Chapter 5- It's Beginning To Look A Lot Like...Christmas?!
Soon, the snow began to fall and cover the town in a blanket of white. Of course, what's Christmas without snow? And what's snow without a good snowball fight?! So how did the sides get chosen? Well, it sort of went something like this.
It was a beautiful Monday morning. The snow was slowly drifting to the ground, and Bryan came in for his morning Dew. He opened the refrigerator, turned around and screamed, dropping his Dew.
"What?" Peter asked.
"You're...You're drinking...Vanilla Coke?!" Bryan yelled.
Indeed he was. Peter had just opened a can of sweet Vanilla Coke. He shrugged. "So?"
Just then, Tracy, Steph and Kitt walked in drinking Vanilla Coke as well. Bryan froze and screamed again. "YOU'RE ALL SAVAGES!!!"
He quickly grabbed the can of the Dew and ran off, screaming. Soon, the house was divided between the Vanilla Coke lovers and those devoted to the Dew. And of course, each dragged a Fellowship member or two with them.
Vanilla Coke:
Kitt
Legolas
Steph
Boromir
Tracy
Pippin (The Dew was "getting old.")
Peter
Arwen
Tippy
Faramir
The Dew:
Bryan
Eowyn
Dajotre
Sam
Brittney
Merry
Ashley
Frodo
Lisa
Aragorn
Ben
Gimli
Gandalf...just because
The Realm of the Vanilla Coke
11:00 A.M.
Faramir and Boromir look over a map.
"What news?" Faramir asked.
"Our scouts report the Dew has built forces outside of the unneccesary garage. Aragorn is organizing another by the mailbox. But we must look to our own borders. Faramir, the Dew is on the move. Bryan is marshaling an army. They are developing their fortress quickly," Boromir reported.
"How many?" Faramir questioned.
"About a dozen," Boromir answered.
Faramir leaned over the map. "Who's covering the backyard?"
"We pulled five of us out, but if it's attacked, we may not hold," Boromir said.
"Bryan attacks from the garage. Aragorn from the mailbox. The fight will come to the Dew on both fronts. Vanilla Coke is growing weak. Aragorn will strike us soon. And he will strike hard. He knows now we do not have the strength to repel him." Faramir mused.
Tip popped out of nowhere. "That sounds vaguely familiar."
Faramir walked outside to see everyone working on the fort by the tree in the backyard. "How is it coming?"
"It would be coming along a lot faster if SOME people will help us!" Steph yelled, glaring at Kitt.
Kitt was sitting down on a lawn chair (yes in the snow) and reading another Orlando Bloom magazine. "Don't look at me."
Faramir glared at her as well. "Get up!"
"No!" Kitt shot back.
"Bogus!" Bryan yelled from the other side of the yard.
Legolas came over and smiled his million dollar smile. "Please Kitt..."
Kitt grinned and jumped up. "Anything for you, my love!"
She grabbed a shovel and started to build the fort.
The Fortress of the Dew
11:30 A.M.
Soon, the Dew had a fortress by the garage and mailbox fully built. Aragorn came over to Gimli, beant over a map as well. He was about to ask for a report, but suddenly, a scream echoed through the house. Lisa bolted into the room.
"Aragorn!" she shouted. "Man down!"
Aragorn ran outside to see Ben lying on the ground, chunks of snow all over his coat and face.
"Ben? Ben!" Aragorn yelled. "Speak to me!"
"Aragorn..." he whispered.
"What is it?" Aragorn said.
"Aragorn..." Ben said faintly. "There is...another....Dew....in the fridge...."
The others took good care of Ben, nursing him back to health...except for Dajotre who could care less about anything. (Just kidding Daj.)
"This is but a taste of the terror that Faramir will unleash," Gandalf said to Bryan. "All the more potent for he is driven mad by fear of defeat. Rush out and meet him head on. Draw him away from our fortress. We must fight!"
"You have 2 good men setting up base by them as we speak," Aragorn added. "Gimli is loyal to you. He and Merry will return and fight for you."
"They will be ready to fight by now," Bryan said. "Gimli can't help us. I know what you want from me. But I will not bring further injury to my friends. I will not risk open war!"
"Open war is upon you, whether you would risk it or not," Aragorn shot back.
Bryan slowly turned around. "When last I checked, Bryan, not Aragorn, was first chair trumpet."
"Then what is the first chair trumpet player's decision?" Gandalf asked.
The Realm of the Vanilla Coke
1:37 P.M.
Faramir opened up the map again. He and Peter were huddled over it, planning out their attacks. Legolas then came in.
"We have just finished the next fortress by the west corridor of the house," Legolas reported.
Peter paused. "...What?"
Legolas sighed and shook his head. "Kids...we finished that fortress over there," he said, gesturing to the right.
"Oh!" Peter said. "Okay. Groot!" (Groot=goodgreat) Yes Peter, I have stolen groot from you, and I am now using it as my own word in this piece of literature that you have not bothered to read. --
"So...now what?" Legolas asked.
Silence
Faramir and Peter opened their mouth several times, but then closed it, as if the idea had just been lost in the wind.
"You mean to tell me that we have no plan?!" Legolas yelled.
"I'm thinking! I'm thinking!" Peter glared.
Faramir shot up. "I got it! We do nothing at all!"
"Brilliant!" Peter grinned.
Legolas groaned and stormed out of the room. In the kitchen, the kids were sitting around the table with Vanilla Coke in hand. Legolas glared at all of them.
"Here we are on the brink of civil war, and it's all over a stupid drink!" he screamed.
"Hey man," Pippin said. "Vanilla Coke isn't just a drink. It's life!"
Legolas said something in Elvish that was either "censored you" or "I see a Democrat." (No offense to Democrats.)
Just then, Tracy came bursting into the room.
"Ambush!!!" she screamed.
Faramir, Peter and Legolas bolted out the door after Tracy. The four hid behind a fortress, while the others were throwing and being hit by a volley of snowballs.
"Now what do we do?" Tracy asked.
There was silence...
"Wait!" Faramir exclaimed. "I've got it!"
"What?" the other asked.
"We bring in reinforcements!" Faramir suggested.
"Oh, good idea, Captain," Legolas said. "Only one problem...WE DON'T HAVE ANY REINFORCEMENTS!!!"
Faramir paused. "...Oh."
Peter thought for a moment. "We could surrender! But then of course, we'd be French." (No offence to French.)
Just then, Pippin was knocked to the ground. Tracy mournfully looked after him. "We've gotta do something! Our friends are being shot down out there!"
Legolas got up to his feet and began his speech. "We who are about to die salute you!!!"
Everybody fighting (and those falling to the ground) paused to look at the Elf. Faramir, Peter and Tracy jumped up as well, snowballs in hand.
"CHARGE!!!" Legolas shouted.
He and the three others ran towards the petrified Forces of the Dew. The four fearless warriors chucked snowballs at the opposing side, knocking Merry to the ground.
"Husband!" Brittney screamed, running to his side.
The Forces of the Vanilla Coke stood in awe at the four that were sacrificing themselves for their friends. Then, they started cheering, and running forward....
....Only to find out that those "who are about to die" were dead. (In a manner of speaking.) Avenging their friends' deaths, they threw the last of the ammunition at the Forces of the Dew, and finished them off.
After a day of recovery, Tracy and Faramir were back on their feet. The others that had been shot down were still healing, but quickly.
"So tell us what happened," Tippy said.
"Huh?" Tracy said. (A blow to her head had jostled her memory.)
Tippy sighed. "Tell us why you, Peter, Legolas and my man- I mean- Faramir, were hit."
"Oh!" Tracy exclaimed. "Riiiiight...let's see. Well, we started running into the battle to...to...."
"....save us?" Kitt suggested.
"Yes! Yes! Save us!" Tracy nodded. "Right! So then that one guy that Tip's mad at...umm...what's his name?"
"Dajotre?" Stephanie asked.
Tracy snapped her fingers. "Yes! Dajotre!"
"Dajotre suddenly jumped out with Br...Bry...Bryyyyaaannnn," she said, trying to remember how to say his name.
"This is going to be a lonnnng story..." Boromir grumbled.
"..and anyways, they started throwing the round spheres of that cold, wet, white stuff at us. And then...who's that short guy?"
"Gimli?" Boromir asked.
"No no. The other short guy!" Tracy said.
"Ben?" Arwen tried.
"Yeah! Him!" Tracy nodded. "Then he threw an ice ball at my head!"
"That explains a lot..." Boromir mumbled, followed by Tippy smacking him.
"Finish the story, Faramir dear," Tippy smiled, happy that Eowyn was on the side of the Dew.
"Well, then I saw Bryan shoot Legolas down, and Aragorn got Peter," Faramir replied. "And then I think Dajotre and Ben shot me at the same time. So...yes...that's all I remember."
"And then the Tip fearlessly sacrificed herself to save Faramir and-" Tippy was cut off.
"Tip, you didn't get hit at all so it wasn't a sacrifice," Kitt reminded.
Tip glared at her. "But it WOULD have been!"
Soon, the treaty was established. Daj had inconspicuously added "Daj is king" to the last part, but no one was able to catch it. Everybody recovered, and soon, December came.
(Next Chapter: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!...I hope I'll be putting that one up...)
Soon, the snow began to fall and cover the town in a blanket of white. Of course, what's Christmas without snow? And what's snow without a good snowball fight?! So how did the sides get chosen? Well, it sort of went something like this.
It was a beautiful Monday morning. The snow was slowly drifting to the ground, and Bryan came in for his morning Dew. He opened the refrigerator, turned around and screamed, dropping his Dew.
"What?" Peter asked.
"You're...You're drinking...Vanilla Coke?!" Bryan yelled.
Indeed he was. Peter had just opened a can of sweet Vanilla Coke. He shrugged. "So?"
Just then, Tracy, Steph and Kitt walked in drinking Vanilla Coke as well. Bryan froze and screamed again. "YOU'RE ALL SAVAGES!!!"
He quickly grabbed the can of the Dew and ran off, screaming. Soon, the house was divided between the Vanilla Coke lovers and those devoted to the Dew. And of course, each dragged a Fellowship member or two with them.
Vanilla Coke:
Kitt
Legolas
Steph
Boromir
Tracy
Pippin (The Dew was "getting old.")
Peter
Arwen
Tippy
Faramir
The Dew:
Bryan
Eowyn
Dajotre
Sam
Brittney
Merry
Ashley
Frodo
Lisa
Aragorn
Ben
Gimli
Gandalf...just because
The Realm of the Vanilla Coke
11:00 A.M.
Faramir and Boromir look over a map.
"What news?" Faramir asked.
"Our scouts report the Dew has built forces outside of the unneccesary garage. Aragorn is organizing another by the mailbox. But we must look to our own borders. Faramir, the Dew is on the move. Bryan is marshaling an army. They are developing their fortress quickly," Boromir reported.
"How many?" Faramir questioned.
"About a dozen," Boromir answered.
Faramir leaned over the map. "Who's covering the backyard?"
"We pulled five of us out, but if it's attacked, we may not hold," Boromir said.
"Bryan attacks from the garage. Aragorn from the mailbox. The fight will come to the Dew on both fronts. Vanilla Coke is growing weak. Aragorn will strike us soon. And he will strike hard. He knows now we do not have the strength to repel him." Faramir mused.
Tip popped out of nowhere. "That sounds vaguely familiar."
Faramir walked outside to see everyone working on the fort by the tree in the backyard. "How is it coming?"
"It would be coming along a lot faster if SOME people will help us!" Steph yelled, glaring at Kitt.
Kitt was sitting down on a lawn chair (yes in the snow) and reading another Orlando Bloom magazine. "Don't look at me."
Faramir glared at her as well. "Get up!"
"No!" Kitt shot back.
"Bogus!" Bryan yelled from the other side of the yard.
Legolas came over and smiled his million dollar smile. "Please Kitt..."
Kitt grinned and jumped up. "Anything for you, my love!"
She grabbed a shovel and started to build the fort.
The Fortress of the Dew
11:30 A.M.
Soon, the Dew had a fortress by the garage and mailbox fully built. Aragorn came over to Gimli, beant over a map as well. He was about to ask for a report, but suddenly, a scream echoed through the house. Lisa bolted into the room.
"Aragorn!" she shouted. "Man down!"
Aragorn ran outside to see Ben lying on the ground, chunks of snow all over his coat and face.
"Ben? Ben!" Aragorn yelled. "Speak to me!"
"Aragorn..." he whispered.
"What is it?" Aragorn said.
"Aragorn..." Ben said faintly. "There is...another....Dew....in the fridge...."
The others took good care of Ben, nursing him back to health...except for Dajotre who could care less about anything. (Just kidding Daj.)
"This is but a taste of the terror that Faramir will unleash," Gandalf said to Bryan. "All the more potent for he is driven mad by fear of defeat. Rush out and meet him head on. Draw him away from our fortress. We must fight!"
"You have 2 good men setting up base by them as we speak," Aragorn added. "Gimli is loyal to you. He and Merry will return and fight for you."
"They will be ready to fight by now," Bryan said. "Gimli can't help us. I know what you want from me. But I will not bring further injury to my friends. I will not risk open war!"
"Open war is upon you, whether you would risk it or not," Aragorn shot back.
Bryan slowly turned around. "When last I checked, Bryan, not Aragorn, was first chair trumpet."
"Then what is the first chair trumpet player's decision?" Gandalf asked.
The Realm of the Vanilla Coke
1:37 P.M.
Faramir opened up the map again. He and Peter were huddled over it, planning out their attacks. Legolas then came in.
"We have just finished the next fortress by the west corridor of the house," Legolas reported.
Peter paused. "...What?"
Legolas sighed and shook his head. "Kids...we finished that fortress over there," he said, gesturing to the right.
"Oh!" Peter said. "Okay. Groot!" (Groot=goodgreat) Yes Peter, I have stolen groot from you, and I am now using it as my own word in this piece of literature that you have not bothered to read. --
"So...now what?" Legolas asked.
Silence
Faramir and Peter opened their mouth several times, but then closed it, as if the idea had just been lost in the wind.
"You mean to tell me that we have no plan?!" Legolas yelled.
"I'm thinking! I'm thinking!" Peter glared.
Faramir shot up. "I got it! We do nothing at all!"
"Brilliant!" Peter grinned.
Legolas groaned and stormed out of the room. In the kitchen, the kids were sitting around the table with Vanilla Coke in hand. Legolas glared at all of them.
"Here we are on the brink of civil war, and it's all over a stupid drink!" he screamed.
"Hey man," Pippin said. "Vanilla Coke isn't just a drink. It's life!"
Legolas said something in Elvish that was either "censored you" or "I see a Democrat." (No offense to Democrats.)
Just then, Tracy came bursting into the room.
"Ambush!!!" she screamed.
Faramir, Peter and Legolas bolted out the door after Tracy. The four hid behind a fortress, while the others were throwing and being hit by a volley of snowballs.
"Now what do we do?" Tracy asked.
There was silence...
"Wait!" Faramir exclaimed. "I've got it!"
"What?" the other asked.
"We bring in reinforcements!" Faramir suggested.
"Oh, good idea, Captain," Legolas said. "Only one problem...WE DON'T HAVE ANY REINFORCEMENTS!!!"
Faramir paused. "...Oh."
Peter thought for a moment. "We could surrender! But then of course, we'd be French." (No offence to French.)
Just then, Pippin was knocked to the ground. Tracy mournfully looked after him. "We've gotta do something! Our friends are being shot down out there!"
Legolas got up to his feet and began his speech. "We who are about to die salute you!!!"
Everybody fighting (and those falling to the ground) paused to look at the Elf. Faramir, Peter and Tracy jumped up as well, snowballs in hand.
"CHARGE!!!" Legolas shouted.
He and the three others ran towards the petrified Forces of the Dew. The four fearless warriors chucked snowballs at the opposing side, knocking Merry to the ground.
"Husband!" Brittney screamed, running to his side.
The Forces of the Vanilla Coke stood in awe at the four that were sacrificing themselves for their friends. Then, they started cheering, and running forward....
....Only to find out that those "who are about to die" were dead. (In a manner of speaking.) Avenging their friends' deaths, they threw the last of the ammunition at the Forces of the Dew, and finished them off.
After a day of recovery, Tracy and Faramir were back on their feet. The others that had been shot down were still healing, but quickly.
"So tell us what happened," Tippy said.
"Huh?" Tracy said. (A blow to her head had jostled her memory.)
Tippy sighed. "Tell us why you, Peter, Legolas and my man- I mean- Faramir, were hit."
"Oh!" Tracy exclaimed. "Riiiiight...let's see. Well, we started running into the battle to...to...."
"....save us?" Kitt suggested.
"Yes! Yes! Save us!" Tracy nodded. "Right! So then that one guy that Tip's mad at...umm...what's his name?"
"Dajotre?" Stephanie asked.
Tracy snapped her fingers. "Yes! Dajotre!"
"Dajotre suddenly jumped out with Br...Bry...Bryyyyaaannnn," she said, trying to remember how to say his name.
"This is going to be a lonnnng story..." Boromir grumbled.
"..and anyways, they started throwing the round spheres of that cold, wet, white stuff at us. And then...who's that short guy?"
"Gimli?" Boromir asked.
"No no. The other short guy!" Tracy said.
"Ben?" Arwen tried.
"Yeah! Him!" Tracy nodded. "Then he threw an ice ball at my head!"
"That explains a lot..." Boromir mumbled, followed by Tippy smacking him.
"Finish the story, Faramir dear," Tippy smiled, happy that Eowyn was on the side of the Dew.
"Well, then I saw Bryan shoot Legolas down, and Aragorn got Peter," Faramir replied. "And then I think Dajotre and Ben shot me at the same time. So...yes...that's all I remember."
"And then the Tip fearlessly sacrificed herself to save Faramir and-" Tippy was cut off.
"Tip, you didn't get hit at all so it wasn't a sacrifice," Kitt reminded.
Tip glared at her. "But it WOULD have been!"
Soon, the treaty was established. Daj had inconspicuously added "Daj is king" to the last part, but no one was able to catch it. Everybody recovered, and soon, December came.
(Next Chapter: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year!...I hope I'll be putting that one up...)