I hear something in my bedroom. I hear sounds all evening long. And it's becoming really scary. I'm in panic. I think it's Begbie, with a knive, because I used drugs again. He said he killed me if I ever touched that shite again. I dreamed about this. Begbie came into my room and he cut me in pieces. I want to scream but I can't. No, this can't be true, Mark, it's just because you didn't had a shot. There is no one in your room, I say to myself. I slowly slide out the bed, but when I want to get my feet on the ground I feel something. There is lying someone there. I get really scared. I see images of me cut in pieces and Begbie standing next to me, smiling. I slowly get out of my bed through the other side of the bed, than walk to the side where Begbie is lying, and I totally lose control. I think about all the bad and fucked up things that happened in my life, and I punch at him like it's a pillow.

I fell asleep about 5 minutes after I laid down. I open my eyes and immediately close them. Somebody is punching me. I tried to push this person off me and yelled: "Stop it! Stop it!" And as soon as I yelled, the punching stopped. I crawled to the lightbutton and turn the light on. I turn around to see who has been punching me, and I see Mark lying on the floor. "For fuck's sake Mark. What are you doing? Asshole!!" I yell at him.

She scared the hell out of me. When the light turned on I expected it to be Begbie but it was her. And I didn't know what I had done. She had a big blue eye. "I thought you were Begbie," I said to her. "Begbie? How the fuck can Begbie come into your room Mark?" " I don't know, I dreamed about it and then I saw him here, with a knive. He was trying to kill me." And I started to cry.

"Oh for fuck's sake Mark, no one is trying to kill you. I couldn't sleep so I though I slept here. I missed you, that's all." And I sat down next to him and embraced him. "Look, I know it's hard for you. But you scared me Mark. And my eye hurts." "I'm sorry, it's just, I see things that aren't there. Have you been singing on my bed yesterday?" he asked me. I said I didn't and he told me all the things he had seen. I thought it was really scary. "Mark, I want to stay here, if you don't hit me again. You're kicking off cold turkey and I think that's the best way to do it for you. I'm here for you so if you see things, just tell me Ok?" Mark nodded. I tried to make as less noise as possible when I got his bed against the wall. I got his matras on the floor and my bed next to it. I wouldn't want his parents to wake up at this time of the night. It was 1 o'clock now. I told him to lay down and when he did, I turned the light off. I laid down too and wrapped my arms around him. I waited with closing my eyes until I knew that he was sleeping.