroom walls as a kid, on all his Nittle Grasper videos, countless times on the television and nearly every second day since he had become a professional. But for the first time ever Shuichi looked at the rock legend from a different angle.

It seemed that the hair was really the only big common trait that the two shared. They both had blue eyes, but Lily's were far darker than her father's. The two also had different face shapes, Lily had higher cheekbones than Ryuichi and even though Shuichi had never seen Lily's mother, it was easy to see that it was her she took after.

"Do I have something on my face?" Ryuichi asked curiously and prodded himself in the cheek with his ringed finger.

"No, no!" Shuichi said quickly waving his hands. "I was just thinking that you don't look much like Lily chan."

Shuichi slapped himself on the forehead, astounded that he'd let that slip. K had told him not to bring the subject of Ryuichi up in front of Lily, so he assumed that vice versa went while around Ryuichi. He could already feel the bullet in his skin.

"I guess not na no da," Ryuichi said casually scratching his head. "She always did remind me more of Christina."

"Christina?" Shuichi asked remembering what K had told him too late.

"Yea!" Ryuichi said, his face lighting up like someone had flicked a switch. "She was my wife-well sort of anyway."

Now Shuichi was completely lost (not that's it was hard to do). He had assumed that since Ryuichi had never spoken about his daughter or his deceased partner, the topic was off limits. However, much to his surprise, Ryuichi seemed overjoyed that he was asking questions.

Ryuichi jumped into the seat next to Shuichi and sat Kumagoro up on the table, the weight of the rabbit's head making it droop like a dying flower.

"She had long blonde hair, dark blue eyes and was this tall," Ryuichi raised his hand to indicate the woman's height, "and was pretty and really, really nice!" He then stuck his face uncomfortably close to Shuichi's. "Do you wanna see a picture?"

Still dumbfounded, Shuichi nodded and lent back on his chair. Ryuichi reached into his black denim jacket and pulled out a photograph. Making sure not to get any fingerprints on it, he placed the picture carefully on the table.

Shuichi was reminded of his teenage years just by looking at it. Ryuichi looked just as he did in the photograph as he had on all of his late eighty's posters and early albums. His hair was just as long and the same smile of delight was plastered on his face. The only differences were that he was a tad thinner and he had a few less earrings. Also, although it wasn't something that you would take a lot of notice of, there was something about the eyes that struck Shuichi. In the photo they seemed brighter somehow, like Ryuichi didn't have a care in the world.

In the photo Ryuichi was standing on a beach proudly flashing the Victory symbol with his fingers. On his back he was carrying a young woman with blonde hair that reached her hips, sapphire eyes with a smile to match her lover's.

'Lily,' he thought as he looked at the aged photograph. It was a little yellow around the sides and a bit of the colour had faded, but there wasn't a tear or crease to be seen. Shuichi then thought of something.

"Sakuma san?"

"Yes?"

"How old where you when this photo was taken?"

Ryuichi held up one hand and counted back on his fingers, muttering to himself. After what seemed like an age, he spoke.

"Eighteen."

It was like Shuichi had been struck by lightning. He leapt up out of his seat and recoiled in horror, his expression full of amazement.

"Eight-eighteen!" he squeaked with his trembling fingers in his mouth.

Ryuichi watched with great curiosity as the twenty-year-old had a panic spasm on the floor with his head tilted to one side. It was like watching a bug that had fallen on its back with its legs waving around in the air.

Like a small child his short attention span gave out after a few minutes so he carefully picked the photo up and slipped it back into his jacket. He never went anywhere without it.

He was about to leave when Shuichi finished. "Sakuma san!"

"Mm?"

"Does that mean you had Lily chan at eighteen?"

"No, no, don't be silly Shuichi," Ryuichi said scooping Kumagoro into his arms and standing up.

Shuichi relaxed with a great sigh of relief. Knowing that Ryuichi had found his one and only at eighteen was electrifying enough, but to have heard that he'd been a young father would have had terrible result on the young singer. After all, it's not everyday you hear amazing things about someone you thought you knew everything about.

"Lily was born two months after my nineteenth birthday."

"Nine-nine-nin-teeeeeen." Shuichi's world spun and he passed out.

"Oh looky, looky Kumagoro, that's what I did when Christina said she had a baby inside her!"

***********************************************

"I love you," Lily said for what must have been the tenth time that afternoon.

"I'm quite fond of you too," Joan said simply and took another swing of orange Fanta.

There was an hour to go before the school day finished and the junior high maths class was breaking just about every rule in the book. Due to the unforseen absence of Yamagata sensei, the double had been christened as free study time with the vice-principal making random visits every now and again. And if you can think of what things were like for you at school, you'd remember what "free study period" translates to. Bludge!

The students had put their desks together to form large tables so that gossip rings could sit around. Some boys smoking in the back corner were huddled around a roulette wheel made from an old car tyre and a group of girls were dancing while a CD played.

"Not that I really care, but what happened to Yamagata sensei?" Lily asked nibbling on a banana-choc pocky stick.

"Oh he suddenly decided to take a time out after I had a bit of a look at his e-mails and found something that nobody else knows about," Joan replied with a wink.

"You mean you hacked into his e-mail account and found something to blackmail him with?"

"Well if you're going to go and make it sound illegal," Joan said rolling her eyes behind her huge frames. "Anyway, I found some rather raunchy e- mails from the principal's wife."

"You what!?" the pocky stick fell from Lily's mouth and she paled at the thought of the principal's wife and Yamagata sensei together.

"Stop interrupting," Joan said in an annoyed tone and Lily kept quiet. "So after I found that rather damning evidence, I got ready to forward it, found Yamagata sensei and told him that if he didn't want every member of the student body to know about how he'd been a naughty little boy, he should consider taking the afternoon off. Ergo, you now have time to do those math exercises. Who da Queen?"

"You da Queen!" Lily cried beaming and slapped hands with Joan.

The two exchange students had pushed their desks together and were making their way though a large selection of artery clogging food. Chips, pocky, jelly lollies, a slab of orange Fanta and a box of chocolates, all from Joan's secret stash in her locker. They each had one earphone in and the Beetles played on Joan's discman.

Times like this reminded Lily why she bothered.

"She's coming!" one of the roulette boys cried.

There was a flurry as desks were rearranged, foods jammed back into school bags, cigarettes butted out, the roulette wheel and CD player were stuffed in a vacant locker and random papers and books were put out on desks.

Nothing but silence could be heard as the vice-principal walked past the classroom, peering in through the windows. Every student lifted their heads in perfect sync and flashed dazzling grins at her. She smiled back and everyone kept up the working act until the sound of her high heels had disappeared.

Out came the roulette wheel and CD player, tables and chairs scraped across the floor as they were once again moved and people started to munch on their sweets again.

Joan pushed the open button on her discman and took out her Beatles CD.

"Time for something a bit different," she said and flicked through her CD case.

"Hey Ringo and Paul are the only two Beatles still alive aren't they?" Lily asked as she opened another can of Fanta.

"No, Paul's been dead for years," Joan said with a shrug and selected a CD.

Lily frowned with thought for a few seconds, then lowered her drink. "Wait a second, no, Paul is still alive! It was in a magazine a few weeks ago about how he's having another kid with his second wife."

"That's the fake Paul, the real Paul died in a car crash back in the sixties," Joan said promptly.

"What are you talking about?"

"Well when he died in the car crash, the other three Beatles had a Paul look-alike competition and they had the winner act as Paul until the band broke up. I read it on the Internet." Joan lent back in her chair with her arms folded and gave her friend a superior smile.

Lily looked at her for a very long time. The half drunk Fanta bubbled in her hand, in the corner someone lost 1000 yen and the rain pelting on the windows grew heavier.

"That has to be the stupidest thing that I have ever heard."

"What? You think it was one big lie?" Joan asked looking shocked.

"Yes, yes I do indeed," Lily said with a sigh and drank some more Fanta.

"Oh well, silly me," Joan laughed not looking the least bit embarrassed and put a CD in the discman.

"What are you putting on?" Lily asked.

"The Nittle Grasper album my brother gave to me when he moved back to England. It's one of their early ones, but it still kicks arse," Joan said closing the lid.

"Nittle Grasper?" Lily thought for a minute before a memory rekindled in her mind. "Oh yea! Shuichi really likes them."

"Really?" Joan scrunched up her nose and thought. "According to the charts, their Bad Luck's biggest rival." She hit the Play button.

"This first song is the one that got them their big break and made music history. It's called Sleepless Beauty."

The music started.

************************************************

The leather chair creaked as Tohma lent back in it heavily. Despite what Lily said, he really did feel old.

He'd just finished an on-line meeting with the London and American N-G offices, and the news hadn't been so great. He'd left the London office to handle things for themselves a few months back, but it was clear now that they had really screwed themselves sideways.

Also, he had promised Mika to go on vacation in Europe with her months ago, and he'd only remembered that morning when the airline had called to confirm their booking for Friday.

And just to add some more stress to his life, Eiri hadn't replied to any of his messages all week. That man was so stubborn.

Tohma sighed and threw his hat on the desk so he could run his hand through his hair. Now he had to choose between a business collapse and an angry wife. His business instinct told him to fix N-G in England. His will to live told him to pick a week in Europe.

That's when it clicked.

He could extend the vacation by a week and make a stopover in England. He could set London N-G back on track while Mika went shopping or sightseeing. He'd heard that London had a torture chamber museum and that sounded right up her ally.

Astonished by this own brilliance he was about to call the airline back when he remembered.

Lily.

Tohma sagged back down and thought for a minute. Who could he get to babysit for two weeks? Noriko was off visiting her sister in Aomori for a week, and Ryuichi.well that just wasn't possible yet.

Then he thought of something. Who was that weirdo friend that ran Lily non- stop on her mobile to ask stupid things like where her left shoe was? Jan? Jenny? Jill? Jess? Joan?

Yes, that was right, it was Joan. Lily could arrange to stay with her for two weeks. After all, Lily was used to looking after herself.

************************************************ "La li ho! Lily! Lily! Lily! Hey Lily chan over here!"

Lily lifted her heavy head the table and looked up. Shuichi was waving at her from the end of the hall with Hiro, heading over to the tables she was sitting at.

"Oh hey," she croaked, her face worn with dark bags under her eyes.

"I missed you yesterday," Shuichi pouted. "Where were you?"

"Oh I just had something on my mind, and I was tired," she explained. She hoped that they wouldn't ask about the first bit of that answer.

"You look terrible," Hiro slipped out before he could think of anything more eloquent.

"It's the drugs I'm telling you!" Shuichi hissed, his hand raised to hide his moving lips. Hiro rolled his eyes but didn't say anything. There was no point trying to convince his friend otherwise, he would just have to suffer the burn of embarrassment.

"Well that's pretty much how I feel," Lily sighed running her hand through her thick brown hair.

"Are you waiting for Seguchi san?" the guitarist asked before Shuichi could say something stupid about cannabis or needles.

"No, no," she said waving her hand to dismiss the question. "He and Mika san have gone to Europe for two weeks. Joan said she'd pick me up from here after her anime club meeting."

"Well we were just about to go and grab something to eat since we've finished for the day," Shuichi said slowly, as a plan formed in his mind.

"We were?" Hiro asked looking a bit dazzled but didn't say anything else after an elbow in the ribs.

Shuichi's master plan was that maybe he could confront Lily about her drug addiction if he wasn't in the same building as his trigger-happy manager. "Why don't you come and have a bite to eat before Joan gets here?"

Lily had no appetite whatsoever, but the idea of going to a café with Heart Throb Hiro got her to her feet and out the door. She followed the two musicians through the rain to a small café a few blocks away at a very slow pace. Her body ached way more than it should for doing such a menial task.

Shuichi pushed the glass door open when Greensleeves started to shriek loudly from Lily's pocket.

"Sorry," she said pushing her hand into her pocket. "Go ahead and I'll be along in a minute."

She flicked the top open and the door closed. The Hiragana on the phone screen read "Joan."

"Hey what's up?" Lily asked listlessly as she held the small machine to her ear.

"So sorry," Joan panted on the other end of the line. "Grandma took a fall so we all need to go see her."

"Where does she live?" Lily asked feeling a bit worried. She knew for a fact that a fall for a fossil could be rather serious.

"Manchester," Joan said in great haste. "Our plane leaves in five, so sorry, I don't mean to diss you but we can't baby sit. Love to stay and chat but I gotta go. See ya!"

The phone went dead in Lily's hand and she slowly moved it away from her ear. It looked like she'd be at Tohma's place all alone for two weeks.

'Oh well, it's not like the feeling is unfamiliar.'

She pushed the door open and walked over to were her seniors were sitting. She slipped into the booth across from the two friends and tried to focus her mind on other things. It wasn't Joan's fault that she had to go to England, but still, she couldn't help but feel upset.

"Everything ok?" Hiro asked cheerfully.

It could have been what he said, or it could have been how he said it. Perhaps it was his expression of bliss that did it. But whatever it was, it did it.

Lily's fingers clutched the blue denim on her legs and her fringe fell over her face as she stared down at her feet. A burning sensation played on her vocal cords and her nose began to run. Neither of them clicked to what was happening until the first tear slid down her face and tumbled through the air, landing with a splash on her clenched hand.

"Lily chan is something wrong?" Shuichi asked as he lent back into the vinyl booth with surprise.

"Have you ever, you ever, felt as though," she couldn't finish the sentence but her voice broke into a sob and more tears formed a cascade of helplessness.

"I'm sorry, I just," she tried to talk but she couldn't think of what to say as she tried to wipe the tears from her face. Shuichi got up from beside Hiro hastily and sat himself next to her.

"Lily chan," he murmured and pulled her into a hug, resting his cheek on her hair.

Lily didn't know what to do. Sure, Shuichi had hugged her before, but that had just been to burn off energy. The sympathy and comfort he was giving her by the embrace was something different. Something that she'd never been given by anyone, ever.

"It'll be all right Lily chan. It's all going to be ok," Shuichi said soothingly as he rubbed her back.

"No, no it wont," she sobbed into his jacket. "I try, and I try, but I can't remember. I don't remember anything!"

She continued to soak Shuichi with salty tears as he held her. He threw Hiro a questioning look, but all Hiro could do was shrug.

"It must really hurt," Shuichi assumed, for he had never felt the pain of not knowing who you are.

"The only things that I can remember are just so ah!" her voice broke up into a gasp of pain and she pushed away from Shuichi's warmth and comfort.

High pitched gasps brought the attention of the other people dining. Lily tried to breathe in but the oxygen particles didn't make it into her lungs so it all came back out as loud wheezes.

"Lily chan what's wrong?" Shuichi asked fearfully as he held her shoulders.

"I-need-my-puff-puffer!" she gasped and started to cough violently.

Things flew around in Shuichi's head at one hundred miles an hour. It was clear that Lily was in some kind of pain, but he couldn't think of how to help her. He was reminded when he found her outside N-G in the rain, but that didn't help any. It was Seguchi who had known what to do, not him. And what the Hell was a puffer?

"My-bag!" she gasped waving frantically at the backpack on the floor, her wheezing getting louder.

A wheel moved in Hiro's mind and he grabbed the backpack, scourging through it like a rodent. He opened every zip with things falling out constantly until he found it in the front pocket.

He thrust the Ventolin into her hands and she wasted not time pushing the top and breathing in the medicine.

Bit by bit, the noise coming from her quietened and she slowly started to get back into a regular rhythm of breathing. She held the blue object in her hand and let her head fall on Shuichi's shoulder.

"I'm all right now," she whispered as she breathed deeply. "I just have to rest for a minute.

Relief washed over the two adults and for the first time ever, Hiro was glad that his parents had made him study to become a doctor back in High School. Glancing around, he noticed that the diner had come to a standstill due to their little display.

Noticing that they'd been sprung, the curious onlookers turned away and went back about their business.

"I think we should personally escort you to Joan's place," Hiro said as he turned back to his friends. "We don't want you to have another attack when you're alone."

Shuichi stopped brushing the brown hair from her sweaty face and looked at Hiro with confusion.

"Attack? What kind of attack?"

"An asthma attack," he explained brushing some reddish hair back over his shoulder. "It's a disease in the lungs that causes problems for the breathing of the patient."

All Hiro needed was a white coat and a clipboard and he could con anyone into believing that he had a three year medical degree.

"That's right," Lily said, sitting back up again slowly with a wince. "It's been keeping me up coughing all night lately."

Shuichi felt really, really stupid. Lily wasn't taking drugs, she had a lung disease. Why was it that Hiro was always right?

"Anyway, Joan had to go to Manchester, so I have to go back to Tohma's," Lily said and took a sip of water from Shuichi's glass, taking care to drink slowly.

"What, so you mean you're going to be alone in the house for two weeks?" Shuichi asked, looking quite alarmed.

"Don't worry," Lily said forcing a weak smile. "I'm all alone anyway."

************************************************

"You've either got nerves of steel or just no brains," Hiro sighed as the three stood outside the diner, the heavy rain clouds covering the stars like a dark blanket.

"Well we don't really have much choice in the matter do we?" Shuichi said with a smile and a shrug. He then turned to Lily with a smile and crouched down. "Come on Lily chan, hop on."

"What?" she asked coming out of a daze. Her face was all warm and red from crying and the asthma attack had sucked her dry of energy.

Hiro walked up behind her, and placing his hands under her arms, lifted her up and propped her on Shuichi's back.

"Hey I can still walk you know!" is said indigently as Shuichi straightened up and held onto her tightly.

"Don't worry Lily chan," Shuichi said in a sugar sweet voice. "You're very tired so I'll do all the walking for you. Besides, you're as light as a feather."

A pink tinge formed above her nose and she linked her hands around his neck for extra support.

"You'd best get her indoors quickly," Hiro muttered to Shuichi. "By the look of her she could really do with a hot bath and a sleep."

"Don't worry, I'll take good care of her!" Shuichi proclaimed brightly.

"I actually think it's going to be a case of vice versa," Hiro said with a sigh and put his hands on his hips. "But that's not what I'm really worried about, if you catch my drift."

"Don't worry Hiro!" Shuichi cried cheerfully, amused by his friend's concern. "I'm sure that Yuki loves kids, and me!"

************************************************ Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation or any of the characters. Credit to Maki Murakami. The song "Paperback Writer" was written by the Beatles, all right reserved. Cheers for all the reviews guys!