Naruto Primer: All
Metaphor
One day, Kiba and Akamaru were sitting at a kitchen table with a huge bowl of ice cream. They were sharing. This particular bowl of ice cream was the biggest of the big, it was bigger than the Belly Busters at Chadwicks.
"Akamaru, do you HAVE to stick your face in my ice cream?" said Kiba. "Do I have to teach you how to use a spoon next? You're getting fur in my ice cream. There is SO MUCH FUR in my ice cream."
Just then, Chouji came strolling in with an ice cream cone. It had one huge gargantuan scoop on the top. It was the biggest scoop ever. He must have used a bowl as his ice cream scoop or SOMETHING because this particular scoop of ice cream was huge. Now, he didn't have as much ice cream as Kiba and his certainly didn't have any fur in it, but no one has seen a single scoop as large as that before.
"That is such a huge scoop!" exclaimed Kiba.
"I know!" said Chouji, sitting next to Kiba. "I used a bowl instead of an ice cream scoop! Hey, you have fur in your ice cream! That's gross! How can you eat ice cream with fur in it?"
"It doesn't bother me that much." Kiba confessed. "I eat around it."
Then Shikamaru came in with a ice cream cone. He sat down next to Chouji. His ice cream cone had two scoops of ice cream, both vanilla, but there was chocolate syrup on one of them.
"What's up with the chocolate syrup on only ONE of your scoop of ice cream?" questioned Kiba, leaning over.
"Well…I was going to put it on it all but…after the first one…it just got too troublesome." Shikamaru replied.
Just then, Sasuke came in. "Hey, has anyone seen my banana split?" he asked, looking around. "I made this awesome banana split and then I turned around to get the cherry but then, I looked at the banana split to see that it was only an empty bowl with a banana peel in it. So now I'm stuck with a banana peel and a cherry."
He held up the banana peel and the cherry.
"Sorry." Said the three of them.
That's when Neji entered, looking angry. "I took some ice cream out of the freezer." He started. "I scooped out some chocolate ice cream for myself and I went to get a spoon but then my ice cream was gone. Bowl and all."
"Why don't you just scoop yourself some more?" asked Shikamaru.
"Because there's no more chocolate." Neji answered. "Only chocolate chocolate chip. And chocolate chips offend me so much."
"What did chocolate chips ever do to you?" asked Chouji.
"You don't even want to know." Neji said, sitting down.
"I think there's an ice cream thief around here." Said Sasuke. "Because someone took my ice cream and left only this banana peel and this cherry."
"I bet Hinata took mine." Said Neji.
"I don't think Hinata took your ice cream." Said Kiba.
"I think she did." Neji convinced himself.
That's when Sakura pranced in with an ice cream bowl. It had a tiny little scoop on it, but that was all she needed. "Hey, you guys all have ice cream too?" she asked.
"Not me." Said Neji and Sasuke.
"Well, I think some of you have very large portions and maybe should share…" Sakura said slowly, eyeing Kiba.
"No, it's mine!" said Kiba.
"Besides, it has fur in it." Chouji pointed out.
"How can you eat ice cream with fur?" asked Sakura.
"I eat AROUND it." Kiba sighed.
Shino was next to arrive. He had a small bowl with some vanilla ice cream that had chocolate jimmies on it. Lots of jimmies. Probably more jimmies than ice cream.
"I like jimmies." He said before anyone could question him.
"I think that many jimmies is a little gross." Said Shikamaru as Shino sat down.
"I don't think so." Shino said. "I've ALWAYS put this much jimmies on my ice cream so it's normal for me."
Hinata came in just then. Neji immediately eyed her evilly. She could feel his evil glare so she quickly walked past him to sit next to Kiba. "Wow, Kiba, you have so much ice cream!" she exclaimed.
"Yeah!" said Kiba. "I'll share with you!"
"No, that's okay!" said Hinata. "I have my own."
"Is it chocolate?" Neji said.
"No." Hinata replied. "I like chocolate chocolate chip."
"You would." Said Neji, scoffing her.
"Hinata, Shino, Sakura, have any of you seen my enormous banana split?" Sasuke asked. "Someone took it while my back was turned and left behind this cherry and banana peel."
Just at that EXACT moment, Ino came in with an ice cream cone. She had a small portion of mint ice cream on the cone that was not nearly as big as Chouji's, only one scoop unlike Shikamaru's, but they all had obviously gotten their cones out of the same little box.
"Is EVERYONE eating ice cream?" Ino asked. "I thought I'd be able to rub it all in your faces that I had ice cream and you didn't…"
"WE don't have ice cream." Said Neji and Sasuke evilly.
"Oh…" said Ino since those were the two people she hadn't planned on being mean to even if nobody had ice cream.
Tenten and Lee ran in just then. "Geez, Neji, are you still hung on your missing ice cream?!" demanded Lee. "We have to train! There's no time for ice cream!!"
"Is this an ice cream party?" asked Tenten. "I'm lactose intolerant…"
"I will never get over my strange missing ice cream." Said Neji, shooting Hinata an evil glare.
"Whoever stole my ice cream is going to pay." Said Sasuke.
It was now Naruto's turn. "Did I hear somebody say ice cream?!" he yelled. "I want some ice cream!!"
"Oh no, Naruto, you don't get any ice cream." Said everyone together.
"That's not fair!" whined Naruto. "Is there none left?"
"You could say that." Everyone replied.
Naruto was just about to run away crying when he met up with Iruka in the doorway. "Iruka, do you have any ice cream?" he asked.
"No…" Iruka replied. "I haven't had ice cream for a long, long time. Instead, how about you and I go and get some sherbet?"
"Okay!" said Naruto as he and Iruka went off to get some sherbet.
"Well, I suppose it's pointless to just hang on to this banana peel." Sasuke sighed, walking over to the trashcan. When he looked in it, he gasped loudly when he saw a mess of ice cream and bananas and all sorts of other things that he had put on his banana split. "Hey!! Someone threw my banana split in the trash!"
"That's awful!" said Sakura. "How could someone do that?!"
"Whoever threw my ice cream in the trashcan is definitely going to pay…" Sasuke said, throwing the banana peel in the trashcan as hard as he could.