Naruto Primer: All
Homestretch
Meanwhile, back at the brain challenge…
"Oh!!" said Ino, standing up. (She was still in Chouji) "It's um…oh wait, no, never mind."
Kakashi sighed. "How about I give you guys a clue?" he asked. "I want to be at the finish line to see…uh…who wins…"
"You know very well who's going to win!" said Ino angrily.
"Okay, the clue is this; Do unto others as you would have others do unto you." Kakashi said.
Ino stared at him blankly.
"Do unto others as you would have others do unto you?" she asked, trying to look underneath the underneath.
"THAT'S RIGHT!!!" Kakashi said. "Now go."
"Wait, you just gave us the answer!" Ino said.
"…No I didn't." Kakashi said. "You did a really good job looking underneath the underneath. I mean, that was the clue and you looked underneath the underneath and saw that it was actually the answer!" With that, Kakashi disappeared to go to the finish line.
"That was really cheap!" said Ino as she went back into her own body.
Meanwhile, at the biking starting line…
Tenten sighed and sat on her bike, leaning back and forth in a bored manner. "This is really upsetting." She complained.
"Don't worry, I'm sure they'll be around the corner any minute!" Kurenai said, patting Tenten on the shoulder.
They looked up at the ominous corner that Chouji and Ino were supposed to be coming around at any minute. And then, THEY CAME!! THEY CAME!!! WITHOUT PRESENTS AND BOXES AND BAGS, THEY CAME!! Er…
"Hurry!" Tenten yelled.
"We're coming!" said Chouji. They finally did get there and Kurenai blindfolded Chouji and at last, the bad team…I mean, the HORNETS!! The Hornets were off!!
Back at the running event…
"I found Shikamaru!" said Neji as he came running back to the starting line while piggy backing Shikamaru. "He's unconscious though."
"That's okay, it's not like he would have done anything anyway." Said Lee.
"All right, Lee, here's your blindfold." Said Gai as he blindfolded Lee. "Make me proud!"
"I will, Gai!" said Lee as his eyes turned into fireballs and burned through the blindfold so another one had to be applied.
"Okay, so you will all be tied together at the waist." Said Gai as he tied a rope around Sasuke's waist and connected it to a rope tied to Lee's waist and then connected THAT one to a rope tied around Neji's waist. "Neji's the leader so you all have to put trust in him that he's leading you the right way!"
Just as the Puppy Team left, the Pink Team arrived.
"Those guys take forever to start up!" said Naruto as Gai tied a blindfold in front of Naruto's eyes.
"If you had been there, you would understand." Shino said as Gai tied them all together and explained the conditions.
"God speed!!" said Gai as he saluted them and the Pink Team left.
Meanwhile, the Hornets had started biking…
"Are you guys even peddling?!" Tenten asked, looking back at Ino and Chouji.
"I'm just not very fast!" said Chouji.
"And I've already swam a lot!" Ino complained. "I'm tired and blindfolded and all around unhappy!"
"I can't peddle this triple bike with you two on it all by myself!" Tenten said.
"I'm tired!" said Chouji loudly.
"Be quiet, you're not as tired as I am!" Ino said angrily.
Back with the Puppy Team…
"Guys, I'm supposed to be the leader!" Neji called to Sasuke and Lee who were both running ahead of him. They both slowed their pace dramatically.
"Well, we're blindfolded so how are we supposed to know how fast you're going?!" demanded Sasuke.
"Couldn't you speed up a little bit?" requested Lee.
"Well, not only am I not naturally as fast as you two but I have to carry Shikamaru too." Neji pointed out.
"I wish I was the leader of this event!" said Lee.
"How about one of you carry Shikamaru so that I can go faster?" Neji suggested. They all stopped so they could change hands.
"Wouldn't it be awesome if we could just carry Neji too?" said Lee.
It was silent for a minute.
Back with the Pink Team…
"Shino can you see them yet?" Kiba yelled from the back of the line.
"If you mean the bad ass team, then no." Shino replied.
"When are we going to catch up with them?!" Naruto demanded.
"Out of all honesty, I don't think we will." Shino answered.
"Don't say that!" said Hinata.
"Just think about it; they've got Sasuke and Lee on the team." Shino began to explain. "They are both by far the fastest ones among us. Then there's Neji and, while he's not as fast as Sasuke and Lee, he's not particularly slow either."
"Yeah but what about Shikamaru?" said Kiba.
"They're probably carrying him." Shino said.
With the Hornets…
"We will not give up!!" Ino yelled as she got a spurt of energy to peddle fast but then exhausted herself.
"I think we would go faster if we just ran." Tenten sighed.
"Good idea!" said Chouji. "Then again, I don't really feel much like running though."
"Do you think there's any other sort of way we can get out of doing any work?" Ino questioned.
"And you two wonder what you're doing on the bad team?" Tenten said. "On my REAL team, if we ever had this conversation then…wait, no. Never mind. We would never have this conversation."
With the Puppy Team…
"LEFT!!" yelled Neji. "I SAID LEFT!!"
With that, they all tumbled down a ditch off the side of the rode. Neji had been perched atop Lee giving directions while Sasuke ran along side Lee with Shikamaru on his back.
"Why did you go right?" Neji asked when they had come to a stop at the bottom of the ditch.
"I went left." Lee insisted.
"Me too." Said Sasuke.
"No, you both went right." Neji replied.
"I'm seriously starting to doubt your directional skills." Sasuke said.
"What's going on, Neji?" asked Lee. "You did fine in Twister."
"Shut up and let's get out of this ditch." Said Neji.
And the Hornets…
Finally finished biking!!
"It's about time!!" said Sakura, sounding really irritated. "You guys are ungodly far behind!!"
"Then what are we doing just standing around here?!" demanded Tenten. "We have to go and catch up!!"
Then Gai blindfolded Tenten and hooked them all together. Unfortunately, they didn't say, "ONE TWO THREE GO!!" They all just kind of started at their own time or didn't even start at all and just ended up on their arses.
"Should we even bother?" said Chouji.
"YES!!" yelled the females.
With the Puppy Team…
"Okay, just whenever Neji says a specific direction, we'll just go the opposite." Lee whispered to Sasuke even though Neji could hear him just fine.
"But sometimes when he says left, we actually have to go left." Sasuke said. "He's not just going the opposite way. It's just completely random."
"Guys, stop making fun of me." Said Neji.
"I think we all just need to adjust to our handicaps." Said Shikamaru. "Now, since our only set of eyes is completely directionally challenged, all we have to do is think up a strategy to avoid tumbling into another ditch. For example, instead of telling us to go a certain way, Neji can simply tap Lee on the shoulder of the direction we have to go and then Lee can yell out the correct direction for Sasuke to follow."
The three let that absorb into their minds.
Then something else absorbed into their minds.
"Weren't you unconscious?" said Sasuke, sounding annoyed.
"No." said Shikamaru.
With the Pink Team…
"Do you see them yet?" Naruto whined.
"Um…is someone resisting back there?" said Shino, looking behind him. No sooner had he said that than the entire team was jerked backwards and then preceded to…tumble into a ditch.
"What just happened?!" Kiba said, looking around.
"You pulled us into a ditch." Said Shino.
"I did?" Kiba said. "Oh, I was trying to run without using my eyes by following the scent of the bad ass team…"
"They must have fallen into the ditch as well." Said Hinata.
"What?!" said Kiba. "The bad ass team?! Fall into a ditch? Not likely."
"Guys, we are SO the bad ass team." Said Naruto.
"Well here's a bandage." Said Shino, picking up a little while bandage and handing it to Kiba. "Whose is it? Smell it."
"It smells like…rubber…and Lee…and sweat." Said Kiba.
"How do you distinguish between smells like that?" asked Naruto. "I mean, what do I smell like?"
"I don't know how to describe it." said Kiba in a way that you could tell that he just thought he was SO much cooler because he could smell things better than everyone else. "It's the same way you distinguish between things YOU smell."
"We're still in a race, guys." Said Hinata nervously.
"That's right!" said Naruto. "We have to go!!"
With the Puppy Team…
"The finish line is up ahead." Said Neji, using his Byakugan. "It's far away though, because I used my Byakugan."
"Are you sure it's not…just…left or something?" said Sasuke skeptically.
"I'm sure." Said Neji, annoyed.
"Somehow, I don't trust that." Sasuke said.
"I really don't like the way you guys just pick on me like that." Said Neji. "I don't know WHY I mess up the directions, I just do."
"How much further now?" asked Lee.
"I just said that it was far away." Neji reminded them.
"Yeah but we're really fast." Lee said.
"Oh right." Said Neji. "Then I guess we just passed it…we can stop now."
Sasuke and Lee stopped and Neji jumped off Lee's back. "Get off." Said Sasuke to Shikamaru.
"Do I have to?" Shikamaru asked.
"Yes." Said Sasuke.
Shikamaru sighed and said something about walking being troublesome. So he got off and they all removed their blindfolds and were blinded by the light as they went back over to where their teachers were all giving them a golf clap.
"Just as we predicted!" said Gai. "We knew you'd win, we just needed to prove it to ourselves. Of course, I couldn't help but notice that TWO of my students were on the bad ass team and NONE of Kurenai's were. So, even though your students won the last competition, it doesn't mean anything now."
"It's not the bad ass team, it's the Puppy Team." Said Kurenai, crossing her arms.
"Even though we would have preferred if you four HADN'T used the piggy back technique…" Asuma said. "Whatever works, I guess."
Then the team of four and the teachers four waited around for a few more minutes very idly. "The only thing is…we predicted that you'd be able to do it a lot faster than you actually did…" said Kakashi suddenly.
"Well, we continuously fell into ditches during the final leg." Said Sasuke, glaring directly at Neji.
"Yes, we know that." Said Gai. "Did you learn NOTHING from the training?!"
"Look, I don't know why I get them mixed up, I just do!" said Neji.
"Well, at least he's admitting it now." Said Asuma.
"I have a hypothesis about why he mixes them up." Said Shikamaru. "But we'll have to wait until Hinata gets here before I can prove anything."
At that exact moment, the Pink Team crossed the finish line!! IMAGINE THAT!!!
"We fell in so many ditches!" said Kiba as he brushed some dirt of himself.
"Yeah, that would be YOUR fault." Said Naruto.
"Hinata's here now." Said some curious person who wanted to know why Shikamaru thought that Neji mixed up his directions.
"No, we have to wait a little while." Said Shikamaru. "It's too troublesome now. I have to wait for the right moment."
"…Right." Said everyone else, especially all the people who had just arrived.
It was quite a long wait until the Hornets came across the finish line. Everyone pretended as though they had just gotten there to make them feel better, but they weren't stupid and they knew better. But that's okay!! Because now the teachers are satisfied.
Or…are they?
"Guys, we wanted to do one final competition just to make sure that all of our original assumptions about you all were true." Said Kurenai.
"A tag team three-legged race!!" Gai announced.