Haruka was not herself today.
The events of the day had taken their toll; Haruka was in an absolutely horrible mood and not afraid to let anyone know it.
She arrived for work distant and sullen, was snappy with the mechanics and customers, and did not utter a sound unless absolutely necessary.
Kumada Arika was worried about his prodigy junior racer. Usually she was flippant and confident, ranting about the injustices of her school and the various assholes that attended it. Usually she was sarcastic and enthusiastic and very, very interested in the events of the race track/auto shop. Usually she was eager and if not happy, content.
Today Haruka was not herself.
Kumada had known Haruka for nearly five years; he was her mentor and she was his prodigy. They were close, buddies, she was like a sister to him…and it hurt to see her so upset.
For Kumada knew that she was upset. He could see through her façade; he had known her for too long. Although she acted cross and was irritable, although she was distant and standoffish, Kumada knew that inside she was distressed, that she had somehow been hurt…
The poor kid had a lot against her; first of all her father was an absolute asshole who had deserted her and her mother, after putting them through hell beforehand. Her mother was never there for her daughter. At school she was an outcast, and was always getting in trouble for fighting…kids turned against her because everyone knew what her father had done… She was forced to fight for anything resembling a normal life, having to fight against invisible forces that were stacked against her…having to fight against fragments left over from the past, her parents' battles…the consequences of her parent's actions was the cross she was obliged to carry…
Kumada remembered well the day he had first laid eyes on Tenou Haruka…
*****
It had been five years prior, in the summer of '92. A former professional motorcycle and car racer, Kumada had just previously purchased his race track/auto shop after a serious accident had rendered him unable to professionally compete.
The day of their meeting, Kumada was hosting a semi-professional motorcycle competition. Although not a competitor, Kumada was a coach to several promising young racers…one of them being Marubeni Kotano's love interest at the time, Matsuda Denbe.
Kumada remembered Matsuda escorting a beautiful blond woman and her tall blond daughter into the racing pits. He remembered the young man, obviously smitten with the former model, showing her and her daughter the different motorcycles and guiding them through the garage. He remembered the young man trying to explain to them both the mechanics of how an engine worked…and he remembered the fascination and excitement on the young girl's face.
Haruka had found her calling that day at the racetrack. She had seen the race from the bleachers, and had immediately fallen in love with the high of the race, the speed of the cars, and the sheer power behind them. She had stood and cheered, oblivious to her condescending mother, oblivious to everything but the roar of the engines and the exhilaration of the race.
So exited was the girl that she stood out in Kumada's mind…amidst the vast crowds of people only that girl stood out, only the tall, thin girl with the waist length blond hair…only she was able to capture Kumada's attention…and he didn't even know her name.
During the weeks following the race, Kumada often saw the girl hanging around the auto shop, sometimes accompanied by Matsuda, sometimes on her own. Even after her mother had broken up with the devastated young racer was the girl present at the track, even when Matsuda left Kumada's establishment was the girl present…
Normally Kumada was not fond of children; a self-proclaimed recluse, he found it difficult to develop relationships with others regardless of their age…especially children. There were few people close to him, few people he could consider friends, he seemed content to avoid others outside of his close-knit circle…but there was something about that girl that intrigued him.
Finally one day he decided to approach her. He had just finished a custom body job on a '67 Mustang, and was aware of the girl standing against the far wall.
Not one for small talk, Kumada had gone straight to the point.
"Hey kid, what are you doing?"
She had looked at him in surprise; having seen him numerous times beforehand, this marked the first occasion that he had spoken to her.
"I'm just watching," she had replied, direct and straightforward.
Kumada had walked over to her; up close she looked younger than he had initially thought. Being so tall he had figured her to be at least ten or eleven, but up close he could see that he had been wrong.
"You like cars?" he had asked her.
Suddenly a big grin had appeared on her face. "Yeah, do I ever! I especially like racers, like that blue Porsche over there," she said, pointing to Kumada's personal favourite car, the car in which he had won the Okura District Championship driving.
"Hey, that's my favourite, too. You know what model it is?"
Her smile widened, "Of course! It's a 1985 Porsche 944 Turbo!"
Kumada had been struck speechless; she had been dead on. Since it was a custom racer, the name of the car was not written above the bumper. Damn, the kid was good.
"Yeah, that's right! You know, I won many a race with that car, do you want to take a look at it?"
"Sure!" The girl had exclaimed, excitement colouring her cheeks pink.
Kumada had shown the girl the car, asking her questions and testing her knowledge. He had been pleasantly surprised at her vast understanding of cars, and had been pleased with her enthusiasm on the subject and her desire to learn more. Kumada had spent the entire afternoon talking with the girl, and it wasn't until she was leaving that they got around to introducing themselves.
So began the saga of Tenou Haruka and Kumada Akira.
Haruka would visit Kumada's shop almost everyday after school, despite it being over an hours walk away.
In the beginning, Haruka had just watched Kumada and the mechanics, but as time went on Kumada encouraged her to take part in the washing and deodorizing of the cars. Kumada gradually taught her to change the oil, how to repair engines and other assorted auto maintenance jobs. Finally he taught her to do bodywork. As a result, Haruka was as knowledgeable as a mechanic at the age of twelve.
Kumada was also her racing coach; he had taught her at ten years on his old BMW R 75/6. Though only thirteen Haruka was able to ride Kumada's old motorcycle like a pro.
Although Haruka and Kumada's relationship was based mainly on cars, there existed a stronger bond between them. Neither was particularly talkative or open about their personal lives or feelings, but as time went on both became aware of each other's personality traits and moods. If one was down, the other was able to recognise this and respond accordingly. They were able to offer comfort and support to each other without specifics, without details; words or explanations were unnecessary.
Kumada was able to see through the mask that hid Haruka's true feelings from the world.
*****
Kumada stood in the area below the bleachers, watching the motorcyclist rip through the racetrack. A motorcyclist who possessed unbelievable talent, who was able to perform manoeuvres impossible to decipher, who rode as if the wind…
Tenou Haruka sped around the arena, cutting a seriously close corner at break neck speed; even in his prime Kumada knew he wouldn't have been able to pull off a stunt like that.
The bike screeched to a halt, and Haruka dismounted amidst a cloud of dust. Clad in a navy blue racing suit, she stood out amidst the surrounding smokescreen. She pulled off her helmet and tossed her head back, her long blond ponytail tumbling from her helmet and blowing in the wind. The expression on her face was close to rapture, the look only worn after a good race.
She held her hand above her brow, squinting through the dust at the evening sky. Her features clouded over; apart from the race her troubles resurfaced and once again the events of the day troubled her as they had before. The race had only been an interlude, a brief escape from the difficulties and troubles that she faced everyday.
Sighing, Haruka walked the bike out of the arena and into the garage; Kumada watched her departure with sympathy. He followed her soon after.
Kumada found Haruka in the BMW's stall, polishing the blue vehicle until it shone. He smiled; despite her mood, Haruka could always be counted on to keep his motorcycle in top condition.
So intent on the motorcycle was Haruka that she failed to notice Kumada step beside her kneeling form and rest his arm against the wall.
"Hey Tenou, you were really looking good out there," he said; Haruka's head spun around in surprise and Kumada was shocked to see tears swimming in her blue-grey eyes.
"Oh," he spoke, at a loss for words. Not once had he seen her cry, not once in the five years that he had known her.
Quickly Haruka stood and turned her back to Kumada, too embarrassed to let him see her this way. She dug frantically through her pockets in search of a tissue. Upon finding none, she rubbed her eyes with the corner of her sleeve. The gesture struck Kumada as childlike but also as proud; she would not let anyone see her with her guard down.
"Hey, Tenou, come on, what's wrong?" Kumada asked sympathetically, placing his hand on her shoulder…a shoulder almost level with his own yet much smaller, seeming almost vulnerable…
"Nothing," she muttered, trying to escape his grasp, but he wouldn't let her.
Kumada wouldn't permit her run from him. She kept too much bottled inside herself, and damned if he was going to let her endure this pain alone.
"Come on, Tenou, talk to me," he pleaded, worry creeping into his voice, "I know something's wrong, you've been acting strange all day, please, talk to me…"
"I said nothing's wrong!" she retaliated, her words harsh but her tone one of angst.
He was not persuaded; he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and he felt her resistance dissolve.
She hung her head; her small shoulders, usually straight and proud now slumped and defeated. Her long hair was spilling out of its ponytail and over her shoulders, the strands reaching past her waist…she hid behind her curtain of hair.
"I…I can't, Kumada-san, I just can't…"she whispered, her voice heavy with pain and unshed anguish. She would not face him.
"Hey, its OK, really, it is. You can talk to me, you know I won't judge you…"
"I know," she replied, weakening but still stubborn. "I know that you won't laugh, or pass judgement, but…its just too personal."
"You don't have to give details, Tenou, I know its not your way…but, can you give me the gist of it, at least?" He smiled sadly, "I know that you're hurting, I know you've been hurting for years…and I know that it's difficult to talk about. But it'll help if you can get some of it off your chest…please, Tenou, I'm here for you."
She swallowed, and slowly turned around. The tears were shinning in her eyes, her hands were clenched into fists, and she bit down on her lower lip…struggling to stop the tears from falling. She would not cry in front of the one person she respected and valued as a friend.
He led her towards the bench outside the garage looking out towards the arena. The slight evening breeze ruffled her hair; she bent her head up towards the sky as if searching for reassurance.
They sat down beside one another, Kumada's form bent towards her, Haruka looking down; he grasped her right hand and applied slight pressure.
The cool late winter air was a welcome presence outside of the unbearable heat of the garage. Outside the air was clean and refreshing, Haruka drew strength from the cool night and began.
"I almost killed someone at school today,"
Kumada gasped, started coughing, "You WHAT?! Almost killed someone at school! Come on, Tenou, seriously…"
Haruka scowled and stood up, "I am serious! I thought that I could trust you…"
"Hey, I'm sorry, Tenou, really! Sit back down; really, I'm sorry! But what do you expect my reaction to be when you tell me you almost killed someone?"
She smiled wryly, "Hmm, I guess you have a point," she sat back down and stretched her long legs, looking up at the setting sun whimsically.
"So, do you care to elaborate, or am I to assume you've gone off the deep end?" Kumada joked, trying to take pressure off the situation and put Haruka at ease.
She smiled lightly at Kumada's efforts, but the smile did not reach her eyes. She appreciated that he was trying to make things easier, but at the same time felt as if it were useless to lighten the mood. Once he heard her out, Haruka doubted that he would be able to take things light-heartedly.
"I guess I should try to explain…" she said, "It all started this morning…I can't go into details, but my Mom is upset with me for something…something for which I cannot help, or take control of, something inevitable yet still surprising to her…"
Kumada raised his eyebrow slightly, "Was it something that you've done?"
"No, not really…more like something that happened to me. I wanted to keep it to myself, but I needed her help, so I was forced to reveal it to her…"
"And I can assume that she wasn't happy?"
"Yeah, she certainly wasn't happy about it, but I can't exactly explain just how she felt towards me. She was…distant…not angry, not frustrated…disappointed, maybe? I'm not sure. Anyway, her reaction was kind of a downer, if you know what I mean. So when I got to school I wasn't in a very good mood."
Kumada nodded sympathetically. "OK. So, you go to school, and you're upset, and then…"
"Well, you know the thing that was bothering my mother? Because of this thing…I kind of vandalised something in the bathroom."
"What? I'm not really following you, Tenou,"
Haruka sighed, "I guess I can't explain myself if I leave out too much information, right? Ok, I'll try to break it to you, but promise not to get grossed out."
"I promise. Jeez, Tenou, how bad could it possibly be?"
"Just don't say I didn't warn you…I'll just say that this is something that happens when you grow older…to girls…"
"I don't…Oh, shit…" Kumada turned a violent shade of red, and suddenly he found something about his shoes incredibly interesting.
Haruka laughed, lessoning the tension. "Sorry, but if you weren't such an idiot I wouldn't have had to go into details…"
There was a brief period of silence while Kumada regained his composure.
"OK, so you were going through…your time of month…and you vandalised something in the bathroom…"
"Yeah. So, during lunch hour, I was sitting outside, and I heard a scream. Now, being pissed off and edgy, my natural reaction was to release some of this anger I had been carrying around all day…so I went to investigate."
Haruka took a deep breath, "I followed the direction that the scream had come from…and I saw this guy, Saeki, picking on a smaller boy. The boy was face down in a puddle of mud, and wasn't wearing any pants…"
"Oh, Jesus, Tenou," Kumada groaned, feeling sick.
"Yeah, my thoughts exactly…anyways, this Saeki seemed like an asshole (Kumada coughed, rather obviously), OK, he WAS an asshole, and he seemed like the perfect target. So I approached him, and made some crack about his manliness…
Kumada moaned, "Tenou!"
"Oh, come on, Kumada-san! I was desperate for a good fight! So, I insulted him, and he lunged at me to prove himself, or something…and I kicked his ass, as usual…and then he did something unexpected."
She paused, weighing her words. However much she liked Kumada, there were some things that she couldn't tell him, some things that she couldn't even admit to herself…
"What did he do?" asked Kumada softly.
"He…he said something really cruel…something that hurt me, deep inside…and I retaliated the only way I could…" she looked down at her clasped hands, unable to meet his gaze, "…I strangled him until he passed out…and didn't stop until someone screamed. It was then that I realised just what I was doing…I saw Saeki below me, my arms grasping his throat…and he was blue, his face was fucking blue…"
"Oh, shit, Tenou," said Kumada, feeling sick.
"Around his neck…were bruises, and bruises were beginning to appear on his face…and his hands, they were curled into claws, and they were convulsing…"
"Oh, sweet Jesus,"
"And the worst thing was that I don't remember strangling him. My mind…after his words, my mind was so filled with pain that I was unaware of what I was doing…a blackout, or something…"
Her hands were shaking, but still she continued, "I was so scared, I just couldn't believe what I had done. His pulse…it was so weak…I think that another thirty seconds would have finished him off. There was screaming all around me; I couldn't move, I was paralysed...even when I heard a teacher approaching I remained immobile. The teacher, he was flabbergasted, he just couldn't believe his eyes…started stuttering like a moron…he didn't know whether to help the kid in the mud, or Saeki…It was then that I was able to gain control of myself."
Kumada was shocked. It was unbelievable how quickly control could be lost, how emotions could wreck havoc…
"I was sent to the Principal's office. Principal Ozawa, I've mentioned him before…he hit the roof. Couldn't believe what I had done. Said that I almost killed Saeki. He looked like he wanted to hit me. He wanted to know just what the hell I was thinking, he demanded an answer, but I simply couldn't respond. He saw my silence as resistance, as indifference…and this only caused his anger to grow. He started going on about how bad seeds spawned bad offspring…he insulted my father, he insulted my mother, he called me a bastard…and still I couldn't answer. I just couldn't defend myself. He was right. I HAD almost killed Saeki; I deserved this shit…so I took it. Just it wasn't enough. He wanted to know why I did what I did."
"Oh, Tenou," Kumada whispered, but Haruka was not finished.
"I didn't understand what the hell I had been thinking…not really. All I knew was that Saeki had wounded me terribly, and I had retaliated the only way I knew how. I only knew that the pain he had inflicted struck me deep, in a place that I refused to acknowledge…"
The part of her that she kept hidden from the world…and herself.
"At this time the other teacher, the one who discovered the fight, interrupted…and damned if he didn't defend me. He claimed that I was defending the other kid; the one who Saeki had been picking on before I arrived…said that I might have saved the other kid's life. Apparently Saeki had beaten this poor kid almost as badly as I beat him…before he forced the kid to fuck the mud. This poor kid, he was epileptic, and he was having a seizure. Almost died. None of the bystanders offered any help. The kid, after his seizure, he collapsed in the mud…he couldn't get up, and the mud was blocking his airway. According to this teacher, if I hadn't interrupted Saeki's attack on this kid, then the kid would have suffocated."
At this point Kumada was unable to take any more; his face was green and his eyes were wide with shock. He looked at the girl beside him, the girl he had known years, and realised for perhaps the first time just what kind of a world she lived in.
"So what happened?" asked Kumada.
"I was lucky. Considering the fact that I may have indirectly saved this kid's life, I managed to get off with only five days suspension. Ozawa was fit to be tied, but even he couldn't ignore the fact that I supposedly saved the kid's life. Poor kid, he was retarded, too."
Haruka closed her eyes and enjoyed the cool breeze across her face. The weight of her words still hung in the air, and for the moment both simply remained in silence. Haruka needed this period to recover, Kumada to absorb what she had told him.
Kumada was the first to break the silence. "How do you feel about this, Tenou?"
She shrugged. "I'm not quite sure how I feel. On the one hand I'm glad that I was able to help this kid, but on the other hand…that wasn't the reason I got involved. The truth is that the reason I fought Saeki wasn't to save this kid, it was to release my frustrations. I didn't fight Saeki for anything but selfish purposes. I was looking for a fight, and Saeki just happened to be around. I didn't give a shit about the kid; I didn't know the extent of his injuries, I didn't know that he was retarded or epileptic, and most importantly I didn't know that his life was in danger. The fact that I may have saved the kid doesn't make up for the fact that I could have killed Saeki. How do I feel? Pretty damn bad about myself."
It was at this point that Kumada embraced her. Both were surprised; theirs was not a physical relationship. But it felt right. Haruka felt his arms around her, and she felt the frustration and pain of her day fall from her shoulders. Kumada held her close, this poor, fucked up kid without anyone to turn towards.
They did not part until the last light of day disappeared.
*****
Through the streets she ventured, heedless of all but the route before her. The sounds of laughter came from the shadows. Haruka picked up her pace as the laughter grew louder.
The streets of East Osaka were dangerous after darkness fell.
Despite Kumada's protests, Haruka had insisted that she was able to walk home. She had been too much of a burden already.
Haruka shoved her hands into her worn jean jacket, cursing that she hadn't thought to wear gloves. Although winter was nearly over, the nights were still cold. As a result she was ill prepared for the current temperature, being that she had planned on returning home before dark. Of course, nothing happened according to plan today…
"Stupid," she cursed herself, recalling her actions earlier that evening. Pouring her heart out to Kumada…sure, he was her friend, but he was a guy. Now he probably thought of her being weak, being clingy…he probably thought worse of her.
The wind blew her hair about her shoulders; it had come undone. Her long skirt whipped around her legs; her blouse was rumpled and the bow was askew. Haruka grimaced; her mother was sure to be displeased with her appearance. She was a mess. Her mother…
"Oh, shit!" she cursed angrily; suddenly remembering her mother's words that morning. How her mother had wanted to talk to her.
Her mother was going to be really pissed. For starters, Haruka had been suspended from school for fighting. Again. Secondly, she was late and finally, she looked like hell. Just perfect. Her mother was going to kill her.
Haruka turned on to her street. She walked past the familiar buildings she had known since childhood, unchanged but for thirteen years of neglect. Tall, ugly apartment buildings, rectangular warehouses and sleazy strip malls. Discarded food wrappers, piles of grey melting snow, old rusty cars and other assorted debris littered the streets.
"Akin to a junk yard," she thought cynically.
She slowed as she reached the last apartment on the block; fourteen stories, dingy red brick, chipped paint, broken windows…home sweet home.
"Might as well get this over with," muttered Haruka under her breath.
She stepped through the door, walked up eleven flights of stairs, and opened the door. Ready to face the consequences of her actions, however harsh they may be.
She opened the door.
Her mother was positioned before her. Obviously awaiting her return, as she was seated in the entranceway. Arms folded across her breasts. Face set in disapproval. Shit.
Kotano was dressed in an elegant lavender robe, and her hair was held high on her head with tortoiseshell combs. Always the model, looking at her no one would guess of her poverty. Kotano relished in her appearance, and the appearances of others…
She grimaced at the state her daughter was in.
"So you've finally arrived," she said coldly, eyes scanning her daughter's crumpled uniform critically.
Haruka lowered her eyes, "Yeah. Sorry I'm late…"
"Late? You're beyond late, Haruka! Do you realise just what time it is?" her mother walked towards her daughter, and they stood inches apart.
"I…"
Kotano would not let her finish, "It is past midnight! I told you to be home at ten, no later! Just what the hell are you thinking, roaming the streets so late at night?"
"Mom," she started, but again Kotano interrupted.
"Do you realise just how dangerous it is to be out this late?" Kotano's voice rose, "Why, just last week a girl not much older than you was attacked not three blocks from here…found the next day with a bullet in her head."
Haruka was silent. There was no sense in interrupting her mother once she got started.
"It seems like every few weeks someone is attacked, and what do you do? You make yourself a walking target! Staying out so late…and just guess what pleasant surprise was waiting for me when I got home?"
Haruka gulped. Here it comes…
"Fighting! You've been fighting, again! How many times have I come home from a hard day of work, only to hear a message from your principal? Jesus Christ, five days suspension, five days suspension! This is your sixth suspension this term alone! Just what the hell is wrong with you?" Kotano was actually yelling, actually screaming. Her usually calm demeanour had diminished; all self-restraint and poise had vanished. Her face was red, her eyes flashing; she was positively livid.
"Just what the hell is wrong with you?"... The words echoed through Haruka's head. The question so many people asked her. What's wrong with you, Tenou? Why do you do the things you do? Why do you get into fights, why do you dress so sloppily, why do you hang around at the garage, why aren't you like other girls…
"I…"she could not answer. There was no answer. Why did she do the things she did? Why did she go looking for fights? She had enough battles going on in her life…why did she go looking for more? Why did she pursue others in search of a fight? She had to fight for everything she had; her life was a constant struggle, so why would she add to her troubles?
Haruka recalled the words her principal had spoken, words that hurt deeply.
"You are nothing but a burden," he had said, condemning her, "nothing but a lead weight around the necks of those responsible for you. People like you…they never get anywhere in life. Born to self-destruct, bound towards failure…just like your father."
Just like her father.
Oh, how those words had hurt! They had pierced through her armour, broken through her resistance! Why was it that words had the power to maim? The power to do what mere flesh wounds could not?
And yet she was powerless. Powerless to fight the onset of words, the onset of truth…
"Haruka! Just what have you to say for yourself?"
What could she say? That she fought to fulfill an unknown need, that it was her way of standing firm, of refusing to give in? She fought…because if she did not, she would drown. In order to survive, she must fight. Cursed to be different, to be born into this world, a world unyielding towards her, which tried to drag her down…
She was a survivor; born into this world of deceit and betrayal, of anguish and pain, of past battles unresolved. She adapted to her circumstances, a built in survival mechanism. If she did not fight, if she did not forbear, if she offered no resistance, then she would perish as her father had before her.
Ozawa was wrong. She was not like her father. There was a crucial difference; Haruka was willing to fight, whereas her father was not. Her father was not a fighter; he had given up, and as a result had been destroyed. Haruka, however, would never be destroyed; she would fight, she would not cave in, she would battle the world if need be…
The only true destruction is internal; only when you give up are you defeated. If you stood your ground, if you had self-conviction…then you would triumph.
She was not powerless; others could condemn her, they could say as they chose fit, but no one could make her accept their words. Only Haruka herself could make those decisions. It was within her power to interpret what others said; she could either discard their words or accept them. It was her choice. She was not powerless; she would never be powerless unless she chose to believe herself so.
Though this was all true of Haruka, it didn't mean that she was unable to be hurt. That she was unable to make mistakes. That she was able to completely disregard society's opinions. She was only thirteen, and still unsure of herself and her abilities. She had made a mistake: she had gone too far, and as a result needed to accept the consequences.
Accepting the consequences of your actions, accepting when you have been wrong, these are also signs of strength. Accepting your own mistakes is not the same as giving in; by accepting the consequences of one's actions can one learn from the experience, and grow stronger.
Haruka would not run. She had made a mistake, and she needed to accept the penalty of her actions.
With great strength did she raise her eyes and meet her mother's gaze.
"I don't know what I was thinking, Mom, but I realise that I was wrong…I'm sorry."
Kotano was surprised; she had expected denial, she had expected resistance, she had expected anything but acceptance of the situation and regret.
She looked at her daughter, really looked at her…and felt the same feeling she had that morning.
Kotano realised that she did not know who her daughter was.
Suddenly, the sound of footsteps could be heard coming from Kotano's bedroom. Both turned their heads towards the direction of the sound. Haruka tried to pass her mother, but Kotano took her arm.
"Haruka, there's something I have to tell you," she began, and suddenly, horribly, Haruka knew why her mother wanted her home early that night. What her mother had wanted to talk to her about…
"No," she whispered, her face growing paler as the full implication of what was happening dawned upon her.
"I wanted to tell you before, but you were late," Kotano said, regretfully, "I wanted you to know before…"
Haruka looked past her mother, and saw a large suitcase partially concealed behind the door that leads to the kitchen. She saw a pair of large black shoes next to the coat rack…on which a large coat hung. A suitcase, a man's coat, a man's shoes…
And there, appearing in the hallway was the figure of a large man: tall, with a shock of black hair and gleaming dark eyes. A man with a cruelly handsome face stood beside her mother. The man smirked at the scene before him. The man possessively wrapped his arm around her mother's waist.
Kotano sighed; the man grinned.
"So this is the daughter I've heard so much about," he said, grinning at the baffled Haruka. "Looks just like her mother."
Haruka just stared, stared at this strange man embracing her mother, stared at this strange man wearing nothing but boxers and a t-shirt. Suddenly the nausea returned with a vengeance; she felt faint, the room spun rapidly…
"Haruka," said her mother, "I'd like you to meet Hoshino Fujio."
*******
{Whew! This chapter was particularly difficult to write because of the two new characters! I appreciate the feedback and comments that people have given me so far, and look forward to hearing what you think of the newest instalment!
BTW, the title "Kaze mo Sora mo Kitto" means The Wind, The Sky, Always in Japanese. It is the title of the closing theme of Sailor Stars.}
-Brandt
The events of the day had taken their toll; Haruka was in an absolutely horrible mood and not afraid to let anyone know it.
She arrived for work distant and sullen, was snappy with the mechanics and customers, and did not utter a sound unless absolutely necessary.
Kumada Arika was worried about his prodigy junior racer. Usually she was flippant and confident, ranting about the injustices of her school and the various assholes that attended it. Usually she was sarcastic and enthusiastic and very, very interested in the events of the race track/auto shop. Usually she was eager and if not happy, content.
Today Haruka was not herself.
Kumada had known Haruka for nearly five years; he was her mentor and she was his prodigy. They were close, buddies, she was like a sister to him…and it hurt to see her so upset.
For Kumada knew that she was upset. He could see through her façade; he had known her for too long. Although she acted cross and was irritable, although she was distant and standoffish, Kumada knew that inside she was distressed, that she had somehow been hurt…
The poor kid had a lot against her; first of all her father was an absolute asshole who had deserted her and her mother, after putting them through hell beforehand. Her mother was never there for her daughter. At school she was an outcast, and was always getting in trouble for fighting…kids turned against her because everyone knew what her father had done… She was forced to fight for anything resembling a normal life, having to fight against invisible forces that were stacked against her…having to fight against fragments left over from the past, her parents' battles…the consequences of her parent's actions was the cross she was obliged to carry…
Kumada remembered well the day he had first laid eyes on Tenou Haruka…
*****
It had been five years prior, in the summer of '92. A former professional motorcycle and car racer, Kumada had just previously purchased his race track/auto shop after a serious accident had rendered him unable to professionally compete.
The day of their meeting, Kumada was hosting a semi-professional motorcycle competition. Although not a competitor, Kumada was a coach to several promising young racers…one of them being Marubeni Kotano's love interest at the time, Matsuda Denbe.
Kumada remembered Matsuda escorting a beautiful blond woman and her tall blond daughter into the racing pits. He remembered the young man, obviously smitten with the former model, showing her and her daughter the different motorcycles and guiding them through the garage. He remembered the young man trying to explain to them both the mechanics of how an engine worked…and he remembered the fascination and excitement on the young girl's face.
Haruka had found her calling that day at the racetrack. She had seen the race from the bleachers, and had immediately fallen in love with the high of the race, the speed of the cars, and the sheer power behind them. She had stood and cheered, oblivious to her condescending mother, oblivious to everything but the roar of the engines and the exhilaration of the race.
So exited was the girl that she stood out in Kumada's mind…amidst the vast crowds of people only that girl stood out, only the tall, thin girl with the waist length blond hair…only she was able to capture Kumada's attention…and he didn't even know her name.
During the weeks following the race, Kumada often saw the girl hanging around the auto shop, sometimes accompanied by Matsuda, sometimes on her own. Even after her mother had broken up with the devastated young racer was the girl present at the track, even when Matsuda left Kumada's establishment was the girl present…
Normally Kumada was not fond of children; a self-proclaimed recluse, he found it difficult to develop relationships with others regardless of their age…especially children. There were few people close to him, few people he could consider friends, he seemed content to avoid others outside of his close-knit circle…but there was something about that girl that intrigued him.
Finally one day he decided to approach her. He had just finished a custom body job on a '67 Mustang, and was aware of the girl standing against the far wall.
Not one for small talk, Kumada had gone straight to the point.
"Hey kid, what are you doing?"
She had looked at him in surprise; having seen him numerous times beforehand, this marked the first occasion that he had spoken to her.
"I'm just watching," she had replied, direct and straightforward.
Kumada had walked over to her; up close she looked younger than he had initially thought. Being so tall he had figured her to be at least ten or eleven, but up close he could see that he had been wrong.
"You like cars?" he had asked her.
Suddenly a big grin had appeared on her face. "Yeah, do I ever! I especially like racers, like that blue Porsche over there," she said, pointing to Kumada's personal favourite car, the car in which he had won the Okura District Championship driving.
"Hey, that's my favourite, too. You know what model it is?"
Her smile widened, "Of course! It's a 1985 Porsche 944 Turbo!"
Kumada had been struck speechless; she had been dead on. Since it was a custom racer, the name of the car was not written above the bumper. Damn, the kid was good.
"Yeah, that's right! You know, I won many a race with that car, do you want to take a look at it?"
"Sure!" The girl had exclaimed, excitement colouring her cheeks pink.
Kumada had shown the girl the car, asking her questions and testing her knowledge. He had been pleasantly surprised at her vast understanding of cars, and had been pleased with her enthusiasm on the subject and her desire to learn more. Kumada had spent the entire afternoon talking with the girl, and it wasn't until she was leaving that they got around to introducing themselves.
So began the saga of Tenou Haruka and Kumada Akira.
Haruka would visit Kumada's shop almost everyday after school, despite it being over an hours walk away.
In the beginning, Haruka had just watched Kumada and the mechanics, but as time went on Kumada encouraged her to take part in the washing and deodorizing of the cars. Kumada gradually taught her to change the oil, how to repair engines and other assorted auto maintenance jobs. Finally he taught her to do bodywork. As a result, Haruka was as knowledgeable as a mechanic at the age of twelve.
Kumada was also her racing coach; he had taught her at ten years on his old BMW R 75/6. Though only thirteen Haruka was able to ride Kumada's old motorcycle like a pro.
Although Haruka and Kumada's relationship was based mainly on cars, there existed a stronger bond between them. Neither was particularly talkative or open about their personal lives or feelings, but as time went on both became aware of each other's personality traits and moods. If one was down, the other was able to recognise this and respond accordingly. They were able to offer comfort and support to each other without specifics, without details; words or explanations were unnecessary.
Kumada was able to see through the mask that hid Haruka's true feelings from the world.
*****
Kumada stood in the area below the bleachers, watching the motorcyclist rip through the racetrack. A motorcyclist who possessed unbelievable talent, who was able to perform manoeuvres impossible to decipher, who rode as if the wind…
Tenou Haruka sped around the arena, cutting a seriously close corner at break neck speed; even in his prime Kumada knew he wouldn't have been able to pull off a stunt like that.
The bike screeched to a halt, and Haruka dismounted amidst a cloud of dust. Clad in a navy blue racing suit, she stood out amidst the surrounding smokescreen. She pulled off her helmet and tossed her head back, her long blond ponytail tumbling from her helmet and blowing in the wind. The expression on her face was close to rapture, the look only worn after a good race.
She held her hand above her brow, squinting through the dust at the evening sky. Her features clouded over; apart from the race her troubles resurfaced and once again the events of the day troubled her as they had before. The race had only been an interlude, a brief escape from the difficulties and troubles that she faced everyday.
Sighing, Haruka walked the bike out of the arena and into the garage; Kumada watched her departure with sympathy. He followed her soon after.
Kumada found Haruka in the BMW's stall, polishing the blue vehicle until it shone. He smiled; despite her mood, Haruka could always be counted on to keep his motorcycle in top condition.
So intent on the motorcycle was Haruka that she failed to notice Kumada step beside her kneeling form and rest his arm against the wall.
"Hey Tenou, you were really looking good out there," he said; Haruka's head spun around in surprise and Kumada was shocked to see tears swimming in her blue-grey eyes.
"Oh," he spoke, at a loss for words. Not once had he seen her cry, not once in the five years that he had known her.
Quickly Haruka stood and turned her back to Kumada, too embarrassed to let him see her this way. She dug frantically through her pockets in search of a tissue. Upon finding none, she rubbed her eyes with the corner of her sleeve. The gesture struck Kumada as childlike but also as proud; she would not let anyone see her with her guard down.
"Hey, Tenou, come on, what's wrong?" Kumada asked sympathetically, placing his hand on her shoulder…a shoulder almost level with his own yet much smaller, seeming almost vulnerable…
"Nothing," she muttered, trying to escape his grasp, but he wouldn't let her.
Kumada wouldn't permit her run from him. She kept too much bottled inside herself, and damned if he was going to let her endure this pain alone.
"Come on, Tenou, talk to me," he pleaded, worry creeping into his voice, "I know something's wrong, you've been acting strange all day, please, talk to me…"
"I said nothing's wrong!" she retaliated, her words harsh but her tone one of angst.
He was not persuaded; he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and he felt her resistance dissolve.
She hung her head; her small shoulders, usually straight and proud now slumped and defeated. Her long hair was spilling out of its ponytail and over her shoulders, the strands reaching past her waist…she hid behind her curtain of hair.
"I…I can't, Kumada-san, I just can't…"she whispered, her voice heavy with pain and unshed anguish. She would not face him.
"Hey, its OK, really, it is. You can talk to me, you know I won't judge you…"
"I know," she replied, weakening but still stubborn. "I know that you won't laugh, or pass judgement, but…its just too personal."
"You don't have to give details, Tenou, I know its not your way…but, can you give me the gist of it, at least?" He smiled sadly, "I know that you're hurting, I know you've been hurting for years…and I know that it's difficult to talk about. But it'll help if you can get some of it off your chest…please, Tenou, I'm here for you."
She swallowed, and slowly turned around. The tears were shinning in her eyes, her hands were clenched into fists, and she bit down on her lower lip…struggling to stop the tears from falling. She would not cry in front of the one person she respected and valued as a friend.
He led her towards the bench outside the garage looking out towards the arena. The slight evening breeze ruffled her hair; she bent her head up towards the sky as if searching for reassurance.
They sat down beside one another, Kumada's form bent towards her, Haruka looking down; he grasped her right hand and applied slight pressure.
The cool late winter air was a welcome presence outside of the unbearable heat of the garage. Outside the air was clean and refreshing, Haruka drew strength from the cool night and began.
"I almost killed someone at school today,"
Kumada gasped, started coughing, "You WHAT?! Almost killed someone at school! Come on, Tenou, seriously…"
Haruka scowled and stood up, "I am serious! I thought that I could trust you…"
"Hey, I'm sorry, Tenou, really! Sit back down; really, I'm sorry! But what do you expect my reaction to be when you tell me you almost killed someone?"
She smiled wryly, "Hmm, I guess you have a point," she sat back down and stretched her long legs, looking up at the setting sun whimsically.
"So, do you care to elaborate, or am I to assume you've gone off the deep end?" Kumada joked, trying to take pressure off the situation and put Haruka at ease.
She smiled lightly at Kumada's efforts, but the smile did not reach her eyes. She appreciated that he was trying to make things easier, but at the same time felt as if it were useless to lighten the mood. Once he heard her out, Haruka doubted that he would be able to take things light-heartedly.
"I guess I should try to explain…" she said, "It all started this morning…I can't go into details, but my Mom is upset with me for something…something for which I cannot help, or take control of, something inevitable yet still surprising to her…"
Kumada raised his eyebrow slightly, "Was it something that you've done?"
"No, not really…more like something that happened to me. I wanted to keep it to myself, but I needed her help, so I was forced to reveal it to her…"
"And I can assume that she wasn't happy?"
"Yeah, she certainly wasn't happy about it, but I can't exactly explain just how she felt towards me. She was…distant…not angry, not frustrated…disappointed, maybe? I'm not sure. Anyway, her reaction was kind of a downer, if you know what I mean. So when I got to school I wasn't in a very good mood."
Kumada nodded sympathetically. "OK. So, you go to school, and you're upset, and then…"
"Well, you know the thing that was bothering my mother? Because of this thing…I kind of vandalised something in the bathroom."
"What? I'm not really following you, Tenou,"
Haruka sighed, "I guess I can't explain myself if I leave out too much information, right? Ok, I'll try to break it to you, but promise not to get grossed out."
"I promise. Jeez, Tenou, how bad could it possibly be?"
"Just don't say I didn't warn you…I'll just say that this is something that happens when you grow older…to girls…"
"I don't…Oh, shit…" Kumada turned a violent shade of red, and suddenly he found something about his shoes incredibly interesting.
Haruka laughed, lessoning the tension. "Sorry, but if you weren't such an idiot I wouldn't have had to go into details…"
There was a brief period of silence while Kumada regained his composure.
"OK, so you were going through…your time of month…and you vandalised something in the bathroom…"
"Yeah. So, during lunch hour, I was sitting outside, and I heard a scream. Now, being pissed off and edgy, my natural reaction was to release some of this anger I had been carrying around all day…so I went to investigate."
Haruka took a deep breath, "I followed the direction that the scream had come from…and I saw this guy, Saeki, picking on a smaller boy. The boy was face down in a puddle of mud, and wasn't wearing any pants…"
"Oh, Jesus, Tenou," Kumada groaned, feeling sick.
"Yeah, my thoughts exactly…anyways, this Saeki seemed like an asshole (Kumada coughed, rather obviously), OK, he WAS an asshole, and he seemed like the perfect target. So I approached him, and made some crack about his manliness…
Kumada moaned, "Tenou!"
"Oh, come on, Kumada-san! I was desperate for a good fight! So, I insulted him, and he lunged at me to prove himself, or something…and I kicked his ass, as usual…and then he did something unexpected."
She paused, weighing her words. However much she liked Kumada, there were some things that she couldn't tell him, some things that she couldn't even admit to herself…
"What did he do?" asked Kumada softly.
"He…he said something really cruel…something that hurt me, deep inside…and I retaliated the only way I could…" she looked down at her clasped hands, unable to meet his gaze, "…I strangled him until he passed out…and didn't stop until someone screamed. It was then that I realised just what I was doing…I saw Saeki below me, my arms grasping his throat…and he was blue, his face was fucking blue…"
"Oh, shit, Tenou," said Kumada, feeling sick.
"Around his neck…were bruises, and bruises were beginning to appear on his face…and his hands, they were curled into claws, and they were convulsing…"
"Oh, sweet Jesus,"
"And the worst thing was that I don't remember strangling him. My mind…after his words, my mind was so filled with pain that I was unaware of what I was doing…a blackout, or something…"
Her hands were shaking, but still she continued, "I was so scared, I just couldn't believe what I had done. His pulse…it was so weak…I think that another thirty seconds would have finished him off. There was screaming all around me; I couldn't move, I was paralysed...even when I heard a teacher approaching I remained immobile. The teacher, he was flabbergasted, he just couldn't believe his eyes…started stuttering like a moron…he didn't know whether to help the kid in the mud, or Saeki…It was then that I was able to gain control of myself."
Kumada was shocked. It was unbelievable how quickly control could be lost, how emotions could wreck havoc…
"I was sent to the Principal's office. Principal Ozawa, I've mentioned him before…he hit the roof. Couldn't believe what I had done. Said that I almost killed Saeki. He looked like he wanted to hit me. He wanted to know just what the hell I was thinking, he demanded an answer, but I simply couldn't respond. He saw my silence as resistance, as indifference…and this only caused his anger to grow. He started going on about how bad seeds spawned bad offspring…he insulted my father, he insulted my mother, he called me a bastard…and still I couldn't answer. I just couldn't defend myself. He was right. I HAD almost killed Saeki; I deserved this shit…so I took it. Just it wasn't enough. He wanted to know why I did what I did."
"Oh, Tenou," Kumada whispered, but Haruka was not finished.
"I didn't understand what the hell I had been thinking…not really. All I knew was that Saeki had wounded me terribly, and I had retaliated the only way I knew how. I only knew that the pain he had inflicted struck me deep, in a place that I refused to acknowledge…"
The part of her that she kept hidden from the world…and herself.
"At this time the other teacher, the one who discovered the fight, interrupted…and damned if he didn't defend me. He claimed that I was defending the other kid; the one who Saeki had been picking on before I arrived…said that I might have saved the other kid's life. Apparently Saeki had beaten this poor kid almost as badly as I beat him…before he forced the kid to fuck the mud. This poor kid, he was epileptic, and he was having a seizure. Almost died. None of the bystanders offered any help. The kid, after his seizure, he collapsed in the mud…he couldn't get up, and the mud was blocking his airway. According to this teacher, if I hadn't interrupted Saeki's attack on this kid, then the kid would have suffocated."
At this point Kumada was unable to take any more; his face was green and his eyes were wide with shock. He looked at the girl beside him, the girl he had known years, and realised for perhaps the first time just what kind of a world she lived in.
"So what happened?" asked Kumada.
"I was lucky. Considering the fact that I may have indirectly saved this kid's life, I managed to get off with only five days suspension. Ozawa was fit to be tied, but even he couldn't ignore the fact that I supposedly saved the kid's life. Poor kid, he was retarded, too."
Haruka closed her eyes and enjoyed the cool breeze across her face. The weight of her words still hung in the air, and for the moment both simply remained in silence. Haruka needed this period to recover, Kumada to absorb what she had told him.
Kumada was the first to break the silence. "How do you feel about this, Tenou?"
She shrugged. "I'm not quite sure how I feel. On the one hand I'm glad that I was able to help this kid, but on the other hand…that wasn't the reason I got involved. The truth is that the reason I fought Saeki wasn't to save this kid, it was to release my frustrations. I didn't fight Saeki for anything but selfish purposes. I was looking for a fight, and Saeki just happened to be around. I didn't give a shit about the kid; I didn't know the extent of his injuries, I didn't know that he was retarded or epileptic, and most importantly I didn't know that his life was in danger. The fact that I may have saved the kid doesn't make up for the fact that I could have killed Saeki. How do I feel? Pretty damn bad about myself."
It was at this point that Kumada embraced her. Both were surprised; theirs was not a physical relationship. But it felt right. Haruka felt his arms around her, and she felt the frustration and pain of her day fall from her shoulders. Kumada held her close, this poor, fucked up kid without anyone to turn towards.
They did not part until the last light of day disappeared.
*****
Through the streets she ventured, heedless of all but the route before her. The sounds of laughter came from the shadows. Haruka picked up her pace as the laughter grew louder.
The streets of East Osaka were dangerous after darkness fell.
Despite Kumada's protests, Haruka had insisted that she was able to walk home. She had been too much of a burden already.
Haruka shoved her hands into her worn jean jacket, cursing that she hadn't thought to wear gloves. Although winter was nearly over, the nights were still cold. As a result she was ill prepared for the current temperature, being that she had planned on returning home before dark. Of course, nothing happened according to plan today…
"Stupid," she cursed herself, recalling her actions earlier that evening. Pouring her heart out to Kumada…sure, he was her friend, but he was a guy. Now he probably thought of her being weak, being clingy…he probably thought worse of her.
The wind blew her hair about her shoulders; it had come undone. Her long skirt whipped around her legs; her blouse was rumpled and the bow was askew. Haruka grimaced; her mother was sure to be displeased with her appearance. She was a mess. Her mother…
"Oh, shit!" she cursed angrily; suddenly remembering her mother's words that morning. How her mother had wanted to talk to her.
Her mother was going to be really pissed. For starters, Haruka had been suspended from school for fighting. Again. Secondly, she was late and finally, she looked like hell. Just perfect. Her mother was going to kill her.
Haruka turned on to her street. She walked past the familiar buildings she had known since childhood, unchanged but for thirteen years of neglect. Tall, ugly apartment buildings, rectangular warehouses and sleazy strip malls. Discarded food wrappers, piles of grey melting snow, old rusty cars and other assorted debris littered the streets.
"Akin to a junk yard," she thought cynically.
She slowed as she reached the last apartment on the block; fourteen stories, dingy red brick, chipped paint, broken windows…home sweet home.
"Might as well get this over with," muttered Haruka under her breath.
She stepped through the door, walked up eleven flights of stairs, and opened the door. Ready to face the consequences of her actions, however harsh they may be.
She opened the door.
Her mother was positioned before her. Obviously awaiting her return, as she was seated in the entranceway. Arms folded across her breasts. Face set in disapproval. Shit.
Kotano was dressed in an elegant lavender robe, and her hair was held high on her head with tortoiseshell combs. Always the model, looking at her no one would guess of her poverty. Kotano relished in her appearance, and the appearances of others…
She grimaced at the state her daughter was in.
"So you've finally arrived," she said coldly, eyes scanning her daughter's crumpled uniform critically.
Haruka lowered her eyes, "Yeah. Sorry I'm late…"
"Late? You're beyond late, Haruka! Do you realise just what time it is?" her mother walked towards her daughter, and they stood inches apart.
"I…"
Kotano would not let her finish, "It is past midnight! I told you to be home at ten, no later! Just what the hell are you thinking, roaming the streets so late at night?"
"Mom," she started, but again Kotano interrupted.
"Do you realise just how dangerous it is to be out this late?" Kotano's voice rose, "Why, just last week a girl not much older than you was attacked not three blocks from here…found the next day with a bullet in her head."
Haruka was silent. There was no sense in interrupting her mother once she got started.
"It seems like every few weeks someone is attacked, and what do you do? You make yourself a walking target! Staying out so late…and just guess what pleasant surprise was waiting for me when I got home?"
Haruka gulped. Here it comes…
"Fighting! You've been fighting, again! How many times have I come home from a hard day of work, only to hear a message from your principal? Jesus Christ, five days suspension, five days suspension! This is your sixth suspension this term alone! Just what the hell is wrong with you?" Kotano was actually yelling, actually screaming. Her usually calm demeanour had diminished; all self-restraint and poise had vanished. Her face was red, her eyes flashing; she was positively livid.
"Just what the hell is wrong with you?"... The words echoed through Haruka's head. The question so many people asked her. What's wrong with you, Tenou? Why do you do the things you do? Why do you get into fights, why do you dress so sloppily, why do you hang around at the garage, why aren't you like other girls…
"I…"she could not answer. There was no answer. Why did she do the things she did? Why did she go looking for fights? She had enough battles going on in her life…why did she go looking for more? Why did she pursue others in search of a fight? She had to fight for everything she had; her life was a constant struggle, so why would she add to her troubles?
Haruka recalled the words her principal had spoken, words that hurt deeply.
"You are nothing but a burden," he had said, condemning her, "nothing but a lead weight around the necks of those responsible for you. People like you…they never get anywhere in life. Born to self-destruct, bound towards failure…just like your father."
Just like her father.
Oh, how those words had hurt! They had pierced through her armour, broken through her resistance! Why was it that words had the power to maim? The power to do what mere flesh wounds could not?
And yet she was powerless. Powerless to fight the onset of words, the onset of truth…
"Haruka! Just what have you to say for yourself?"
What could she say? That she fought to fulfill an unknown need, that it was her way of standing firm, of refusing to give in? She fought…because if she did not, she would drown. In order to survive, she must fight. Cursed to be different, to be born into this world, a world unyielding towards her, which tried to drag her down…
She was a survivor; born into this world of deceit and betrayal, of anguish and pain, of past battles unresolved. She adapted to her circumstances, a built in survival mechanism. If she did not fight, if she did not forbear, if she offered no resistance, then she would perish as her father had before her.
Ozawa was wrong. She was not like her father. There was a crucial difference; Haruka was willing to fight, whereas her father was not. Her father was not a fighter; he had given up, and as a result had been destroyed. Haruka, however, would never be destroyed; she would fight, she would not cave in, she would battle the world if need be…
The only true destruction is internal; only when you give up are you defeated. If you stood your ground, if you had self-conviction…then you would triumph.
She was not powerless; others could condemn her, they could say as they chose fit, but no one could make her accept their words. Only Haruka herself could make those decisions. It was within her power to interpret what others said; she could either discard their words or accept them. It was her choice. She was not powerless; she would never be powerless unless she chose to believe herself so.
Though this was all true of Haruka, it didn't mean that she was unable to be hurt. That she was unable to make mistakes. That she was able to completely disregard society's opinions. She was only thirteen, and still unsure of herself and her abilities. She had made a mistake: she had gone too far, and as a result needed to accept the consequences.
Accepting the consequences of your actions, accepting when you have been wrong, these are also signs of strength. Accepting your own mistakes is not the same as giving in; by accepting the consequences of one's actions can one learn from the experience, and grow stronger.
Haruka would not run. She had made a mistake, and she needed to accept the penalty of her actions.
With great strength did she raise her eyes and meet her mother's gaze.
"I don't know what I was thinking, Mom, but I realise that I was wrong…I'm sorry."
Kotano was surprised; she had expected denial, she had expected resistance, she had expected anything but acceptance of the situation and regret.
She looked at her daughter, really looked at her…and felt the same feeling she had that morning.
Kotano realised that she did not know who her daughter was.
Suddenly, the sound of footsteps could be heard coming from Kotano's bedroom. Both turned their heads towards the direction of the sound. Haruka tried to pass her mother, but Kotano took her arm.
"Haruka, there's something I have to tell you," she began, and suddenly, horribly, Haruka knew why her mother wanted her home early that night. What her mother had wanted to talk to her about…
"No," she whispered, her face growing paler as the full implication of what was happening dawned upon her.
"I wanted to tell you before, but you were late," Kotano said, regretfully, "I wanted you to know before…"
Haruka looked past her mother, and saw a large suitcase partially concealed behind the door that leads to the kitchen. She saw a pair of large black shoes next to the coat rack…on which a large coat hung. A suitcase, a man's coat, a man's shoes…
And there, appearing in the hallway was the figure of a large man: tall, with a shock of black hair and gleaming dark eyes. A man with a cruelly handsome face stood beside her mother. The man smirked at the scene before him. The man possessively wrapped his arm around her mother's waist.
Kotano sighed; the man grinned.
"So this is the daughter I've heard so much about," he said, grinning at the baffled Haruka. "Looks just like her mother."
Haruka just stared, stared at this strange man embracing her mother, stared at this strange man wearing nothing but boxers and a t-shirt. Suddenly the nausea returned with a vengeance; she felt faint, the room spun rapidly…
"Haruka," said her mother, "I'd like you to meet Hoshino Fujio."
*******
{Whew! This chapter was particularly difficult to write because of the two new characters! I appreciate the feedback and comments that people have given me so far, and look forward to hearing what you think of the newest instalment!
BTW, the title "Kaze mo Sora mo Kitto" means The Wind, The Sky, Always in Japanese. It is the title of the closing theme of Sailor Stars.}
-Brandt