Hey everybody! Just thought I'd say a few things before I start. The song
in this chapter is "here Without You" by Three Doors Down.
Okay I can't figure out how to get italics on Fanfiction.net, so everything
in *** *** is a flashback, and the lines around it is the song. If anyone
could clue me in on how to work the italics it would be greatly
appreciated.
Since the last chapter was short and had no Liason I decided to make this
one a bit longer and have it be complete Liason. Aren't I a sweetheart? I'd
wait and read the chapter before you answer that question *que doom music*
Just read the chapter all ready!
***
Jason pulled away from Liz abruptly. What were they doing. She was recently divorced. He was engaged. He was supposed to looking for Carly, not falling back in love with Liz. Was that what was happening? He couldn't be. He was with Courtney, and he if he cheated on her he would become everything he hated. No matter how much he wanted to keep Liz in his arms he had to stop this before it went any further. He looked down at Liz. Her lips were swollen, and her eyes were filled with desire. He had to stop this very fast.
He ran his hands through his wet hair.
The look in Liz's eyes that was full of desire was replaced with a look of hurt. He wanted to shot himself for putting that look in her eyes. "What's wrong Jason?"
"We can't do this Liz. There are other people involved. If it was just us then maybe it could be different, but we're not under different circumstances."
Liz looked at the battle he was wrestling within himself. This was about Courtney, about Carly, about the life he'd left to come out here, the life that no longer included her.
"So what I'm just supposed to just stand by and watch you give up on something we both want?" she cried out in indignation. She was tired of watching. She's lost him before by just watching. She couldn't do that again, not without a fight.
"Yes," he sighed. He pulled away further from her in the water, as if the distance would help clear his head. He couldn't deny her much longer if he could continue to smell her sweet scent. See the water droplets sit on her eyelashes. Feel the heat coming from her lips.
A defeated laugh came from Liz's lips, "So you're just giving up?"
Anger fueled Jason's veins. Didn't she understand how hard this was for him? He was trying to do the right thing. Stand by his responsibilities, and spare her from the hurt that they would eventually run into. "What do you I'm giving up? This isn't real Liz! We're lost in some tropical island. We're alone, and here with have no responsibilities. We don't have to live our lives. We can just give into what we want. But what will come of it? Nothing! Because we still have lives to get back to, lives that don't include the other. We've tried this before Liz, countless times, and it never works out," he paused to see the tears form in Liz's eyes. He wanted to stop them but knew he had to get this all out, "I can't put myself through that. I can't stand to put you through that."
Liz looked up at him, tears shamelessly streaming down her face. She nodded, and swallowed her anger. She knew he didn't want to do this, but he had said it anyways. He was the man she's loved since she saw him at Jake's those many years ago, and the man she'd fallen in love was now standing before her telling her they had no future. Her tears were beginning to engulf her. She looked up to see his own flowing down his face.
He wanted her to say something, he needed her to. She just stood there frozen. When had their roles been reversed? "Liz," She stopped him, and swam away. With each stroke, Jason felt his heart break a little more. He gave into his misery, and sank to his knees once he was on shore. Tears streaked his cheeks. Damn Courtney, damn Alcazar, damn his self-control, ethics and his truths.
The stars had come out, and the fire was at a full force once the night sky had push the sun to sleep. Liz hadn't spoken to Jason since their confrontation. He hadn't tried to push her. Knowing Liz she needed to come around on her own. He looked across the flames, and saw her face. She was far away in every sense of the term. He couldn't keep looking at her like that. He was slowly losing his mind.
"I'm going to go to sleep. I'll make a pallet over by the water. Just to give you some privacy. Will you be okay?" Jason asked softly.
She nodded, "Yeah"
He smiled sadly, and walked away.
A hundred days had made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
Liz looked into the fire. They'd come so close. Tears threatened to flow against her. Her eyes followed the path that Jason had taken. How did they move on from this?
A thousand lights had made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
Jason could hear her laugh in his head. She loved the rides they'd take. The wind in her hair, and her worries were gone. She was free, and he could hear it in her laugh.
***I want to show you how I get away. You want to go for a ride?
Where?
Nowhere.***
But all the miles had separate They disappeared now when I'm dreaming of your face I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
*** No, no, no, no, no. This painting belongs on the wall of the man who taught me to see the wind in the first place.
I'd like that.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams And tonight it's only you and me The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
***Hey. Oh, this is perfect.
What is?
Running into you. Maybe it's a sign.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
*** Would you do something for me?
Sure.
Dance with me.***
And tonight girl it's only you and me Everything I know, and anywhere I go It gets hard but it won't take away my love
*** Nothing. Nothing's going to change unless I go. There are people that I care about who are hurting every day because of me.
These people -- am I one of them?
Yes.
No, you're wrong. I don't hurt because of you, Jason. I would hurt without you.*** And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done it get hard but it won't take away my love I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
***Now, you know that's not the point. If someone wants me dead, you' my friend, you're in the line of fire.
But what if that's a chance I want to take?
I won't.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
*** You don't have to be here. We can go anywhere.
Run way from everything? Never look back?
Or look back when you're ready. Come back here because you want to, not because you feel obligated to stay.
This is my life.
It doesn't have to be***
And tonight girl it's only you and me I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
*** What do you want?
I want you.***
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams But tonight girl it's only you and me
*** Sorry it's just that this story needed some angst, and I've never written angst before. I wanted to see if I was any good at it,( . I love that song, and I just had to incorporate it somehow.( Please Review! I have this new found inspiration to write, and without feedback the inspiration will go away, and you'll have to wait weeks before you get another chapter. You don't want that do you?(
***
Jason pulled away from Liz abruptly. What were they doing. She was recently divorced. He was engaged. He was supposed to looking for Carly, not falling back in love with Liz. Was that what was happening? He couldn't be. He was with Courtney, and he if he cheated on her he would become everything he hated. No matter how much he wanted to keep Liz in his arms he had to stop this before it went any further. He looked down at Liz. Her lips were swollen, and her eyes were filled with desire. He had to stop this very fast.
He ran his hands through his wet hair.
The look in Liz's eyes that was full of desire was replaced with a look of hurt. He wanted to shot himself for putting that look in her eyes. "What's wrong Jason?"
"We can't do this Liz. There are other people involved. If it was just us then maybe it could be different, but we're not under different circumstances."
Liz looked at the battle he was wrestling within himself. This was about Courtney, about Carly, about the life he'd left to come out here, the life that no longer included her.
"So what I'm just supposed to just stand by and watch you give up on something we both want?" she cried out in indignation. She was tired of watching. She's lost him before by just watching. She couldn't do that again, not without a fight.
"Yes," he sighed. He pulled away further from her in the water, as if the distance would help clear his head. He couldn't deny her much longer if he could continue to smell her sweet scent. See the water droplets sit on her eyelashes. Feel the heat coming from her lips.
A defeated laugh came from Liz's lips, "So you're just giving up?"
Anger fueled Jason's veins. Didn't she understand how hard this was for him? He was trying to do the right thing. Stand by his responsibilities, and spare her from the hurt that they would eventually run into. "What do you I'm giving up? This isn't real Liz! We're lost in some tropical island. We're alone, and here with have no responsibilities. We don't have to live our lives. We can just give into what we want. But what will come of it? Nothing! Because we still have lives to get back to, lives that don't include the other. We've tried this before Liz, countless times, and it never works out," he paused to see the tears form in Liz's eyes. He wanted to stop them but knew he had to get this all out, "I can't put myself through that. I can't stand to put you through that."
Liz looked up at him, tears shamelessly streaming down her face. She nodded, and swallowed her anger. She knew he didn't want to do this, but he had said it anyways. He was the man she's loved since she saw him at Jake's those many years ago, and the man she'd fallen in love was now standing before her telling her they had no future. Her tears were beginning to engulf her. She looked up to see his own flowing down his face.
He wanted her to say something, he needed her to. She just stood there frozen. When had their roles been reversed? "Liz," She stopped him, and swam away. With each stroke, Jason felt his heart break a little more. He gave into his misery, and sank to his knees once he was on shore. Tears streaked his cheeks. Damn Courtney, damn Alcazar, damn his self-control, ethics and his truths.
The stars had come out, and the fire was at a full force once the night sky had push the sun to sleep. Liz hadn't spoken to Jason since their confrontation. He hadn't tried to push her. Knowing Liz she needed to come around on her own. He looked across the flames, and saw her face. She was far away in every sense of the term. He couldn't keep looking at her like that. He was slowly losing his mind.
"I'm going to go to sleep. I'll make a pallet over by the water. Just to give you some privacy. Will you be okay?" Jason asked softly.
She nodded, "Yeah"
He smiled sadly, and walked away.
A hundred days had made me older
Since the last time that I saw your pretty face
Liz looked into the fire. They'd come so close. Tears threatened to flow against her. Her eyes followed the path that Jason had taken. How did they move on from this?
A thousand lights had made me colder
And I don't think I can look at this the same
Jason could hear her laugh in his head. She loved the rides they'd take. The wind in her hair, and her worries were gone. She was free, and he could hear it in her laugh.
***I want to show you how I get away. You want to go for a ride?
Where?
Nowhere.***
But all the miles had separate They disappeared now when I'm dreaming of your face I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
*** No, no, no, no, no. This painting belongs on the wall of the man who taught me to see the wind in the first place.
I'd like that.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams And tonight it's only you and me The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello I hear this life is overrated but I hope it gets better as we go I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
***Hey. Oh, this is perfect.
What is?
Running into you. Maybe it's a sign.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
*** Would you do something for me?
Sure.
Dance with me.***
And tonight girl it's only you and me Everything I know, and anywhere I go It gets hard but it won't take away my love
*** Nothing. Nothing's going to change unless I go. There are people that I care about who are hurting every day because of me.
These people -- am I one of them?
Yes.
No, you're wrong. I don't hurt because of you, Jason. I would hurt without you.*** And when the last one falls, when it's all said and done it get hard but it won't take away my love I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
***Now, you know that's not the point. If someone wants me dead, you' my friend, you're in the line of fire.
But what if that's a chance I want to take?
I won't.***
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
*** You don't have to be here. We can go anywhere.
Run way from everything? Never look back?
Or look back when you're ready. Come back here because you want to, not because you feel obligated to stay.
This is my life.
It doesn't have to be***
And tonight girl it's only you and me I'm here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
*** What do you want?
I want you.***
I'm here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams But tonight girl it's only you and me
*** Sorry it's just that this story needed some angst, and I've never written angst before. I wanted to see if I was any good at it,( . I love that song, and I just had to incorporate it somehow.( Please Review! I have this new found inspiration to write, and without feedback the inspiration will go away, and you'll have to wait weeks before you get another chapter. You don't want that do you?(