Chapter 18-

Scattered Emotions

"Have you ever found the one

You've dreamed of all your life

You'd do anything to look into their eyes

Have you finally found the one you've given your heart to

Only to find that one won't give their heart to you

Have you ever closed your eyes and

Dreamed that they were there

And all you can do is wait for that day when they will care…"

~Brandy, Have you Ever?

He ran.

The streets of Junon were said to be the best place to stay, if you had something to hide. The entire upper level, once a Shinra military sector, was now overrun with a thick slew of people- people whose homes had been destroyed, victims of hard times. Therefore, it was an ideal place to lay low.

On the other hand, the lower level, where the simple fishermen used to live, was now a thriving populace. Not as many people lived there, but those who did were honest and trustworthy. The inhabitants of old Junon, free from Shinra oppression, were able to once again go about their daily lives.

That was why he frequented Upper Junon. His face, with its cold, perfect features, was too recognizable there. The face of Rufus Shinra was imprinted in the mind of every citizen of Lower Junon. He was not one they'd soon forget.

Even in Upper Junon there were those who saw him…and knew.

"You! Halt!"

Damned if he would. He ducked into a narrow alley in hopes of throwing off his pursuers. He leaned against the wall for a moment, mentally cursing the ill luck that seemed to follow him wherever he went. He'd even dyed his hair, in an effort to change his appearance! Apparently, the effort was wasted. It was his face that gave him away, that damned, highborn, recognizable face!

His breathing stopped as the voices sounded from just outside his hiding place.

"He's in here. You wait while I flush him out."

Not for the first time, he inwardly regretted his rash actions during the days when he'd held power. Not because he cared about the lives he'd ruined, knowing they were simply in his way. No, he regretted what his own ambition had cost himself. Of course, if he'd known this would happen…

Now! Move!

He jerked with surprise at the sudden voice inside of his head, but before he could really react, the man hunting him was suddenly there, in front of him!

He gave a started yell and thrust out his forearm, catching the man square in the throat. The stranger stumbled back. His quarry took the moment and tore up the alley, his booted feet crunching loudly on the gravel.

He didn't take the time to look behind, he could hear the man's footsteps running after him. If he could just get out of the alley and into open space, he might have a chance of escape-

A high wire fence blocked his path. Frantically he shook it, but the wire did nothing but rattle and sway disarmingly. He was trapped.

He turned slowly as his pursuer closed in on him. The predator saw no need to run now; his prey was cornered and absolutely helpless.

Helpless.

The "prey's" eyes narrowed in cold hatred. I will not die like this, he assured the man silently. Whatever it costs me, I refuse to be hunted down like an animal!

A low, silky laugh erupted from inside of his mind. Are you sure about that, Rufus Shinra?

He looked around for the source of the voice, ignoring the man. "Who are you?" he demanded.

Why don't you find out? was the reply.

Rufus looked for a moment at the man in front of him. His eyes were wide and staring, and he seemed petrified by a kind of fear. Still, the gun that hung limply at his side was very capable of killing him.

Rufus noted all this, smiled as he always did when he dared Death, and closed his eyes.

The woman in the purple gown smiled back at him, looking pleased. Her beauty was captivating, timeless, and Rufus knew at once who she must be.

"Yes, I am what you call Jenova," she said, reading his thoughts. "This, of course, is not my true form. It is my appearance when I decide to show myself as human. I thought we could negotiate better this way."

He noted the word "negotiate", but instead asked, "Weren't you destroyed by AVALANCHE?"

"My power and, indeed, most of my physical form was exterminated," she said, rather wistfully. Rufus was impressed by her ability to show human emotion so convincingly, however, this only served to warn him how dangerous this woman- creature- was.

She went on. "But dear Professor Hojo managed to salvage a part of me…my essence, if you will." She gave an icy smile. "I owe so much to that man. What a pity he's dead."

"So Hojo saved you." This, then, had worked. Rufus had thought his scientist was grasping at straws when Hojo had somehow obtained the head of Jenova and preserved it, insisting it was still useful. Well, at least the man had accomplished something before his death.

"No," she said, shaking her head so that her black, unnaturally straight hair shimmered and rippled, like waves on a lake. "He restored my sentience, not my power. That is why I need your help."

"I see." Rufus allowed himself the smallest hint of a smile. "And what, may I ask, will I be granted in return?"

She smirked, her purple eyes gleaming brightly. "Myself- and all the power I possess."

Rufus considered, then inclined his head in assent. Here it was. His chance. "Very well. However, I happen to be in a dilemma at the moment…" He knew, as soon as he returned to reality, the man would kill him. And there was no point in making a bargain if you were dead the next minute.

"All will be taken care of. Just one thing." The dropped of her face, to be replaced by a very severe look. "Be sure you do not fail me."

Rufus opened his eyes and tensed, expecting a shot. A moment passed, until his mind registered what was in front of him.

The man lay sprawled on the ground, arms and legs flopped in odd positions, gun abandoned at his side. He didn't even have to look to know the other waiting outside the alley was dead, too.

He smiled, then felt something cold in his hand. He held it up to his face to find he held a dark red pendant, secured on a simple metal chain. The pendant was heavy, round made of some kind of stone-like material. A thin band of gold encircled it and illegible runes were scratched out in its surface.

This amulet will hide your identity as long as you wear it. It will not help you win friends, but it may help you avoid enemies.

He bowed his head and slipped the chain over his neck. The chain felt normal, but the pendant tingled against his skin, even through his clothes.

"All right," he said aloud, spreading his hands in a gesture of supplication. "What must I do?"

* * * * * *

"Sufur!"

He woke with a start, turning to his assailant with a knife in his hand. It took him a moment to realize his "assailant" was Tifa.

Tifa had frozen when the knife was pulled on her. Only when she saw recognition dawn in Sufur's eyes and he had lowered the weapon did she remember to exhale.

"You can relax," she told him, although her voice trembled a little. "I wasn't going to slit your throat or anything. Cloud told me to wake everybody up, that's all. We have to get going."

Across the tent, Zack moaned and rolled over. "No need to come over here, Teef. Our new pal's paranoia is better than a splash of cold water in the face."

"Sorry," Sufur shrugged, replacing the knife in his boot. "I've lived on the streets for some time. Reflex."

Zack sat up and blinked sleepily. "That, and you're not a morning person."

"If you're awake enough to crack jokes, you're awake enough to help take down the tent," Tifa informed him. "You've had plenty of time to laze around in bed."

Zack squinted at her in disbelief. "Tifa, it's the crack of dawn!"

She pretended not to hear and swept out of the tent. They had been making good time for the past day and a half. After leaving Kalm yesterday, Cloud had pressed them on without rest, until it grew dark and it was necessary to stop and make camp for the night.

Something was definitely bothering him. Tifa glanced at him worriedly as he worked mechanically, taking down tent poles. He looked more drawn and haggard with each passing day, and nothing she did seemed to help. In fact, her efforts seemed to make things worse. Last night he had even snapped at her.

Will you stop hovering over me? Just leave me alone for five minutes!

Hurt, she had fallen silent for several minutes. He'd apologized afterward, but the whole incident only served to strengthen her certainty that something was desperately wrong with Cloud.

"We should reach Junon today," Aeris said, coming across the grass to stand beside Tifa. "We'll take the cargo ship from there and probably spend the night in Costa del Sol."

Tifa nodded distractedly, watching Cloud work. Suddenly she turned and looked at Aeris. "How soon till we reach Nibelheim?"

Aeris looked faintly surprised at the abrupt question, then shrugged. "I can't say. Maybe a few days, if we keep at this pace. Why?"

Tifa didn't answer right away. When she did speak, she didn't look at Aeris. "Does Cloud seem…distracted…to you?"

"More than that." Aeris frowned, looking troubled. "It's…as if he's afraid of something."

"Afraid?" It was Tifa's turn to frown. "What do you mean?"

The half-Cetra indicated Cloud with a nod of her head. "He keeps glancing over his shoulder. Not in the sense of speaking, of course," she added when Tifa opened her mouth. "It's just…he looks so haunted. And the way he's pushing us onward…" She let the sentence hang in the air, looking at Tifa helplessly. "I'm sorry. I can't explain it any better than that."

Tifa watched as the entire tent collapsed on an outraged Zack, who had stayed inside and, apparently, gone back to sleep. "I'll just feel a lot better when we meet up with Cid and the others," she murmured, half to herself.

Aeris nodded. "Me, too."

"Why's that?"

Tifa whirled around to see Sufur's disturbingly blue eyes. "How long were you standing there?" she demanded, again feeling that rising sense of unease.

She got the impression that he smiled, even though she couldn't exactly see the expression form on his face. "Why? Were you talking about something I wasn't supposed to hear?"

Tifa remained silent, her mouth fixed in a firm line, her eyes filled with loathing and distrust. Sufur also said nothing, instead simply smirking at her in his arrogant fashion. Aeris looked back and forth between the two. She didn't want to interrupt the silent battle of wills, but didn't want it to go on, either.

Nanaki saved her, padding up so silently no one heard him arrive. "What's going on, here?"

Both Sufur and Tifa jumped; their gazes dropped. Aeris breathed a sigh of relief.

"Tifa? Aeris?" Nanaki was still waiting for an answer. "Is something wrong?"

"No." Even though she was speaking to Nanaki, it was Sufur on which Tifa fixed a cold stare. "No, nothing to worry about. Nothing to worry about at all." So saying, she turned her back on Sufur with contempt and strode off.

Aeris smiled with approval. Her friend's message had been quite clear. Without looking at Sufur, she followed Tifa's example and walked away. Nanaki hesitated a moment, then followed hurriedly.

Sufur looked after them thoughtfully. Then with a snort of derision, he turned away.

No one was around to see the cold smile spread across his face. One hand went to the pendant at his throat and rested there, stroking the red stone with his fingertips. He had a plan, now. One that would end with Jenova getting exactly what she wanted.

The girl was dead wrong. He was definitely "something to worry about".

Too bad she wouldn't live long enough to figure that out.

* * * * * *

Late that afternoon, they arrived in Costa del Sol. Cloud led them to the Shinra Villa. Some time ago, he'd worked up enough gil to buy the huge place, and then never used it.

Sufur outwardly showed no expression, but inside a small part of his mind laughed mockingly. When he'd visited this mansion in the past, he hadn't been able to wait for the day when the whole world would know who he was. Now, he stayed at the villa to hide from prying eyes.

Cloud shoved open the door and unceremoniously dumped a pack of gear on the floor. Nanaki slunk in behind him. Aeris and Tifa arrived next, followed by Sufur. Zack came in last, shutting the door behind him.

"Man, it's cold out there!" he exclaimed, rubbing his hands together to warm them. He spotted Aeris and Tifa and looped an arm through each of theirs. "Good thing I've got two gorgeous babes to warm me up!"

Aeris laughed and went along with it, but Tifa yanked her arm away, blushing a little. She wasn't Aeris. She wasn't flirtatious or cute. Zack shrugged it off.

"Sorry. Forgot- you belong to Cloud."

Tifa was so distracted she failed to notice the note of bitterness in his voice. She fingered the PHS in her hand. "Aeris, did Reno say if they'd reached Nibelheim yet?"

"I don't know." The half-Cetra lowered her eyes thoughtfully. "He didn't say. They might've made it by today, though."

"He didn't say?" Zack repeated. "What did he say? You were on the PHS for quite a while, if I recall."

Aeris pulled her arm free of his grip. "That's not funny, Zack! Cloud told you to stop doing that!"

"No, Cloud told me to stop making fun of him. He did not mention you." Zack grinned. "And you are turning a lovely shade of pink."

She glared at him, then turned and marched into the sitting room, sitting on the small couch primly. Zack rolled his eyes to the ceiling in a long-suffering expression and leaned against the wall beside Cloud.

Tifa punched in the number as she sank down on the couch beside Aeris. Nanaki sat back on his haunches, appraising everyone silently. Sufur was already relaxing in an armchair, taking no note of the proceedings in front of him.

Three…four…Tifa mentally counted the rings as she studied her nails, not looking at the others. Five…six…what's taking them so long?…eight…

On the eleventh ring, someone picked up. There was the sound of scattered cursing, a crash as though he'd dropped the PHS, more curses, and finally: "What!"

Nearly everyone in the room flinched. Aeris hid a smile behind her hand.

"Cid, you did this last night, too," Tifa said patiently. "Don't you remember? The whole, 'let's contact each other at sunset' thing?"

Cid swore right in her ear. "Sorry…" he muttered when he'd calmed. "There's just…a lot goin' on right now."

"Like what?"

He hesitated. "Look, I…don't know how to say this, Tifa. We…ran into some trouble last night. Took a lot outta us. And…Adine. She…"

Tifa was suddenly very aware of how fast her heart was pounding. She could feel her own pulse. "Yes?" she said thickly. "Keep going."

Haltingly, choosing his words with care, Cid told her. When he had finished, Tifa had to swallow hard. Somehow, she felt she should've known this would happen. She should've known.

"Thanks for telling me, Cid," she whispered, not really aware of what she was saying. "I'm glad it was you."

"Teef, listen. She might pull through. We're going to beat Jenova, right? She might-"

"I…I really have to go." Dropping the PHS on the floor, she somehow got to her feet and fled the room, not running anywhere in particular, just away. She saw nothing through watery vision, but when she stumbled over cold steps she knew she was at the stairs to the basement. There she collapsed, burying her face in her arms.

She was losing everything she loved. Her mother…then her father…her beloved hometown…her bar, her friends in Sector 7…and now Adine. She couldn't take it anymore, not when she was losing Cloud as well.

Angrily she swiped at her eyes with the back of her hand, wiping away tears she hadn't even known she had shed. She had already lost him, long ago. She had just been too blind to see it.

Only then, just when she thought she had regained complete control over herself, did she begin to sob.

* * * * * *

Aeris quietly picked up the PHS from the floor and placed it on a side table. She looked at it for a moment, troubled. "I wish Cid had mentioned how the others are. Or where exactly they were."

"He would've told us, if Tifa hadn't gone and lost it like that," Cloud muttered with disgust. "She needs to pull herself together."

There was a heartbeat's worth of silence, then Zack grabbed Cloud by the shoulders and slammed him into the wall.

"You're so stupid!" the dark-haired man snarled, shaking him a little. "How can you be so damn stupid, Cloud?"

At first, Cloud looked oddly close to tears. Then the expression changed to anger. "Let go of me!"

"Not until you explain," Zack snarled. "How can you be so stupid as to purposely hurt her like this? It doesn't make any sense. You don't make any sense."

Aeris averted her eyes; Nanaki kept his own on the floor. Sufur, however, watched the scene closely. He seemed to be the only one actually enjoying the heated exchange.

"There are things," Cloud said, slowly and deliberately, "that you may not be aware of, Zack. You've only seen a small piece of the big picture. You-"

"Who gives a shit about the big picture?!" Zack yelled. He took a breath, then said, more quietly, "I know something's going on with you, Cloud. I can see it in your eyes." Cloud stiffened. Zack went on. "But that won't excuse you from the way you're treating others. Just…try to be a little more sensitive. That's all."

Cloud was limp in Zack's grasp. "That's part of the big picture, Zack," he said softly. "I'm telling you, I'm handling things right."

Zack gave him a long look. "I wish I could believe you," he said, releasing his hold. "I really do."

Cloud was silent, sinking to the floor with his back to the wall. Zack went over to the couch where Aeris was and sat beside her, not meeting her eyes.

If anyone had looked up, they would have seen Sufur smiling broadly.

* * * * * *

Tifa raised her head, groggily wondering where she was. She moved a little and let out a sharp gasp of pain. She had fallen asleep on the stone steps. Not a very comfy place to snooze, either.

She rolled her shoulders to ease the cramp and sat up, blinking. It was dark and quiet. The others were probably asleep.

Remembering why she had slept on stone stairs, Tifa sighed and passed a hand over her face. People always said it felt good to cry when you haven't for a long time. How untrue. Tifa felt worse than she had to begin with, and that was pretty bad.

Well, she wasn't about to spend the rest of the night here. She was freezing. Mounting the steps two at a time, she quickly but quietly made her way to the upper level. She would stop in the bathroom to wash her face first, she decided. It would not do for the others to see how upset she'd been.

At the entrance to the washroom she stopped, having heard a noise from down the hall. It was probably nothing.

Then why was she still standing there, listening?

It came again, a little cry, followed by noises she couldn't identify. Tifa hesitated. You're being stupid, she told herself. Someone's just talking to in his or her sleep. Just ignore it.

That decided, she turned and stepped into the washroom. Then she changed her mind and ran back down the hall, her shoes clacking loudly on the wooden floor.

The noises were coming from the sitting room, not the bedroom. Tifa rushed in and switched on the light.

There was a slam as Sufur slammed into the wall, courtesy of an angry shove. He caught himself before he fell, but otherwise didn't move, catching sight of the new arrival. Tifa stared in disbelief as her Aeris turned to her, looking frightened as well as incensed.

"Just what is going on here?" she demanded. Without thinking she lowered herself into a fighting stance.

"I'm sure we'd all like to know the answer to that," a voice said dryly. Sufur's head swiveled to the only other exit in the room- the doorway leading to the bedroom. It was blocked by Cloud, Zack, and Nanaki.

"He attacked me!" Aeris cried, clutching at the neck of her thin lavender nightgown. "He was going to kill me, I'm sure of it!"

Sufur's blue eyes met hers with hatred; he was caught, and he knew it. Then he gave a moan and fell to his knees, hands to his head. "What…happened?" He looked at the confused woman standing over him. "Aeris…did I…?" He jumped up, looking distressed. "Did I hurt you?"

She backed away from him quickly, obviously confused. "No."

"Looks more like she hurt you," Zack pointed out dryly, looking at several deep scratches on Sufur's arms. Perhaps surprisingly, Aeris didn't apologize, merely watched him warily.

"Cut the shit," Zack continued, meeting Sufur's gaze. "What happened?"

"There…was a voice in my head." Sufur swallowed hard. "I couldn't fight it. It was almost like it was…controlling me."

"Don't give us that-" Zack started to yell, but Cloud held up a hand to silence him.

"Are you saying Jenova told you to attack Aeris?" Cloud said quietly.

"Maybe. I don't know," Sufur said quietly. "Please believe me. I wasn't in control of my actions."

Nanaki looked at Aeris dubiously. "Aeris? Is he telling the truth?"

Aeris didn't answer right away. After a moment she sighed. "I guess so," she murmured. "I'm not sure."

Don't you give him the benefit of doubt, Aeris Gainsborough! Tifa thought viciously, unconsciously clenching and unclenching her fists. Not after he tries something like this!

Zack stepped between Aeris and Sufur, putting a protective arm around her. "You're alright?"

She pulled away. "I'm fine. I just…I don't know."

Zack turned to Cloud, who was still standing in the doorway. "I say we kill him."

Aeris gasped in horror, but said nothing. Tifa certainly had no objections. Nanaki lashed his tail back and forth, seemingly undecided.

Cloud looked back at Zack. "I can't do that."

"He's dangerous," Zack said flatly. "Whether he kills Aeris in cold blood or because he's under Jenova's control, she's still just as dead." He looked at her apologetically. "Sorry."

"I can't do that!" Cloud exploded. "Don't you get it? I almost killed Aeris once, because of the same reason he's giving! I've done stupid things, because my mind wasn't my own! I can't kill him because of this!"

Tifa felt a lump rise in her throat. Cloud had once come close to killing them all because of Jenova's control. Yet she had followed him because she had faith in him.

He was right. They couldn't kill Sufur.

"Fine," Zack said, shifting from one foot to the other. "It's up to you." He didn't sound thrilled about it.

Cloud rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Okay, Sufur, sorry, but you'll be guarded at all times. We'll take shifts on a two-man watch. Who wants to go first?"

"I will," Tifa said instantly. Cloud had asked her to keep an eye on Sufur. She wouldn't let him down.

He gave her a weak smile. "Thanks."

"Maybe you shouldn't," Zack interjected. "You've had a rough night."

Cloud was looking like he'd had enough of Zack questioning his orders. "She volunteered."

"Then so do I," Zack said coldly.

"Fine!" Cloud snapped. Without another word he stalked out of the room.

Tifa was puzzled. Something was going on between them, and she had the uncomfortable feeling she was a part of it.

Sufur was looking irritated. "Well, aren't you going to tie me up?" he said sarcastically.

Against all odds, Zack grinned. "Nope. Got a better idea. You see, I've got this Seal materia, and one of my favorite spells happens to be Sleepel…"

* * * * * *

Since Zack had conveniently timed his spell so that Sufur conked out on the floor, he and Tifa had the couch to themselves. He reclined back, stretching his legs out in front of him. Tifa didn't look nearly as comfortable; she sat stiffly, her lean muscles knotted with tension. Again he felt that surprising hostility toward Cloud, that feeling that he was pushing the careworn Tifa too hard. He knew she was doing this because she felt she had to. Maybe to make up for losing control earlier.

"Do you trust him?" she suddenly asked, her eyes on Sufur.

"Hm? Nope. Not in the least." He sighed. "For one thing, it's kinda hard to trust someone whose features keep blending together."

She looked at him sharply. "You notice, too? I'm not just imagining things?"

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. "Tifa, let me tell ya something. Last night, I asked him. I just went up and asked him why he looks to damn freaky. Know what he did? He laughed- not a nice laugh- and didn't say a word. Tuned me out when I asked again. He's got something up his sleeve. I'd like to know what it is."

She put a hand to her head, as though to keep it from splitting apart. "Me, too. We'll just have to wait until we reach Nibelheim. I have a feeling all the answers are there." She gave a brave smile. "It'll be nice to see everyone again. It's been ages."

He snorted. "Yeah, real nice to see that smartass Turk again. You notice something? The last few days have been actually quiet, without him around." What? Where had that come from?

She looked at him oddly, but didn't say anything. Zack looked at the floor, a bit flustered. Her eyes seemed to be looking into the very core of his being, exposing secrets he didn't even know he had. Suddenly he felt ashamed, and he didn't even know why. What was she thinking? Why didn't she say anything? She could at least yell at him for calling Reno "smartass". Even though it was true.

"How are you holding up?" she asked carefully, still looking at him as though trying to figure him out. Zack stiffened.

"You mean, with my sword-fighting skills? Hard to say, I haven't practiced in a while. Maybe I should spar with Cloud or something. Y'know, he gave me back the Buster Sword. Said he liked the Ultima Weapon better or something-"

"Zack-"

"Or maybe you're talking about my eating habits. You're right, I haven't been eating well lately. Well, we are on the road, and I am sick of this damn dried fruit and unidentifiable chunks of meat-"

"Zack, I said-"

"Well, what are you talking about!" he suddenly exploded, inexplicably angry, but not with her. "I can't read your mind, you know!"

"Zack, I meant with Aeris," she said patiently. "How are you holding up with…what's going on with her and Reno?"

He glared. "'Going on'? When was there something 'going on' between them?"

She sighed. "You're not making this easy. Everyone else has noticed. Don't you think that maybe they're…in love?"

He grunted noncommittally.

"So…what I'm saying is, do you have a problem with Reno?" she said quietly. "We're going to meet up with him soon, that's all. May as well get it out in the open."

He looked away, suddenly finding the slumbering form of Sufur very interesting. "He's an asshole," he said lightly. "Grade-A asshole."

She touched his shoulder gently. "Reno's not an asshole, Zack," she said softly. "I mean, I had my doubts about him at first too." She actually laughed a bit, just a little chuckle under her breath. "But, as I've gotten to know him better, I think he's really a good person, behind that loud and…slightly obnoxious exterior. He…he has some qualities that…really suit Aeris' nicely. She's brought out the good in him." He looked back to see her smiling distantly. "I think they're really meant for each other." She shook her head, coming back to earth. "I'm sorry," she apologized suddenly. "I didn't mean to say that…when you-"

He shrugged off her hand, giving her a cold smirk. "Don't worry about it," he informed her coolly. "Look, Aeris is an adult, capable of making her own decisions. If that Reno's what floats her boat, well, whatever, fine with me." Sufur was starting to look interesting again.

She put her hand over his. "Zack. Even though Aeris may not love you in that way anymore, you still have her friendship, and Cloud's. And mine." She squeezed his hand, then suddenly let go. He turned and looked at her, but she didn't meet his gaze. "And, even though I've been kind of a wreck lately…" she whispered, "you can talk to me, and I'll listen. I may not be able to help, but…I can be there for you." She seemed more like she was talking to herself, now. "After all, I know…" She swallowed hard. "I know what it's like to love someone who can't love me back…"

"Tifa, listen." He hesitated, not sure if he should say it. "About Cloud…Something's going on with him. I'm not sure what, but he's dealing with it in his own way. When he snaps at you, he doesn't mean it. You know that, right?"

She didn't say anything. Zack thought he could almost feel her heart breaking. Hating himself for bringing this up, he went on.

"I mean, he really cares for you. I know it." She still didn't look up. Zack lapsed into an awkward silence, fidgeting.

"Please," she said softly, almost too soft to hear. "Can we not talk about Cloud right now? I don't…I don't really want to."

He nodded. "Sure."

Tifa was blinking furiously, but whatever emotions she was struggling with, she kept them to herself. She pulled her legs up on the couch and wrapped her arms around them, resting her chin on her knees. She suddenly looked very forlorn, in that moment. Like a little girl. Lost.

Gripped by impulse, he put his arms around her slender shoulders and drew her to him, hugging her gently. "I know you don't want to talk about it," he whispered. "It's just…I think we both need to be held right now."

She seemed to relax a bit. "Thank you," she whispered, her voice muffled by his shirt. "I'd like that."

After a time, her breathing slowed and her grip around his middle slackened. Zack knew he should wake her (they were, after all, on guard duty), but he just couldn't make himself do it. It felt so peaceful, here like this, with his arms around the sleeping form of Tifa Lockheart. He hadn't held a woman like this…for a long time. And she really was beautiful.

He sighed, knowing there'd be hell to pay if Cloud woke up and saw them like this. She wouldn't want that.

Ah, I'll wake her eventually, he thought. Why not let her sleep for a while? It's not like Sufur's going anywhere.

That decided, he relaxed, and let her sleep.

Dedicated to Zelda6, who was the inspiration for this chap. She also edited and fixed everything, and made it all sparkly…go blame her for the nice condition it's in.

Hmm…is this becoming a love triangle? *Lila loves love triangles* Okay, I'll accept reader input. Just don't kill me if you don't get your way.

~Lila

PS- WOO! That was a LONG one, for me! Do you people like them shorter or longer? I dunno…maybe I like them shorter…*falls off computer chair*