Sassy: I am back all my little fangirls and fanboys!

Phantom: Finally! *runs up and glomps Sassy*

Sekura: Those of you who read Witty Phantom's fics, Sassy would be the fuck toy I keep mentioning.

Sassy: Shut up. You're just bitter because you have no one. *tosses Trent from Hicky's fic into Sekura's lap*

Sekura: *looks rather NOT pleased*

Sassy: I've said I don't own Yu-Gi-Oh in the summary. But I have yet to say that I do not own lines from 'Dude, Where's My Car', the sending dance preformed by Lord Braska in FFX, mechanical ferret ball things, House Hippos and any other add/game/movie that caught your attention.

Phantom: House Hippo! SWEET!

Sekura: *shakes head*

Phantom: Quiet you...
__

Two's Company, Three's a Crowd... Yeah Right

"What I meant was… I'm sorry I didn't come in sooner," Chaos said, one hand on his hip and a saucy grin on his lips.

"Goddamnit Chaos! Get the hell out!" Luster said, glaring daggers at the mage.

Chaos swayed his hips a little as he made his way closer to the pair on the bed.

"I said, get-"

"Luster..." Gaia whispered quietly, "maybe he... could... stay."

The green-skinned warrior turned his attention, abruptly, to his boyfriend. His mouth was slightly open in shock and he had to think over what Gaia had said a few times. "Him? Stay?"

"Oh, I do like the way this warrior thinks," Chaos said grinning and taking off his own shirt.

Luster glanced at Chaos for a moment before looking back at Gaia. He lean forward until his lips were right against the grey-skinned man's ear. "If it is what you'd like." He turned to Chaos. "Take off your pants."

Chaos did so, and joined the two warriors on the bed. "You won't regret this," he said as he placed his lips on Gaia's neck and began sucking lightly.

Gaia sighed and brought Luster down, kissing him hard. One hand found its way to the back of Chaos's head to force his lips harder against his neck. The other ran down Luster's back and over his ass. He gripped at the perfect flesh, causing Luster to moan against his mouth.

The mage bit down hard on Gaia's neck, but did not break the skin. This action forced the warrior's mouth to open in a gasp, pulling away from Luster as he did so. But, with his grey-skinned lover's mouth open, Luster could not help pressing his lips against Gaia's and moving his tongue into the other's mouth.

As his tongue moved to find Gaia's, his hand ran roughly up Chaos's inner thigh. But there was one problem and the mage decided to comment. "Why don't we stop with the foreplay and make with the fucking."

It definitely was not a question and both warriors seemed to be fine with what was said. "Does the sex queen have an idea already?" Luster said, tilting his head toward Chaos, which got slapped back to its original position.

"Don't call me a queen, bitch. Now get your little fuck toy ready," Chaos said, pushing Luster a bit so he had room for what he was going to do. He ran his tongue up and down Gaia's length, causing the warrior to whimper a little.

But whimpers turned to low moans as he felt a slick finger pushing its way inside him. Soon one finger became two and then three, and the tongue that was running along his erection was replaced with a hot, wet mouth. For his first time, this was a bit extreme.

Luster used his other hand to coat himself before tossing the lubricant to the side. "What now Chaos?" the ritual warrior asked, deciding to go with whatever the mage had thought up.

Chaos brought is mouth away from Gaia's hard length and looked up at Luster. "You, get to fuck him, and I-" the mage moved and kneeled right over Gaia's hips, so his entrance was just above the tip of Gaia's cock.

Luster raised an eyebrow, seeing exactly what Chaos was going to do and how everything was going to work. He lifted Gaia slightly, causing his boyfriend to brush against Chaos's ass. The green-skinned man pushed slowly into his lover. He knew that it would hurt and that Gaia was definitely no use to the feeling.

Gaia cringed and dug his finger into the sheets. Sure he had been prepped, but Luster wasn't just the average man. He didn't even realize that Chaos seemed to be waiting for something. When Luster stopped moving he tried to relax his body, and two hands rubbing circles on his chest were quite helpful.

After a few moments Chaos nudged Luster, telling him to push in further, and after that was done the two waited a few moments for Gaia to adjust. The third time however, Chaos sent a mental message at the ritual behind him. 'This time, all the way, and not too slow.'

Luster blinked but did so, and as Chaos felt Luster move, he moved also, dropping his body onto Gaia's, forcing the warrior's length to push inside him. He grinned at the reaction the team work of the two rituals had caused in the third party.

Gaia screamed, a sound of pain and pure ecstasy. He was both filled and surrounded, his lover inside him and... a skilled mage on top. Within a minute the youngest of the three moved a little against Luster. And as his lover pulled out, Chaos lifted himself up so Gaia was barely inside him. Then, in unison, the ritual warrior pushed in and the ritual mage forced his weight down.

Gaia's head tossed left and right. It was such an overwhelming experience to have two men working wonders with your body. After a few thrusts Gaia caught up and set to work on getting in on the rhythm. His idea would most likely throw Chaos off a bit, but that was fine with him. He grabbed hold of the mage's hips and held him down the next time he could.

Chaos looked at the warrior a little perplexed, but decided to go with whatever he was planning. Anyway, he was the guest in this little escapade. So, he waited as Luster thrust back into his grey-skinned lover and felt Gaia ride the motion and thrust up into him. Then he felt Gaia lift his body as the green-skin warrior pulled out. Luster pushing in, hard, once more, Chaos came down and Gaia's hips bucked up as Luster's thrust finished.

Now all three monsters were moving in a rhythm that seemed even beyond perfect. Gaia was panting worse than a dog under the hot sun, and screaming with pure lust and pleasure coursing through him. Luster was moaning and breathing hard, but Chaos, Chaos was only covered in a thin, glistening sweat. How long could this man go?

The answer was rather surprising. As Gaia screamed once more, louder than ever, he released inside Chaos, every muscle in his body tightening. This caused Luster to shut his eyes as stars exploded in front of them, being greeted by the overly tight channel of his lover. It was no wonder he came too, deep within the body of his grey-skinned warrior.

But then there was Chaos. As the two warriors gasped and panted he simply removed himself from around Gaia and rolled to lie on his back, propped up by pillows. Once he had decided that they had caught their breath enough he looked over, only to see the two trying to cuddle. "I don't think so," he said giving them a 'do that and I rape you one at a time while the other watches' look. This, of coursed, caused both of them to give their full attention to the blue-skinned demon.

"It looks as if you have not changed after all," Luster said, frowning a little.

"Shut up about me and get down there," Chaos said as he moved his head in a way to indicate what Luster was to do. "And you ," he said looking to Gaia, "do whatever you want.." 'You need the practice.'

Luster actually grinned. Sure Chaos was being a fucking prick but hell, he was as hard as a rock, and that was not a very comfortable feeling for any man. So, he settled himself down between Chaos's brilliant blue legs, and leaned down to take the mage in his mouth. This wasn't for fun, or some romantic notion; in all truth Luster was fairly set on making sure he didn't even have to taste the mage's seed. This was just sucking him off, and that was that.

Chaos propped himself up on his elbows to watch Luster as he worked. The green-skinned ritual quickly took him in his mouth and down his throat. Chaos grinned and thrust lightly, trying to indicate what he wanted, or trying to choke the other, no one was really sure. But the ritual warrior took it surprisingly well, shifted his position and practically dared Chaos to do that again.

And he was quite ready when the mage pulled himself out and thrust back in. His eyes glinted and Chaos's narrowed. It seemed the two were going to have a little duel of their own. Although the spell-caster seemed set on getting himself off, he also seemed to want to show up Luster; show him he couldn't really handle the task ahead of him.

The red-haired deity took it all. Every thrust, and move the other made. He used his tongue, lips, throat; anything to force Chaos to lose control. He shifted his eyes to look up at the mage and as their eyes locked, he worked even harder, until the stare was broken by Chaos's head being thrown back. Yes, that was it. He kept up exactly what he was doing, save he had to move his mouth up and down the other ritual's length as Chaos had lost, what seemed like, all his control and could no longer keep up his thrusting.

Gaia knelt to the side, practically gawking at the ritual pair. Such skill, such movement, even the sounds coming from Chaos; he was sure he'd never be capable of any of it. But his thoughts brightened as Luster pulled his mouth away from the mage's length, turned his face, and closed his eyes as Chaos came all over them both.

The black-haired man lay panting for a few moments before propping himself back up and grinning at Luster. "Not bad," he said calmly, not even giving the green-skinned ritual the respect he deserved for doing things few men could. As it were, Chaos decided on not releasing at all, but it seemed even he could not handle Luster's mouth. Too bad, for him, it belonged to Gaia.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*deet*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Gaia was the first to wake. He looked at Luster who was curled up next to him, and Chaos resting off on the other side of the bed. He scooted off the edge of Luster's bed and went to get dressed, remembering he had cut his bunny-hug {~Sassy:... I can't believe I just typed that~} off in the process of undressing earlier. He sighed and went over to look through his 'it's about time' lover's drawers. He found one shirt that he actually liked and put in on. He looked back as his sleeping beauty before turning and headed out of the room. He stopped, half way out the door and took a huge step back inside, eyes on something leaning against the wall.

Now, this thing was not just an ordinary something to be leaning where anyone could grab it. It was long and thin and black, had a blade at the bottom and a fancy red part at the top, with a greenish gem imbedded inside. Gaia stared at it for a moment before reaching out, grabbing it, and dashing out the door.

He stopped at the stairwell for a moment. He had just stole something from a very powerful dark mage, and what, for a little fun? Well, who was he going to mess around with. Who else could get a hold of a magician's staff?... And so, he sprinted up to floor three. He looked left and right down the hall, and when he was sure that no one was about, he snuck over to the room belonging to one, Dark Magician.

He moved to the edge of the door and held the stolen goods up against the wall so Dark would not see if he were to answer. He knocked and sighed with relief as Celtic opened the door, smiling broadly. "Gaia?" he asked looking a little confused, his smile have faltered a little. "Can I help you with anything?"

Gaia poked his head into the room around Celtic and peered around. "Dark not here?" He asked looking back at the elf.

"Umm, no, he had to go do something. Whhyyy?" he asked as his feline eyes narrowed slightly.

"Did he take his staff with him?" Gaia asked, eyes beginning to sparkle.

Celtic looked around the room and caught site of his lover's green staff. He sighed and smiled again. "No, I hope he didn't just forget it."

"So it's in there?!" the grey-skinned warriors was getting a little too energetic.

"Yeah it is, why?" the elf tilted his head in confusion at Gaia's antics.

"Cause, this." He brought his hand in front of himself so Celtic could see.

The green-blond went wide eyed and pulled Gaia inside the room. "Where did you get a mage's staff?! And who's is it???"

Gaia grinned widely. "I got it from his room, and it's Chaos's."

Celtic's eyes went even wider. "Chaos? You stole Chaos's staff?!"

"Wanna go mess around with 'em? You use Dark's, I'll use this one," he said shaking the staff lightly.

"Just take personal staffs that don't belong to us and do not know how to use?"

"I did say 'mess around', not, make trees dance."

Celtic gave Gaia a very odd look. "Trees? Dance?"

"It was just something specific. So, you gonna come?"

The elf looked from Dark's staff to Gaia's eager face. Back and forth, back and forth. Then he reached out, grabbed the green shaft and pulled it towards himself. He grinned a little and looked to Gaia once more. "Where to?"

Gaia threw his fist in the air and gave a triumphant 'yes!'. "We gotta go outside. I got no idea how much destruction we might cause."

Celtic thought about his for a moment. Two warriors, never having a day of training with magic in their entire, long, lives were now wielding the staffs of two of the strongest mages known to Ancient Egypt and to duelists everywhere.

So, down the stairs the two warriors snuck, trying to hide the staffs they carried. They got to the first floor, skittered down the hall and hurried through the back door. The shadow light was a little brighter out back. It seemed to do that as you got further and further from the graveyard's center. The spherical gems glistened for a moment as Celtic and Gaia moved to stand across from each other.

Gaia seemed all to willing to try to use his stolen staff, but not knowing how he simply leapt around as if performing some type of ballet.

"What, in the name of Ra, are you doing?" Celtic said watching the grey-skinned man hop and spin the staff... dropping it.

"What?" he asked as he leaned down to pick up the weapon. "It's what the spell-casters do."

"That," Celtic said, indicating Gaia's movements, "is definitely not what they do."

"Then show us how it's done Pimp Masta Elf."

'Who's 'us'?' Celtic asked before taking up a stance and pulling off a move that look surprisingly like a dance also. In all truth it looked very much like {~Sassy: Lord Braska's sending dance from FFX~}. And even with all the grace of an elf, he still did not look right. His muscled body swinging around the feather light staff. It seems, well, wrong.

Well, off went Gaia again. This time doing less of a dance and more of a quick move before holding the staff out to the side. Suddenly a little 'pop' was heard and the pair of miscreants looked up to see a little puff of smoke right about the gem in Chaos's staff. "Dude..."

"Sweet..." Celtic immediately tried to pull a little stunt of his own which earned him a 'phweee-EEEEE' sound and a ball of light whizzing around in the air. His eyes lit up as he watched the little sphere. The light zoomed over to the smoke above Gaia and zipped around it in tight circles before dropping to the ground. After another second it began rolling over the greenish dirt and into the short blue grass. The smoke had seemed to become attached to one part of it and it spun and tumbled with the ball. It looked like some small, furry creature was chasing it.

Celtic grinned at the little ball of light, pulled another series of moves and pointed the tip of the staff at the ball. The sphere changed into a thin oval and the smoke thickened into two wing-like things on what was, supposedly, the light oval's back. The little thing took flight and flapped and flapped, right, smack dap into a tree, and with a little flash and a poof, the creation was no more.

Gaia grinned from ear to ear, made a move that was even too feminine for the true owner of the staff to do and created!... a very fat, small, hippopotamus. The little animal trotted around Celtic's feet and stopped as it neared Gaia. The blond crouched and stretched out a hand in an attempt to pet the 'house hippo'. Said mini-hippo opened its little mouth as wide as it could and chopped down onto Gaia fingers. The warrior yelped and yanked his hand, with lovely hippo accessory attached, up and around. Soon the fat little hippo let go and went soaring into the majestic, and soft, mossy ground, of the forest.

The two beamed at each other. They were doing magic. They stood back to back and did a duet with their feet, arms and staffs. They pointed them out into the center of the clearing and created a very scary sight indeed. There in front of them, all made of smoke and lights, or so they prayed, was a perfect replica of the Dark Magician Girl.

Smoky, or so this illusion will be called for now, blinked pastel green eyes and rubbed her pastel pink cheeks. "Oh," she said as she looked right at the staff Celtic held, and then at Celtic himself. "Dark's staff! Oh!... Dark!" She bounded forward and leapt at the elf, who was, at this moment, about to have a heart attack, when she suddenly vanished. Celtic collapsed onto his backside and looked around.

"That was creepy as-"

"Ehem," the sound of someone clearing their throat was heard from behind. Correction, two someones. Celtic and Gaia turned their heads slowing to see who they just knew had to be behind them. They clung tightly to the staffs and tried to smile a little, but the two spell-casters looked down right pissed off.

The mages held out their right hands and jerked their fingers towards their palms. The staffs flew back into their owners hands and the thieves were left with nothing. They should have taken a lesson from Bakura.

Gaia was still grinning widely. "We did magic!" he said looked Chaos right in the eye.

"No you did not," Chaos informed him harshly.

Celtic looked a little confused and the look on his faced made Dark's heart melt. The purple-haired man walked over to his lover, still sitting on the ground and knelt to wrap his arms around him. "You see, you two don't have magical abilities. The staffs Chaos and I use are vessels that concentrate and help direct our own inner magic. Even if we aren't using them, they still house residual powers within them, and that is what you used."

"I used your magic?" Celtic asked. The idea seeming both romantic and very special. He wrapped his arms around the mage and pulled him right into his lap. "I used your gift?"

"Yes," Dark said smiling.

"Oh, enough you saps. And you!" he glared hard at the Gaia. "Touch my things again and you will be sorry!" He took a few long strides until he was practically breathing down the warriors neck. "Just because I took you inside my body does not give you any right to touch something so personal!" he hissed in the others ear before turning and storming away.

Celtic's head jerked in the direction of Gaia as the last few things were said. He sat there staring blankly and in complete shock.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

Sassy: *making out with Phantom*

Sekura: *kicking Trent*

House Hippo: *pushing on the review button with its nose*