In the Way
By Dimantrien
"The greatest mistake you can make in this life is to be continually fearing you will make one."
~Elbert Green Hubbard
A/N ~ Sorry for being late…school has been really hectic this month…
Chapter 6: When Nothing is Left
The sound of bed sheets rustling and audible whimpering woke Chloe up. She was still half-asleep, but she was fairly certain that the sounds were coming from Lily's bed. "Lily, are you okay?" she called out drowsily, pushing open one of the curtains around her bed with a heavy arm.
She listened for a few moments, hearing nothing but silence. Unconsciously, she let the hangings drape down again and her eyes closed; she turned over and was soon fast asleep again. The next morning, she woke up, remembering nothing of the incident. Or maybe she thought it was a dream. Either way, she didn't mention it to Lily when they went down for breakfast.
The redhead had another fight with James Potter that morning. It was starting to become a regular event that the students enjoyed watching immensely, even though they fought about the pettiest and most ridiculous things. Thankfully, it was still quite early, and there were only a few witnesses, including both parties' friends.
"Hey, Evans," James greeted as he pulled up a chair across Lily. He hadn't taken caution to know if she was still in a bad mood with him (not that she ever wasn't) because of his query yesterday about her love life, but he clearly decided that it was time to move on and make her irritated in another way.
"How many times will it take you to realize that I do not want you in my presence?" Lily snapped. She was, indeed, in a particularly foul mood, not because of the scene in the common room, but because of another fresh bout of being forced to walk down memory lane in her dreams.
James just gave her his trademark smirk, which he reserved for her whenever she gave him a scathing reply. "I've already realized that ages ago, hon. If I didn't, then why would I keep dropping by?"
"Go away, Potter. I have no time for your cynical jests today," Lily said icily, giving him a glare that was just as cold.
"When have you ever?" James shot back, exasperating Lily even further by grabbing a piece of toast which she had buttered and gobbling it up.
Nami glanced at James, then at Lily, who was looking murderous. "Maybe you should go, James," she suggested with a sigh. She glanced at Chloe, who was surprisingly ignoring James and was being true to her self-made vow.
James sat up straighter. "Hey, I've got—"
"—a right to sit wherever you want on the Gryffindor table, blah, blah, blah. I'm just trying to help you, because if you haven't noticed, which is highly likely, Lily isn't in such jovial spirits this morning, and would be willing to hex you here and now if you don't skedaddle in the next five seconds." Nami interjected, rolling her eyes at James's predictable response.
"Bring it on, then," James replied defiantly, giving Lily a calculating stare.
"The teachers are here," Chloe hissed in warning, and sure enough, they saw the teachers filing into their seats at the High Table.
"So? Why, is Evans here going to run to the teachers for help?"
Lily whipped out her wand, beyond the point of caring whether or not the professors saw her, and across her she saw James do the same.
Nami kept an eye trained on the teachers. "Are you two crazy?! McGonagall is right there!"
Both James and Lily opened their mouths to answer. "So wha—"
"So if you start a duel right in her face, she'll make you do a detention together, like she did with me and Black," Nami retorted, and they immediately shoved their wands into their pockets.
"A detention with Potter, Merlin that'd be a nightmare," Lily said aloud in disgust.
"I'll be damned if I get stuck in detention with Evans, she'll probably moan and groan about getting punished for the first time in her whole perfect existence," James commented in the same tone.
"If I did then it would've been your fault!" Lily retaliated, her voice rising.
"Why would it be my fault? You're the one who's raring to go into a jinxing frenzy!" James stood up, glaring at her.
Lily mirrored his move, rising from her seat so fast she knocked her chair over. "Well, I wouldn't have gotten the urge to hex you if you just stayed on your side of the table!"
"It isn't against the rules to sit here! And you were the one who was in such a violent mood the moment I greeted you!"
"The only time you'd come greet me is when you're trying to pick a fight, which is what you were obviously doing just now!"
Chloe sighed. "Guys, will you just stop yelling and break it up? Nami, help me out here," she turned to her friend but was met only with an empty seat. The petty argument between Lily and James had reminded her about her own score to settle with Sirius, and she had run off to give him a piece of her mind. Chloe gave up trying to pacify her redheaded friend, starting to become a little annoyed with James herself. Maybe getting over him would be easier than she had thought.
James and Lily were yelling at the top of their lungs now, and everyone, as usual, turned to watch. Remus and Peter found the fight an amusing follow-up to Padfoot's antics yesterday. Chloe dropped her head onto the table in defeat as a peeved Professor McGonagall strolled over to them to put things back in order.
In the midst of the confusion, no one noticed Sirius Black being dragged out of the Hall by an Oriental girl, who looked, if possible, more furious than the hot-tempered Lily Evans herself.
*****
"Explain yourself."
These two words were said with such coldness that Sirius could literally feel himself shivering. He knew exactly why Nami was mad at him—then again, was there ever any moment when she didn't feel like clawing his eyes out? Never, except maybe last night, which was why they were here, in the Quidditch pitch, in the first place…
"I—er," Sirius said rather unintelligently. How was he supposed to explain that he had done his detention without mentioning that he could turn into an enormous, shaggy black dog? It was her fault; she was the one who ran into him and made him go all sappy when he was in dog form…just because he couldn't control himself from getting a pat on the head, even by her, the most insensitive and sadistic female alive—
Nami slowly took her wand out of her pocket, obviously savoring the fact that Sirius knew that she could hex him any second, and he would be rendered completely helpless, as she still had his wand with her. "I can't hear you saying anything in your defense," she taunted, twirling her wand with her two hands, smirking at him.
Sirius stood up straighter, suddenly feeling a wave of defiance coming over him. This was so unfair—Nami was calling the shots, and he didn't even do anything wrong in the first place. Okay, so technically it was his fault for throwing a can full of worms at her in the middle of detention, but still… He sighed inwardly, trying to figure out a way to get out of this alive. "I did do my share in the detention," he found himself saying.
The girl in front of him gave him a skeptic and exasperated glare. "Oh, you did? Because I went to Hagrid's hut this morning, and he said you didn't show up all night! He looked a little confused that you would just abandon detention like that, and he even backed you up yesterday. Not that I believed him, since it's you we're talking about."
"I'm not lying. You saw…Snuffles…in the forest, didn't you?" Sirius asked stonily. Damn Prongs for making up that name…
"Yeah, so?" Nami said, her voice faltering a little, as she didn't expect that Sirius would actually have an excuse.
"Well, did you ever stop to wonder why he had a bouquet of golden flowers in his mouth, or did you just assume that he was going on a date?" Sirius said mockingly, staring her down.
Satisfactorily enough for him, Nami wasn't looking too confident right now. "I—you mean, you actually—"
"I gave him the flowers. Beats me why he was in the forest in the first place, but the fact is that I did stumble around in the dark looking for the damned things, so the hexes you would like to unleash on me will be unfortunately unnecessary." It was his turn to smirk at her. Ha. Let her try to act all smug now…
"Actually, I think they still will be," Nami replied, grinning wickedly at him. "Here, catch." She tossed his wand at him, and he caught it, confused and for the moment off his guard. "Slithro Treneir," she said, waving her wand in a complicated fashion.
"What are you—" Before Sirius could utter another word, he could feel his hair, his beloved hair, transfiguring into something—or more appropriately, a lot of things—alive and writhing. He had no idea what she had done yet, but he quickly got into a dueling stance, running through his mind for a perfect retaliatory hex. Nami must have sensed this, for she suddenly raised her wand again.
"Petrificus Ephemeralus!"
Sirius felt himself becoming immobile as she cast the Temporary Full-Body Bind on him, though he couldn't for the life of him figure out why she didn't just use the Petrificus Totalus incantation, which was more appropriate if you wanted your opponent to just lie down there vulnerably, all ready to be hexed and gift-wrapped for your convenience.
As he lay down on the grass, cursing himself inwardly for moving too slowly and giving Nami the most withering glare he could muster, Nami walked toward him and leaned over him so that their noses were barely two inches apart. "That's for telling me that I should've been put in Slytherin, and for that little prank you pulled in the Forbidden Forest," she said in a very, very quiet voice. Sirius could feel her breath on his face and the way she stared into his eyes, like she was boring holes into them. She pulled herself back up into a standing position, towering over his form.
"Incantato Ennervatum," she whispered, and Sirius could feel his hair, or what she had transfigured it into (which had frozen up too when she cast the Body Bind curse on him), starting to writhe again. Nami took out a mirror from her pocket and enlarged it, directing the reflective surface right at Sirius's face so he could view the damage that she had done.
Snakes. Hundreds of multi-colored, spaghetti-thin hissing snakes were attached to his scalp, their tiny fangs snapping and dripping what looked horribly like real venom.
"Here, you might want this," Nami offered, putting a vividly colored mask over his face that served the purpose of preventing his "hair" from biting him. It had holes for the eyes, nose and mouth, and was effective in protecting him, but he looked utterly ridiculous. Nami smiled saccharinely at him, her eyes dancing amusedly. "See, I do have a heart, and the Body Bind will wear off after ten more minutes, if you were wondering about that. And don't even try to get back at me because I was just getting back at you… I'm already being charitable, Black; don't try to break that, or you'll find yourself with more than just snakes for hair."
She turned around and walked away, looking back at him for a moment and tauntingly waving goodbye before disappearing at the end of the pitch.
Sirius couldn't find himself getting the urge to throw insults at her retreating back, even if he really couldn't because the Body Bind prevented him from moving his mouth. He found himself thinking about her twinkling eyes and the way they looked friendly for a split-second, like they had yesterday, when he was in his dog form. He also found himself thinking about the fact that Nami Tzu never ignored an opportunity to experiment with different hexes by using him as a guinea pig—and that attitude was something they mutually agreed to. So why didn't she take advantage of the situation?
He thought deeply about these things (which made him worry about his own mental health) in the ten minutes that he waited for the Body Bind to wear off. He finally stopped when he realized he caught himself considering making up with Nami after five years of being at war with each other. Despite his inner self-disgusted reprimands about this suggestion, he admitted to himself that life would be so much easier if they were on much friendlier terms. And no, the fact that she had a nice smile and actually had an affable side to her had nothing to do with it… Really, it didn't.
Sirius sighed. He needed to talk to James.
*****
Unfortunately for Sirius, James wasn't in the frame of mind to act like the voice of reason, as the bespectacled boy himself had his own problems to deal with.
Thankfully, McGonagall was in a good mood that morning and settled for kicking James and Lily out of the Great Hall instead of doing detention, for inappropriate and uncouth yelling in the presence of two hundred people. McGonagall realized that this was not the most effective of plans, though, as James and Lily found it convenient to just continue their shouting match in the entrance hall, within hearing range of the whole Hogwarts population who was eating breakfast. Thus, at present, they were standing outside the front doors to the castle, yelling themselves hoarse, unable to just hex each other and be done with it (McGonagall had confiscated their wands).
This was how Remus found them when he went outside to check if they'd killed each other with their bare hands already, and he shot Cheering Charms at them, just to be safe. Then he dragged a cheerful James away, leaving Lily wondering cheerfully why she was cheerfully standing out in the cold.
"Hey, Lil! What're you doing out here?" Nami called as she got back to the castle from dealing with Sirius.
Lily waved jovially at her. "Oh, hello! I don't know exactly why I'm out here, but it's a wonderful morning, isn't it?" she said in cheery tones, which left Nami wondering if James Potter managed to get a few of her screws loose while they were fighting.
"Lily, it's about to rain," Nami pointed out, looking up at the darkening sky.
"Rain is lovely! Most people feel quite sad and sentimental when raindrops fall heavily from the sky, but they should realize that the rain does wonderful things for nature! It cleanses the air and leaves a fresh feeling after it passes!" Lily smiled at her friend, whose eyes suddenly lit up.
"Oh—oh, I get it; you've been caught by a Cheering Charm, haven't you?"
Lily merely continued to smile and took Nami's hand, dragging her down the front steps. "Come! Let us enjoy the rain—"
"Oh no we won't! I'm not taking any advice from a person who ends all her sentences with an exclamation point…" Nami muttered, stopping and pulling Lily back to the refuge the castle provided them.
"I suppose staying inside would be fairly comfortable and warm," Lily reasoned merrily, changing course and bouncing up the steps and into the castle.
"God bless us when the charm fades and you come back to being a homicidal rampaging anti-Potter maniac," Nami said aloud, not fazing Lily in the least.
Lily waited for her as she passed through the enormous double doors. "Where's Sirius? I saw you accompanying him out of the Great Hall five minutes ago."
"Accompanying? Er—if you say so," Nami replied, smirking inwardly. Although she did wonder how Lily could have possibly witnessed her escape when the redhead was too busy exchanging insults with James.
"So, where is he?" Lily pressed. The effects of the charm must have made her forget about any grudges that people had on other people.
Nami took a moment to respond, as she was busy staring at the rain that had started to fall from the sky in buckets, and at the flashes of lightning that accentuated it. "He's just, uh, enjoying the rain," she answered innocently.
Lily looked happy (well, that was what the Cheering Charm was for, wasn't it?) and commented, "Oh, why ever didn't we join him?"
Because we aren't tied down by a Body Bind curse and we've got the wits to stay inside, away from that terrible storm? Nami thought sarcastically, glancing at Lily, who was staring with glassy eyes out the window. Er…make that 'at least one of us has got the wits to stay inside and drag the other along with her.' "I think he's got enough company with him," she responded dryly, recalling the Medusa hair that she had given him.
They went back to Gryffindor tower and it was then that the Cheering Charm started to fade…
"Where's Potter?" Lily asked, just as Nami was giving the password to the Fat Lady.
"Blue cheese—why would you be looking for him?" Nami climbed over the portrait hole and waited for Lily to do the same.
"I can't recall, oh, yes, I made a mental note to transfigure him into a cockroach and step on him," Lily replied, startling Nami, who thought that she still had the Cheering Charm on her.
Nami scanned the common room, where a few third years were working on Divination assignments (she figured that by the way they kept downing cups of tea and staring at the dregs, muttering and cursing). "Well, he's not here. And anyway, McGonagall's got your wand, right? You can't do anything about it until she decides that you're calm enough not to murder the guy."
"I can just borrow your wand. It won't be as good, but if that'll at least make him mutate into a bug-human thing, then that would do," Lily said matter-of-factly.
Nami sighed. "I think you should go lie down for a while," she said, pushing Lily up the girls' dormitory, ignoring her friend's token protests.
It was a good thing she did that, because right as they disappeared up the staircase, James, Remus, Peter and what looked like a male Gorgon (you know, what you call Medusa and her two other snake-haired sisters) with a brightly colored mask emerged through the portrait hole.
Remus and Peter cracked up whenever they glanced at their weird companion (the third years looked warily at him) and James looked grumpy. Sirius (Gorgon guy) made a beeline toward the third years, who shrieked and scattered their tea leaves and cups everywhere before running to the safety of the dorms.
"Really, Padfoot, there was no need to scare them," Remus remarked, rolling his eyes at his friend's juvenile antics.
"Hey, if I'm gonna be stuck looking like this, I might as well make the best out of it," Sirius answered defensively, adjusting his mask. They had been unable to find a countercurse for Nami's spell and it was Remus who suggested that maybe it would revert back to normal after a few hours. So now Sirius was stuck with snake hair for possibly the rest of the day (he hoped it wouldn't last all week).
"Maybe if you apologized to her, she'd change it back," Peter piped up.
"Me? Apologize to her? Are you out of your mind, Wormtail?" Sirius exclaimed. Peter paled and cowered, muttering almost incoherently "It was only a suggestion."
But as they ascended the stairs to the boys' dorm, Sirius couldn't help wondering if maybe, for once, he should heed Peter's advice.
*****
James sulked inside their dormitory room all afternoon. He and the rest of the marauders ate lunch in the kitchens—Sirius said that he didn't want any interaction with the rest of the student body until his hair was restored, and James didn't feel like having another row with Lily. He had tried everything to think about anything else but that temperamental girl—he'd done all his homework, made fun of Sirius's hair, and even read the Daily Prophet (which he only did when he was extremely bored or when there was actually something newsworthy going on). That last one did help distract him a little though, because of the news about a Dark wizard who was coming into power and was wreaking havoc in the Muggle world. James vaguely remembered the name, Voldemort, and he recalled feeling a surge of hatred for the bastard, but that only led him in reminding himself that he also hated a certain redhead, and now he was back to square one.
Peter and Remus had left the room thirty minutes ago, unable to tolerate James and Sirius's whining any further. That meant that both were left to their thoughts, as they weren't in a particularly talkative mood, and were wrapped in their own woes.
Too many things were on James's mind, and he hated the fact that all of them had something to do with Lily Evans. He hated how she annoyed him even if she wasn't present. She was supposed to be predictable, like any ordinary perfectionist should be. But then she had to act all weird last night, making him feel like he was the scum of the earth for asking her why she hadn't dated anyone in school. It was just a question. A little on the personal side, but still, it wasn't like a popular girl like Lily could keep a fact like having a boyfriend a secret from her adoring fans. And non-fans.
"What are you thinking, mate?" Sirius spoke up suddenly, causing James to sit up from his position on his bed.
James was still slightly inclined to laugh at the state of Sirius's hair, which (he thought) was good as it somehow made him forget about his weird thoughts about Lily. Unfortunately, Sirius didn't seem to share his humor.
"This isn't my fault, you know," Sirius said irritably when James tried to stifle a snigger.
"It was your fault. You pulled a prank on her first, remember?" James felt himself starting to lighten up, and Sirius's reaction made it all the better for him.
Sirius scowled, though James couldn't see it, as he still had his mask on. "Why are we talking about me anyway? I asked you about you first."
James paused, not wanting to elaborate on his thoughts. He already thought to himself that he was probably going insane for not thinking about anything but the girl he held contempt for more than anybody…
"You're thinking about Lily, aren't you?" Sirius said knowingly with an air of triumph.
"What? I wasn't—" James started to say vehemently, but Sirius cut him off.
"Tut, tut, my dear Prongs, don't try to deny it to yourself," Sirius mock-reprimanded, looking like he too was starting to feel more animated by the second. "I knew it. I knew you liked her…"
"I do not like her, no matter how many times you try to insist upon it," James said hotly, thinking that his best friend had finally cracked.
Sirius remained adamant about his newfound conclusion, however, which didn't help James one bit. "Sure you do. You suddenly took notice of her this school year, took pleasure in teasing her and making her mad so that she'd draw her attention to you, and even asked her if she had a boyfriend," he said as he counted off the reasons on his fingers. "Oh, and obsessing about her is definitely a big point."
"I am not obsessing about her. And I suppose you think that my doing everything I could to make her lose it in front of everyone is a way to make her fall madly in love with me?" James retorted sarcastically.
His best friend appeared thoughtful for a moment (at least James thought he was, he couldn't determine Sirius's emotions at the moment unless he scrutinized his movements). "That could work. Don't forget, there's a thin line between love and—"
James groaned. "I am not having this conversation again." Before Sirius could utter another remark, he added, "I don't think I'm the one with the problem anyway. What's up with you and Nami Tzu, Padfoot? Seems like you're starting to get soft with her because of Snuffles…"
Sirius sat up straight, trying to look dignified. "Going soft? I'm going to get back at her as soon as I get rid of this," he said, gesturing carelessly at the snakes piled like spaghetti upon his head.
"You've had a lot of opportunities to get back at her after you were freed from the Body Bind. Normally you'd seek out revenge as soon as humanly possible," James pointed out, smirking as he turned the tables. Now Sirius was the one being flustered.
"I—she—I was just being philanthropic. Returning the favor. She could have murdered me then and there when I was completely under her power but she didn't. That's a major change—practically a miracle for her, and you know it." Sirius stared back at him haughtily as if challenging him to contradict his point.
James shook his head and sighed mockingly. "Tut, tut, my dear Padfoot, don't try to deny it to yourself," he chastised, repeating Sirius's words.
Sirius was unable to think of a suitable comeback and was thoroughly annoyed because of this. "I think my Arithmancy book is calling my name," he said, opting for an escape from the conversation.
"Are you sure it's not Nami? Listen, can't you hear her? Snuffles? Snuuufffflllles, where are you?" James laughed.
Sirius threw his copy of Numerology and Grammatica at him.
*****
Lily was trying (and failing) to start her Charms essay. It irritated her to no end, as she usually excelled in Charms (in all her subjects, for that matter) and now she couldn't even think of how to start. All she had managed to scribble down, in angry, jagged scrawls, were five words written over and over again.
James Potter is a prat.
James Potter is a prat.
James Potter is a prat.
She groaned and wondered if James had managed to aim a hex at her that would make her think about him nonstop, all for the cause of driving her crazy. It probably already did.
Mistakes. Why did there have to be so many mistakes? She wouldn't have any problems like this if she didn't let James provoke her from the start. Why did he have to pick her? Why did he have to make her life harder than it already was? Sure, on the surface, people would give anything to have her life. But they had no idea what she had been through. What she was really like. And that part of her was slowly escaping through the crack that James had made in her armor.
James Potter is a prat.
*****
James Potter, who didn't think himself a prat, sat alone in his dormitory room, wishing he had a Pensieve to siphon away all the thoughts in his head related to Lily Evans.
He admitted to himself that he had grown curious as to what made Lily tick. He knew she was hiding something that even her closest friends in school didn't know about, and he wanted to know what it was. That was why he kept tormenting her (in a shallow sense), long after he had proven that she wasn't perfect, that underneath that cool and unflappable exterior, there was a fiery temper that, when lost completely, would make others scared for their lives.
Rather than being annoyed at her, he was starting to feel sympathy for the redhead. And that was enough to scare him. Why should he feel any sympathy for the one person with whom he had a yelling match with every single day? He had half a mind then, when he had this realization, to hunt her down and have an argument with her again, just to prove that he was thinking wrong.
But if he did that, he would be lying to himself. And if there was one thing that James Potter was, he was a very self-assured person.
He decided in the end to keep up with his daily squabbles with her, to further the progress he had made in making her show what she was hiding from everyone, and to keep his…odd…feelings toward her in check.
He wasn't starting to like her, was he? Because if he did, even in a platonic sense, then he was going to fall into her trap to make even him approve of her and forget that she was keeping something bottled up inside her. And the voice of Sirius in his head (he was now very worried that he really had gone mad) that kept saying "You like Lily! You like Lily!" didn't help him much either.
*****
On the grounds, not too far off from the Whomping Willow, Sirius stood, waiting. He knew what he had to do before he lost his nerve. And in the distance, as he kept chanting over and over what his words would be, he spotted a figure walking toward him.
He was thankful that the curse on his hair had worn off already, after five hours of agonizing over it. Otherwise, he might be provoked to say the opposite of what he meant to. Yes, he was going to apologize. For good.
When Nami finally reached the point where he was standing, looking suspicious and clutching her wand within the pocket of her robes, he took a deep breath and launched into his prepared speech. He even tossed his wand to her, to assure her that he wasn't up to any mischief.
She was silent all throughout his apology and only gave him a cool, indifferent stare, searching his eyes to determine whether he was telling the truth or making her fall into a false security so that he could pull a prank on her when she was caught unawares.
Sirius finished talking, after much stuttering (he hated the occasions when he did that; he was usually very eloquent and confident with what he was going to say), and at the end she only said a simple "Okay."
That was it? No word of protest? No suspicious remarks? Not even (and he was hoping she was going to do this one, as he felt that it was only fair that she should be as guilty as him) an apology in return?
Then she gave him a small smile, a genuine smile all the same, and walked back to the castle without another word. She actually smiled at him. And he didn't have to turn into a dog to provoke it.
That was enough for him.
*****
In the two months that they had so far in their stay in school, the Hogwarts students grew accustomed to Lily Evans and James Potter's fights. They had a variety of topics to fight about, too many to list down and most of the time too petty to be relevant.
On the other hand, it came as a surprise that the most famous pair when it came to mutual enmity in its highest form—Sirius Black and Nami Tzu—suddenly stopped fighting altogether. It seemed as if all the hostility they had for each other was channeled into their best friends, James and Lily, respectively. No one knew about Sirius's apology two months ago.
Chloe had finally gotten over her crush on James and occasionally tried to play peacemaker whenever Lily and James fought. For the rest of the time, Remus and Peter were delegated to break the two apart. The teachers weren't too happy about the turn of events—you would have thought that a silent truce between Sirius and Nami would make their lives lighter, but by far Lily and James were worse, as they were both at the top of their classes and therefore were more skilled in dueling.
In time these events were considered normal and uneventful, though the students (except the Slytherins) were quite disappointed that since James was always preoccupied with arguing with and playing pranks on Lily, he seldom pulled pranks on other people with his friends anymore…
"So, Nami, how come Sirius stopped playing pranks on you?" Chloe asked when the three friends were in their dormitory room on the last Saturday of October (Halloween was on Tuesday).
Nami shrugged. "Who cares? What matters is that he's out of my hair. Too bad I can't say the same for Lily," she added, gesturing at their friend, who was sulking because James had managed to turn all her school robes pink overnight. Lily was so far unsuccessful in changing them back (they clashed horribly with her red hair), and had a sneaking suspicion that they would only turn back to black when she wore them at least once in class.
"Why don't you just borrow somebody else's robes on Monday?" Chloe suggested to the distressed redhead.
Lily frowned. It was an expression that she wore much more frequently this school year. "It's the principle of the matter. If I don't change them back, or wear them to class, he's going to think I lost to him and he's one up."
"Why do you care so much about what James Potter thinks?" Nami asked, twirling her wand lazily and making various objects fly around the room.
Because he's the only one who ever doubted me, Lily thought silently. She was wrong to think that James would leave her alone once she satisfied his efforts to make her lose her patience. Couldn't she just be left hiding her scarred life in peace? She left her friend's question unanswered aloud.
Chloe cleared her throat after a long silence. "I think I better get started on that killer History of Magic assignment in the library. Good luck with your robes, Lil. Or…do you both want to come along?"
Nami shrugged. "I wanted to go take a walk on the grounds, but if Lily isn't going then I'd better stay here and keep her company." She gestured at Lily, who was now staring at her robes, her eyes unfocused.
"Huh? Oh—I don't mind staying here alone, you two go on right ahead with wherever you were planning to go," Lily said suddenly, looking up.
Her two friends exchanged concerned looks. "You sure you don't want to come with one of us? It's Saturday, you don't need to wear your school robes," Nami pointed out.
Lily forced a smile. "No, really, I'll be okay. It's not like I'm sick or anything."
The two nodded and left, telling Lily they'd see her later.
Lily sighed and flopped down on her bed, shutting her eyes. Ever since this morning, she'd had a bad feeling, like something horrible was going to happen—or had happened. Something much bigger than a stupid prank.
But it wasn't as if James's prank didn't have an effect on her either. It was just that she felt as if this latest practical joke culminated all the things that he had done to her to make her feel miserable again. If it wasn't for him, all her bad memories wouldn't resurface to torment her once again. She would still be living her life of fabricated perfection. It didn't help her much back then, but it saved her the pain that she was feeling now.
All her efforts at keeping a happy front and building a wall around her imperfections and painful experiences had left her emotional strength weak and vulnerable. She felt as if she was going to break if just one other thing would trigger her to do so.
No more. She couldn't take any of this anymore.
An owl swooped in through the window, bearing an envelope in its beak. Lily shakily opened it. Two things fell out—a piece of heavy parchment and an ordinary sheet of pad paper. When she finished reading their contents, she felt all the color drain from her face and her soul being torn off piece by piece.
This was the last straw.
*****
~A/N~
Cliffhangers. Gotta love 'em…