Chapter 2 the dress

Author's Notes: Thanks to the three lovely reviews I received about chapter one and some encouragement from friends (and the fact that I basically like the way this one is going) I've decided to continue with the fic. Plus, it's plot important anyway so it wouldn't hurt. I hope my original characters continue to be well received (I dread seeing a Mary-Sue complaint, shudder, shudder) and their insanity will be further explored in this chapter.

"Lily, you've set an impossible goal honey." Avaah said sadly, gazing with distaste at the Muggle magazines in front of her.

Lily let out a frustrated sigh and buried her head in her hands. "I know. But dammit he's not going to win."

Lily was gathered in the living room of her and Cleo's flat with their girlfriends: Avaah, Max, Lolita and Alice. Ami and Misery would have joined them as well, of course, but they were off researching something for Dumbledore, something they were not at liberty to divulge, which had become a sad constant.

Cleo came in then from the shop, and dumped about a dozen more magazines into the centre of the group. Lily wrinkled her nose in distaste. No matter how many different magazines they bough, all of them featured the same cover: A potentially pretty girl with a horrible perm and circus clown makeup wearing a wedding dress with a sequined bodice and exploding with horrible lace and poofy sleeves.

It was not possible to buy a decent wedding dress in 1986.

"I'm so glad these Muggle fads haven't invaded the Wizarding world." Lolita said quietly, looking at a bride that closely resembled Bozo the clown.

"Well it wouldn't be so bad if Lily would just bite the bullet and go to a Wizarding store. But no, ever the Muggle born and must show it off." Cleo teased, knowing full well that if Lily attempted to admit defeat and go to a Wizarding shop, it was her duty as Maid of Honour to stop her.

James and Lily had made a little bet.

A few days earlier Lily had been casually looking at dresses for herself and her bridesmaids. James and Sirius had been over, and, using his prodigious ability to unconsciously push buttons, Sirius insulted not only the dresses, but Muggle fashion at large.

This was pretty rich coming from a pureblood who had denounced his heritage, owned a closet full of jeans and t-shirts, owned a motorbike and who had a boyfriend who refused to wear robes on several occasions as he thought they looked like a dress. Lily had told him so.

The argument had escalated until a bet was made. If Lily found a Muggle dress she liked then James would wear a tiki shirt to the altar. If Lily had to go to a Wizarding store, then in addition to Lily's bruised ego, James would have veto powers over any and all names of future offspring.

Cleo found the last conditions of the bet suspicious, but Lily wouldn't elaborate.

"I've got an idea!" Lolita squeaked. The girls patiently waited for her to explain, but nothing came. Then Lolita disapparated.

Used to unannounced disappearances, the girls continued desperately flicking through magazines to no avail. The dresses were all hideous.

"Maybe if you just looked for any dress, and it wouldn't even need to be a wedding dress. Like if you just bought a white one or something." Max suggested.

"We'll save that as a last resort. I don't want to give the boys a reason to bitch about fairness unless absolutely necessary." Lily answered.

"Madam Malkin made me a lovely dress for my wedding." Alice pointed out. Her eye had been caught by a particularly horrid neon green bridesmaid dress.

"I am not giving in." Lily said in a low, frightening voice. Alice didn't fully grasp the situation; she had a sane relationship with her sane husband Frank.

Alice was actually a new addition to Lily's circle of friends. Lily had followed her idiot fiance and his idiot friends into the Order of the Phoenix. She would have liked to say it had been her idea to join, but the boys had beat her to it. Damned Auror connections. Alice and Frank also being members of the Order, Lily had gotten to know them better. They'd been Gryffindors together back at school, but Alice was a year older (not to mention reasonable and modest) and they'd hadn't really bonded until recently. Though polite, Alice hadn't taken to the Misery girls very well.

Lolita surprised them all about twenty minutes later by apparating back in, right on Max's lap. "Oops, sorry Max."

"Oh it's fine. You just crushed my spleen a little, nothing severe." Max said dismissively.

Lolita plunked another large stack of magazines onto the floor. "I apparated to Dublin, Glasgow and Paris. I was even thinking of going to Germany, but there was no point. All the dresses were the same."

Lily dispiritedly regarded the magazines. "This poofy lace thing is the stupidest trend I've ever seen."

"Maybe you should just call off the whole stupid wedding." Cleo said brightly. "Getting married's overrated anyway."

Lily smiled falsely at Cleo, then continued to flick through the magazines.

"Lily, I think this is a challenge we actually aren't up to." Avaah said regrettably. "There is nothing either pretty or flattering in Muggle fashion right now."

"Oh come on! Minus Alice we're the Misery girls! We can do anything and a stupid magazine won't stop us." Max said passionately. "We're just going to have to be a little creative."

SKIPPY SKIPPY

"For once Lily, it really isn't your ass that makes your ass look big." Cleo stated.

"I know!" Lily exclaimed, in poor spirits. Cleo, Lily and Avaah were making a circuit of the bridal shops and department stores. They'd given up on the magazines, but thought maybe the dresses would look better in person. Besides, Lily was one of the prettiest witches they knew. Sure, she had some ghetto booty (AN-yes I realize this phrase was not popular in 1986), but she was also rather busty, which made for a nice hour glass figure.

"If these dresses can't work on you then I'm screwed for my wedding." Avaah announced. She'd been dating Jason since her fourth year at Hogwarts. They were all eagerly awaiting a ring any day now. Five years of relationship bliss constituted a wedding to them.

"Shut up Avaah, you're beautiful." Lily and Cleo snapped.

"Alright." Avaah said chipperly.

"See, this is why weddings are bullshit. I'll never have to go through this hell." Cleo stated smugly.

Lily lifted the enormous skirt of her dress and waded towards the fitting room. "You're never going to marry Cleo?"

"Never. You know that." Cleo said with a scowl.

"Not even if Sevvy proposes?" Avaah asked, batting her eyes at Cleo.

"First of all," Cleo said scathingly. "Sev would never propose. This is because, secondly, he knows marriage is a crock of shit too."

Lily and Avaah were snickering. "I noticed love wasn't a reason there. Do you lo-o-o-o-o-o-o-vah him?" Lily asked.

"I do not. He doesn't love me. Love isn't real, that's why marriage is shit." Cleo snapped.

Lily came out of the fitting room to try another obnoxious dress. "Still…you two are awfully cute together. Would you say yes if he did propose?"

"It doesn't matter because he won't." Cleo hissed, eyes narrowed.

"I think she wo-ould." Avaah declared in a sing-song voice.

"That's so cute! By the time Sev proposes, Jason would too and you girls can have a double wedding!" Lily suggested loudly.

Cleo's face had turned a nasty shade of red.

"We need to start pressuring Sevvy. Take him ring shopping." Avaah suggested.

"You will not." Cleo said, her voice now very low and threatening. Avaah and Lily decided to break it off there, because teasing Cleo was risky to begin with, let alone when she was on edge over Lily and James' wedding. She still hadn't recovered entirely from the realization that her future surrogate nephews and/or nieces would have that idiot's genes mixed in with Lily's.

Lily tried on a few more dresses, to no avail. They left in poor spirits.

"Lily, if you had one made for you? By a Muggle…?" Avaah suggested.

"That's not a bad idea…" Lily's voice trailed off.

They apparated back to the flat and Lily began flicking through the phone book.

MEANWHILE

Lolita, Max and Ami were sitting in Max's basement, the new headquarters for SPARD (students for the protection and right s of dragons). They'd started the organization back in Hogwarts when they realized Dumbledore had invented twelve different uses for dragon's blood. The thoughts of the experiments he must have performed to find twelve uses screamed of animal cruelty to the girls. Though they'd gotten little support from their peers, Hagrid had been very enthusiastic about SPARD. Just because they'd graduated, they refused to let it die, and were now trying to take it to a national level.

They were up to eighteen members. When you counted the kids they'd bullied into joining while at school.

They were wrapping up another meeting when the discussion turned to Lily's dress. Ami was in the dark about it, and Max and Lolita had to fill her in on the bet.

"She left something as important as her dress up to a bet?" Ami said in disbelief. Lily was lax about her clothing, but she figured even Lily would care about what her dress looked like for her wedding.

"That's sorta the issue. She doesn't want to give in but she doesn't want to have to wear one of these things to her wedding. We're stumped." Max explained.

"Well why don't you just buy a dress and then get it altered? Or did James and Sirius say you couldn't do that?" Ami asked.

Max and Lolita's eyes widened. "Ami you're a genius!" Max exclaimed, while Lolita squeed and hugged her. They immediately ran to the fireplace to tell Lily about Ami's idea.

AT THE FLAT...

"Where's the phone book?" Lily screeched, digging through the cabinet she was sure she'd stuck the phone book in.

"Do you need a book to operate a phone?" Avaah asked.

"Yeah…I don't think I know what that is." Cleo said, looking perplexed.

"It's got numbers in it, for people in town and more importantly local shops. There should be a section with business listings for dress makers." Lily explained.

"What's it look like?" Avaah asked, now searching the flat for this amazing sounding book.

"It's pretty thick, cheap paper…blue and black cover with ads on it." Lily explained. Cleo's eyes went wide, then a guilty look crossed her face. Lily took notice. "Cleo…what did you do to the phone book?"

"I was leaning on it when I painted my nails and I spilled polish all over it. I thought it was junk mail or something since it was delivered and I chucked it. I'm sorry honey." Cleo said with a convincing pout.

Lily would have ripped into her, but Lolita's head popped into the fireplace then. Lolita quickly explained Ami's brilliant (and obvious) idea. The girls ooed impressively.

SKIPPY SKIPPY...

"That'll do." Cleo said decisively.

Lily and Cleo stepped back to admire their handwork. They'd been up all night sewing and it had paid off.

The dress had started out no different from the nightmare gowns they'd seen thus far. After removing sequins, yards of tuille and layers and layers of lace, it had started to look decent. There was nothing to be done for the poofy sleeves, so they just ripped them right off. It was going to be a summer wedding anyway. It was a good thing Lily had simple tastes in clothing because the girls weren't all that experienced as seamstresses. They did manage to make a pretty dress out of it though.

Underneath all the shinies and the material was a very lovely white dress in a soft, satin-like material. It fitted to Lily's curves very nicely once they removed the tuille and the extra poofy skirts. They'd taken some of the extra material and sewn it to the bottom so it made a train. Then Cleo had taken a few more scraps and shredded them into long ribbons. She wrapped them around Lily's arms to give a bit more decoration. The effect had been simple but stunning.

"Do you think Jeremy and Black will accept this?" Cleo asked.

"Who cares. I have an amazing wedding dress." Lily said stupidly. "Cleo I'm so excited! This dress looks perfect, and I have the pretty ring-" She accentuated this by holding out her hand and gazing happily at her engagement ring. "And James is going to wear a tiki shirt! It'll be great!"

"You know, most girls wouldn't want their husbands to tie the knot in a tiki shirt. They'd go for a tux or something, right?" Cleo asked.

"Most likely. I'm not like most girls. My wedding's going to be unique." Lily stated.

"Well I think you've already made sure of that." Cleo answered.

TBC

A/N I think the next chapter's going to deal with the future in-laws. Prepare to meet Anja and Nicholas Evans and Meryl and Mustachio Potter. and don't worry, James, Sirius, Remus and Sev will be coming back. This chapter was unusually girly for me, but I didn't really know how else to deal with the subject of a wedding dress. It's not really a guy thing.