Ric Lansing's home-
He kept his word, and he even went above and beyond it by regulating himself to the couch for the night. Elizabeth was drained by the time they had managed to get into the house. She was fortunate that Ric had kept the clothes that she left in the old house after they had filed for divorce. They hadn't spoken very much after they arrived. Elizabeth, after failing to fight off Ric's insistence that she take the bed because she was, in actuality, his guest, kissed him on the cheek and went into the room, closing the door behind her and changing.
Ric shifted uncomfortably on the couch for the whole night. Part of it was because he was still worried about his nephew, the other part being that the couch just wasn't a very comfortable place to sleep. Maybe even a small amount of his discomfort was due to the fact that Elizabeth was with him at his home again at last, but they weren't together. They weren't in the bed like they had once been. They weren't holding each other passionately as they once had. Everything had changed. It was getting better, there was no denying the fact that things were getting better, but if they would ever be as good as they once were was anyone's guess. Ric wanted them to go back to the way they were, but he knew better than to allow himself to have such foolish hope.
Even Elizabeth, nestled safely behind a locked door on Ric's bed didn't get much rest. How many times had she pondered making the offer that Ric could come into the bed with her? But she was afraid that he would say yes. They promised one another that they would just be there together in case one of them needed the other, and in a way they would always need one another. Their love, problematic as it was, was a strong and binding love that could never really be taken away from either of them. Elizabeth had spent months trying to force herself into believing that it was gone, but she realized that she was wrong and that it would never be gone. It would always be there. Strong and beautiful, the one thing that she knew she could always look on fondly when it came to their relationship. She had so much that had haunted her about her time with Ric that it was a miracle she didn't check herself into a mental institution. It wasn't unexpected that she was feeling the way she was. After all, so much had happened to both of them while they were seeing one another. They had the situation with her losing her baby, their baby, and then almost dying because Ric was feeding her pills to keep her from having any further babies so that they could take Carly's baby. Worst of all was seeing Carly in that room and knowing that Ric had been lying to her for so long about having nothing to do with what happened to Carly. She and Carly weren't friends, but Elizabeth didn't want Carly to suffer in the way that she did at the hands of Ric.
Elizabeth got out of the bed and opened the door, hearing the latch unlock as she made her way into the living room. Ric was lying on the couch, his arm slumped over the side. Elizabeth smiled, she couldn't help it. Sometimes Ric looked like a little boy when he was sleeping. This was one of those times, when he was innocent, when he wasn't going to hurt anyone. She knew that Ric wasn't out to harm anyone. If he was, why would he have done the things that he did for Damian? It would have been easy for Ric to just ignore the true feelings that he had for his nephew and view Damian as one of Sonny's children, one of Sonny's children who just happened to be at his mercy. Ric could have stood by and let Elizabeth do everything, because she wouldn't have stood by and done nothing while her friend was lying on the sidewalk injured. But he didn't Ric actually acted out of compassion for once in his life, something that she thought he could only do with her. Ric was a complex person, there was no denying it. He had a lot of things that went on his life that he needed to address but for whatever reasons didn't. In that respect he was very much like his brother, they rarely, if ever, owned up to their mistakes. They were too proud and too stubborn to dare admit that they were wrong. It was why they had constantly found themselves at the throat of the other. They could have just as easily stopped their silly feud and worked towards something better, but they never would.
Ric heard someone coming up towards him. He got off the couch in a hurry. Being Sonny's brother, and worse, Sonny's enemy taught him to always be woken by the smallest sounds, knowing that they could be someone that was out to hurt him. His mind didn't register that it was probably Elizabeth, all his mind registered as that someone was making a sound and that someone wasn't him. Maybe it would always be like that, even if they managed to work things out and be happy with each other. Could his mind stop for a second and realize that Elizabeth wasn't a threat to him? Probably not, but it was a nice thought.
Elizabeth practically jumped up when Ric spun out of the couch in such a hurry. She put her hands out, "Easy, Ric, it's just me."
Ric blinked, "Elizabeth? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
"It's okay," Elizabeth lowered her arms slowly. "We're all on edge right now. I don't imagine that anyone who knows what is going on with Damian had an easy nights sleep."
"I know I didn't..."
"Ric, I would have been comfortable on the couch," Elizabeth took a few light steps towards Ric. "I've slept on couches before."
"Elizabeth, I wanted you to be comfortable."
"I wouldn't have wanted to be comfortable if I knew that it would have caused you to be so uncomfortable," Elizabeth sat down on the other end of the couch. "I don't want to be selfish."
"You're not selfish, why would you think that you're selfish?"
"Because... of a lot of things, I suppose."
"You want to talk about them?"
"Not really..."
"Elizabeth, you can trust me. You've never not been able to trust me."
Elizabeth shook her head, "I wish that was true."
"Are you saying you don't trust me?"
"I trust you now, Ric," Elizabeth began, "but I haven't always trusted you. There was a time in my life when I couldn't trust you, and that time has just barely passed by me. I've always known deep down that you could be a kind hearted person if you let yourself drop all your defenses, but I spent so much time trying to cloud myself to that fact that I wasn't able to see it until recently."
"I've proven to you that I'm a changed man, haven't I?" Ric wondered. He had changed he wasn't driven by revenge, he was driven by his love for her.
"You have," Elizabeth said. "And I love who you are now. I love that person more than I love the man that I fell in love with."
"I've always loved you, Elizabeth. From the moment I saw you... there was something special, something that told me that you were the one person that I could find salvation in. That's what you do for me, you know? You gave me something that allowed me to save myself from the worst thing that could have happened to me."
"What's that?'
"Myself, my lust for revenge..."
"You've changed everything about your life since that time, Ric," Elizabeth looked around, everything was new. There was almost nothing from the old house that was in the apartment. The only thing that was the same was the picture that they had taken... it was still there, still in the same frame. The one thing that hadn't changed in Ric's new apartment was the one thing that hadn't changed at all, his love for her. "Why did you sell the house?"
"I couldn't stay there," Ric said. "It was supposed to be our dream house, the place that would let us begin the perfect life before I ruined everything. I couldn't stay there knowing all the hopes that we had given to that place and knowing how much I'd destroyed those hopes."
"Well, there's no denying that you did that," Elizabeth said. "But there's also no denying that I haven't forgiven you. You're sick, Ric... and I don't mean that in a bad way, but you find yourself so vexed by this thing you have against Sonny that it poisons you."
"I'm trying to change," Ric defended himself because it was what he was used to. His mind was telling him that he wasn't under attack, but his mouth wasn't listening.
"Yes, you are... and you've taken those first steps to becoming the man that I knew you could have been, the man that I would gladly be in love with."
"I'm glad that you stayed here..."
"You had a point, we needed each other on some level. Even though we were quiet and we didn't talk I felt better knowing that you were outside the room protecting me."
"I'll always protect you, Elizabeth."
"Do you want to go back to the hospital?" Elizabeth wondered. "I know how much you don't want to end up getting into another argument with everyone there."
"I can't let my family, the family that hates me, stop me from being around the family that doesn't hate me," Ric said. "Even though I'm sure that I'll be grilled and accused of things the minute that I walk inside... I can take it. He needs everyone in Port Charles that cares for him to be at his side."
"You want to take a shower first?"
"Elizabeth, you know that you should go first."
"Ric, I made you sleep on the couch."
"Its fine... my spine will realign itself eventually." Ric moved up and kissed her on the lips. "Now, please, take your shower. But don't use up all the hot water."
"I thought you liked cold showers."
"I only told you that because you would always use up all the hot water and I didn't want you to feel bad," Ric smiled. "I'm sure that I have some of your clothes that were left when you moved out somewhere."
"Why'd you keep them?" Elizabeth asked. "Why didn't you give them to the goodwill or something."
"Because they were a reminder that you loved me once, Elizabeth. A reminder of the best time in my life, a time that I would never want to forget. Even if I did lose my mind, I would still have something that would help me remember. The feel of the dress that you wore when we got married, it would fill me with memories that I could never forget. Something to remember."
Elizabeth got off the couch. She thought about offering Ric the chance for them to take a shower together, but she couldn't. She loved Ric, she truly loved him, but how much was she willing to give to him this time? It was a question that she didn't quite know the answer to.
He kept his word, and he even went above and beyond it by regulating himself to the couch for the night. Elizabeth was drained by the time they had managed to get into the house. She was fortunate that Ric had kept the clothes that she left in the old house after they had filed for divorce. They hadn't spoken very much after they arrived. Elizabeth, after failing to fight off Ric's insistence that she take the bed because she was, in actuality, his guest, kissed him on the cheek and went into the room, closing the door behind her and changing.
Ric shifted uncomfortably on the couch for the whole night. Part of it was because he was still worried about his nephew, the other part being that the couch just wasn't a very comfortable place to sleep. Maybe even a small amount of his discomfort was due to the fact that Elizabeth was with him at his home again at last, but they weren't together. They weren't in the bed like they had once been. They weren't holding each other passionately as they once had. Everything had changed. It was getting better, there was no denying the fact that things were getting better, but if they would ever be as good as they once were was anyone's guess. Ric wanted them to go back to the way they were, but he knew better than to allow himself to have such foolish hope.
Even Elizabeth, nestled safely behind a locked door on Ric's bed didn't get much rest. How many times had she pondered making the offer that Ric could come into the bed with her? But she was afraid that he would say yes. They promised one another that they would just be there together in case one of them needed the other, and in a way they would always need one another. Their love, problematic as it was, was a strong and binding love that could never really be taken away from either of them. Elizabeth had spent months trying to force herself into believing that it was gone, but she realized that she was wrong and that it would never be gone. It would always be there. Strong and beautiful, the one thing that she knew she could always look on fondly when it came to their relationship. She had so much that had haunted her about her time with Ric that it was a miracle she didn't check herself into a mental institution. It wasn't unexpected that she was feeling the way she was. After all, so much had happened to both of them while they were seeing one another. They had the situation with her losing her baby, their baby, and then almost dying because Ric was feeding her pills to keep her from having any further babies so that they could take Carly's baby. Worst of all was seeing Carly in that room and knowing that Ric had been lying to her for so long about having nothing to do with what happened to Carly. She and Carly weren't friends, but Elizabeth didn't want Carly to suffer in the way that she did at the hands of Ric.
Elizabeth got out of the bed and opened the door, hearing the latch unlock as she made her way into the living room. Ric was lying on the couch, his arm slumped over the side. Elizabeth smiled, she couldn't help it. Sometimes Ric looked like a little boy when he was sleeping. This was one of those times, when he was innocent, when he wasn't going to hurt anyone. She knew that Ric wasn't out to harm anyone. If he was, why would he have done the things that he did for Damian? It would have been easy for Ric to just ignore the true feelings that he had for his nephew and view Damian as one of Sonny's children, one of Sonny's children who just happened to be at his mercy. Ric could have stood by and let Elizabeth do everything, because she wouldn't have stood by and done nothing while her friend was lying on the sidewalk injured. But he didn't Ric actually acted out of compassion for once in his life, something that she thought he could only do with her. Ric was a complex person, there was no denying it. He had a lot of things that went on his life that he needed to address but for whatever reasons didn't. In that respect he was very much like his brother, they rarely, if ever, owned up to their mistakes. They were too proud and too stubborn to dare admit that they were wrong. It was why they had constantly found themselves at the throat of the other. They could have just as easily stopped their silly feud and worked towards something better, but they never would.
Ric heard someone coming up towards him. He got off the couch in a hurry. Being Sonny's brother, and worse, Sonny's enemy taught him to always be woken by the smallest sounds, knowing that they could be someone that was out to hurt him. His mind didn't register that it was probably Elizabeth, all his mind registered as that someone was making a sound and that someone wasn't him. Maybe it would always be like that, even if they managed to work things out and be happy with each other. Could his mind stop for a second and realize that Elizabeth wasn't a threat to him? Probably not, but it was a nice thought.
Elizabeth practically jumped up when Ric spun out of the couch in such a hurry. She put her hands out, "Easy, Ric, it's just me."
Ric blinked, "Elizabeth? I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you."
"It's okay," Elizabeth lowered her arms slowly. "We're all on edge right now. I don't imagine that anyone who knows what is going on with Damian had an easy nights sleep."
"I know I didn't..."
"Ric, I would have been comfortable on the couch," Elizabeth took a few light steps towards Ric. "I've slept on couches before."
"Elizabeth, I wanted you to be comfortable."
"I wouldn't have wanted to be comfortable if I knew that it would have caused you to be so uncomfortable," Elizabeth sat down on the other end of the couch. "I don't want to be selfish."
"You're not selfish, why would you think that you're selfish?"
"Because... of a lot of things, I suppose."
"You want to talk about them?"
"Not really..."
"Elizabeth, you can trust me. You've never not been able to trust me."
Elizabeth shook her head, "I wish that was true."
"Are you saying you don't trust me?"
"I trust you now, Ric," Elizabeth began, "but I haven't always trusted you. There was a time in my life when I couldn't trust you, and that time has just barely passed by me. I've always known deep down that you could be a kind hearted person if you let yourself drop all your defenses, but I spent so much time trying to cloud myself to that fact that I wasn't able to see it until recently."
"I've proven to you that I'm a changed man, haven't I?" Ric wondered. He had changed he wasn't driven by revenge, he was driven by his love for her.
"You have," Elizabeth said. "And I love who you are now. I love that person more than I love the man that I fell in love with."
"I've always loved you, Elizabeth. From the moment I saw you... there was something special, something that told me that you were the one person that I could find salvation in. That's what you do for me, you know? You gave me something that allowed me to save myself from the worst thing that could have happened to me."
"What's that?'
"Myself, my lust for revenge..."
"You've changed everything about your life since that time, Ric," Elizabeth looked around, everything was new. There was almost nothing from the old house that was in the apartment. The only thing that was the same was the picture that they had taken... it was still there, still in the same frame. The one thing that hadn't changed in Ric's new apartment was the one thing that hadn't changed at all, his love for her. "Why did you sell the house?"
"I couldn't stay there," Ric said. "It was supposed to be our dream house, the place that would let us begin the perfect life before I ruined everything. I couldn't stay there knowing all the hopes that we had given to that place and knowing how much I'd destroyed those hopes."
"Well, there's no denying that you did that," Elizabeth said. "But there's also no denying that I haven't forgiven you. You're sick, Ric... and I don't mean that in a bad way, but you find yourself so vexed by this thing you have against Sonny that it poisons you."
"I'm trying to change," Ric defended himself because it was what he was used to. His mind was telling him that he wasn't under attack, but his mouth wasn't listening.
"Yes, you are... and you've taken those first steps to becoming the man that I knew you could have been, the man that I would gladly be in love with."
"I'm glad that you stayed here..."
"You had a point, we needed each other on some level. Even though we were quiet and we didn't talk I felt better knowing that you were outside the room protecting me."
"I'll always protect you, Elizabeth."
"Do you want to go back to the hospital?" Elizabeth wondered. "I know how much you don't want to end up getting into another argument with everyone there."
"I can't let my family, the family that hates me, stop me from being around the family that doesn't hate me," Ric said. "Even though I'm sure that I'll be grilled and accused of things the minute that I walk inside... I can take it. He needs everyone in Port Charles that cares for him to be at his side."
"You want to take a shower first?"
"Elizabeth, you know that you should go first."
"Ric, I made you sleep on the couch."
"Its fine... my spine will realign itself eventually." Ric moved up and kissed her on the lips. "Now, please, take your shower. But don't use up all the hot water."
"I thought you liked cold showers."
"I only told you that because you would always use up all the hot water and I didn't want you to feel bad," Ric smiled. "I'm sure that I have some of your clothes that were left when you moved out somewhere."
"Why'd you keep them?" Elizabeth asked. "Why didn't you give them to the goodwill or something."
"Because they were a reminder that you loved me once, Elizabeth. A reminder of the best time in my life, a time that I would never want to forget. Even if I did lose my mind, I would still have something that would help me remember. The feel of the dress that you wore when we got married, it would fill me with memories that I could never forget. Something to remember."
Elizabeth got off the couch. She thought about offering Ric the chance for them to take a shower together, but she couldn't. She loved Ric, she truly loved him, but how much was she willing to give to him this time? It was a question that she didn't quite know the answer to.