Chapter 10:
Illusion
"Pain makes man think.
Thought makes men wise.
Wisdom makes life endurable."
~John Patrick
Elena was standing in the middle of a wide field. The sun was shining down on her, and without any shade she was unbearably hot. She looked quickly around for the others, but saw no one. Saw nothing but tall grass blowing in the wind.
How did I get here? She wondered. I don't remember leaving the others. I don't even remember leaving the airship.
The first inkling of fear trickled into her mind. She pushed it aside.
Well, standing here in the middle of nowhere isn't helping me any, she told herself. I may as well find a place to get my bearings.
Upon reaching this decision, she started walking. But even as she did, the grass around her, already up to her waist, seemed to grow higher and higher, towering over her head. Elena gave a short cry of real terror and began to run, pushing the tall grass aside, hardly seeing where she was going, only knowing she must flee.
Inevitably, she tripped and fell face forward on the ground. She lay there a moment, her breath coming in short gasps as she fought back tears. Crying would do her no good, she knew, but she couldn't ever remember being this frightened.
"Elena!"
Someone helped her to her feet. She looked quickly around. The grass was normal grass again, maybe two inches tall, the way grass ought to be.
"Elena. You okay?" Rude. He was the one who'd helped her up. Now he peered into her face, his own lined with concern.
"Rude!" She clutched at him in relief. "Where are we?"
"I don't know." He looked around. "But I don't like it."
"Hey! Aren't you gonna ask about me?"
The speaker was Reno, trotting toward them. His carefree tone wasn't very successful at hiding the fear in his voice.
Elena turned back to Rude, feeling much better now that that her friends were here. "Oh yeah. And where's the Turk mascot?"
"I resent that." Reno had caught up to them, but he wasn't smiling anymore. He glared at her angrily. "At least I'm not some bitch playing at being a man."
"Really, Reno!" She glared back at him. "That wasn't funny. Sometimes you take a joke too far."
"Who said I was joking?" There was another quality in the red-head's voice now, an added tone of cruelty honed to a deadly edge. "Pathetic little wannabe."
"Reno!" Elena cried, stung by his words. "Knock it off. You know I've proved myself many times."
"Oh yeah? How?" His voice turned mocking. "By wielding your feminine charms?"
"Shut up!" Blood rushed to Elena's furious face. "How dare you!"
"How dare you call yourself a Turk?" Rude demanded. Elena turned to him in astonishment, but he went on. "We're always having to cover for you. Why'd you take the job anyway? Because no man would ever want you?"
"Rude…" To hear her kind friend talk in that way hurt terribly. She hardened her voice. "I took the job because I knew I could handle it. I'm good with a gun, I'm smart, strong-"
"If you're so strong, how come I can do this?" Rude grabbed both her arms roughly and hooked his leg round hers, spilling her to the grass. It was a simple maneuver, but she was too shocked to even think of resisting. A sharp rock jutted out from the ground, and she scraped her arm on it. But she hardly felt the pain. All her mind registered was complete and total surprise.
Reno stood over her, arms crossed. "I think we should teach her a lesson."
"Yeah," Rude agreed. "Filthy wannabe." He kicked her with his boot.
It was then the tears started. What was happening? These were her best friends, the two people she loved most in the world. No. This wasn't real. This couldn't be real!
"Oh, look, the baby's bawling," Reno said in disgust. "Be right back." He disappeared from sight.
Because she was lying on her back, the tears slid backwards into her ears, making it hard to hear. Not that she needed to hear anything. Rude stood silently above her, his face cold and impassive.
She couldn't move, couldn't even speak. If she made the slightest move to get up, Rude pushed her down with his foot, growling a curse. There she waited until Reno returned.
In his arms he was holding a huge red and black striped snake.
"…Reno?" What was he doing? He knew she hated slimy things, especially snakes. He knew! "Reno!"
He grinned wickedly and dropped the snake. "Let's see how much of a Turk you really are."
And then the snake was slithering all over her body, wrapping its cold, wet self around her. She fought desperately, but Rude gave her a look that froze her in place. She opened her mouth, either to plead or wail in despair, and the snake slithered down into her throat. It was so huge that it could only go about halfway down.
Elena screamed.
Reno started laughing, softly at first, then harder and harder. After a moment, Rude joined in. The laughter rose in volume as Elena's scream did the same, until all she could hear was a loud ringing in her ears, drowning out any other sound. The snake was choking her, wiggling still deeper down her throat. She would have vomited in disgust had not the snake been in the way.
But all that seemed like nothing in comparison to her horror about her two friends. That one thought kept running through her head: This isn't real. This isn't happening!
Then all at once she realized the snake wasn't alive at all; it was dead! It was dead, but something was still sliming down her throat, something wet and cold…then she understood and nearly fainted. The dead snake's innards were slicking down inside of her, perhaps through its eyes and wide-open mouth…
This doesn't make any sense! She screamed inwardly. It isn't real! It isn't real!
Reno crouched over her, grinning crookedly. She had seen him use that same grin on people he intended to kill. Her blood ran cold.
"Well, Elena? How do you like being a full-fledged Turk?" He leaned close. "Isn't it everything you've always wanted? Everything you've always dreamed of?"
This can't be real. I won't let it be real!
Something clicked inside of Elena's brain. Maybe it was the deathly cold look in Reno's eyes, maybe it was the sight of Rude with an amused smile on his usually placid face, maybe it was the strangeness of the whole situation. Maybe it was the core of strength deep inside of her, the core that would, never, ever admit defeat. Whatever it was, it saved her soul.
"Once Jenova has found a way to penetrate your mind, she will then have power over your inner self." The Ancient had been right. The damned Jenova was looking for a weakness. Well, Elena wouldn't let her find one.
With a shrill cry of rage, she ripped the snake from her mouth. Acting quickly, she grabbed Reno's leg and pulled him down. He toppled over, completely surprised. Elena used his leverage to get to her feet in time to dodge Rude's flying fist. She grasped that outstretched arm and leaned on it while slamming the heel of her foot into his middle. Rude doubled over, gasping.
She felt someone behind her grab her hair, raking his fingers through her scalp. Reno.
With a cool detachment that surprised her, especially when she was in this much pain, Elena bent over a little and reached behind herself. Once she managed to get a firm hold on the Turk, she used his own weight to throw him over her shoulder, getting half her hair torn out as he was forced to release his grip. Before he could get up, she kicked him once in the shin and once in the chest. Then she leaned over him and said in a chilling whisper:
"You won't beat me this way."
Reno's eyes narrowed as he started to say something, but first she calmly broke his nose with an expert twist of her hand.
Rude, who had gotten to his feet, was quick, but not quick enough. She launched a roundhouse kick, catching him in the side of the jaw, making him stumble back. While he was trying to recover, she punched him hard in the face, creating a large crack in his dark sunglasses…
"Elena! Wake up!"
She bolted upright. The snake! Was it still in her mouth? She swallowed. No. A dream. That was all.
"Elena!"
Reno was giving her the once-over. "What the hell happened? Why were you screaming like that?"
The two of them, along with Rude, Barret and Vincent, were sitting in the airship's common room to pass the time. Yuffie had been with them until a short time ago, when she had been struck by a bout of airsickness and had to rush up to fresh air. Afterward, Reno began cracking mean jokes that he would have thought twice about making, had Yuffie been there. Thus, it was only natural Elena had fallen asleep.
She looked around for the others. She was still on the battered old couch that sagged under even her weight. Barret had tried to sit in it, but the thing had nearly collapsed. He now sat in a more stable chair. Vincent leaned against the far wall. Reno, who was supposed to be on the other side of the room, sitting at the bar with Rude, had made his way over to the couch to scream in her ear to "wake up".
Now Elena stared at him as though she'd never seen him before. Just seconds ago, in her mind, he'd betrayed her in the worst way possible: By taking advantage of her trust.
"Reno," she said very slowly, knowing this would sound odd, "what would you do if you had a snake?"
He used that same crooked grin on her. "I'd wrap a bow around it and say, 'Happy birthday, Elena!' I know how much you love snakes!"
It was the wrong answer. Elena promptly burst into tears, crying hysterically. Reno caught her in his arms, looking thoroughly startled.
Was it something I said? He mouthed at Rude. The bald man hurried over to help.
"Elena, calm down. What's the matter?"
She made an effort to strop crying, wrenching herself from Reno's grasp. Vincent and Barret were watching curiously.
"I'm fine," she gulped, wiping the tears still streaming from her eyes. "It's just…" She paused, looking at the two of them. Reno's usually easy-going façade had dropped, just for now, to reveal true concern. Rude, ever-loyal Rude, putting an arm around her shoulders to steady her.
They would never turn on her. Not Rude, who had once beat up a man for making a crude joke at her expense, nor Reno, who covered for her when she was late for work. Looking at them, she just knew they would be friends forever.
She started to cry again. "It's just that you guys are so great to me…"
"Figures," Reno scoffed, though relief was evident in his voice. "That time of month again."
Normally she would have slapped him, but now only smiled. Just then, Yuffie, who had returned, spoke.
"You know what," she said solemnly, "I always thought the day I'd see a tearful Elena being comforted by Reno and Rude would be the day I saw Cid kiss Shera…and would ya believe it, they both happen at the same time!"
There was silence for a moment while this statement was pieced together. Then, everyone was on their feet.
"Now I gotta see this to believe it!" was Reno's exclamation as they all raced to the deck.
* * * * * *
"So, Elena." Cid turned his dark blue eyes on her. "You're saying you think your dream was one of Jenova's illusions?"
"Yes." Elena looked down at the table. They were all, once again, gathered in the Operation Room, sitting around the meeting table. Barret held Marlene in his lap, and Adine, who had taken a shine to Rude, was now in the Turk's. The sight of the silent, bald man, dark shades over his eyes and with a gun strapped to his hip, holding a four-year old child on his knee was ludicrous, but Elena didn't laugh. She had just finished telling everyone about her dream, and she didn't want to meet either Rude's or Reno's gaze right then. But of course she had to.
"Elena." Reno's voice sounded strained, and Elena winced as she looked up at him. "Don't you ever remind me I said this, but…I am damn proud of you."
Rude nodded. "You beat Jenova. Just like a true Turk would."
"So now we have a way of fightin' back?" Barret asked. Elena was glad he'd interrupted. She didn't trust herself to say anything without choking on the words.
"Don't fool yourselves." The voice was Vincent's, and as usual, everyone looked at him like he had no right to speak. He ignored the glances and kept talking. "All we have is a defense. We still need to find a way to strike at Jenova itself."
"What defense?" Yuffie burst out. "I don't understand! What did Elena do that stopped Jenova from taking control of her mind?" She was aware she was whining, but didn't care.
"I don't really know what I did," Elena admitted, feeling stupid. "I just…reacted."
"It sounds like maybe all you did was react," Shera suggested. "You overcame your weakness with your strength." She was quiet a moment. "You were stronger than me."
"It wasn't that," Elena protested, feeling embarrassed. "I just couldn't believe those two guys would turn on me like that!" She grinned and waved a hand at Reno and Rude. "She made a mistake, that's all."
No one else smiled. Elena looked at Cid, who was staring, stony-faced. She followed his gaze to the lower half of her raised forearm. It was completely covered with blood. She hadn't even noticed it.
"How did that happen, Elena?" Rude asked quietly, although it was unnecessary. He knew.
Elena swallowed, her throat dry. "It…was when you tripped me and pushed me to the ground," she whispered. "I scraped my arm against a rock."
Nobody spoke, the truth sinking in. These illusions weren't just dreams. They were reality. In these illusions…they could die.
"Some defense," Reno muttered sarcastically.
I actually based the whole snake thing on a nightmare I once had. Now, I don't usually have nightmares, so this one really stuck in my mind. So, I let Elena have it. She handled it a lot better than I did in my dream. (Basically bursting into tears and then waking up) 'Course, I didn't have blood on me when I woke up. Thank God!
~Lila