Naruto Primer: Lil' Sasuke
Ice Cream Man
Just by looking at Sasuke, one can make the inference that he's been aspiring to be a ninja ever since the day he was born. I think we need to revisit the Magic Crystal Ball of the Past to show you just how wrong you are.
Little four-year-old Sasuke was flicking through the three channels that had animated things on them only to find that they were all shows that he didn't want to watch. So he jumped off the couch and instinctively went in search for his awesome older brother.
He slowly opened the door to Itachi's room to find him just sitting by himself. It's not like that was anything out of the ordinary, though, because that was usually the state in which Sasuke found his brother. "Itachi?" Sasuke asked, hanging on the doorknob. "Will you come outside and play with me?"
"Not right now." Said Itachi. "I'm busy."
"Please?" Sasuke asked.
"No, I don't have time." Said Itachi as he stood up and tried to push Sasuke out of the room. "I have to get ready for the chuunin exam. I'm taking it in only a few days." With that, he shut the door on little Sasuke's face.
Sasuke paused for a moment and then went down the stairs, into the kitchen where his mom was making lunch. "Mom…" he said. "I asked Itachi to play with me but he said no…"
"Well, Sasuke, he's very busy." His mother replied.
"But mom, I want to play with him." Said Sasuke, sounding whiny.
"If you just wait until after he takes the chuunin exam, you can play with him all you want." Said his mother.
"But mom, I want to play with him now." Sasuke whined more and more.
"Maybe if you ask him nicely, he'll play with you for a little while." His mom replied, trying to make him go away.
"I did ask him nicely but he said no." Sasuke complained.
"Fine," said his mom, sounding annoyed as she walked to the bottom of the stairs. "ITACHI!!"
"WHAT?!" Itachi yelled from his room.
"COME OUT HERE!!!" she yelled.
Itachi opened the door to his room and stood at the top of his stairs. "What?" he asked.
"Play with your brother!" she said.
"I don't want to!" said Itachi.
"Just for fifteen minutes." Said his mom.
"Mom!" said Itachi as he stomped down the stairs. "I don't have time to play with him now!"
"Itachi, don't make me ground you!" said his mom angrily.
"Just for fifteen minutes then, no more!" said Itachi as he looked at Sasuke who was watching from the other room. "Get your glove, Sasuke! We're playing catch."
"Yay!" cheered Sasuke as he ran off to get his glove.
A few minutes later, Itachi and Sasuke were outside throwing a baseball back and forth. Of course, Sasuke's throws were WAY LAME but that's okay.
"So what is the chuunin exam?" Sasuke asked. "Is it a ninja thing?"
"Yes, it's a ninja thing." Itachi replied. "Maybe if you get good enough, you'll take the exam someday."
"I don't think I will." Sasuke said.
"What, you don't think you'll get good enough?" Itachi asked. "I think you'll get good enough if you work at it."
"I don't think I even want to be a ninja." Sasuke said.
Itachi was so shocked that, in mid throw, he just dropped the ball.
"What?" he said. "Did you just say that you didn't want to be a ninja? All the Uchihas are ninjas."
"But I don't want to." Said Sasuke. "There are other things I want to be when I grow up…"
"What could you possibly want to be when you grow up BESIDES a ninja?" Itachi said as if he couldn't possibly fathom growing up to be anything except for a ninja.
"I don't know…" Sasuke said. "A police officer… or a veterinarian…"
"You want to be a veterinarian when you grow up?" Itachi said, looking disappointed.
"Yeah, kind of." Sasuke answered. "But only if I don't make a good ice cream man!"
"Ice cream man?" Itachi said, dropping his glove. "All right, Sasuke, no more catch."
"But you said you'd play with me for fifteen minutes!" whined Sasuke.
"There are more important things to do than play." Said Itachi, walking over to Sasuke. "I'm going to explain to you the wonders of being a ninja, and then teach you how to throw a shuriken. Then I'll show you how to use the Sharingan because I KNOW you can."
"I just want to play catch." Said Sasuke, as he punched his glove enthusiastically.
"No, give me the glove." Said Itachi.
"I got it for my birthday." Sasuke said protectively.
"I'll give it back." Itachi promised as he pulled a shuriken out of his little pouch that he ALWAYS carries around. "It's a distraction right now. Besides, you can't throw this ninja star if you don't take the glove off."
"But I don't want to throw the ninja star." Said Sasuke.
Finally, Itachi just got fed up and yoinked the glove off Sasuke's hand and put it on the ground. Then he replaced his open palm with a ninja star. "All you have to do is throw it at that tree right there." Itachi explained. "And that's the first step to becoming a ninja."
"I don't want to be a ninja though." Sasuke repeated.
"Just throw it." said Itachi, sounding angry.
Sasuke didn't want to disappoint his cool older brother so he threw the star but it didn't even reach the tree. "I guess I'm not going to be a very good ninja." Said Sasuke.
"You'll be a good ninja, Sasuke." Said Itachi. "Even if I have to stand out here all day waiting for you to throw this star right."
"But I'll miss Scooby Doo." Said Sasuke.
"Being a ninja is much more important than any Scooby Doo rerun!" Itachi said.
"I think I just want to be an ice cream man." Sasuke decided.
"There will be no Uchiha ice cream man!!" yelled Itachi as he took out a ninja star and threw it at the tree so hard that the tree got completely cut in half and the star lodged itself in the tree behind it. "Okay, get it? Like that."
"Wow!" exclaimed Sasuke.
"Now you do it." Itachi instructed.
And so they practiced through the day with Sasuke not really getting any better. At all. Finally, Sasuke just stopped all together. "Itachi, I just want to be an ice cream man." He said.
"Look, Sasuke, if you become a ninja then you can do various missions." Itachi began, bending down to Sasuke's height. "Some of them being delivering ice cream. I delivered ice cream just the other day."
"You mean that if I'm a ninja I can throw ninja stars and cut trees in half AND deliver ice cream all in one day?!" Sasuke said, looking EVER so excited.
"Sometimes you get to deliver ice cream twice!" Itachi said.
"Wow!!" Sasuke cheered. "Then I DO want to be a ninja!"
"Okay, good." Said Itachi with a sigh of relief. "Now I have to go and train for my chuunin exam."
"I'll help you!" said Sasuke. "We could train together!"
"No." said Itachi.